safe co-sleeping rules - do you break them? - Page 3

[dex_millie]

Originally Posted by lilmissimpatient@c

Erm...I think we broke all the rules everyday. DD slept between DH and I, under a blanket pulled up to her middle, and he and I both used pillows.

:

I know a broke them. Infact just letting DS sleep on his stomach is one and he has been doing it since 5 days old. I always had the comforters and pillows on the bed, never removed them. In the early months though I used a separate blanket for him. Not to mention, when he wakes at night I just latch him on and drift back into "la la land".

[Mama Poot]

I've broken them all, even some bad ones, and my children are just fine. No, honestly some of them are ridiculous. I'm expected to wrap my kid in a million layers of clothes along with myself to stay warm because blankets aren't safe? Sorry, ain't happening. I think its dangerous for babies to wear much more than a diaper to bed during hot weather-and even in cooler weather it gets horribly uncomfortably hot when you've got two adults and a baby in the same bed. No one is going to be too cold, that's for sure.
I also use pillows. Seriously-I'm expected to sleep with no pillow? I wouldn't even be able to fall asleep and if I was able to, they'd have to haul me out on a stretcher and take me straight to the chiro. Besides, the baby is never near the pillow anyway!
I don't drink, however I do smoke and do not always wash my hands and face before coming to bed (and I normally have a smoke before bed). I do not smoke in the house and my children are not exposed to second hand smoke, so I'm really not concerned about it. I've heard about babies being affected by inhaling my breath after I smoke, but I haven't read any hard facts about this being a serious threat.

[pianojazzgirl]

Another rule breaker here!

Pillows? - check!
Blankets? - check!
Baby naps alone on bed with pillows to stop him from rolling off? - check!

[WildinTheory]

We break them. I was too scared to co-sleep for anything more a few hours at a time until DS was almost 9 months old. At the point I was due to go back to work in 4 weeks and terrified that I would be sleepwalking through my life. At that point I sidecarred the crib next to our bed and gave DS a double mattress on his floor. Honestly, it was the best thing I ever did. DS even has a down comforter on his bed. It is never up higher than his waist and his pillow is his security item. (His room is right off the living room and he's only there for short naps and a few hours before I bring him into our bed.

In our bed we totally use both pillows and blankets and he has a small blanket in the crib. For the first few months of this arrangement I was sure I was the most irresponsible mama on earth but it's worked really well for our family.

[RosemaryS-F]

[QUOTE=wondertwins;10963549]Yes, we're rule breakers. I guess I didn't comprehend that the "no pillows" rule went for adults, as well as babes.]

me either! this hread is a great relief to me.

[Rippette]

Oh yeah, we broke the rules.

He sleeps with the covers on him some times, we sleep with pillows (even though he sleeps on the mattress), and when he naps I put a pillow next to him and a rail on the other side. We do have our king mattress and box springs on the floor though.

One thing I feel that is important if your going to let them take naps in you bed is to teach them (asap-when they're crawling) how to turn around and slide off the bed on thier tummy. Once he learned how to do that, I felt much better. Oh, and we get off the bed every morning that way for practice.

[starsrmndmeofyou]

oh ya we break them- i sleep with pillows (she sleeps on the mattress) with covers, and she sleeps on the edge in the crook of my arm (she doesnt roll over yet) and we have a co-sleeper next to me and her.

i feel better with her next to me. even in the co-sleeper i dont feel secure - what can i say? we both sleep better that way~

[Writerbird]

For the first month, I couldn't have nursed him in bed without a heap of pillows. Now that we've mastered side lying, I'm down to two pillows

[mom4peace]

We have pillows and a down comforter, however it's only up to his waist. A lot of times ds and I sleep with our own blanket. DH is a heavier sleeper, so ds normally does sleep next to me.

[AGierald]

omg thank you sooo much for making me feel better about breaking the rules, lol! ds sleeps in between dh and i, in my arm, on his side, because i think he has reflux and he doesnt like to sleep on his back... we both use pillows (pushed away from the baby) and a blanket that the baby shares with me, and my cat sleeps at the foot of the bed, lol.

[ChetMC]

Rule Breakers

We used blankets, but we live in an older home with literally no insulation and it's cold in the winter. We had pillows. Both of our girls also slept on their tummies. We let our toddler sleep with the baby. The mattress was very firm, but it had a pillow top so it wasn't as rigid as a crib mattress.

The one rule I would never break was alcohol or medication. Neither DH or I ever consumed anything that would cause us to sleep more soundly, or be less aware than normal.

