Modest Dressing Mommas - Page 5

[CharlieBrown]

I dress modestly. So do my children, including 4 yo son.

[Parthenia]

: I dress modestly.
I have one pair of jeans, but my other pants are big baggy patchy cords that I wear in winter. In cold weather I wear long skirts. In warm weather I wear shorter skirts that go below the knee so they don't get tangled in my bike. Occasionally I wear capris, but no shorts. I mostly wear 3/4 length or longer sleeves year round. I have a couple shorter sleeve tee shirts.

I cover my head, but for practical reasons. I have really long, heavy hair, and scarves and hair wraps keep my hair out of the way.

[Kidzaplenty]

Hi! I am a modest dressing MOMYS.

FTR, my idea of modest is nothing overly tight or revealing. I will wear short sleeved shirts, and SOMETIMES (although very rarely, and usually only when REALLY hot) a sleveless shirt, but never anything that can not be worn without a bra (so no speghetti straps, strapless, or backless). I MAY wear shorts, but only longer shorts (and those, again, only if REALLY hot, and only around my house and yard).

I prefer to wear LONG skirts, ankle lenghth (my preference, not an "obligation"). I will wear dresses that are calf lenghth and I will wear jeans.

My basic "standards" for modesty that I and my family adhere to:
Shorts, only if longer than the tips of your fingers.
Shirts, that you can conceal a bra under and will not show belly when arms are lifted above your head.
Skirts, that come below the kneecap when sitting, at least.
Pants, that are waste high (no really low cut, or bagging so they fall off), and not overly tight.
Bathing suits, one piece unless it is more of a shirt/shorts combo kind, and is not "high cut on bottom" or "low cut on top".
And my girls wear bras as soon as they begin to show. (I know that is a big thing here, but we are a "little" on the bigger side so it looks much nicer when we have them on.)


My girls (including me) do not cut hair shorter than shoulder length (conviction), we believe girls should look like "girls".
My boys do not have hair longer than shoulder length - not really a conviction, but a standard based on beliefs as well as practicallity-DH, and my boys have very "wirey" hair, more like AA hair so it "afros" if it gets long and looks really horrible.


I don't force my beliefs on others, nor do I look down on someone that is dressed differently. Even for my girls, it is not a burden that I "force" on them, it is just a standard that I have always believed and they have picked it up by watching my example over the years.

Anyways, just wanted to introduce myself a bit.

[holyhelianthus]

Hey Jenny! You know how I love to have you around Glad to see you here.

[ghostlykisses]

Hi there, another modest dressing Momma here.

I have gone through different phases of modesty since I became convicted about the way I dressed. When I was a teen and young adult I dressed sexy often. Short shorts, cleavage, the whole nine yards.

In my early 20's I felt I needed to change my dress and went in the total opposite direction of where I had been. I was wearing some pretty frumpy stuff. My poor DH was horrified.

I slowly found my own standard of modesty and style. Mostly long skirts and shirts that were not too low cut. I really like "hippy" patchwork skirts and a t-shirt. I like ankle length skirts best but I have a couple that are just below my knee. Knee length is as short as I go.

I have recently added capris back into my DD's and I's wardobes. I do not like how shorts look on women or girls, it is a personal choice so we just do not go there. I will wear a pair of my husbands at home to garden or work out but not in public.

I wear tank tops as long as they do not show unneeded cleavage. I also wear some more form fitted t-shirts because while I want to be modest I do not want to look frumpy and baggy shirts make me look like I am really over weight because I have a larger chest and it makes the shirt hang off me like a tent.

I have the same standards for my DD who is 8. I have been teaching her about modesty since she was quite small so she is used to it and has no problem with it. I really have never had a time when she has complained or asked for something that was not modest. She does ask at times for jeans which I do not love but I will let her wear if they are modest and not too low cut or tight. I do not want her to be a a sexual object.

It's good to hear that there are so many modest ladies from all backgrounds who are choosing to go against the grain and dress more modestly than mainstream culture wants us to.

[jimblejamble]

Hey, I don't know how you ladies feel about swimwear but I usually dread this time of year because I can never find a cute bathing suit. All the "modest" ones are modest on top with thick straps and higher cuts, but the bottoms still show off too much leg (that, and, ahem, I don't wax ) and I get discouraged. But I just found this website with has swimming shorts & skirts and thought some of you would be interested.

http://www.athleta.com/jump.jsp?item...=475&viewall=1

There's also this site:

http://ohanaswimwear.com/

[Moonprysm]

Does anybody know where to find a modest plus size swim suit that doesn't cost $100??? Holy cow. I may just have to stay out of the water this year.

[Moonprysm]

Ok mamas, I need your help! I need modest maternity shirts/skirts/dresses patterns, BUT I need plus size. I'm having a REALLY hard time finding anything, so help would be great! (and for dresses, they really need to have a nursing option so that I don't get caught in a position where I can't nurse DS if we're out somewhere and he gets tired).

[phathui5]

For some reason, I would love to cover my hair, but no one really does around here, so I haven't done so yet, it'll take more courage on my part.

I started this a few months ago and it's a very comfortable thing for me. I cover with a scarf or bandana. There are some Jewish women around here and some headcovering Mennonites, so it's not just me (though it's still not common).

I seem to remember someone talking about daughters and modesty here. When do you think we should start dressing our daughters modestly? I have 3 little girls and I have a hard time with this.

I've always dressed my daughter modestly. As she gets older, I give explanations about why I have her wear some things. "We put shorts under your dress so you can play without people seeing your underwear." For me, I think starting out this way has kept her from feeling like it's a restriction and more that it's just the way we dress in our family.

