Nervous Mess

[2happymamas]

I have my first ultrasound in about 2 hours at the RE's office. I am 5 weeks, 5 days and know that it is likely a heartbeat may not be showing just yet. They wanted to do one anyway to make sure everything was measuring correctly and appropriately.

I am a mess. I lost a baby (my first ever pregnancy) on Thanksgiving 2007 and am terrified of a repeat. I am so scared that the sac will be empty or something will not look right.

Is anyone else pregnant after losing a baby? I am finding myself holding back with this pregnancy. I am excited, but not like my first pregnancy. I feel as though I really need to protect myself. If I do not embrace this pregnancy with 100% of my being, it will not hurt as bad as last time if something is wrong.

[LoganBsMom]

Hoping for you that everything is ok. I have not been through a loss before, but also find myself scared silly this time, I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to embrace it so it doesn't hurt so much. Darn hormones make us crazy! Let us know how eveything turns out.

[A Mothers Love]

I am sorry for your loss We had a loss in Nov. too. It is hard. I do hope the u/s eases any concerns you have. Look forward to an update

[ruthmg]

I'm pregnant after a miscarriage. Everytime I go to the bathroom, I look at the toilet paper for blood. For my pregnancy loss, I was having a routine ultrasound at 8 weeks, and the ultrasound technician told me there was no heartbeat. Luckily, my mom was with me and helped me. I had a 2nd ultrasound the next day, same result. So I had a D&C.

I have my ultrasound on Monday at 6 weeks - my husband is coming this time. I feel more confident with this pregnancy, but in the back of my head, I'm wondering if it's jsut false hope.

Hugs to you - it's scary to be pregnant after a loss, but you are pregnant again!

[mamasthree]

I, too, am very anxious. I've had 1 loss and 3 successful pregnancies.

[mamatowill]

Oh I have had two losses and I am trying not to stress over this one. I am constantly running to the bathroom and checking for blood. I am not having any real symptoms but according to one calculator I am only 4 weeks 2 days so I probably shouldn't be expecting any but that is what happened before my last loss also. I can be there with you and wish you a wonderful ultrasound. Plus I got a heartbeat at 5 weeks 6 days- don't panic if it is slower than it should be since the heart is just starting to gear up.

[mclisa]

I lost a baby in between E and C. I was nervous all throughout the first weeks with C and also with S (and this time too!)

Good luck at your u/s!

[2happymamas]

Our baby is beautiful! Granted, all we could see was a little ball, but it was a beautiful dot. Best of all, the little dot had a heartbeat! We even have two pictures.

I am 5 weeks, 5 days. The heartbeat often does not show until six weeks, so we are great. The sac actually measured 6 weeks, 2 days. Nice, huh?

We have another ultrasound in three weeks. They said to bring a blank video tape and we can have our baby on tape!

[LoganBsMom]

congrats!!!

[KatyLinda]

Congrats on seeing your little one!!!!!

I'm a nervous mess too I can't wait to see the HB in a few weeks so that I can relax!!! Guess we can obsess together

[A Mothers Love]

Originally Posted by 2happymamas

Our baby is beautiful! Granted, all we could see was a little ball, but it was a beautiful dot. Best of all, the little dot had a heartbeat! We even have two pictures.

I am 5 weeks, 5 days. The heartbeat often does not show until six weeks, so we are great. The sac actually measured 6 weeks, 2 days. Nice, huh?

We have another ultrasound in three weeks. They said to bring a blank video tape and we can have our baby on tape!

Great!!! So happy for you

[laurelg]

I am a mess, too. This is my first pregnancy, so I haven't experienced a loss - I don't know if that makes it stranger that I have so much anxiety, or not... but it's there, and it's ugly.

I do the blood check thing, too. For the first few days after my BFP, I was nauseous on and off all day. The last couple of days I've felt fine. That scares me. I am afraid of losing the baby and not having an immediate miscarriage and finding out at my first appointment - which isn't until 12 weeks - that I had a loss now. I'm seriously considering asking for an earlier appointment so I don't go insane.

I know, logically, that whatever is going to happen will happen regardless of how many ultrasounds I have, or how nauseous I feel, or anything else. I know it's out of my control (other than taking good care of myself) and I have to hand it over to God/the universe. I know these things, but I am having a very difficult time accepting these things.

The process leading up to my pregnancy was a time where I felt more in touch with my body than I ever have in my life - I was charting, and knew so much about my cycles, and was so confident. I've gone from that to feeling completely out of control.

[mom2annika]

Laurel. It is hard to realize we're not in control. However, IF you are really unable to let it go, there are places like crisis pregnancy centers where they will very often do walk-in ultrasounds. I had a friend (who wasn't having a crisis pregnancy by any stretch of the imagination) who went to one just to see the heartbeat and have some visual confirmation before the OB appointment.

[heatherh]

Yeah!! for a little bitty heartbeat

[quietserena]

Yup been there. Only in the past year or so have I started to think of those as my children. Both of mine were early losses so I barelly had time to get attached to the idea of being pregnant.

A certain amount of nervousness is ok and healthy even. Keeps you on your toes.

This group is here for you though.

[leerypolyp]

Congratulations!