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These kids are three and four years old.. - Page 8

post #141 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4evermom View Post
That's funny, 'cause I didn't think so.

I'm of the camp which would rather ds NOT eat the most highly pesticide contaminated foods unless grown organically so that means no strawberries and raspberries from Costcos.

Costcos does a great line of organic frozen fruits. DS is tucking into blueberries as we speak, he prefers them frozen. Even fresh fruits I freeze to go in his morning yogurt.

We can give our kids healthy foods but there is no guarantee they'll eat them. I am lucky I have a healthy eater but I am not going to be smug about it!
post #142 of 243
Quote:
Little jabs about ASSuming and "the most judgemental food post ever" etc were made that were not productive, just snarky. Of course it's kind of the members here to be worried about the OP's day care families, but she is a member here, she's one of us, and even if you don't love what's she saying, being kind and respectful to her would be nice too.
Yeah I can agree with that-but I think most threads with this many post contain at least a few completely worthless, snarky posts.

I guess I am just so used to it that I don't notice it as much anymore
post #143 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by meganeilis View Post
Little jabs about ASSuming and "the most judgemental food post ever" etc were made that were not productive, just snarky. Of course it's kind of the members here to be worried about the OP's day care families, but she is a member here, she's one of us, and even if you don't love what's she saying, being kind and respectful to her would be nice too.
One of the reasons I would never use home day care is because many providers/mothers tend to be the most judgemental of all, as they are babysitting because they do not want to leave their own kids with babysitters. Over the years, the family day providers I''ve known are the ones at playgroup/library story hour etc who tend to talk about how they could never leave their kids, how lazy the parents are etc. 'They get off work at 4, but they don't bother to pick up until 5!" People tend to offer childcare in their homes so they can stay home. Most (not all, but flame me anyway) don't tend to think those women who work are good enough mothers. "I don't know *how* they could leave their own children!"

I've seen family day care poviders judge the most ridiculous things. From wanting the child to have only organic food to wanting the child to be changed more often. "Do they think their kid is the only kid I have?" or "They think their kid is *so* special!")

I also realize that too many people think some foods are healthy when they are aboslutely not! Non- fat prepared foods, fruit juice (even natural ones) , and non- organic fruits among them.

If I used child care, I would rather it be through a group of people with a variety of experiences and beliefts, over one mom who thinks her way is the only right way. There is nobody the home day parent can bounce ideas off of, or who witnesses (besides the children) her style. It's the day care providers judgement/beleif alone which determines the care, and if the parent disagrees, they are assumed wrong by the home day provider.
post #144 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by mammal_mama View Post
Yes, I totally got your point when I read your previous post! I knew you weren't judging other people for eating non-organic fruits: You were just asking them to stop! judging others for their purchasing choices. You were asking for the respect to be extended both ways.

It's so funny that anyone would think your post was the most judgmental!
Personal I was a bit offended that anyone would suggest this. *I* was going for "most judgmental post" and implying someone else has earned this title totally undermines all my work.
post #145 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Potty Diva View Post
Personal I was a bit offended that anyone would suggest this. *I* was going for "most judgmental post" and implying someone else has earned this title totally undermines all my work.


Maybe Next time...
post #146 of 243
Quote:
Costcos does a great line of organic frozen fruits. DS is tucking into blueberries as we speak, he prefers them frozen. Even fresh fruits I freeze to go in his morning yogurt.

We can give our kids healthy foods but there is no guarantee they'll eat them. I am lucky I have a healthy eater but I am not going to be smug about it!
A lot of Costco organic food, like Target and Walmart, and organic store brands are actually imported from China. There is no way to know if these 'industrial organics' are actually 'organic'. Most of the CA organic, even, are industrial as well. Even if they are not sprayed, the soil is pretty depleted and corners are cut. Factor in thousands of miles to market, and you're really not looking at food-food as our ancestors without disease knew it. When I thought of liottle kids not eating those trucked and sprayed strawberries, I thought "Thank god!"

Food that is not locally produced for local people are hugely lacking in nutrients.

