Originally Posted by Spring Flower
But...sometimes I do feel like the commonly "alternative" approaches to parenting found on MDC didn't hold up to their promise in my case. As I said earlier, I did a lot of alternative, thoughtful, fully researched things and still have a child with sensory issues. But I do truly think that if I stopped the attachment parenting, things would be much, much worse.
I just want add that it seems strange to me... We raise our children on a different path from 90-95% of the children in our society. Their emotional, mental, and physical environments are not typical. The truth is that this is an "Alternative" lifestyle website, celebrating the less walked path, so it would be unreasonable to assume that any member of this website (even the non-special needs portion of it) are "typical", becuse the kind of person who seeks out something that is unusual is often well - unusual...
so why would anyone who is AP-noVAX-lactivist-Intactavist-Cosleep-homebirth-wholefoodist be suprised or upset when our children do not fall under the label of "typical"?
My personal truth is that our A-typical parenting style affords my kids the chance to be who they would naturally be, and my "abnormally" close relationship with them (ap) affords me the skills I need to see who they truely are. We are fully aware that we could easily "punnish away" many of our children's issues. They are both so eager to please that we could force them to eat whatever, to tolerate noises they don't want to tolerate, to stop touching things they want to stim on; but we do not do that. The truth is if it was priority for our children to act more typical, we could work on that and it would just happen, maybe even without realizing it we could have done that from birth. But that is not the lifestyle we choose.
Many of my children's sensory issues could be classified as "heightened awareness" in some areas, and deficited awareness in others. But when we seek a more natural lifestyle it seems like these types of variations would make a tribe/family/pack/gaggle more likely to succeed. Society is built on specialization, and my daughter's (verifiable) super human hearing and over-anxious nature would make her the perfect "look-out", while my son's extremly adept short-term pattern recognition ability would make him an excellent gatherer, whereas nameless high-school jock #1 might have made an excellent hunter/protector.
If everybody's job/talents were the same, we would all be cows, grazing passivly on grass. But it isn't; we have brought our specializations together to become more than passive grazers. If everyone was the same, humans would die in one generation. Sensory issues are an important part of diversity, and although they are not always obvious, I believe they are necessary.