Skinny mamas-

[rhubarbarin]

I am not quite ready to TTC, but I am thinking hard about it.

I am very concerned about my low weight, my fertility and my health during (future) pregnancy.

Are there any very skinny moms/TTC future moms here? What do your doctors tell you? What have you found to be true yourself about concieving/having kids when you are naturally underweight?

I've been stasitcally underwight my whole life. I had eating issues as a child and teen, but now in my 20s I have mostly overcome them (meaning I get enough to eat and eat healthy, but I don't enjoy it).. however I think I stunted my growth a little. I come from a slim family, but no one is as thin as me. I have fat on me, and I've had a regular period since I got it, but my bones protrude and I look fragile.

I am trying to gain weight, eating 2500-3000 calories a day, but it's slow going. Obviosly part of the problem is a very fast metabolism. I'd like to get my BMI in the 'healthy' range (18.5 plus) just to be safe, but I'd have to gain at least another 9 lbs and I seem to be stuck the last few months. I weigh more now than I ever have, which is something at least.


Looking at all the super-skinny actresses and models who have kids, I think most of the hype I hear about being 'too thin' and pregancy is just that - hype, and not true for everyone.. of course if you are underweight due to an ED or poor nutrition, you will have problems. But there are plenty of people who are skinny their whole lives..

Still, could use some advice.

[lilgreen]

I would guess that you're fine as long as you're having regular periods, but I would also recommend charting your basal body tempuratures for a cycle to make sure you're ovulating. I have conceived while underweight. The baby will take what it needs, so as long as you're ovulating my guess is that your weight shouldn't matter. Have you asked your doctor? Good luck!

[nighten]

Well, I am 5'2" and weighed 99 lbs before we started trying to conceive. I have a very small frame but was absolutely underweight. Having your periods regularly doesn't mean your body is as healthy as it should be to support growing a baby, honestly. Mine wasn't.

I worked hard to gain weight, eating lots of healthy high fat foods (started cooking with olive oil and butter, eating high fat yogurts, etc.), until I'd gained 10 pounds. Even then it took us about two years to get pregnant.

The thing is, that as I understand it, you baby will basically receive its primary nourishment off your body's stores -- meaning not just the accumulated fat, but also the stores of nutrients. The first trimester this is especially true I think. So it's very important to have enough fat and nutrients in your body before you get pregnant, to help ensure your child receives all the nourishment needed from the very beginning.

Also, you may encounter lots of nausea or vomiting, and if you're starting out from an already less than ideal weight, then you're looking at potential medical intervention to assist in nourishing your fetus.

Bottom line, pregnancy is the one time in your life when it's best to have more than the ideal weight starting off, if possible. At least that's what I think. I'd much rather deal with weighing more than I'm used to, but knowing with certainty that my body is a healthier place for my baby, than to be one of those skinny actresses, you know?

Anyway, I'm not big on the BMI thing as it seems very off to me in terms of realistic body types, oftentimes. But it sounds like you believe you're underweight, so if I were you and considering trying to get pregnant, I'd be all about gaining weight now, and focusing on putting healthy nutrients into your body.

Besides, breastfeeding oftentimes will make the added weight (plus any gained in pregnancy) fall off easily. It doesn't for everyone, but it did for me -- I have a very high metabolism, and actually ended up around 100 pounds again, so I started increasing my caloric intake drastically to ensure I didn't get too thin again.

I'm back to 109 now and very happy with it. I have a lot more meat on me than I used to, but I know I look so much healthier, and I feel better. I also don't ever want to be stressing about looking "too" thin because I don't want my daughter to pick up on that being any kind of an ideal for her to aspire to. So for me it wasn't just gaining weight to get pregnant. It was changing my views on what a healthy weight for my body is, so my baby could be healthy growing inside me, and grow up with a healthier outlook on her body too.

Good luck! And hope that help.

[rhubarbarin]

I think I will start charting, it seems like I would think it was fun as well as informative.I have checked my cervical mucus before but not consistantly, so I have no idea if I am ovulating.

I'd much rather deal with weighing more than I'm used to, but knowing with certainty that my body is a healthier place for my baby, than to be one of those skinny actresses, you know?

ITA. That's why I am worrying about this now, before I start trying - I want to take care of myself first, and have a very healthy body, as preparation for having a child. I would feel ridiculously curvy just to put on 10 or 15 lbs, but I could gain 30 and still be considered slim by most people.. so, the plumper the better if I can manage it! I prefer the curvier look anyway, cause I never got to have it.. would love to have breasts and thighs and stuff. No pointy bones would be nice too.

