Reportcards Are In... Do I Pass Along The Info?

[mirthfulmum]

My oldest is in Kindergarten so his report cards aren't graded, just the working above grade level/at grade level/needs improvement style reporting.

So should I show the report card with my son? Should I share with him what the teacher observed as needing improvement?

My inclination is to take the info with a grain of salt (we moved in Jan and he transfered into the classroom only 2 and a half months ago) and let it be. His main "needs improvement"s are around his writing of letters and numbers (my brother and my husband both have the hand writing of a sociopath so I'm not surprised my son's penmanship leaves a lot to be desired). He also gets really nervous when "tested" and to my chagrin she took each child aside privately and tested them on their counting and shape ID, my son panicked and apparently couldn't ID a square, that's on his report card

So what do you think? Is it important for him at this age to be aware he's being assessed and graded?

[swampwitch]

I think I'd take the approach of, "Hey, sweetie, how about we practice writing our letters. Can you show mommy how good you write?" And then you can coach him. I was a kid who was very affected by the disappointment if I wasn't up to standard, so I don't think it is important that he knows what his teacher has put on his report card.

[LookMommy!]

I see no reason to share this info with him. But we never had report cards in Kindy (in Israel) so I can't imagine that it is necessary.

My 8th grader is getting report cards today. I told her if she didn't pass all her classes, not to bother coming home. Ever. She laughed, but was I really kidding?

[lightheart]

Our guy gets a report every month that we have to sign and return. I do comment on it saying that he has done a great job blah blah blah, buttering up the good points and not really pointing out his weaknesses. I then work extra on those things that have the dash line instead of the check mark next to them.

I guess in a way I do tell him that he does need to work on XYZ but not with the report card in hand, I kinda disassociate the report itself with the conversation we have that he needs to spend time on a certain skill.

[CarrieMF]

As long as you're accentuating the positives & not putting pressure on him I see nothing wrong with sharing it with him. He already knows one came home. My kids love it when I read what's on thier report cards. They like it even more when they see improvement.

[MattBronsil]

Studies show that people who know they are being assessed (or graded) do lower quality work than those who are not assessed. I would let it go. There is plenty of time for him to lose interest in work after he is done with Kindergarten.

Repetition and choice is the key to success in learning. Just make sure he still has those opportunities available to him when he chooses to do them - at home or at school.

Matt

[pibblestiltskin@ma]

When my dd was in Kindy I had to take her with me to the conferences and her teacher always called her over at the end to tell her what we'd been talking about (in a totally appropriate way and so much better than I would have). I loved that teacher! I am keeping my fingers and toes crossed that ds gets the same one!

My point above is that the report cards (for us) are tied to conferences so it was obvious that that I was talking to the teacher about my dd. If your ds knows the report came home I'd explain what it is and what it said in very general terms - praise the good stuff and leave the rest. I wouldn't make it a big deal.

[1xmom]

Sometimes I think it depends on the child as well. when my dd was in K, they got 1,2,3's. She received one "2" b/c she only counted to 73 or something and not to 100. Which I didn't think was a big deal, and neither did the teacher really, but she stressed over that and she is in 2nd grade now and STILL talks about getting a "2". She is one of those oversensitive, perfectionist kind of children who definately sweats the small stuff.

[karne]

I wonder what you would hope would happen by sharing this info with your son? I can't imagine a child not "needing improvement" (I hate that phrase) in kindy.....I mean they're in kindy after all! Personally I would assume my child would continue to improve over time, because that's usually a developmental given. If that isn't happening then I think that's a grown=up conversation first, and then a plan would be developed to support the child. But in kindy I think just being in school, getting the routine, etc. is a pretty big deal.

[mirthfulmum]

Originally Posted by karne

I wonder what you would hope would happen by sharing this info with your son?

Honestly, I didn't really see any positives in sharing the report card info with my son. Many of you touched on my concerns that if he was made aware that he was being assesed and graded, and what the grades ment, he'd get discouraged and stressed. But I wanted to touch base with the wise women here to gain a different perspective.

Another factor that makes me so reluctant to share the report card (and take the teacher's assesments seriously) is that my son's only in this school because when we moved here there was no space for him in the public Montessori school. He was in public Montessori in the city we had lived in before, and will return to public Montessori for grade 1. So along with a move and a change in classroom/teacher he's also had to shift his expectations around learning and what goes on in a classroom.

Originally Posted by MattBronsil

Studies show that people who know they are being assessed (or graded) do lower quality work than those who are not assessed. I would let it go. There is plenty of time for him to lose interest in work after he is done with Kindergarten.

My fear exactly. I am hoping that Montessori will avoid the potential squashing of my child's love on learning. :

[MattBronsil]

Originally Posted by karne

I wonder what you would hope would happen by sharing this info with your son? I can't imagine a child not "needing improvement" (I hate that phrase) in kindy.....I mean they're in kindy after all! Personally I would assume my child would continue to improve over time, because that's usually a developmental given. If that isn't happening then I think that's a grown=up conversation first, and then a plan would be developed to support the child. But in kindy I think just being in school, getting the routine, etc. is a pretty big deal.

