Originally Posted by boigrrrlwonder
I think that now that I'm trying to look into the positive of waiting, a thing I also really want to work on is preparing my daughter. Part of it is working on our breastfeeding relationship to get to a place where I wouldn't feel bad if she weaned due to my pregnancy (either her choice or mine). Another thing is to get her ready for having a sibling - which I'm not sure what I mean by that, but part of me worries that she's not ready for one.
I am worried about this as well. In fact - my son is my only worry. I know I am ready. But I think I would still worry if my son was ready even if I was waiting until he was 10 years of age! lol... This is one of the reasons though that we have decided on a larger age gap. My relationship with him is what comes first. I think our relationship is strong enough to add another member to the family. A lot of this lies in the fact though that when I think of 'what would happen if we had an 'accident''...I am not freaked out by the idea - where I would have if we had an 'accident' a few months ago. I am not sure if that makes sense...but that is how I know that we are ready, as a family, to add to our family.
I think a lot of my worries with my son though - is the fact he is not asking for a brother or sister. He is also not even remotely interrested in babies. This only worries me as many other children I know his age do these things. But that doesnt necessarily mean he is not ready for a sibling. I think he is actually more like his father... Loves his family, but doesnt mean is is over the moon with the thought of 'babies' lol... I actually feel that through pregnancy together and once the 'baby' is here...my son will be fine with it as the baby will indeed be seen as another loving member of the family.
I am not really planning on preparing him for a sibling now - I personally think the idea is just too arbitrary fo him. But I have a list of books I am going to get him for Christmas (if all goes to plan, I should hopefully be 4 months pregnant then! hehe)...They are books about siblings and homebirths. (I can post the list later - they tend to be more 'crunchy' in their approach - I got them off the LLL website!
)...So he is at least familiarised with the concept so when it all does happen hes not totally lost at the idea iykwim.
Other than that - I just want to make sure nothing changes, and that he knows that. Hes pretty independent - doesnt need my constant attention - we live very consensualy and start off quick TCC - so I think it all helps in that. I can see how the way I parent will indeed help...co sleeping and babywearing. The 'baby' wont really infringe on his life at first and he will still have all those things that help us reconnect such as the co sleeping to help ease him into our family of four life.