I lied to the pediatrician...

[~NewMa~]

Yeah, I know, not good.
Last appointment at 4 days old I told her we were cosleeping and she was not happy. She started talking SIDS and said he shold be on his back in his own bed with a nuk in his mouth if that's what it takes to comfort him.
It's not just about him though, sad to say. I feel more comfortable with him in our bed, not to mention he just won't sleep if he's alone.
The midwife said cosleeping's fine. She said his bassinet must seem like the freakin grand canyon to him after being in the womb for so long and to be away from our body heat must be lonely.
I understand! I want him right there with me!
He usually sleeps right on my chest--- chest to chest He gets mommy hugs all night long!
Anyone else sleeping in such close contact?
He does have a little sidecar type cosleeper basinett that's atached to our bed, I just can't put him down!

[attachedmamaof3]

I'm one that obsesses (and is aware that I do this) and has to have my babies touching me during sleep. When they're very new, I wake up and need to make sure they're breathing/not too hot or cold/doing okay. I will literally not sleep all night if I am not able to check on them like I need to. My oldest had a crib we tried (but I couldn't do it) and my middle had a bassinet we never used so I didn't even get the stuff for my third.

I very much relate with wanting/needing this contact during sleep. I've co-slept with all of my kids. In fact, my DD has slept with us, on my body (or near me in bed) every night of her life.

[xekomaya]

Unless you have sleep problems yourself, smoke, are an alcoholic, etc. Co-sleeping does not put you at more risk of SIDS.

From personal closeness to the situation, its way too emotional an issue for me to discuss rationally... But you should check out the nighttime parenting forum for more info about sleeping with your baby

And if any pediatrician tried to tell me not to cosleep... omgoodness.. the answer would come something like " we pay you to look for and treat medical problems, not give parenting advice. If you can't do the job you're hired for, we'll find someone else who can"

[katebh]

I wouldn't worry about lying to a pediatrician about what I consider to be a "parenting" issue. The pediatrician is responsible for helping you with "medical" issues, and co-sleeping isn't one of them. I can't imagine not co-sleeping with my baby. How else do I know he's OK every time I wake up (every hour!)? Sometimes it's easier to smile and agree and then do what's best for you and your baby. Congrats!

[thomlynn]

Originally Posted by katebh

I wouldn't worry about lying to a pediatrician about what I consider to be a "parenting" issue. The pediatrician is responsible for helping you with "medical" issues, and co-sleeping isn't one of them. I can't imagine not co-sleeping with my baby. How else do I know he's OK every time I wake up (every hour!)? Sometimes it's easier to smile and agree and then do what's best for you and your baby. Congrats!

Yup, tell them you're not there for parenting advice. My ped was giving waaaaaaaay too much parenting advice and not any good medical advice with dd so we've stopped going.

[CarrieD]

You may be interested in James Mckenna's book Sleeping With Your Baby. He has studied mother/infant sleep and shares with parents how to bedshare safely. If you are sharing sleep safely and breastfeeding you are greatly reducing your childs chance of SIDs. He shares some really interesting facts/studies in there that support your choice.
Don't feel bad about not being truthful with your doctor.

[2xshy]

I totally understand. I feel so much more comfortable sleeping in contact with Eden that i could not imagine how anyone could sleep in a separate room from their babe.
I wake up fairly often and check to see how shes doing, making sure there are no blankets on her and that she's in a safe position. I have a co-sleeper but as soon as she stirs and realizes shes not beside me she wakes up. I do try to set her down in it occasionally though because i would like her to be able to sleep in it for some amount of time.

[ishereal]

I co-sleep also, I would not have it any other way !!!!!

[Jennisee]

I don't think I could stay with a doctor who was so pushy about things that went against my parenting.

When my DD was little, the doctor asked why we coslept, and I explained that DD was waking up hourly in the crib, and by cosleeping, I was able to get a full night's sleep. He asked me, "Do you think she'd go back to sleep in the crib if you let her cry?" I looked at him for a long time before answering and finally just said, "I. Wouldn't. Know." He's never brought it up again.

[Datura]

Just throw all the research from Dr. McKenna and the Sears clan at her. There is a growing body of evidence that cosleeping *reduces* the risk of SIDS. Plus I'm pretty sure that a binky can increase the chance since it can obstruct breathing??