It is very upsetting. We need to rethink what 'food' is.
post #147 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom View Post
One of the reasons I would never use home day care is because many providers/mothers tend to be the most judgemental of all, as they are babysitting because they do not want to leave their own kids with babysitters. Over the years, the family day providers I''ve known are the ones at playgroup/library story hour etc who tend to talk about how they could never leave their kids, how lazy the parents are etc. 'They get off work at 4, but they don't bother to pick up until 5!" People tend to offer childcare in their homes so they can stay home. Most (not all, but flame me anyway) don't tend to think those women who work are good enough mothers. "I don't know *how* they could leave their own children!"

I've seen family day care poviders judge the most ridiculous things. From wanting the child to have only organic food to wanting the child to be changed more often. "Do they think their kid is the only kid I have?" or "They think their kid is *so* special!")

I also realize that too many people think some foods are healthy when they are aboslutely not! Non- fat prepared foods, fruit juice (even natural ones) , and non- organic fruits among them.

If I used child care, I would rather it be through a group of people with a variety of experiences and beliefts, over one mom who thinks her way is the only right way. There is nobody the home day parent can bounce ideas off of, or who witnesses (besides the children) her style. It's the day care providers judgement/beleif alone which determines the care, and if the parent disagrees, they are assumed wrong by the home day provider.
Well, I've recently begun provide day care for a friend in her home, and I'm sorry that you are brushing off most in home day care providers with such sweeping negative responses. I'm not sure how never wanting to leave your kids with a DCP would be a negative attribute, especially on an AP board. I know from my personal experience that my 'style' does not set the tone for the care I provide. Because I am caring for a small number of children, the parents expect that I will be following their directions to a T, after all I don't have to work within to strict rules and regulations of a center and my attention is not spread thin. Basically, the disrespect and the expectation that things will be done a certain way is a two way street. The parents in these situations are not picture perfect, and neither are the DCPs. I hate to see day care providers treated poorly considering the amount of time, energy and care they put into their jobs. Caring for kids that are not your own is hard. It's not just tiring, it's hard on your heart because you come to really care for the kids and want the very best for them, and if a DCP is thinking about the kids' well being, and not the parents, well that can't be all that bad.
post #148 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by meganeilis View Post
Well, I've recently begun provide day care for a friend in her home, and I'm sorry that you are brushing off most in home day care providers with such sweeping negative responses. I'm not sure how never wanting to leave your kids with a DCP would be a negative attribute, especially on an AP board. I know from my personal experience that my 'style' does not set the tone for the care I provide. Because I am caring for a small number of children, the parents expect that I will be following their directions to a T, after all I don't have to work within to strict rules and regulations of a center and my attention is not spread thin. Basically, the disrespect and the expectation that things will be done a certain way is a two way street. The parents in these situations are not picture perfect, and neither are the DCPs. I hate to see day care providers treated poorly considering the amount of time, energy and care they put into their jobs. Caring for kids that are not your own is hard. It's not just tiring, it's hard on your heart because you come to really care for the kids and want the very best for them, and if a DCP is thinking about the kids' well being, and not the parents, well that can't be all that bad.
I hope most people have better family day provider experiences than I have had. In fact, I hope that my terrible expereinces are unusual.
post #149 of 243
wow this discussion has gone in so many different directions. but to the point of organic vs. non-organic, i did a little online research and came up with the following lists of the produce that soaks up pesticides, versus the produce that doesn't absorb as much. (you guys were right about the strawberries, thanks for the heads up.)

produce to buy organic only (otherwise has high pesticide exposure):
* peppers
* cherries
* peaches
* apples
* raspberries
* potatoes
* strawberries
* pears
* grapes
* celery

produce to buy organic only if you can afford it (has lower pesticide exposure):

* broccoli
* sweet corn
* mangoes
* sweet peas
* bananas
* avacados
* kiwi
* onion
* pineapple
* cauliflower
* asparagus
post #150 of 243
Asparagus, in fact, is among the safest of all commercial whole veggies/foods available. Asparagus, no matter where from, consistently contains nearly no pesticide residue. it's one of cleaniest, healthiest foods one can eat. And it's seasonal. Totally seasonal. If it's spring, it must be asparagus time. :
post #151 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by cancat View Post
This is so weird, because all those fruits are served regularly at the free playgroups run by the city/province. And it's usually all the kids will eat!
I see you are in Ontario..and yeah..I was thinking the same thing. I am noticing..and I'm not sure if it's regional but here where I live in SW Ontario kids eat a LOT of veggies. That's not to say there are no Mac and Cheese meals...we eat that occasionally on lazy nights but most nights we have salads/a cooked veggie etc. and my kids love raw and if I bring a veggie or a fruit tray to a kid event it's gone.

