post #281 of 379
5/22/08 at 11:38pm
Mamas, I just read and caught up on our thread, but right now I just need to take and not give.
I called my older sister out via e-mail the other night. She didn't bother to meet ds2 till he was 11 months old (and only then 'cause we attended the same b'day party), has not made ANY effort to see Peter (hasn't even asked for a picture or called to see if he's alive), and most recently completely ignored my two older kids' birthdays. Her response back was that she would not dignify my family drama and utter nonsense with a response but that she "dearly loves" my children and I and that would never change.
My response back was that oddly enough it had never occured to me to show my love for her oldest son by ignoring his birthday or to demonstrate my love for her youngest son by failing to acknowledge that he existed. I told her that bottom line was that she didn't provide an explanation for her behavior because what she's done to the kids is just unacceptable, no way around it. I then added that regret is a bitter dish and that I genuinely hoped she enjoyed it with her crow.
We've had our issues over the years, but I can't believe that she's done this to my kids and that I've allowed it to continue to happen. I excused her behavior after ds2 was born, and even after Peter was born by telling myself that they're little and they don't know. But my big kids are 13 and 10, and what she did was just hateful and wrong.
Why do people have to be so ugly? I just need hugs and a reminder that my babies are better off without her around anyway.
I'm so sorry. I don't know that I'd say your kids are better off without her around, but I do think that you're being forced to expect nothing from her and be grateful for unexpected miracles or interest. That stinks
Mommy2Anna, I have a mental dam, lowering the water level so I can stand with my feet on the bottom and not drown. I have very few standards of housekeeping, so as long as the kitchen is clean and mostly tidy, the bathroom is clean and somewhat tidy, we eat 2000 calories a day including 5 portions of fruit and veg, kids have clean clothes and the rest of the house lies just above the dysentery level, I'm happy (It takes longer to write that onehanded than to actually do it.)
Aargh. You know how I said my life had gone quiet and boring? Read this
I am sorry you are dealing with that Helen. I got an "anonymous" letter one time that had an ad for a weight loss program in it... nothing more. It hurt. It hurt REAL bad. Even though it is ridiculous that anyone would care enough to even BOTHER with a stamp for something like that... it was very hurtful.
|Ok...I have some concerns and i need some info.
I know that Henry is better off esclusivly breastfeeding, and I am all for it. But my MIL over feeds Henry and i have spoken to her and she just doesn't get it. Plus we have been having some trouble at night where Henry will not take the breast. So long story short...my freezer stash is gone. I have 4 bags in there, each about 3 oz which will only last for Sunday. I work 2 days a week and I pump one time during my 5 hour shift. I absolutly hate pumping but I now know I will need to pump at least 2x every day. So until I can get my supply up in the freezer I will have to send some formula bottles with Henry. I plan on using that Baby's first formulababy's first so anyway...is there anyway to suppliment without totally killing my supply?
I know that every feeding he doesn't get from me reduces my supply...I plan on pumping. I also know that it will mess up his gut...technically it is already messed up b/c he had formula 2x after we moved to Ga and my supply almost dried up b/c of the stress and me not eating or drinking enough.
as I write this I am not sure why I am writing it...for support...for you all to tell me I am not a horrible mom...I don't really know. But I feel like I have to do this until I can up my freezer stash. I am gong to send what I do have in BM first before I send the formula...
ugh I will stop now b/c I am rambling.
|does anyone know how accurate this is?
milk calculatorMy Webpage
I only ask b/c it says that if Henry feeds 15 times in one day he should be eating 1.66 oz per feeding, and 2 oz per high range feeding.
I am worried b/c my MIL feeds Henry a lot...she insists that he is hungry. I have also started sending bottles that have 3-3.5oz each, and in 5-6 hours she will feed him 4 bags of milk...that is all I send...but I am very worried about her overfeeding him, and him getting used to overeating and expecting that all the time. Not only that but I dont think I can pump enough to keep up.
I am not giving up on breastfeeding at all...I worked to hard to get here...but I am not sure what to do.
When I pump I get a max of 3.5 oz but that is if i don't pump for 3 or 4 hours.
ugh...this is so stressful. I have talked ot her about giving him a paci when he is done. and about how bottle fed babies will eat not matter what...she will not listen.
for example on thursday I dropped him off at 11:30 and he nursed on both sides..ok that is at 11:30...she tells me when I pick him up at 6 that she fed him again at 12:10!!!! What made her think he was hungry?! of course he drank it. Then she was feeding him at 6 when I got there he was almost done. She tells me he just couldn't wait...then tells me that he was sitting in his swing and started fussing so she fixed the bottle...OMG maybe he was just tired of the swing!! She seemed so proud that he took all 4 bags of milk...I just don't know what to do...she doesn't get it, but we need her to watch him on that day.
|Allyn, I would have serious problems with mil if she didn't follow my wishes. I would find a new babysitter!|
|Often nursing babies will overeat from bottles because the flow is unstoppable. It may not be your MIL's fault entirely that he consumes more than he "should" during the day.|
|This article may help you rethink the need or use of a freezer stash. You don't really "need" it -- you simply need enough for the next day. Up your pumping, be healthy, let your body know that Henry needs more milk (even if it's from overfeeding). It will respond. s|