What is this!?! - Page 2

[journeymom]

I think your oldest is probably jealous and resentful of your youngest. They'll both grow up a bit and the behavior will stop for a while. Then they'll both grow into a different phase and a new obnoxious behavior will develop. When they're all grown up they'll behave themselves, mostly. My kids are four years apart. Dd is 13 y.o., ds is almost 9 y.o. While taken on the whole they probably play together and get along fine more than they fight, it's still really distressing when they do fight. Because that's mostly what sticks out in my mind. It's so painful and frustrating. She's developed this obsessive compulsive dislike for the way he eats and she picks on him constantly for it. She also eggs him on, starts to rough house with him when she knows he can't handle it, then says he's being too sensitive. His temper goes from 0 to 60 in no time flat and he screams and cries in anger at her. Then he gets physical and I have to reprimand him for hitting, when I know she did something to piss him off. Then he'll do the same to her.

Ah, family!

[MPsSweetie]

About gifts, we are really trying to get out of the habit of having any at all. Maybe 1-2 at birthdays and Christmas. She is way to much of a material girl. We do try to make things special for her though, like special dinners, movie nights with popcorn, extra stories at bedtime, board games after Asheby has gone to bed, etc. I promise we really do try!! It does nothing, except maybe makes it worse.

It really gets to the point where neither of us want to be around her at all.

Then today... (here we go again!) my Mom brought over their easter gifts. A book for each of them and some candy. Amethyst went on and on about how she couldn't read her book (she can) and kept trying to take Ashebys. She acted like she hated her gift, right in front of my mom. My mom had a stroke in 2006 and can't control her emotions and it really upset her and she left. I feel so bad. I am so embarrassed that she is acting this way! I feel like we are doing something wrong, making her an ungrateful little brat.

Oh, and btw, we homeschool, usually during Ashebys naptime, and when she acts this way, I don't want to be near her at all, not even for that. Which, of course, is another thing to feel guilty about. I don't know if maybe we should just send her to ps, or keep trying! I am so freaking tired of this.

[emmasmommy]

My dd is the same age (a couple months younger, but close enough), and acts pretty much the same way at times.

I have no advice unfortunately, but reading this thread has reassured me, that Emma isn't the only 5 year old in the world like this. Thankfully, she is a sweetheart at school and daycare at least!!

[journeymom]

Originally Posted by MPsSweetie

Oh, and btw, we homeschool, usually during Ashebys naptime, and when she acts this way, I don't want to be near her at all, not even for that. Which, of course, is another thing to feel guilty about. I don't know if maybe we should just send her to ps, or keep trying! I am so freaking tired of this.

You have my permission to send her to preschool. ( Like that matters!) If only because it will give you a break. And don't discount how important it is for Mom to get a break, especially if all this resentment is growing. I know what you're thinking! What did women do before there was preschool? They sent their kids over to Grandma's house, and Grandma lived next door. Or they got hysterically angry and spanked their kids. They had a tough time or they had help.

[chfriend]

I understand a desire for simple living and it took a lot of work for me to get my mind around gifts as a love language. But if you've recently decided that your not going to give them and her behavior has declined, and she was hurt that gma and gpa and the Bunny gave her gifts (so they love her) and you didn't (so you don't).....well, maybe give the book a read.

It really sounds like "acts of service" and "quality time" might be your love languages....

ETA: Maybe something like this would meet both your needs: click through to page 1 and then page 2 for the .pdf's of kid coupons: http://www.frugal-families.com/print...ds-coupons.htm

[jenniepaige]

Oh man. I could have written this. I actually did just write something similiar about bed time. I SO know how you feel and you are SO not alone. I can't give any advice cause right now I need some of my own. And I hate that I feel that way too. My hope is that they will eventually grow out of it.

[MPsSweetie]

Thanks for all the advice and support. I'm glad shes not the only one, but I hate that other people have go through it too!