Wanting but Waiting tribe - Page 7

[Monarchgrrl]

I would love to TTC now, but we're waiting til late 2009. NAMES! I love names!

I've thought about names since I was 12! I haven't found any boy names that I'm in love with, though. I can never think of interesting middle names, either. My middle name and DP's first name is Elizabeth, so we might end up using that as a middle name somewhere. Also, DP's family is Mexican and mostly only Spanish-speaking so we have to find a name that they can pronounce. Everything I come up with for a boy is nixed based on that alone.

Girls:
Sophia
Olivia
Hailey
Zoe
Ella


Boys:
Oliver
Eli
Issac
Gabriel
Grayson

[Brown Lioness]

Blah!

Originally Posted by *Amy*

I spoke to soon! I started today, of course while I was out in khaki shorts and no "supplies."

[crazyeight]

well i tested. BFN on both! screwy body. my temp was the highest i've ever seen it today....even higher than my normal day time temp! i don't know whats going on with that and hopefully a fluke. seems like it should've been a dip today since i thought it was o cramps last night and my cervix hasn't changed so its not pain from that. WTH?

[knittinanny]

I love thinking about names. I know I should probably have a whole list since it's likely that once I meet my DC, they won't look at all like the names I've picked for them.

All I've got so far is Tamsin Atlanta (girl), Taliesin Dallas (boy), and Jesse Michael (either). Atlanta and Dallas are two important cities for me and DP (Dallas is where we met, Atlanta where we lived for several years), and I've always, always just felt I'd have a Jesse Michael. We both have Michaels in our families. I'm not wild about Taliesin, but DP really loves it.

Recently I've also started to like Ruth Sterling, Ruth Preston, or Ruth Jeanne-Louise (our grandparents' names) for a girl. I feel like I'll have mostly boys though, so I should probably come up with more boy names. Unfortunately I have a while to come up with them. :

[Mommy2Liz]

I am also wanting but waiting. I guess in a way I'm terrified, but wanting and waiting.

I watch others with more than 1 child and it terrifies me. I really don't know if I can handle it!! I always thought I wanted 3 or 4 kids and now I am getting used to the idea of having only one, two possibly.

I will for sure wait to TTC until at least Spring 2009...maybe later. My waiting is for several reasons. Part of it is from the struggle we had to conceive DD. I really don't know if I can handle the heartache again. There are other reasons too.

[naturallyspeaking]

I'm also wanting as my biological clock is ticking ticking ticking... but my 2 year old is still nursing and we are financially unstable (but I really don't care about money issue thrown in when you are trying to decide to have more kids). You can have or not have money anytime but you can't have kids whenever you want...
Also my DH is not sure if we are ready for #3 just yet (he says I need more recuperation time from my previous pregnancy which was healthy, almost perfect one)...

[Kama82]

I am glad I am not the only one thinking of names already. Last time I didn't feel like I really got to enjoy picking my daughters name because I was too hormonal so this time I would like to have a list of names already around for when I get pregnant.
Right now I feel like the only real solid barrier to us having another child is my weight I really feel like I need to be in excellent physical health before I try again so I can maximize my chances of a successful vbac.

[*Amy*]

Originally Posted by Mommy2Liz

I am also wanting but waiting. I guess in a way I'm terrified, but wanting and waiting. I watch others with more than 1 child and it terrifies me. I really don't know if I can handle it!!

I feel that way too sometimes, and also think about the fact that now that DD is 2 1/2, things are so much easier!!! Not that having a newborn isn't wonderful in its own way, but it's so nice for us to be able to go out on dates again. We're really talking seriously about moving next year, closer to family either in Texas or Athens GA, and I think that having the support would make things so much easier.

I was kind of thinking I might be ready next month, but now that I am really wanting to get serious about doula and lactation consultant training, I'm thinking it would be so nice to have this year to focus on that and then think about TTC next spring if that's what we want to do. When DD starts Montessori in August, it will be the first time in almost three years that I will have had some time to myself, and I am SO looking forward to it! I might want to just really savor it for a while before doing it all over again....

[Ianthe]

Originally Posted by *Amy*

I was kind of thinking I might be ready next month, but now that I am really wanting to get serious about doula and lactation consultant training, I'm thinking it would be so nice to have this year to focus on that and then think about TTC next spring if that's what we want to do.

this is OT, but how are you going about with the LC training? that is what i want to do too (as well as doula), but its going to take me years...

[*Amy*]

Originally Posted by LizzyQ

this is OT, but how are you going about with the LC training? that is what i want to do too (as well as doula), but its going to take me years...

Yep, it's not quick, that's for sure! I'll PM you so as not to hijack the thread.

[Kama82]

So we were thinking of trying after I finish my masters degree (hopefully in August of 2011). After thinking about this more I realized that having a baby in my first year at a new job is probably not the best idea. Would I even have insurance or maternity leave? It would also mean that we would have a newborn in my husbands second year of pharmacy school which I have heard is the hardest one. I guess we could wait until he is done with pharmacy school in 2014 but that would make my daughter 10 years old when the second child is born and we just don't want to space our kids that much.

My husband told me that if we do not have another one in the next few years that he doesn't ever want to have another one because he just doesn't want his kids spaced that much. The truth is I don't either.

So the ideal time for us financially and time wise would be some time in 2014-2016. It makes the most logical sense. In my heart that is not what I want at all, I don't want to wait that long, and I don't want my kids to be spaced 10 years (or more) apart.

If I know logically that this is the best choice for us why is it so hard to do it. I know there is no time between then and now that we can try for a baby so why am I even thinking about it.

