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anyone wanna join my toy-free tribe? - Page 6

post #101 of 196
I've been lurking for a while and finally decided to sub. I agree with many of the posts that I've seen so far and while we won't be completely toy-free, I have been extremely selective of what toys have been (and will be) brought into the house. Although I do feel a slight luxury in being able to start with all of this before the first baby is born (due end of July) and not having to have toys "disappear".

I think the issues with excessive lead in kids toys is going to be my "in" point, at least with the in-laws. If I can use that as a justification for our choices (and reasoning) to them maybe they'll follow. However, these are still the people who gave both DH and I "things" for Christmas rather than the gift certs. that we had asked for (for our new house) because "it's no fun if you don't have things under the tree to unwrap" . So we'll see how it goes.

I also really liked the idea for a toy-free party and I'm really impressed to see how well it worked out! I'll probably try that once the baby gets here too. Thanks for the idea!
post #102 of 196
yeah, the lead issue is big with toys, and for clothes, talking about formaldehyde and stuff has been helpful. now everyone is 'on board' with the organics.
post #103 of 196
Originally Posted by mumkenna&lucas View Post
..a toy gun that has disappeared already, a ton of plastic cars and a giant plastic car to store them in, a bunch of plastic dollar store sippy cups, and a skateboard.
a gun and a skateboard!?! for a 3 year old? Yikes. Good to hear it worked out with one side of the family though - that's a start for sure! I'm going to keep your wording in mind when we have to deal with parties and family events... People know our preference for organics/natural fiber but tend to ignore it & justify with "but I couldn't find a natural material that was so easy to clean" or something ...

Well, my baby is *almost* 48 hours old and we're still toy free Not exactly a huge accomplishment but we've gotta start somewhere
post #104 of 196
Awww, congrats on your new little one!!!
post #105 of 196
xekomaya: How sweet! Congratulations!

Here are my recent thoughts . . .
(1) More than even my DC going along with at least LESS toys, I think it's important that your DP share your mindset. I feel like I might have to wake up in the middle of the night to get rid of what no one plays with so that even DH won't see!
(2) I brought some toys down to the basement for our upcoming garage sale. The kids found it the next day, and of course, wanted to bring it back upstairs. True to form, they played with the toys for a few MINUTES and that was that. It's going back down again and then out the door.
(3) DD got some high quality wooden toys (or at least expensive) from relatives for her b-day. Within the first week, 3 of the toys had some broken pieces! Ack. One piece was broken right out of the box, and my girls are not hard on toys at all when they do play with them. My relatives really do try VERY hard to buy the kids nice things when they buy, but I wish I could just say, seriously . . .no more.
(4) I look around our playroom and see that most of the toys we have are gifts. I wish I could go back to the giftgivers and give them the money back they spent.
post #106 of 196
What brand of toys were they? (The expensive broken ones.)
post #107 of 196
Mizelenius- my DH is the same way. I got him onboard with getting rid of a few toys that DS isn't interested in. I sorted out the toys while he was at work, and then mentioned to him that there was a pile of toys for goodwill. He suddenly decides these are perfectly good toys, and why would we get rid of them when DS LOVES them! LOL, he loves them for 10 seconds when you dangle it in front of his face. He loves anything for 10 seconds. So they are still going out, but under protest from DH.

I have a constant battle against DH about stuff in general. I don't know why (we both grew up poor) but DH won't get rid of anything that still has *some* use left in it- so he ends up with a closet full of junk tshirts with stains because he could always use them for yardwork. When we started dating he ahd hot pink gym shorts that his mom had bought for him that he ahd never worn (because you know, they were pink) but since they were perfectly good he couldn't just throw them away.

That is totally off topic, but I have to fight through DH to get rid of DS's toys.
post #108 of 196
We had a mom-2-mom sale last weekend and got rid of so many toys! It feels so great to have all of that stuff out of our lives. And now that there is less in her room, I see her playing much more "imaginatively" (I dont think that is a word. ) Lately, her favorite "toy" has been her flower hair clips.

Oh, and we are about to move across the state, so packing up her room has been a piece of cake!
post #109 of 196
hi. i like this thread. after reading a little i said to my dd lets go into your room and look for toys you dontplay with to give away she was all game but i thought of one doll and that was it. my kids play with what we have. which is much less than everyone we know in america but seems like more than everyone we know here in Israel.

the only thing ty really dont play with are their drawer of puppets and the puppet theater it is not such a big one to really take up space. bu they are such "creative" toys that i dont want to get rid of them. thoughts? they really hardly ever ever play with tham.

ETA did the OP ever come back? i read the first few pages and the last but not the middle.
post #110 of 196
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by gilamama View Post

ETA did the OP ever come back? i read the first few pages and the last but not the middle.
Yes, I'm here, very grateful for everybody's insight and input, and still toy-free at four months!!!