If I go to an event hosted by a parent 9//10 times there are veggies and fruits served with a dip but still lots of berries, kiwi, melon etc. I have one friend who will do a playgroup thing and have pizza and timbits and I think that's how they generally eat because both her and her dd are overweight(a lto) but I've noticed her dd goes for the fruit and veggies too.

Maybe we just have an abundance. Maybe there is more nutritional information and education available here. I don't know what it is but it does seem like I am surrounded by a lot more people who have fruit and veggie rich diets than what is described by most Americans as the SAD.

post #152 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom View Post
One of the reasons I would never use home day care is because many providers/mothers tend to be the most judgemental of all, as they are babysitting because they do not want to leave their own kids with babysitters. Over the years, the family day providers I''ve known are the ones at playgroup/library story hour etc who tend to talk about how they could never leave their kids, how lazy the parents are etc. 'They get off work at 4, but they don't bother to pick up until 5!" People tend to offer childcare in their homes so they can stay home. Most (not all, but flame me anyway) don't tend to think those women who work are good enough mothers. "I don't know *how* they could leave their own children!"

I've seen family day care poviders judge the most ridiculous things. From wanting the child to have only organic food to wanting the child to be changed more often. "Do they think their kid is the only kid I have?" or "They think their kid is *so* special!")

I also realize that too many people think some foods are healthy when they are aboslutely not! Non- fat prepared foods, fruit juice (even natural ones) , and non- organic fruits among them.

If I used child care, I would rather it be through a group of people with a variety of experiences and beliefts, over one mom who thinks her way is the only right way. There is nobody the home day parent can bounce ideas off of, or who witnesses (besides the children) her style. It's the day care providers judgement/beleif alone which determines the care, and if the parent disagrees, they are assumed wrong by the home day provider.

This entire post makes me sad. I did home daycare for a year and a half. Not because I'd never leave my kids in daycare, but because I had a friend in need and I was a stay at home mom. The daycare just kind of grew from there. I loved the kids I cared for, it's been 8 years and a cross country move and I still get updates about three of the kids I watched. (Well 6 kids, but 3 are a friend's kids)

I'm sorry you had a cruddy experience with a home daycare provider. I had nothing but positive experiences with them. When my kids did require daycare, I actively sought home daycares because I felt they were in a much more caring environment with a much lower child/provider ratio.
post #153 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pancakes View Post

I'm sorry you had a cruddy experience with a home daycare provider. I had nothing but positive experiences with them. When my kids did require daycare, I actively sought home daycares because I felt they were in a much more caring environment with a much lower child/provider ratio.
I've never used family day care. I have observed child care providers in playgroups, on playgrounds, and library story hours etc. These I've known were very judgemental of parents. If that's not you, that's lovely. We need loving providers who will not give off negative vibes to children because they don't approve of the parents' ways.

I can only speak to my experiences over the years. And my expereinces with wrt famiy day care providers over the years have not been good. I hope my experiences have been unusual.
post #154 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom View Post
I've never used family day care. I have observed child care providers in playgroups, on playgrounds, and library story hours etc. These I've known were very judgemental of parents. If that's not you, that's lovely. We need loving providers who will not give off negative vibes to children because they don't approve of the parents' ways.

I can only speak to my experiences over the years. And my expereinces with wrt famiy day care providers over the years have not been good. I hope my experiences have been unusual.
Two people I know had to pull their children from home daycare because they found out the dcp had a very, very low opinion of working mothers. In one instance, they realized the Mom was spending much of the time homeschooling her own older child.

