Cosleeping the first few weeks

[Molck]

Okay, I've read all the official things about this on MDC and elsewhere (minimal bedding, firm mattress, rails, etc.), but I'm wondering your opinions on what our cosleeping setup should look like, especially at first when baby is tiny and we're all just getting to know each other.

We have a firm queen mattress on a bed with no headboard. The plan was to simply have our blanket/sheet away from our faces, DH and I each with one pillow and in the bed as DH-->me-->baby. Is this enough?

I really doubt the baby will fall out of the bed, so we weren't planning to get a bumper/railing at first (may get a humanity family bed down the road once baby gets more mobile). S/he wouldn't fall at the newborn stage unless I somehow (God forbid) pushed him/her, right? If this is really a problem, we could sleep on the floor (I love a firm surface when no pg-- though I have no idea what my hips/back are going to be like after giving birth).

Just wondering what your setup is going to look like (or what you did with your first). I'd rather play it by ear, but I want to be at least minimally prepared.

[kalisage]

I've never got the railing until babe can roll around/move. Our set-up will be dd in her bed bumped right next ours, me, baby & DP. In the past, long ago I used one of those baby positioners in between but I don't plan on using one again.

As for bedding, a lightweight quilt, sheets & 2 pillows. HTH!

[alegna]

I'll tell you what we did with dd that we're planning on doing again.

We have pillows.

Baby is down at boob-height, so away from pillows.

Sheet and light blanket pulled up to my shoulder then down to baby's waist.

The end.

-Angela

[cj'smommy]

Since DH rolls on me when he sleeps and we only have a full size bed, I bought one of those Arms Reach mini Co-sleepers.

DS#1 would sleep in bed with just me from 6:30 on when he woke up to nurse and by then DH was awake and out of bed. He'd take his pillow off the bed and I kept a blanket down low. It was Dec, so it was cold!

DS#2 had a different schedule and never really ended up in bed with us, but his cradle was right next to me against the bed.

[NatureMama3]

here's how we did it and will do it again.

regular bed--nothing fancy. pillows for each of us facing vertical || rather than horizontal=. one comforter on the bed, baby up a little toward our pillow/head area so it isn't at risk of the comforter.

DH>baby<me. I'm not afraid of DH being near baby and think the edge of the bed riskier. DH is every bit as aware of baby as I am and experience has proven that correct time and time and time again.

[Galatea]

When I only had one baby, I flipped the baby across me at night to change boobs. So the baby could be either between me and dh or on the edge of the bed. I got a railing so I didn't have to be aware of where we were in the bed at night. Plus, it was good to lean my h20 bottle against it.

[majormajor]

we didn't start cosleeping with DD until she was 4-6 mos old (can't remember!) before that, she would fall asleep in bed next to me, but DH would be awake watching TV or something (we'd both fall asleep at 8. her longest stretch of sleep always started at 8, and i wanted to catch it!) by 10, DH would move her to her bassinet right next to us. i didn't expect her to be so tiny when she was born (she wasn't small for a newborn or anything, 7.5 lbs and 21 inches, but that's TINY!!), so we weren't comfortable with her in our bed.

i'm really not comfortable cosleeping with even bigger babies, so here's what i did. it's ok, you can laugh.

-no pillow for me. i don't always use one though, so this was no biggie
-vertical pillow for DH, like naturemama3 explained
-bed made so that blankets only come up to chest level
-DD at face level. i figured there's no way we could roll over onto her and suffocate her with our faces
-DD between me and DH or me and wall. i don't think it's a good idea to have nothing between the baby and the side of the bed. even newborns can sometimes flip themselves over
-firm mattress, no headboard (just a mattress on the floor)
-no smoking or drinking for either of us


i'm obviously neurotic and not comfortable with cosleeping, so hopefully this baby will sleep well on their own. when they're bigger, i love it (DD comes into bed with us every night around 2 am. she's almost 3, and i love cosleeping with her now). but anyway, that's what we did.

[tschecter]

personally, I will reccomend a bumper or rail or some kind of barrier, especially if this is your first, because you never know when that baby will roll. my experience is this:

DS rolled over on day 2 of life.

I rolled over before day 3 of life, as did each of my siblings (never did find out exactly how early more than that)

in my family, babies roll VERY EARLY. They don't know what they are doing of courser, but it is the presense of that muscle there that allows them to do it, and it can still be dangerous (especially if ythey roll out of bed)

so, we will do as we did last time, and put the cosleeper attached to our bed to start off with, even if baby doesn't sleep in it, because it is a lot less painfull for me than the bedrail, which has support rails under the mattress that caused me great back pain when we used it with DS after we were sure he would never sleep in the cosleeper.

[ericaz]

Graeme likes to sleep with his head in my cleavage. He's such a man, lol.

We have a king mattress on the floor and like someone said, I keep the baby at boob level.

