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Spots to go nurse when out in public. - Page 5

post #81 of 121
3/31/08 at 7:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by KurumiSophia View Post
Long story short, I need to know some decent spots where I can go nurse DD since apparently I'm not discrete enough (according to DH) even though I keep my shirt pulled down and her head covers the rest. Yes, DD is at a point where she likes to pop off for a minute or so leaving my boob exposed. So when you're out in public (or @ someone's house for that matter.), where do you go to nurse so that you can do it w/o folks seein' the boobs?
Get a hooter hider

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post #82 of 121
3/31/08 at 8:32pm
I'm not sure that your DH is trying to be controlling here. It may be likely that hes embarrassed about what other people think of you breastfeeding in public or in general. Unfortunately BFing is not the cultural norm in US society. My DH was kind of weird about it after one of our male friends came over and was completely weird about it (at our house I was BFing DS in a leather chair situated in front of him and facing the same direction so there was no way he'd see me even but he left the room). I discussed with DH why he thought our friend was weird about it and the next time he was over and I had to nurse I brought up the topic of why it bothered him. He had no real reason and I told him I could care less if he saw boob and I know hes not trying to sneak a peak or anything. I think this helped DH. I also think it helps for them to hear +comments from ppl when NIP.
Hang in there mama
post #83 of 121
3/31/08 at 8:58pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by jenjenl18 View Post
I'm not sure that your DH is trying to be controlling here.
He told her she was being insensitive. Repeatedly!
post #84 of 121
3/31/08 at 8:58pm
No offense, but people who are offended by NIP are probably going to be grossed out that you would go to another room in thier house to do it anyways. I don't think it is the showing of skin that offends but that sick idea that the act is sexual. I probably wouldn't go to thier house even if they did think I hated them or I would go but explain that we couldn't stay more than an hour or so because you didn't want to offend anyone by nursing.

Really people who get offended by nusring just irk me!
post #85 of 121
3/31/08 at 9:40pm
I'm sorry you are going through this. I know this has been mentioned before but try the hooter hider. I love mine! I'm a bit of a prude (for myself, not anyone else) so it makes me more comfortable in public and mixed company. DD doesn't mind it because she can see me. In fact, we sort have a special version of peek a boo. I think DD feels like it is our own private little world when we use the hooter hider. You probably could make one on your own easily if you didn't want to spend so much money on so little fabric.

I know I am only seeing a small snapshot of your husband and your marriage but from what you write, he does sound controlling. I hope this is truly a healthy relationship for you.

Good luck.
post #86 of 121
4/1/08 at 1:50pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaluvs View Post
I'm sorry you are going through this. I know this has been mentioned before but try the hooter hider. I love mine! I'm a bit of a prude (for myself, not anyone else) so it makes me more comfortable in public and mixed company. DD doesn't mind it because she can see me. In fact, we sort have a special version of peek a boo. I think DD feels like it is our own private little world when we use the hooter hider. You probably could make one on your own easily if you didn't want to spend so much money on so little fabric.

I know I am only seeing a small snapshot of your husband and your marriage but from what you write, he does sound controlling. I hope this is truly a healthy relationship for you.

Good luck.
This is just a small bit. He's a loving father and husband. Due to some things that happened earlier in our relationship that are my fault, he's a bit uptight about my body.

After some deep thought, I'm debating just NIP as per normal. I've already done as I wish to feed her for 6m, what's another 6m at least, if not a year and a half.

You ladies have all given me some food for thought that I'm chewing over and mulling. Ty
post #87 of 121
4/1/08 at 2:45pm
I am a big introvert and don't feel comfortable nursing in public unless I'm covered up. I just use a big receiving blanket (DS's swaddles actually) and try to find a quiet spot with few people around. I am getting better with DS2 then I was with DS1. I am most uncomfortable around people I know and always find an empty room and close the door. No one is offended that I leave nor would they care if I stayed, but for me I am more comfortable. DH could care less either way so I am lucky.
post #88 of 121
4/1/08 at 3:33pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by KurumiSophia View Post
I just got a Mei Tai in the mail today which I adore but am not sure how to nurse in.



Thus wondering where to go, besides bathrooms, of course.

Use it as a cover up if you c/n wrestle your breast into the baby's mouth while s/he is riding in it.

For us, I always felt like a draped receiving blanket, etc., was the same as wearing a neon sign that said "I'M NURSING A BABY OVER HERE!" While the colorful cover-ups they have now (Hooter Hiders?) are prettier than those things Target sells that look like lead aprons, I still think that they are less discreet than just sitting, cuddling/nursing a baby.

Just my opinion.


PLEASE, never in a bathroom...would you eat lunch sitting on a public toilet??
post #89 of 121
4/1/08 at 3:45pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by lesmac View Post
Use it as a cover up if you c/n wrestle your breast into the baby's mouth while s/he is riding in it.

For us, I always felt like a draped receiving blanket, etc., was the same as wearing a neon sign that said "I'M NURSING A BABY OVER HERE!" While the colorful cover-ups they have now (Hooter Hiders?) are prettier than those things Target sells that look like lead aprons, I still think that they are less discreet than just sitting, cuddling/nursing a baby.

