so bummed about Motherhood store - Page 2

[mommabird]

I know a few women who have given Motherhood their info and then gotten a Parents' Magazine subscription charged to them or have actually gotten a real, useable, legitmate Motherhood CREDIT CARD in their name as a result.

DO NOT give them your info!

oh, and in response to "we don't sell your info - we just want it so we can send gifts"... how do they think Enfamil gets the addresses so they can send out these gifts? That's right, Moherhood SELLS them!

They only reason I've ever been thankful for the copious amounts of samples they send and give to peds. is because I need them.

I have true low supply and must supplement with formula.

I do not need to justify this to you, nor should you make me and other women like me feel bad for doing it.

You all have your opinions to which you are entitled, but be aware that a lot of those opinions are not supportive of women in my situation. Often you make us feel even more inadequate. We already cannot 100% BF and saying some of the things you all have makes us feel worse - like we're bad moms for not trying harder to get that 100%.

[mamajake]

Originally Posted by mommabird

They only reason I've ever been thankful for the copious amounts of samples they send and give to peds. is because I need them.

I have true low supply and must supplement with formula.

I do not need to justify this to you, nor should you make me and other women like me feel bad for doing it.

You all have your opinions to which you are entitled, but be aware that a lot of those opinions are not supportive of women in my situation. Often you make us feel even more inadequate. We already cannot 100% BF and saying some of the things you all have makes us feel worse - like we're bad moms for not trying harder to get that 100%.

I'm sorry mommabird, but I don't see anyone in this thread making any remarks that could reasonably be interpreted as reflecting upon people who use formula. This discussion has been entirely about marketing practices. It has been critical of the sellers of contact information and those who mislead purchasers of one product solely to enrich a corporate machine.

If Mother's Work wished to help mothers in your position, there are many ways it could do that - with or without making additional corporate profit. As a consumer, I will choose if and how I might assist mothers who need formula. Mother's Work's practice of gathering and selling contact information means not only that I, the consumer, receive a product I do not want to receive, but that I am being used to make additional profit for Mother's Work without being compensated for doing so.

[Juvysen]

Because of the signs they have hanging around their store that say "nursing mothers welcome", my friends and I frequently hang out in there if we go to the mall, you know, when we need to nurse. We never buy anything : Makes me feel justified. They have those nice chairs near the dressing rooms and space for my kids to run around....

[mommabird]

mamajake -

I guess this thread just gives this vibe that formula is evil and always undermines BFing.

I'm also fighting some emotional issues I have with supplementing - since we do tell women to refuse to supplement, that they really can make enough.

The attitude that formula isn't good enough for babies makes those who need to supplement feel that much worse for giving our babies inadequate food.

I guess I read some of this as women being upset only because their info was sold to a FORMULA company, rather than just sold in general.

I'll try and check my ragin postpartum hormones a little better next time before I hit post.

[Cersha]

I gave them my info ONCE right before I had my chemical pregnancy...and then I got a can of formula in the mail right around the time that the baby from the "chemical" pregnancy would have been born. I was pregnant when it came (I got pregnant a few months after the chem.preg.) But I was LIVID. I called and made a stink. I've shopped at Motherhood since then, and I always tell them I don't want to give them my info cause I don't want that crap they send me. EVERY TIME the clerk argues with me, says that they NEVER sell info. BULL, LADY. The formula company TOLD me that motherhood sold them my info...So, just put the shirt in the bag...Ugh.

[AoifesMom]

I second what onlygirls said about their Parenting magazine scam. I caught what they were doing because I happened to have read the sales slip before I signed it but I know I usually don't and I am sure many people get suckered in and don't take the time to complain and get their money back. I think they are a disreputable company and avoid them at all costs. Plus, their clothes always seem to fall apart quickly and their return policy stinks.

[ramama]

I don't think that a mother should feel bad about needing or wanting formula samples and coupons, but when I'm obviously a BFer and I receive formula samples and coupons, I feel like it's a personal attack on my decision to BF. I'm not saying that it IS a personal attack, but I FEEL that it's personal. They should have an "opt-out" of formula coupons option.

Incidentally, I've never received formula samples, I've only received huge honkin' full-sized cans of formula (I mean, HUGE, like 36oz). Several of them, in fact. I wonder if checking "breastfeeding" on any form or survey earns you full-sized formula to "convert" you. And merely samples and coupons for those who are already FFing. It's not really formula itself that bothers me, it's the formula COMPANIES and their marketing practices that bother me.

By the way, I hate it when anyone sells my information. Junk mail is such a waste of resources.

[JessicaTX]

I've never had a problem with not giving them my phone number =D They ring it up, poise their hands over their lil typepad there and say "can I have your number?" and i say "Can I have yours?" and they shut up and finish ringing it up.

[mama in the forest]

mommabird You sound like a very very good mama to your babe....

I don't think formula undermines breastfeeding, it's the way it's marketed. (giving coupons to new mothers). The fact of the matter is that anyone...not only someone who's just had a baby, but even an unrelated stranger....anyone knows how to go and get themselves a can of formula. It's so readily available and such a common practice these days. It's almost assumed that you'll formula feed, and if you breastfeed, well, you'll have to at some point use formula. : What's lacking is not information and help getting and using FORMULA, it's information and help with BREASTFEEDING. So often a new mother has never even been exposed to another nursing mother, and when she has her own baby what she could use is some support and help from another experienced woman. Not a damn formula coupon.