[lovingmommyhood]

Originally Posted by ericaz

Graeme likes to sleep with his head in my cleavage. He's such a man, lol.

Hilarious!!

So wait, you guys sleep during the first few weeks?? Not fair. I live in fear that the baby is going to stop breathing whether they're next to me in bed or in a bassi next to the bed. I'm hoping I'll be better now that this is my third babe but I doubt it.

[Molck]

Originally Posted by majormajor

...
-DD at face level. i figured there's no way we could roll over onto her and suffocate her with our faces...

. Sorry... this painted such a funny picture in my mind. Something along the lines of being smothered with kisses.

[NatureMama3]

So wait, you guys sleep during the first few weeks?? Not fair.

given that I STILL wake up to feel for my 5 y/o breathing and will on occasion have DH check the older boys for the same reason...

I'm apparently easily pacified once I know they're still breathing. Early on I just check more often.

[Nate'sMama]

Originally Posted by alegna

I'll tell you what we did with dd that we're planning on doing again.

We have pillows.

Baby is down at boob-height, so away from pillows.

Sheet and light blanket pulled up to my shoulder then down to baby's waist.

The end.

-Angela

Ditto!

I had my DS in a bassinet for the first few weeks and never slept better after I brought him into bed!
Happy cosleeping

[joyfilledmomma]

dh is just not very aware when he's sleeping and dd was born in the winter, so i wasn't comfortable having her in bed with us right away because i am a pillow and lots of blankets girl in the winter. she slept in a bassinet right beside me till about 9 months or so when i brought her into bed. at this point we sidecarred the crib, so while she was mostly right up against me if she rolled she would just roll right into the crib and not out of bed. i did nap with her often during the day though from the time she was born and just had her in bed with me with a firmer pillow on the other side in case she rolled.

right now i am planning to start off doing the same for this dc, but i really do think I would've slept better with dd right in the bed with me since i had to lift her out of the bassinet to nurse....i suppose something like an Arm's Reach cosleeper would be a nice compromise, but they were too pricey for us.

[Nate'sMama]

Originally Posted by joyfilledmomma

i suppose something like an Arm's Reach cosleeper would be a nice compromise, but they were too pricey for us.

I just bought one used on Craigslist as a just in case!

[theatermom]

This:

Originally Posted by alegna

We have pillows.

Baby is down at boob-height, so away from pillows.

Sheet and light blanket pulled up to my shoulder then down to baby's waist.
-Angela

And this:

Originally Posted by Galatea

When I only had one baby, I flipped the baby across me at night to change boobs. So the baby could be either between me and dh or on the edge of the bed.

I've only had one of my babes fall out of bed, and it was when ds#1 was 10-11 months old, and taking a nap (we actually had our mattress on the floor at that point, so it wasn't a big deal regardless). None have fallen out while we were sleeping with them. A railing/safety gate won't hurt anything, though, and may help you sleep better. I did use one with ds#3 because ds#2 is an all-over-the-bed kind of sleeper, and I didn't want the baby and me shoved too far to the edge in the middle of the night.

[GiGiQ]

I'd love feedback from experienced cosleepers, but this is my plan:

We got rid of our bed long ago in favor of futon mattresses on the floor. They are nice firm futons intended as bedding, not the flimsy ones every college kid has as seating. We usually keep two of them stacked to save space, and put one in the office when we need a guest room. I think we'll just unstack them, so there's plenty of room for both of us plus baby. That will cover the area of two full-sized beds, only about 5 inches off the floor (which is carpeted in the bedrooms), so I don't feel the need for rails. It's already quite warm here, so we're using a sheet at most and can do away with that by wearing pajamas. She'll be at least 3 months, probably more like 6 months, before we need to worry about much bedding again.

[MamaJ2005]

We have a generic, king sized, temperpedic mattress on the floor. With DD, we had a regular queen and a basinet that converted to a co-sleeper, but guess what??? She refused to sleep in it! HAHA... And I'm SO GLAD! We did end up dropping our bed to the floor after she became mobile and fell off. She was fine, but it SCARED the crap out of us! This time, we have a moses basket I use to put baby in, if I want to take a shower and both girls are asleep. I don't want #1 rolling over on her accidently or something. Co-sleeping ROCKS!!!

[1babysmom]

Originally Posted by alegna

I'll tell you what we did with dd that we're planning on doing again.

We have pillows.

Baby is down at boob-height, so away from pillows.

Sheet and light blanket pulled up to my shoulder then down to baby's waist.

The end.

-Angela

Ditto! I did use a soft sleep positioner sometimes (the Sassy brand, i think) when she was on my other side (the outside) and she never went anywhere.

[MamaWolfe]

We put our mattress on the floor, removed the pillows, and bought a "baby box"
http://www.target.com/First-Years-Cl...e=1&rh=&page=1
(We got ours at Baby's R Us for $25). We're gonna do the same thing this time. I'm paranoid, especially with being exhausted the first few weeks and you can't be too careful!