I am 5'5" and was 94-95 lbs a few months ago. After calorie counting and meal planning I am now 102 but haven't gained in over a month.

If I am eating 2500-3000 calories of healthy foods (fruits, veg, whole grains, eggs, large amounts of nuts and olive oil), exercising moderately to build muscle, and am still not gaining that much weight.. I mean, should I just assume it's not gonna happen right now? I am happy to have gained what I did, but I can't physically eat more in a day. Eating 3000 cals is tough, I feel stuffed and uncomfortable and my body gets overheated. I am trying to stick with it in the hopes that it will have long-term results, or at least that it is good for me.. but it doesn't always feel good. I've got energy to burn though.

I haven't been tested in several years, but last time I was my bloodwork, bone density etc came back as normal - and I was even thinner then.

Maybe I am just a genetic freak. I know it's not my thyroid.

[nighten]

Well, the added exercise is burning off those calories, to some degree. I'd stick with normal portions of high fat foods so you're not feeling overstuffed. Maybe try some high fat yogurt? Or smoothies? The Liberte brand of yogurt is delicious and has 45% daily sat. fat per serving. It'll add on the pounds in no time.

[Lauren31]

I know what you mean-- I am thin too-- although 128 lbs and 5'5'' and I have not gotten my period since I went off BCP. My doc said I am totally fine and it's normal but ugh what is normal about no period!? I think its bc I am too skinny but she said no. I think 5'5'' and 95 lbs is very small though, but since you DO still have your period, I guess you must be doing something right. My mom conceived when she was 90 lbs and 5'6'' and gained about 60 lbs with her pregnancy and ended up with a great 125 lbs. Good luck, let us know what you find out.

[Lauren31]

oooh also-- since I have been TTC I have gained about 18 lbs in three months. I have eaten lots of dark chocolate when I get the craving and most importantly seconds of pasta, chicken, fish, veggies and I top parmesean reggiano cheese on EVERYTHING. Every calorie counts

[rhubarbarin]

Well, the added exercise is burning off those calories, to some degree. I'd stick with normal portions of high fat foods so you're not feeling overstuffed. Maybe try some high fat yogurt? Or smoothies? The Liberte brand of yogurt is delicious and has 45% daily sat. fat per serving. It'll add on the pounds in no time.

I am exercising the same as I always do - some crunches and push-ups 3x per week, walking the dogs every day, and sometimes running with my big dog.

The problem I have is, I was eating normal portions of high-fat foods when I weighed 95. When I started counting calories I found I was eating 1500-2000. So I upped it to 2500.. then to 3000 when I wasn't gaining very fast.. it's just frustrating. 'Normal' amounts of food maintain my body at under 100 lbs.

Anyway, I'm not stressing about it! I am going to start charting this month and find out if I am ovulating.

[crazyeight]

Originally Posted by Lauren31

I know what you mean-- I am thin too-- although 128 lbs and 5'5'' and I have not gotten my period since I went off BCP. My doc said I am totally fine and it's normal but ugh what is normal about no period!? I think its bc I am too skinny but she said no. I think 5'5'' and 95 lbs is very small though, but since you DO still have your period, I guess you must be doing something right. My mom conceived when she was 90 lbs and 5'6'' and gained about 60 lbs with her pregnancy and ended up with a great 125 lbs. Good luck, let us know what you find out.

you can have the weight i am trying to loose! haha. i am 132 (as of this morn) and 5'5". i want to get to 125. mostly just love handles and firming up the butt/thigh areas. i am certainly average and in good form but i KNOW that the places i want to loose is just extra. i'm looking at ttc in nov so i want to loose these 8ish lbs by then (and then destroy all my hard work ) but your welcome to them!

also just as an aside...eating a ton more fruits and veggies won't help nearly as much as fatty meats. i would also try healthy "cinnabuns" (cream cheese frosting, whole wheat grains, instead of raisins use chopped dried paypaya/mixed fruit)

[clavicula]

I am 5'6 and around 118-120 lbs @ 13 weeks pregnant. Actually, as I'm getting skinnier (nursing since 2005 I guess), I'm getting more fertile. Just look at my sig.

