I am worried that I dont talk enough...

[ians_mommy]

...everything I read emphasizes the importance of talking to your baby. I spend 50 hours a week at work talking and talking and talking. When I get home I am all talked out. I hardly answer the phone and say very little to DH (luckily he understands).
Anyway, my DS is 6 mo and I am worried I dont talk enough to him. When I am home I wear/carry him everywhere and we co-sleep. I spend lots of time playing with him, but do not "say" much while we play.
I know my DH chats with him alot and so does his Nanny...am I short-changing my little boy by being a "quiet" source of love? If so, help me find my chatty self!

[NJ*Doula]

: I'm not a big talker, either.

[ians_mommy]

Originally Posted by GathererGirl

: I'm not a big talker, either.

At least there is one more like me.
My sister talked constantly to me niece, who now does have a very good vocabulary. She tells me, "just talk about anything...what you are doing at that moment is fine". But that is not me. I feel silly just filling the air with useless babble. It annoys me when people "talk" without "saying" anything KWIM...so doing it to my child does not come natural to me.

[Aeress]

Really, it isn't just the talking, it is the communication, allowing your babe to respond to you. You also use body language and many non verbal words throughout your interactions with you, which is just as important as talking. Don't worry, your babe will be just fine!

[MommytoTwo]

I didnt talk much to DS1 and the child will not. stop. talking. Dont worry.

[justthinkn]

I've had this thought, too, but always try to remind myself that there are lots of other quiet mothers out there, and presumably their kids turned out fine! I do try to respond to her when she talks, but don't kill myself to initiate convo when it doesn't feel natural to me...

[Tithonia]

Thanks for posting this question! I'm not a big talker, either, and it doesn't feel right to me to try to force myself to talk to DD when I don't have anything to say. It's encouraging to hear from others like us. :

[schreiberwriter]

I was like that with my DS. He just needed to be with me. Now he's almost 3 & very chatty so it's hard not to talk to him. It's a season.

[richella]

Talking is good for children, reading too much stuff about parenting can have a detrimental effect on just about everyone.

You're doing fine.

[nursingmom]

When my first child was a baby, I used to read to him. When he stared to crawl, he would crawl to books and gesture for me to read. I'm not a much of a talker myself. So, reading forced me to talk to him. Simple words with simple pictures are great books for babies.

[*jeanine*]

nak
i didn't talk much to ds. it seemed silly to talk...well, basically to myself. i was his primary caregiver, and played with him a lot, but did not do the whole "see the tree? it's a big tree. a big tree with green leaves...blahblahblah". he learned to talk anyway. he wasn't an *early* talker, but not late, either. he's 6 now and pefectly "normal". dd1 heard a lot more talking - me and ds to each other, as well as to her. she did not talk any earlier than ds did. she's 3 now, and just as "normal" as ds. i talk all the time to dd2 (she's the only one who won't talk back ). she's 8 months - no words yet, and i don't expect any for quite a while. maybe when they say "talking" they really mean "interacting".

[Liquesce]

I'm a very, very quiet person by nature. My son (about a year old) is a fiend of constant babbling, on the other hand, with a deep array of sounds and sound combinations going for him ... he may not have words yet, but there's no indication that his speech development is the least bit delayed for having a quiet mother. Really, unless you live in an isolation chamber, a baby really can't help but to hear enough speech.

[Ironica]

The research shows that there's a correlation between (1) how much total speech is directed at the baby; (2) the number of different words used when speaking to baby; and (3) the proportion of that speech which is phrased positively... and how quickly the child develops verbal skills. It sounds like between the nanny and your DH, your baby gets talked to with plenty of different words in a positive context, and will benefit from that. You worry about being the best mom you can in the time you have with her, and if that doesn't include gabbing, so be it!

[MilkTrance]

I'm quiet, too, but I make sure to acknowledge, as much as I can, DS's babbling directed at me or my husband. I think that's really important -- that DS knows we will listen to him when he does talk. I hate it when people ignore/talk over babies when they're trying SO hard to communicate.

But if you're naturally a quiet person, I don't think that you need to blather on about nothing just because you read that you should. My baby (11 mos) seems to be able to tell when DH and I are talking to him or about something concerning him, and when DH and I are talking about something completely different (and boring to him).

[amberskyfire]

I don't talk much, either, so this is what I do: when we are nursing or having any kind of "quiet time," I read books to her. I like to read novels and magazines, so whenever I'm reading something, I read it out loud to her. It helps because I run out of things to say after a while.

You could record yourself talking and have someone play it for her when you are not home.

[ipeabody]

Read aloud, sing along to the radio. I worked with non-verbal kids for years and just got in the habit of describing what I was doing while I was doing it out loud. My 10 month old loves it and it's second nature to me now. But I don't think there is any harm in being quiet, as long as all the non-verbal communication is there.

[dziwozony]

yes, i think probably forcing akward small talk will not provide significant advantages for your baby! just being there with her, responding to her efforts at communication, whether physically or verbally, will be what matters. if you were the primary caregiver & she didn't hang out with many other adults i would say maybe you should find ways to help the words flow, but as it is i'm sure you're babe is doing fine =)

[Miranda2r14]

Originally Posted by MommytoTwo

I didnt talk much to DS1 and the child will not. stop. talking. Dont worry.

I lol'd.

edit to elaborate why I lol'd. This is me. I'm a very quiet non-verbal person as well. I can already tell at 4.5 months my DS is going to be a high energy non-stop talker. (Like his dad) He bounces and will not stop moving and is constantly babbling at me. I believe he's going to drive me insane later.

[dancebaraka]

Originally Posted by richella

Talking is good for children, reading too much stuff about parenting can have a detrimental effect on just about everyone.

You're doing fine.

[Liquesce]

Originally Posted by Miranda2r14

I lol'd.

edit to elaborate why I lol'd. This is me. I'm a very quiet non-verbal person as well. I can already tell at 4.5 months my DS is going to be a high energy non-stop talker. (Like his dad) He bounces and will not stop moving and is constantly babbling at me. I believe he's going to drive me insane later.

We've got twin-soul kids.

Actually it's my son who makes *me* talk more, not the other way around ... when there's a very small person in front of you constantly chatting away, even if it is nonsensical babbling, it's impossible to just not respond at all.