Just my opinion.


PLEASE, never in a bathroom...would you eat lunch sitting on a public toilet??
Not one of my prouder moments, but yes I have when I was working and only had like a 15 min. lunch break and I had to use the bathroom and was starving. I'd snag my lunch start towards the bathrooms eating, finish while I was on the toilet and back to my station to clock back on.
post #90 of 121
4/1/08 at 3:52pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by _betsy_ View Post
You said they are religious? What do they think Jesus ate?
My husband used this line on Christmas Eve a couple of years ago; our mothers would have had fits if they heard him.

And I agree, I doubt that anyone is truly staring at you, hoping you flash them.

But to answer the original question, and I'm not sure whether it's available to you or not, but Nordstrom has a FANTASTIC ladies lounge. Both in VA & MI, this is a mecca for nursing moms.
post #91 of 121
4/1/08 at 3:55pm
Here is (I think) a much prettier option than a hooter hider, if you decide you are looking for a cover.

http://www.lovedbaby.com/nursingshawls.html
post #92 of 121
4/1/08 at 4:00pm
Armchair psychology moment:

I'm thinking that since this is a fairly new issue, that it's somehow connected to his discomfort of your decision to nurse DD until her 2nd birthday. I wonder if he's working through his issues indirectly by taking what were perhaps innocuous comments and hearing them much larger in his head...that his own issues have magnified the discomfort that other people feel and that it's his awkward way of trying to navigate his complex emotions about extending breastfeeding.

Just a random thought.
post #93 of 121
4/1/08 at 4:42pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by KurumiSophia View Post
This is just a small bit. He's a loving father and husband. Due to some things that happened earlier in our relationship that are my fault, he's a bit uptight about my body.
It sounds like you and your husband need to come to terms with what happened in the past, and leaving it there. Your body belongs to you and you only - he doesn't get to make decisions about it, especially ones that seem based in jealousy and petty revenge that affects not only you, but your daughter. I know he's your husband and you love him, but he needs to leave the past in the past.
post #94 of 121
4/2/08 at 2:04am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SophieAnn View Post
Here is (I think) a much prettier option than a hooter hider, if you decide you are looking for a cover.

http://www.lovedbaby.com/nursingshawls.html
OH, those are nice too, if you like something more reserve, or if your baby doesn't overheat easy.
I liked the funky prints on the hooter hiders and it allowed for more circulation for my sweaty boy!
post #95 of 121
4/2/08 at 9:30am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Turkish Kate View Post
I'm gonna be brutally honest--my tact meter is broken today. Your husband is the problem, not you or your friends or family. Your husband should grow a pair and stand up for his wife and child. Rather than telling you that you need to be sensitive to the feelings of others, he should start being a little more sensitive to yours. Real men don't send their wives to hide in the bathroom to feed their babies. And you can tell him I said that, too. :P
post #96 of 121
4/2/08 at 9:36am
Quote:
Originally Posted by KurumiSophia View Post
It's what I keep telling him but he says it's "insensitive" and that I need to learn to filter my actions and words more because I have been offensive in how I bf because other people aren't as comfortable w/it as I am.

So thus wondering where the good spots are to go bf her before rejoining the world at large.
So....it's insensitive for you to feed your baby, but it's perfectly normal and acceptable for everyone in the room to gawk at your breasts? :
post #97 of 121
4/2/08 at 10:38am
No offense, but finding a place to be discreet is just plain common sense.
In someone's place, ask for a room.
In public, look for a quiet area away from the fray- a bench, a nursing room, a changing room, etc. Never a bathroom, I might add.
Barring that, there are nursing shawls.
The thing is, if YOU are comfortable doing it the way you have been, then do it that way.
ITA with other pps who say that you should talk to the people who are supposedly so offended. I bet you they are not nearly as offended as your DH makes them out to be. It's obviously his problem.
He needs to get over it.
YOUR breasts are meant to feed YOUR child. Period.
Your child comes first and if others are that uncomfortable around you when bfing, then maybe you need to not be around them until your DD is weaned.
post #98 of 121
4/2/08 at 10:40am
Quote:
Originally Posted by WilliamsMama View Post
No offense, but finding a place to be discreet is just plain common sense.
In someone's place, ask for a room.
In public, look for a quiet area away from the fray- a bench, a nursing room, a changing room, etc. Never a bathroom, I might add.
Barring that, there are nursing shawls.
Are you kidding me? No it is not common sense. It is common sense to treat NIP as normal and nothing to be "discreet" about or to hide.
post #99 of 121
4/2/08 at 10:44am
:
post #100 of 121
4/2/08 at 10:45am
Quote:
Originally Posted by the_lissa View Post
Are you kidding me? No it is not common sense. It is common sense to treat NIP as normal and nothing to be "discreet" about or to hide.
I think she meant how to go about it if it's what mom wants to do...

I was taken aback for a moment too.

-Angela
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