I, OTOH, had a short-lived but lovely experience with an in-home provider. I would be upset though if she were posting about me on the internet.
post #155 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoopin' Mama View Post

I, OTOH, had a short-lived but lovely experience with an in-home provider. I would be upset though if she were posting about me on the internet.

I try not to think that my experiences would be common, but when I read the OP, it all came back.

It's so easy to dismiss other mothers' efforts. I don't think family child care providers should be so judging of the children and families they care for. There is a trust issue that should be respected. I used to get a sick feeling in my stomach when I heard day care moms say bad things about the kids they cared for or the parents who loved those kids. If it's not working, end it. If you find the child likes fruit or whatever, tell the parent "Zoie loved lunch today! She ate so many blueberries!'. Put positive vibes out into the world instead of feeling smug about what you have been able to provide for your own kids.
post #156 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom View Post
I try not to think that my experiences would be common, but when I read the OP, it all came back.

It's so easy to dismiss other mothers' efforts. I don't think family child care providers should be so judging of the children and families they care for. There is a trust issue that should be respected. I used to get a sick feeling in my stomach when I heard day care moms say bad things about the kids they cared for or the parents who loved those kids. If it's not working, end it. If you find the child likes fruit or whatever, tell the parent "Zoie loved lunch today! She ate so many blueberries!'. Put positive vibes out into the world instead of feeling smug about what you have been able to provide for your own kids.
I feel the same way

My Mom did daycare for years and she was so judgmental of the parents. ESPECIALLY when it came to their (the kids) diets.

She would gossip about it every chance she got.

She still talks about "the poor little girl who didn't know what celery was" (20 years ago!) and acts smug for introducing it to her

That is what drew me to this thread.

I would certainly hope that the majority of DCP's aren't like that, but I don't have any personal experiences (besides my Mother of course)

.
post #157 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by UUMom View Post
A lot of Costco organic food, like Target and Walmart, and organic store brands are actually imported from China. There is no way to know if these 'industrial organics' are actually 'organic'. Most of the CA organic, even, are industrial as well. Even if they are not sprayed, the soil is pretty depleted and corners are cut. Factor in thousands of miles to market, and you're really not looking at food-food as our ancestors without disease knew it. When I thought of liottle kids not eating those trucked and sprayed strawberries, I thought "Thank god!"

Food that is not locally produced for local people are hugely lacking in nutrients.

It is very upsetting. We need to rethink what 'food' is.
Yes his blueberries were grown in Canada. You know how you can't trust the standards of that uncivilised nation!

Mommier than thou much?!
post #158 of 243
Quote:
Yes his blueberries were grown in Canada. You know how you can't trust the standards of that uncivilised nation!

Mommier than thou much?!
I've got nearly nothin' on the OP, however, and her horrible day care parents who have never even bothered to given their children commercial blueberries from Canada.
post #159 of 243
Can we all just accept that not everyone feeds their children the same foods? This whole thread has my head spinning. Can you even imagine what the world would be like if there *were* rules governing what we feed our kids and when? "Okay, today is Monday so dinner tonight is fish (that you caught with your own hands, of course) with (organic) lemon butter sauce (1 Tbs only), baked potatoes (grown in your own garden) (1 tsp butter on top, no exceptions), (organic, grown in your own garden) green beans (sauted only, no herbs tonight) and apples (Gala only, sliced into 8 wedges). Dessert is one scoop vanilla ice cream, no toppings.

Seriously!

Why don't we all take a step back and be grateful that we DO have choices on what to feed our children! And, for those of us who are doing better, financially, than others- realize how lucky you are and how quickly the tables can turn. Be thankful you have the means to be choosy about what your child eats. Not everyone is that lucky.
post #160 of 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by StephandOwen View Post

Seriously!

Why don't we all take a step back and be grateful that we DO have choices on what to feed our children! And, for those of us who are doing better, financially, than others- realize how lucky you are and how quickly the tables can turn. Be thankful you have the means to be choosy about what your child eats. Not everyone is that lucky.

And not demonize little children and their families if they haven't eaten something you are able to feed your kids, for whatever reasons.
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