[aylaanne]

We have a pillow-top mattress, DH and I have two pillows each, and we all have blankets. I do have a bed rail and DS has his own blanket, but more because he sleeps with his face at my nipple line, and I need a blanket over my shoulders. I do break the alcohol rule, but we're usually pretty sober by the time we go to bed, anyways. And DH is on a lot of meds for sleep and such, so usually DS is on the outside of me. When I'm working, DH and DS share the bed together.

I'm starting to think about transitioning DS to his crib, but that's mostly because I want to cuddle with DH.

[eastmillcreekmama]

My DD was always a side sleeper, even when she was really small, and I live in a yurt, which is basically an uninsulated tent, so much too cold to leave her uncovered. We have a down comforter with a duvet, and A LOT of pillows. She was always covered up to her chin (though she has always liked to kick the covers off). our bed is in a loft, to boot, though it has a solid and safely spaced railing. We leave her up there alone. SHe's never more than 10 feet away from us. And I sleep on the couch with her. And she sleeps inbetween DH and I. I mean, after the first few nights, my and DH's awareness of her is always solid. If she is squirming, I wake up.

Whatever, I don't care what the rules say, the safest place for DD is sleeping right next to me!

[AllisonR]

We haven't broken any rules, as these are my rules:
1. No getting drunk or high or stupid and then sleeping with baby
2. Never wake a sleeping baby (but a cuddle and a kiss is OK)

Slightly off topic: I hate that some "safe recommendations" are that only teh mother should sleep next to baby, because father can't possibly be as attunded to his child as mother. What baloney. Depends on the person of course! In our house, DH sleeps next to DD, and has done so since she stopped BF, and he is totally in sync with her, while I am snoring away. Also, The NCSS, which is a fine book imo, has the whole first chapter dedicated to safe co-sleeping. The most boring, cover my a** pile of manure I have ever read. DD hates blankets, sheets and duvets, so I don't need to worry about her being under them!

[Hazelnut]

I think I started out thinking I had to sleep with no blankets and pillows and the cat locked in the kitchen. I read all those rules and agree that they are over the top, even though basic safety is important. Though I think what is basic to us might not be so obvious to people unfamiliar with co-sleeping, who are used to 50 pillows, big fluffy comforters, beds high off the ground, and too many pharmaceuticals in their bathroom.

My rules are basic: no medication or alcohol before bed ( I do drink a glass of vino with dinner usually), and I try to keep the blankets at our waist and one firm pillow out of his way. I dress warm enough so that I won't pull the blankets up, but he'd holler if I did anyway. My husband will shimmy down for the same reason. When he was brand new I think I was more careful, or rather just more paranoid.

I think the main danger is rolling out of the bed. Ours is on the floor and is a pretty flat mattress though, so that 'danger' isn't too dangerous.

[Benji'sMom]

I didn't break any of them, I don't think.

[koalove]

when ds was a baby, i did break the rules, but i was so nervous about it i slept very little. i was scared he would be cold. i was scared of drowning him in blankies. i was terrified of him falling down the crack but too scared to put a pillow in there to prevent it. geeeeeezzzzzzz im glad thats over! i agree, you would have to be in a coma to not know your child is suffocating in the covers, but it does happen and i wonder if the mamas of those babies thought the same thing. and i doubt the mamas of those babies were all passed out drunk or whatever. its a tough one. you gotta be comfy enough to sleep but safe too. i love those sleep sacks~ baby doesnt need a blankie at all with those but lets face it, the kiddos have to get in the covers when they are nursing all night non stop!

[barefootpoetry]

The only rule I don't break is not going to bed impaired/intoxicated. I'd hate to think what would happen if DS woke up and needed me and I was too drunk/doped up on cough medicine/etc. to know.

We never took the pillows or blankets out of bed. How on earth could anyone sleep without pillows and blankets?!? DS and I usually sleep alone since DH works graveyard shift and sleeps during the day, so when he was small I just had my own pillow in bed and kept the duvet on my side of the bed, and DS laid on the other side swaddled or underneath his own small blanket. When he got to about 1 year old I let him "graduate" to using a pillow and sharing the duvet with me. There's been a few times where I've woken up and it's been over his face, and I panic, but it obviously didn't smother him, and it never smothered DH either who sometimes sleeps with it over his face too.

I've totally let DS sleep on his tummy too. And we took forever to get a bed rail, so he fell out of bed numerous times. :

[goodheartedmama]

I let my dachsies sleep in bed with us, I use a pillow, although I didn't for the first month or so. I sleep with 2 kids in my bed (soon to be 3)--not next to each other, though. We only used a sheet for the first couple of months, but now I use plenty of blankets.