[jimblejamble]

Moonprysm, here's a tutorial on adding a drop-front to your dress for nursing. It's on a Regency-era dress but it should be very easy to adapt to any dress pattern. Hope this helps!

http://www.sensibility.com/pattern/dropfront/index.htm

[monkeyscience]

Originally Posted by JessicaRenee

There's also this site:

http://ohanaswimwear.com/

Oh my gosh! Swimming suits with LEGS! Jessica, you are my hero. If I end up moving to Hawai'i, I'm definitely going to save the money for one of those! I really love the Molokai one - it has a modest tanktop so I can still get some sun on areas of my body that are actually exposed when I'm not wearing a swimsuit, but no more worrying about the bottom half!

Thanks for the link!

[nurnur]

couldn't sleep and then stumbled....or was lead here. Im an LDS mama and try to follow modest standards, I don't do tank tops or shorts, nothing too sexy or revealing. I think this is a good place for me to be since I need the influence of others who are living and teaching modesty to their families. I have twin 8 yo girls who want to be at the height of fashion, this time of year I dread taking them into any store that has clothing. They have many friends from school and the neighborhood who wear things we don't and they sometimes think it is "so unfair".

[Gabesgrrrl]

Not sure why this bothers me....

Hi everyone,
hmmm....I read some of these posts, (not all of them-there are a LOT!) and have something similar to chat about:

I live in Canada, and live in a largely Muslim area. I'm NOT muslim, and have no issues with modest dress, (actually LOVE head coverings!) though I wouldn't say I would classify myself as such...

But: Here's the thing: I have SUCH a tough time with the Muslim dress that only leaves the very little slot for the eyes.

I know I'm an American, and there are cultural beliefs I'm sure I hold without realizing it-but I strongly am against women dressing in such a way as it feels to me like it removes their identity-and that they're hiding something...I have respectfully approached and spoken with one woman in such a garment, and learned a lot-but she contradicted her "free" choice by saying:" My husband lets me wear anything I want to when we're at home-even pants!"...

I'd love to hear others thoughts on this, and am open to gentle discussion about the topic, as I don't want to offend or insult anyone and their beliefs-I'm just human, and this is the one thing I can't seem to work through by myself!

Thanks for listening, and for any future responses.

Marcie

[neveryoumindthere]

I'll bite
I know there is at least one sister (Nabbe) on MDC who wears the face veil/niqab, so she may be better able to answer, but I'll try anyway.

I did wear it for a few months, but unfortunately found I wasn't strong enough to handle all the stares and comments and general mean-ness of ppl..

Anyway, the muslim woman wearing the face veil is not hiding her identity. That is *part* of some muslim womens' identity. To be recognized as a practicing muslimah. It's just another level of modesty. The face is a place of beauty, and many women choose to cover it. Many women at the time of the Prophet Mohammed (peace and blessings be upon him) wore the face veil.

As for whether or not it's obligatory, there are 2 scholarly opinions. One is that is mustahabb(strongly preferred/liked) for a woman to cover her face, and the other is that it is obligatory. I struggle(d) with this for years because both sides have strong evidence from both the Qur'an and Sunnah(teachings/sayings/actions approved of by the Prophet)

I know sisters in both camps. Most of them though wear it because they feel it is strongly preferred and they feel more comfortable and protected covering their face in front of unrelated males. If you were in some social setting where there were only women and children, most likely they would lift their veils.

As for her comment about her husband letting her wear whatever she wants, I can't speak for her, but perhaps it was worded that way because of the common misconception that her husband *made* her wear the veil so she's like "huh? that's so silly, I can wear whatever I want at home."

As I said I know many many niqabi sisters, and not *one* is doing it for her husband. They are very much doing it to please their Lord. If it pleases their husband in the process, great. If not, oh well.

In my case, for instance, when I decided to start wearing it, hubby was *not* impressed. He doesn't feel it's necessary and he preferred I didn't. I did it anyway

If it makes a difference, I'm not from "another culture". I'm speaking as a North American, born and raised in this culture who came to Islam when I was 19.

HTH

[annettemarie]

Please keep in mind that Finding Your Tribe is a support-only forum. This particular thread is a support thread for women who choose to dress modestly. It is not intended to be an "ask a modest dresser" thread. Questions such as the one above are best hosted in another forum, probably spirituality. Thanks!

[Gabesgrrrl]

Sorry!

I didn't realize it wasn't a good place to ask. I'll move it elsewhere.

And thank you to neveryoumindthere for her very honest, very informative answer to my question!

Hugs!

Marcie

[AJP]

I just wanted to say that board shorts and rash guard shirts make great swimwear, and knee-length board shorts aren't uncommon, sometimes you can even find them in capri lengths. They're made from quick-drying material, and designed for going in the water. I dislike regular swimwear, both because it's too revealing for me to want to be in public in it and because it's so uncomfortable to me. Try surf shops or catalogs with surf wear for that kind of stuff.

[*~Member~*]

I've recently become personally convicted to dress modestly. But am having a bit of a tough change over. However I've been sort of conservatively dressing for about 5 years. I've not worn anything shorter then capri mid calf pants or long pants in that time. The tank tops is what will be hard for me to give up.

I'm slowly doing it though

[Eve80]

Hi Mamas,

I'm a hijab wearing Muslim woman and have been for...about 15 years or so. I just found this site and I thought it was cool, especially the profiles of "Haute Hijabis."

[annettemarie]

I'm so excited! I found a suitable suit for Katie Grace at Target today. I don't hit the modesty stuff hard with my kids or anything, but you know it's bad when the children are all "Why are there holes in the side?!? That's not modest!"