I felt that the sales clerk was so biased and upset about her own experience with nursing, that she could not hear what I was really saying. She personalized it and I tried very hard not to do that. She raised her voice to me and recounted how she couldn't breastfeed and wouldn't let me get a word in.....I was calm and just told her my feelings on the coupons. I could have gone on and on about how I have nursed six children for 20 years and I don't really see what's so hard about it all. I didn't do that. I just told her my feelings on the coupons.

OK, I'm over myself now.

[Phoenix_Rising]

Originally Posted by JessicaTX

I've never had a problem with not giving them my phone number =D They ring it up, poise their hands over their lil typepad there and say "can I have your number?" and i say "Can I have yours?" and they shut up and finish ringing it up.

That's awesome! I'll have to remember it

[mama in the forest]

I've never had a problem with not giving them my phone number =D They ring it up, poise their hands over their lil typepad there and say "can I have your number?" and i say "Can I have yours?" and they shut up and finish ringing it up.

[mamajake]

Originally Posted by mommabird

mamajake -

I guess this thread just gives this vibe that formula is evil and always undermines BFing.

I'm also fighting some emotional issues I have with supplementing - since we do tell women to refuse to supplement, that they really can make enough.

The attitude that formula isn't good enough for babies makes those who need to supplement feel that much worse for giving our babies inadequate food.

I guess I read some of this as women being upset only because their info was sold to a FORMULA company, rather than just sold in general.

I'll try and check my ragin postpartum hormones a little better next time before I hit post.

(((mommabird)))

I hate unsolicited contact of all kinds - particularly feeling that if someone is going to make money off of selling my name, it should be me. But, yes, I was very upset by receiving formula samples because I felt so much pressure to formula feed. Also knowing that formula is more expensive for those who truly need it because of the huge amount spent on marketing and free samples, and that the use of samples undermines those who can breastfeed but don't have the support they need. But it is all part of a much larger system that you and I did not make, and which you should never be made to feel bad about. I know how hard it is to feel like you are being judged even when you did the best you could - I had three c/sections when many of the people I hang out with had home births. I often feel judged or a need to explain what happened and how I didn't choose it but have to stop myself and really examine whether I am projecting the judgment.

Miriam Labbok has a great article in the last issue of the Journal of Human Lactation about the doctor's role in helping (or how they contribute to) mothers feeling guilt and judgment about not breastfeeding. It really helped me understand how much I felt was about being stuck in a stage of grief over not having had the birth experience I really wanted, as so many women don't have the breastfeeding experience they really want because they don't have the social and medical supports they need. I highly recommend the article. So many of us never completely grieve the loss of the childbearing or feeding experience we really wanted and it leaves us angry at other women. Mothering is hard enough without beating up on each other.

[bvnms]

Originally Posted by theboysmama

that nursing shirts weren't meant to be worn while pg.

I would have had to ask her if it was against the law. This sort of thing happened to me once. I had lost a bunch of weight and I decided to buy a pair of jeans that would fit soon as it would give me some motivation. I took them up to the counter and the cashier said..."Those aren't going to fit you, we have a larger size over here."

I asked to speak to the manager and told her that I don't believe that it's any of their business what size clothes I buy for myself.

[Leilamus]

Originally Posted by ramama

Frankly, as far as BF supplies go, Motherhood doesn't sell anything that isn't sold at Walmart (or Target, or Kmart). I wager that their *support* of BFing is just a front. They sell a few ill-fitting (at least for me) over-priced nursing bras and their selection of nursing tops is atrocious. Sure, they sell nursing pads and lansinoh, and the occasional breast pump, but so do all other stores on the face of the earth.

As many PPs have said, they are in the business of making money, and ONLY making money, not supporting mothers and the various choices they make.

: And the sales people (at our local one anyway) are not well-informed about the BFing products they do sell. Not that I expect the people are Target or Wal Mart to be either, but I figure in a store catering to pg and nursing mamas they should know something about the FEW Bfing supplies they sell. :

[cheygirl]

I had a similar experience at Thyme maternity here in Toronto. I was invited to sign up for a contest and be on their mailing list, and the contest form asked if I wanted to receive free stuff from Nestle. I asked the people at the cash why, as a maternity store selling nursing wear, they didn't support breastfeeding, and didn't they know about Nestle's unethical formula promotion practices? The cashier became very uncomfortable and said that the store is actually affiliated with Nestle. I declined to sign up for the contest, and I won't be shopping there again.

[Phoenix_Rising]

Originally Posted by cheygirl

The cashier became very uncomfortable and said that the store is actually affiliated with Nestle. I declined to sign up for the contest, and I won't be shopping there again.

Hmm. Guess they are somewhere else to add on my "boycott" list.

[Teyu]

Originally Posted by ramama

I wonder if checking "breastfeeding" on any form or survey earns you full-sized formula to "convert" you. And merely samples and coupons for those who are already FFing.

A friend told me that this is indeed the case. If you check "exclusively breastfeeding" on a card for freebees from a formula company you get checks for like $11-$15 versus checks for like $4 if you checkmark "formula feeding."

Classy.