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I think I made a mistake (this is very very long, sorry) - Page 2

post #21 of 26
It just gets to me how childish some ppl can be. Like, seriously, wow you didn't tell her first because she has a big mouth. I think your MIL needs to get over it.
post #22 of 26
I'm sorry you are dealing with this situation. I can see why your MIL was upset that everyone else in the family has known for quite awhile and she did not. She is probably hurt and bewildered why you didn't share the news with them. It sounds like even your "trusted" people started to spill the beans anyway.

Hopefully with a little bit of time, she will work through those feelings and be happy and excited for your pregnancy. Maybe you could send her a card and explain why you didn't tell them right away and apologize for hurting her feelings. That might go a long way in smoothing things over with her.

I hope that you are all able to get past this and enjoy your pregnancy!
post #23 of 26
Thread Starter 
My friend spilled the beans in front of me to another friend. It was an innocent mistake and you should have seen his face! He was so devastated that he was the one to tell someone else. But I told the other friend not to tell anyone and then we told my in-laws that night.

Anyway, MIL is still not talking to me. She has continued to ignore me, won't even say hello or how are you doing. Yesterday, at a large church gathering, DH and I were finally making our way to the restroom (I had to go SO BADLY!) and MIL grabbed DH and said I want to show you something. He told her we were on the way to the restroom, but she didn't care and dragged DH to his uncle. This is one of the weird things she does. I think it makes her feels good to be the one to initiate a conversation between DH and someone else. For example, we were living out of state and came for a visit, instead of hanging out with us, she got one of DH's sisters (who lives in another state) on the phone and made him talk to her. Even though we do own a phone and could have called her when we got back home. Back to the story, she told Uncle that I was 10 weeks pregnant. I was 10 weeks when we originally told her so I corrected and said 12 weeks. She then said, "Finally, after being married for 8 years they are going to have a baby." To me that sounds like we've been TTC for years and had fertility problems. Unlike her, we waited until we felt we were ready for kids. I plan on telling her in a very kind way that that hurt my feelings and to not say it in that way to anyone else. But I'm not going to touch the subject of her hurt feelings, she needs to bring that up, not me.
post #24 of 26
I am not in this DDC, I just pop in to stalk people that used to be in our TTC club but graduated, so I am sorry to intrude. But I just wanted to give you another "You are SOOO not alone!" and a

Very long story, but my MIL is horrible as well. Hubby and I and her are basically not on speaking terms. (We have tried to talk it out, but she just started to ignore us years ago.) Most of it is because of me, I am a horrible, liberal democrat and have corrupted and am now controlling her son. She is so hateful that we are actually glad, like you, that we don't have to deal with her! If I get pregnant, she probably won't find out till the baby is in my arms at some family wedding we both happen to be attending. Because if she doesn't want anything to do with us, she doesn't have a right to know, and can face the consequences of cutting us off.

Sounds like you are already in good company here, but just thought I would throw another story on here to make you feel a little bit better. Hubby and I have spent a lot of anguish on the whole thing, it has taken a lot to "let it go" and live our lives.

I hope things turn out better for you, and I wish you a wonderful pregnancy. You totally have the right to tell who you want, when you want. I hope you don't mind me jumping on your post when I am not in the DDC!
post #25 of 26
My in-laws don't speak to me either, and barely speak to DH. They quit speaking with us when we became pregnant out of wedlock with DS (my FIL is muslim and his step-wife is too, MIL passed away when DH was 12). We were supposed to go see them this summer, but they told DH he had to come alone without me and the kids. They have never met their grandchildren. I know how you feel, but hopefully your situation will resolve soon.
post #26 of 26
Thread Starter 
Jump in anytime, aprilgurlie! Thanks for sharing your experience.
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