I guess that's not technically true, since we still have the beautiful cherry wood rattle he doesn't use (yet) and I did some closet decluttering and realized just how much I had saved from my older kids' childhoods. Most of it wound up going to the dump this time around, largely because I don't want Terran to become a toy- addict but also because I was just plain ready to let go of it. I didn't see "Jeanita's orangutan" any more, I saw a worn piece of fake fur with stuffing falling out of it. THose aren't "Christopher's Power Rangers" at all and they never were; they're just hunks of plastic invisibly offgassing.

It's nice to have a less cluttered house and room in the closets for things we actually use.

I'll really be needing the support when I have to refuse gifts, but that hasn't happened yet. I do know that if I had kept the "memory boxes", I would have needed to rent a storage room by now and probably would have needed to put Terran in daycare to pay for it.
post #111 of 196

Originally Posted by noordinaryspider View Post
Yes, I'm here, very grateful for everybody's insight and input, and still toy-free at four months!!!

We're doing okay here at 3 weeks. People are starting to give him lots of stuffed animals that need to find a new home along with the bottles & paci's from diaper cakes that showed up after he was born..

Does anyone ever struggle with liking a toy more than your child? Wyatt received a stuffed giraffe that is just so darn cute I'm having a hard time getting rid of it. I am going to, with the rest of them, but I know this isn't the last time this will come up. What do you do?
post #112 of 196
I am lucky that 2 friends of mine are pregnant, and I left the tags on a lot of the stuffed animals DS got, so they are being regifted! (I tell people when I regift- that way they won't feel bad about tossing them if they want to).

DS did get this really cute stuffed lion that a good friend of mine lovingly picked out, that he doesn't care for- what to do? I don't know.

I am really struggling right now with toys/animals from when I was a kid. My mom saved about 5 dolls and animals, and they are not in great shape (played with a lot) and I feel bad tossing them- but what are we ever going to do with my nasty looking plastic doll that feels sticky no matter how much I scrub at it? I wouldn't want DS playing with it. It is collecting dust on a shelf in his room right now. I guess I know the answer after reading what I typed- it all needs to go to either the trash or my mom's house if she wants it.
post #113 of 196
I'll join this! DS is due Aug. 1 and while we're not planning on being COMPLETELY toy-free, we have some pretty strict guidelines on what's allowed and what isn't.
post #114 of 196
Thread Starter 
i'm starting to notice how gentle ds's hands are; he doesn't "bat at" toys or try to "grab" them, the way his agemates are described as doing. such violent words! since ds is more likely to touch something that has nerve endings than not, his developmental milestone is expressing itself as wanting to hold my finger, rub or gently pat my cheeks, or catch my braid and give it a light tug to get my attention.

i am finding that people just "don't get it" irl, so i'm going to have to come up with some stratgies for avoiding unwanted gifts. I was bragging about his gentle hands to a childless coworker who is particularly fond of him and mentioning that I thought it was because we don't do toys, and she rep[lied, incredulously, "But what about wooden ones? They're okay, aren't they?" and another friend who is definitely in the "toy light" camp was teasing me about "protecting him from the dangerous evil toys".

I'm used to being the weirdo by now. So far my little radical experiment is a success and my four month old is a delightful baby instead of a "consumer".
post #115 of 196
I'm so fascinated to hear all of this... it's nice to hear about families making efforts to help our children avoid catching the consuming/materialism sickness that plagues us! I'm gonna join you in this movemenr as soon as my little one arrives.

post #116 of 196
dh and I were talking about doing a sweep and getting rid of most of our toys, or at least putting them in boxes in the garage at first. They just clutter up our house and dd barely plays with them! She mostly plays with her dollhouse, tea set and stuffed animals
post #117 of 196
Limiting toys is a great first step. You will be surprised at how much of your money and time you have spent on toys - thinking about them, worrying about safety, stepping on them, picking them up, arguing about appropriateness (with older children/grandparents/spouses), finding places to put them away, organizing, etc.

This is all time you could spend with your children.

I had different reasons coming into this than the op but her posts have been very thought provoking.
post #118 of 196
i struggle cuz at my place we only have wooden toys or soft things to play with. lots of outdoor play and she attends montessori. ocassional dvd's, no tv, no movies in theater. but at her dad's house it's a free for all so it's hard to keep it under control especially when he sneaks crap into her backpack.
post #119 of 196
i'm really happy with our minimalism.

i still haven't purchased a single thing for the baby. so far, we have one onsie and one gown thingy. our baby shower is on Sunday, and most of whta i chose were only the things that i wanted. I don't know what i'm going to get, but i think it's going to work out well.

as far as i can tell, no one has purchased any toys at all. so, that's great.
post #120 of 196
I know someone IRL who literally has NO toys and boys ages 13,8,6,2. They are the most imaginitve creative boys I have ever met.

They spend their days in the garden leaarning about worms, and composting, and growing....playing with sticks (there is NO limit with sticks!) and making little toys out of paper and modeling clay.

I have honestly never met such happy kids in my life.

I am seriously considering going "no toy"

Not sure if I will be 100% yet but who knows! I plan to let it evolve, as it already has begun.

The other day my ds made a "web" in the backyard with a roll of string I gave him, he is 5. He also has started findign wood to play with in the garagge.
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