[angelxxrose]

I am another person wanting but waiting. Dh and I are both 26 and waiting until next summer/fall to TTC. We are waiting until I finish my master's next May. I also have tubs of baby stuff and names picked out

Girl - Cameron Rose
Boy - Langdon Patrick

[Kama82]

So after much soul searching I think we have a tentative goal of starting to TTC sometime early next year. Having a date to focus on makes me happier, how is everyone doing?

[crazyeight]

i don't wanna wait!!!! :cry i want to be preggers! i want a baby! i want to complain about my back and be so huge people think i'm faking! i want to give birth and be afraid i'm going to break this precious newborn...i want to make a Mei Tai and actually be able to USE it asap... ok just 4.5 months to go....only 4 and a HALF months....see time is going by and i can do this. yeah right.

[Brown Lioness]

Originally Posted by Kama82

So after much soul searching I think we have a tentative goal of starting to TTC sometime early next year. Having a date to focus on makes me happier, how is everyone doing?

Eh, I'm doing. TTCing still feels like light years away (not considering it until LATE 2009), we still have such a long way to go as far as planning and goals and the fact that hubby still won't even entertain my puppy begging makes me feel even THAT much more hopeless about a baby anytime soon.

Meanwhile, i have coworkers popping out babies left and right, i still see pregnant women all the time and hubby and I are still spot the cutest lil kids in our neighborhood (we seem to run into at LEAST one most anytime we are out, sigh), thus creating this frustrated pause between us (thas the best I can describe it, its almost like silently saying "I know that should be us and Im sorry it isnt.").

[Sopho]

I want another baby!!!
I will join you mammas, and i'm hoping for a boy, but fo course i want a bigger gap between DD2 and the new baby, we'll start TTC'ing next year.

Knowing myself, if we start in March 2009, probably we suceed by May of the same year, imo the gap will be perfect.
DH want's to TTC know, he says he's old (he's 43) but i don't think so, i'm sorry, but he'll have to wait.

[Kama82]

Brown Lioness *hugs*.
By early next year I mean I *might* get my IUD out next June. It just sounds better if I say early but in reality I will count myself lucky if we are anticipating a new baby in may of 2010.
I totally feel you on the babies everywhere it sucks

What is worse is when people badger me about it. "when are you having another baby, do it now blah blah". Ugh.

[boigrrrlwonder]

I think that now that I'm trying to look into the positive of waiting, a thing I also really want to work on is preparing my daughter. Part of it is working on our breastfeeding relationship to get to a place where I wouldn't feel bad if she weaned due to my pregnancy (either her choice or mine). Another thing is to get her ready for having a sibling - which I'm not sure what I mean by that, but part of me worries that she's not ready for one.

[ann_of_loxley]

Originally Posted by boigrrrlwonder

I think that now that I'm trying to look into the positive of waiting, a thing I also really want to work on is preparing my daughter. Part of it is working on our breastfeeding relationship to get to a place where I wouldn't feel bad if she weaned due to my pregnancy (either her choice or mine). Another thing is to get her ready for having a sibling - which I'm not sure what I mean by that, but part of me worries that she's not ready for one.

I am worried about this as well. In fact - my son is my only worry. I know I am ready. But I think I would still worry if my son was ready even if I was waiting until he was 10 years of age! lol... This is one of the reasons though that we have decided on a larger age gap. My relationship with him is what comes first. I think our relationship is strong enough to add another member to the family. A lot of this lies in the fact though that when I think of 'what would happen if we had an 'accident''...I am not freaked out by the idea - where I would have if we had an 'accident' a few months ago. I am not sure if that makes sense...but that is how I know that we are ready, as a family, to add to our family.

I think a lot of my worries with my son though - is the fact he is not asking for a brother or sister. He is also not even remotely interrested in babies. This only worries me as many other children I know his age do these things. But that doesnt necessarily mean he is not ready for a sibling. I think he is actually more like his father... Loves his family, but doesnt mean is is over the moon with the thought of 'babies' lol... I actually feel that through pregnancy together and once the 'baby' is here...my son will be fine with it as the baby will indeed be seen as another loving member of the family.

I am not really planning on preparing him for a sibling now - I personally think the idea is just too arbitrary fo him. But I have a list of books I am going to get him for Christmas (if all goes to plan, I should hopefully be 4 months pregnant then! hehe)...They are books about siblings and homebirths. (I can post the list later - they tend to be more 'crunchy' in their approach - I got them off the LLL website! )...So he is at least familiarised with the concept so when it all does happen hes not totally lost at the idea iykwim.

Other than that - I just want to make sure nothing changes, and that he knows that. Hes pretty independent - doesnt need my constant attention - we live very consensualy and start off quick TCC - so I think it all helps in that. I can see how the way I parent will indeed help...co sleeping and babywearing. The 'baby' wont really infringe on his life at first and he will still have all those things that help us reconnect such as the co sleeping to help ease him into our family of four life.

[Brown Lioness]

Originally Posted by Kama82

Brown Lioness *hugs*.
By early next year I mean I *might* get my IUD out next June. It just sounds better if I say early but in reality I will count myself lucky if we are anticipating a new baby in may of 2010.
I totally feel you on the babies everywhere it sucks

What is worse is when people badger me about it. "when are you having another baby, do it now blah blah". Ugh.

Thanks And yea, i would feel equally blessed if we could have a May 2010 baby (which means we would have conceived right around our anniversary).

Im sorry people are badgering you about the next baby. I really wonder why people care SO MUCH about the size, shape, and even the pace at which another family grows so much.