[pixiepunk]

ITA with Jennisee, i don't think i could stay with a doctor who was that far out of line with my parenting philosophy. especially when talking about a newborn. i would foresee pushiness at 4 months to start solids, questions about when you're going to wean starting at 6 months, etc. so unless i had no other options i would try to find someone who was at least respectful if not in full agreement with my parenting style. it gets harder to lie and keep track of your lies as time goes on and there's no reason why you should have to. i haven't found a local ped yet, but the one we had where we used to live was so awesome - totally on board with extended nursing and co-sleeping and was even knowledgable about homeopathy. there were many times when i look back on it that it would've been hard to get decent medical advice if i hadn't been able to be truthful about how i parented.

re: the pacifier, there was a study out a year or two ago that showed pacifier use reduced the risk of SIDS. i can't remember why, and i'm not a big fan of pacis. but that's where that comment came from.

[New_Natural_Mom]

That ped is incredibly uneducated. Co-sleeping actually reduces the incidence of SIDS. Duh. We weren't planning on co-sleeping, it just happened. My husband was initially uncomfortable then he did all this research and found how beneficial it is to the baby. Now he is all for it. It is the only way we get any sleep. We either co-sleep or mommy sleeps with baby on the boppy in the rocking chair.

Check out the family bed forum for facts you can tell your doc.

[sparkly]

Emmett has slept on our chests since day 1. We didn't plan it that way...we were planning on having him in the crib sometimes, and sleep in our bed next to us sometimes (like when he was a little bigger), but he insists on being on one of us, so that's the way it is. He hates being on his back, too. The doctor is fine with it--he said 20 years ago everyone thought babies should be on their stomachs so they wouldn't choke on spit-up, and in 20 years we'll probably think sleeping on one's back is crazy. As long as he is sleeping, and we're not having him sleep somewhere dangerous, he said everything is fine. I'm learning to sleep on my back, and actually really like having him right there cuddled up with me.

You should switch doctors, because who knows what other issues will come up! Our doctor is a family doctor, not a pediatrician, and he's had kids of his own...I wonder if those two reasons are partly why he's pretty laid back.

[treehuggermama]

I have slept with all of my babies and love it! I figure this time is precious and it is not like they are going to still be sleeping with us by high school We also invested in a king sized bed before dd so we have tons of room for the whole family.

[mom2liv]

Just to throw in my two cents:

It is EXTREMELY hard to find open-minded or AP-friendly peds in my area. With dd #1, I used to hate going because my ped (who I actually like as a person) would always give WAY too much parenting advice and it would cause dh to question the direction I thought we should go. I used to lie to ped about co-sleeping in particular.

Second baby, wow how much have I changed. DD#2 had severe jaundice at birth (ABO incompatability) and I refused to supplement. I told him without question she was sleeping with me, we were doing limited vaxes on an alt schedule, and I'll be using child-led weaning. And no, she won't be CIO like he had recommended with dd#1 (though I never did it). And you know what? He just looked at me and said, "Okay. Give me your vax schedule, I'll note your chart about your wishes, and no one here will give you a hard time or bring it up again." I couldn't believe it! DH said "I think he was afraid to cross you."

I fully believe motherhood is an evolutionary process--good for you for following your instincts and knowing what is best for you and your baby already!

[tinyshoes]

(during these types of discussions I like to point out that SIDS used to be called 'crib death')

[KariM]

I've co-slept with all of my kids and will continue to do so regardless of what docs say on the topic.

My DD1 insisted on sleeping under my right armpit. She had to have her head against some part of my body - recreating the womb?

My DD2 (this babe) likes to have me touching her, but is willing to accept just lying next to me with our sides touching. She doesn't need head contact.

I can't remember my son's preferences, but cut me some slack - that was nearly 17 years ago!

[cubasianchica]

Im co sleeping too for all the reasons all the other mamas stated. I found this link that might be helpful for you:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t102200.asp

I say dont worry and keep doing what your doing.

[esmlranch]

i just wanted to throw out there that the use of a paci is the #1 cause of ear infections.

we cosleep with 2. we have 2 sidecar beds hooked onto ours but no one really uses those!

do whatever works for you, your little one, and family

[New_Natural_Mom]

Originally Posted by esmlranch

i just wanted to throw out there that the use of a paci is the #1 cause of ear infections.

we cosleep with 2. we have 2 sidecar beds hooked onto ours but no one really uses those!

do whatever works for you, your little one, and family

Do you have a link to support for this?