I think a better way to look at it is 3 levels:

introduced
practicing
mastered

Our curriculum goes over a 3 year period, from ages 3-6. I always liked having a detailed list of all the materials and concepts in the room. I could mark down and show where the child stands on things.

I think the school may be using the same ideas, but language like "needs improvement" tend to go against that. Maybe just a suggestion of word changes is all that is needed.

[karne]

Originally Posted by MattBronsil

I think a better way to look at it is 3 levels:

introduced
practicing
mastered

Our curriculum goes over a 3 year period, from ages 3-6. I always liked having a detailed list of all the materials and concepts in the room. I could mark down and show where the child stands on things.

I think the school may be using the same ideas, but language like "needs improvement" tend to go against that. Maybe just a suggestion of word changes is all that is needed.

I don't really think that this is the way I would look at it in kindergarden, actually. Or maybe I would if I was really intellectualizing my child's academic developments at the kindergarden age. I would just relax unless a maor developmental issue has arisen and allow my child the luxury of being protected from too much examination. But, that's just me.

[weliveintheforest]

Has he mentioned it, or shown interest in what was on it? If he doesn't seem to care, I probably wouldn't bring it up.

[Toolip]

There is NO WAY that I would share a report card with a kid that little, be it good or bad. I have no memory of any kind of assessment until the third grade which is still WAY too early. It was because of those dumb CTBS tests... :

I would just come home from the conference and say, "your teacher showed me your amazing painting of _____ and the paper where you wrote all you numbers to ___!!"

At the end of the year we got to take home memory books that had a section that showed how we wrote our names at the beginning of the year, middle and end. There were sections like that for numbers etc... It was all very positive and emphasizing progress. I was very proud of all my work and LOVED looking at that book.

I would protect my kiddo from report cards for as long as I could

[mirthfulmum]

Originally Posted by weliveintheforest

Has he mentioned it, or shown interest in what was on it?

No, not at all. I wonder if his teacher or classmates have brought it up though, he hasn't said anything to me about it.

Originally Posted by Toolip

I would protect my kiddo from report cards for as long as I could

[GuildJenn]

It does depend on the child but I think I would say something like "your teacher shared with me her thoughts about how school is going. (Insert specific, positive observations on the GOOD stuff like "she says you are really interested in ___") What do you think about school?"

Maybe he can write his own report card.

[LiamnEmma]

huh. I guess I'm in a minority.

We sit down and look at report cards together, dh, dc and I. We go over the benchmark testing and we look at the grades. We mostly ooh and aah over them and point out the positives but we also do point out areas to work on--these areas generally encompass behavior, and since I spend a couple of hours in each child's class each week, I've always agreed with most of their teachers' assessments of our children. With our dd this year it has been a remarkable experience. She gets almost perfect scores on her benchmark testing, but definitely underachieves in class and tends toward psychosomatic complaints. She has the nicest teacher in the whole world and a long history of the above, so I know it's not the school environment. So we talk honestly about the stuff going on.

I guess I just see grades as that. Grades. Not necessarily a personal thing, but an assessment of your current skills levels in relation to the standards (albeit cuh-razy standards) regulated by the state you're in. My kids don't seem too freaked out by it.

I know my sister doesn't do that though. Her fifth grade daughter just asked to see a report card for the first time this school year. Then again, my sister was totally obsessed with maintaining a perfect GPA from k through 12, which seems thoroughly unhealthy to me and to her and I think she's trying to shield her dds from that.

[mommy68]

Originally Posted by swampwitch

I think I'd take the approach of, "Hey, sweetie, how about we practice writing our letters. Can you show mommy how good you write?" And then you can coach him. I was a kid who was very affected by the disappointment if I wasn't up to standard, so I don't think it is important that he knows what his teacher has put on his report card.

I agree. I take complaints on my kids' behavior or their grades on report cards in the school with a grain of salt anyway. Only 8 more weeks left of school and they will (hopefully) never set foot in a school again. At this age they shouldn't be expected to perform at any level in my opinion. If they are learning then that's great! and hopefully they are enjoying what they learn, which is most important.

[mammastar2]

Last time I read dd (first grade) a couple of nice general comments about it being a pleasure to have her in class.

If I had my way, we wouldn't have/discuss report cards at all at this age, but her teacher talks it up big time, and the poor kid was coming home for two weeks before the report cards hoping she'd get an "A+", and explaining that the teacher was taking home all their stories to see which ones were "A+" stories. It really bites.

Fortunately, she didn't ask about specific grades that she got, since there were no "A+"s on there. How do you tell a six year old they got a C in science?? (apparently she lost interest in the one-on-one assessment somewhere after correctly identifying all body parts, and somewhere before saying what they all did. Yes, she does actually know that legs are for movement, thank you very much!).

:

[kmeyrick]

I wouldn't introduce it as "The report card says your letters need to improve" since he'll take that as not being good enough. But you can work with him on his letters as a way to bond, and he'll never know.