Those of you who had extreme challenges breastfeeding....

[blueridgewoman]

I have a question about solids. Or rather, my attitude towards solids.

Did you feel reluctant to start your baby on solids? Aside from, of course, waiting until they are clearly ready (which my daughter, at five months, is not though perhaps she is getting close)?

I find myself wanting to delay solids indefinitely not only because it is healthier for her, but because I treasure our breastfeeding relationship. I know that she will, of course, continue to breastfeed most likely after she begins solids and for a very long time, but I seem to have some sort of emotional issue with the whole thing.

I realize that this is very selfish of me. I just keep thinking how hard we've both worked at breastfeeding and what a long road it's been. And I get teary when I think of her getting nutrition anywhere other than at my breast.

My partner sees our daughter nearly being able to sit on her own, losing her tongue thrust, reaching desperately for food and says that she'll probably enjoy a bit of self feeding around six months or shortly thereafter. DP is excited about this prospect. I, however am not. I see a baby who is perfectly happy breastfeeding and eating breastmilk from a spoon (to get her probiotic supplement) and not seeming to be hungry or deprived though she does show the beginnings of solid readiness.

I want to make it clear that both my partner and I are absolutely committed to waiting until dd is six months old AND shows all signs of readiness to start solids, but that's less than a month away and I honestly find myself almost panicking a bit when I think about it.

I guess I'm just wondering if this is normal.

[veganone]

Me too. I never would have imagined that I would fight like I did to keep bfing, but now I plan on going as long as she'll let me since I feel like we finally made it, you know? And yes, I am fearful of solids "replacing" momma to some degree. DH is totally on board with delaying (DD is 6 1/2 months), but she is showing so much interest that now I'm having a hard time not giving her solids since she's sooo interested in trying them.

[kimbersdawnly]

I totally understand where you are coming from! This made me nervous with my daughter as well, since we have had a ton of bf problems and she has been gaga about food since long before I would let her have any.

I think the best thing to do is to approach solids as something to explore rather than something to consume. What I mean by that is giving baby foods that she can explore rather than shoveling baby food into her like so many parents do. (My disclaimer: Obviously, parental vigilance in necessary in case of choking, but the gag reflex in an infant usually will do what it should. But in case it doesn't every parent should know what to do! Review baby heimlich guidelines, and remember usually holding them laying on their belly, face unobstructed, and patting firmly on the back will help them get expel anything that gets stuck.)

I give my baby things like a whole, organic, very ripe pear and she will gum at it, suckle a little juice, and in general is thrilled learning about and exploring food, but isn't eating much of it. Basically we give her foods she can taste and explore, rather than things she can eat a lot of. Soft cooked brown rice is great for little hands to run through and a nice texture to explore with the tongue. I even give her the top 1/4 of a banana (in peel) because she can squish a little out to eat (it comes out mush anyway) and teeth on the peel - she loves it! Mashed potatoes are fun to play in, satsuma sections have no seeds and baby can suck a little juice from them, currents are tiny and great foods for practicing pinching with the thumb and forefinger. Nice fluffy breads are also fun to crumble and squish and pick apart. Anyway, basically we approach solids as more of a learning experience than a feeding one, and it has worked out beautifully with both our children.

Hope that helps!

[elanorh]

We had tremendous supply issues with my severe-reflux, multiple food allergies dd1 - it took me months to build back up to a full supply.

We were nervous about solids, too. It was so difficult to get back to 100% breast in the first place, add in the known allergy issues, and we were scared. Me more so than dh.

We, too, approached solids as an exploration and took it really, really slowly. I think Ina was about 7 months and SJ more like 8 months before we started solids, and we did so with literally a smear of squash to play with, nothing big for quite awhile. We let them pace it, and always remembered to nurse before eating, rather than eating before nursing.

Incidentally, SJ didn't have any bf problems either - and I still was nervous about solids. Either I learned it from Ina, or else this reticence is more common than we realize?

[UUMom]

I have breastfed a low birth weight baby (through weeks of cracked and bleeding nipples) and a baby who was gifted to me through adoption at nearly 4 months. They were given solids when they reached out , grabbed them, and put them dirtectly into their mouths. That's how much I value my breastfeeding relationships lol

I have never throught solids were all that for babies. : Not even for my two who were easy to breastfeed. My oldest was over a year before he got solids of any kind, and my youngest was 8 months...and it was because she reached for it and plopped it into her little mouth. None of my children had baby food.

[jencen]

I was very hesitant as well after we had been through clogged ducts, blebs, mastitis, yeast infections, etc, etc. DS is 9 months and has been on solids since 6 months and we still maintain our very wonderfully loving breastfeeding on a regular basis. I feed him a solid breakfast and dinner, but other than that, he still breastfeeds 5-8 times/day. It is not exclusionary at this point, nor for as long as both of you want it to be.
:mama to jojo

[sarahjackm]

Yes!

While a small part of me was excited about the new chapter that solids brought, I was terrified of replacing myself with solids. DD had a disorganized suck/swallow and spent 9 days in the NICU before she could come home on the bottle. It took 3 months of exclusively pumping and struggling before I had her completely on the breast and off the bottle and nipple shields.

She's 14 months old now and sometimes I wish she wasn't nursing as much. I work out of the home full-time and quit pumping at one year. She nurses at will at night, first thing in the morning and a few times in the evening at least.

I go back and forth between thinking she nurses too much and hating the fact that if something happened she'd be fine nutritionally without me.

[racheloperasinger]

Yes! At the time, though, I had just completed my Breastfeeding Counselor course, in which they clearly outlined the signs of readiness for solid food. At about 6 months, DD demonstrated every last one. And I waited until the whole list was observable because we had fought so hard to resurrect our BFing relationship from the dead (well, not quite, but you know...) But after that, we took it really slow. It was a long time before solids replaced breastfeedings.

[pazerific]

i think you sound totally normal and sane OP! i BFed my dd from birth to 8mos and then had to EP from 8mos til i was just done at 17mos (long story). i am absolutely going to take the same approach with solids for the next babe that UUMom described--when they can grab it and eat it on their own, they're welcome to it, but not before that.

[blueridgewoman]

I'm not actually worried, I just don't wanna.

But thank you-- it's good to hear that I'm not alone and I feel like I'll come around when I get the cues that she's ready. I sort of interpret my reluctance to sensing that she's not ready to a degree. Hopefully.