I think it can be an age and stage and I know how exhausting this can be. I have chosen to not do alarms or internet screens but be there myself and I also have a husband who I ask to help.
As pp have shared, I looked deeper. My dd , now nearly 15 is very adventuresome and active and a risk taker. I tried my best to channel her energy (and still do) in positive ways while constantly supervising , guiding, being aware,and protecting.
This is a big reason why we are moving next month to an apartment in town where it will not take so long to get to activities. This apartment has a 24 hour gym, a beautiful pool, is on a bus line. It will be 15 minutes from the high school where she will play volleyball, 15 minutes from voice, and 5 minutes from shopping and movies. It will also be close to volunteer activities with animals, her passion plus is 15 minutes from our church.We will be close to food shopping which is now 30-40 min. away one way. Currently everything is 35-55 minutes one way drive.Plus it will be a 15 min. commute for dh vs. one hour. We will still have our country place which is close to the springs.
Some things I did and she never really snuck out but was around kids that did. This has pretty much passed but it was very stressful during that time. I would set firm boundaries. I would take the phone at night and the computer. I tried to make sure that there were many fun activities. I often offered to take kids to outings and occasionally did and my dh did often.I tried to remain as positive as possible and listen and tune in to her .
Outlets for her include volleyball, voice lessons and lots of positive family time. Like right now, she is planning to go to the springs.All of this takes much parental time and sacrifice. Today, dh will help.
I think being a present positive parent with firm limits is essential. I had to remind myself my dd was 13 ,14 going on 25 plus and had to and stlil do be the positive mom guiding with limits that are for her self protection. Even though starting at 13 many thought she was in college.
She wants naturally autonomy, power, and expression, and fun. She is very high energy and the challenge is to balance that with her personality plus realastic developmental level.
To me, 13, 14 and being 18,19, 20 is a huge leap.
Sallie
As pp have shared, I looked deeper. My dd , now nearly 15 is very adventuresome and active and a risk taker. I tried my best to channel her energy (and still do) in positive ways while constantly supervising , guiding, being aware,and protecting.
This is a big reason why we are moving next month to an apartment in town where it will not take so long to get to activities. This apartment has a 24 hour gym, a beautiful pool, is on a bus line. It will be 15 minutes from the high school where she will play volleyball, 15 minutes from voice, and 5 minutes from shopping and movies. It will also be close to volunteer activities with animals, her passion plus is 15 minutes from our church.We will be close to food shopping which is now 30-40 min. away one way. Currently everything is 35-55 minutes one way drive.Plus it will be a 15 min. commute for dh vs. one hour. We will still have our country place which is close to the springs.
Some things I did and she never really snuck out but was around kids that did. This has pretty much passed but it was very stressful during that time. I would set firm boundaries. I would take the phone at night and the computer. I tried to make sure that there were many fun activities. I often offered to take kids to outings and occasionally did and my dh did often.I tried to remain as positive as possible and listen and tune in to her .
Outlets for her include volleyball, voice lessons and lots of positive family time. Like right now, she is planning to go to the springs.All of this takes much parental time and sacrifice. Today, dh will help.
I think being a present positive parent with firm limits is essential. I had to remind myself my dd was 13 ,14 going on 25 plus and had to and stlil do be the positive mom guiding with limits that are for her self protection. Even though starting at 13 many thought she was in college.
She wants naturally autonomy, power, and expression, and fun. She is very high energy and the challenge is to balance that with her personality plus realastic developmental level.
To me, 13, 14 and being 18,19, 20 is a huge leap.
Sallie