[redclover]

rhubarbarin... sounds like in exactly the same spot.
i had my first in 2005 and now am ttc again, but am running into the same old spots from years ago. our fertility is majorly affected by our body's well being. including that extra padding that some of us mamas just don't have. i'm 5'9 and just 105 or so and find it incredibly difficult to keep on the lbs. because of it i have cycles where i just don't O and others with really short luteal phases.

it's interesting to find other women who have had past eating issues and how it has affected us in our lives as mamas. struggling to get healthy for another pregnancy, but also trying to teach my daughter about healthy eating and trying to not pass on this...well...whatever it is.

we eat so many avocados around here i think we'll turn green or explode. olive oil, butter, coconut oil. grass fed lamb, beef, poultry. fatty and oily fish, eggs, nut butter (TRY SUN BUTTER...). home made raw whole milk yogurt. those are the things we eat and try to build up this skinny mama and her tumbly three year old. (and have you tried that greek yogurt FAGE? unbelievable. i was about 99 lbs til i started eating that stuff. its like sour cream.) stoneyfield vanilla ice cream and hot chocolate from whole milk and homemade granola.

[rhubarbarin]

Hi redclover, thanks for posting. I still don't always make enough time to eat properly, but I am aware and always make up for it the next day! Counting calories has worked better than anything else. I am incredibly thankful I never developed a 'textbook' eating disorder (anorexia/bulemia/exercise mania).. mine is NOS, and I used it since very early childhood to cope with depression/anxiety. Since my mental health is so much better now, my eating has followed.

I just need to stick with it and keep on stuffing my face. I have really enjoyed gaining so far, I feel very beautiful with my new curves - I feel like I am slowly becoming a woman (only 10-12 years late!).

I hope to be able to teach my future kids to eat healthy while also eating what they like, when they want to. My mom was very controlling about food and it was just so bad for me.

I do hope I haven't damaged my fertility, but I plan on adopting whether or not I have bio kids.. so won't be the end of my world if I can never sustain a pregnancy.. still, will try to build a healthy body either way!

[indie]

Originally Posted by rhubarbarin

I am 5'5" and was 94-95 lbs a few months ago. After calorie counting and meal planning I am now 102 but haven't gained in over a month.

I was 5'5" and 95 pounds when I got pregnant with my first. I had a healthy pregnancy and natural birth. Even though I had bad morning sickness the entire pregnancy, I still gained 45 pounds. I've always been a big eater. I ate pretty normally (for me) but my metabolism adjusted and I was able to gain even though I was getting less (because of the throwing up).

At the onset of the second pregnancy I was 97 pounds. Morning sickness was worse than most people but better than first pregnancy. I ate more than the first time (just because I was hungry a lot) and gained 60 pounds. I was also breastfeeding during the first half of the pregnancy.

Third (and last!) pregnancy I was 108 pounds when I got pregnant. Morning sickness was worse than most people, but much better than first two pregnancies. I gained 50 pounds and ate a lot. I was breastfeeding during the entire pregnancy.

All three kids were completely healthy. The first two were around 8.5 pounds and the third was 9.5 pounds.

I just wanted to let you know that it is possible for us skinny women to do this. A lot of people tried to discourage me. If you are ovulating then that is the main thing.

Originally Posted by rhubarbarin

Maybe I am just a genetic freak. I know it's not my thyroid.

I'm quite sure that I'm a genetic freak. If I were a French model I'd be banned from the runways. The best thing about the months after birth is that people stop harassing me about my weight. I'm losing weight and nursing two kids so it won't be long before they start in on me again.

[zonapellucida]

I am very fertile and considered underweight so I wouldn't overly stress about it

[Mrsboyko]

Fertile and underweight here too. I have an 18 month old I am nursing and I am thinner than I have been since grade school. I have never been big (usually around 115 lbs) but being closer to the 100 mark is scary for me. I eat constantly, but BF'ing just strips it off of me. I did get pregnant in Jan when I was about 104. Before i realized I was preg, I thought i was finally managing to gain a little. I made it up to 110 before i miscarried (not due to weight, it was a blighted ovum). Now I ma fluxing between 107 and 109, which feels better for me. It is amazing how even a few lbs can make you feel better. There is a huge difference in how i feel about my body between weighing 104 (way to skinny, bones sticking out) and 108 (normal feeling)

[redclover]

hey-
do any of you guys (gals) have a crazy short luteal phase because of being skinny? i keep wondering if it is related. when i got pg with my first i was having 21 day cycles (i wasn't charting) but it didn't seem to prevent me from conceiving. (we mighta just hit the mark...) but it makes me wonder... (now they are to 25 days...give or take....)

seriously, i was so relieved when i was hauling around my little monkey and bfing for two years when people left me alone about my weight. like we need that crap, right? i eat so much all the time everyone wonders where it goes. (like any of it is anybody else's business anyway.) i'm so relieved you all exist. so nice to read other people's lives that sound so familiar.
phew.

[rhubarbarin]

Yay! Glad to see some more people like me! I see them in RL but I won't go up to someone and make comments about their weight - hate it when people do it to me.

zonapellucida you are having your 9th child? Wow.

I get a lot of negative comments about my body. So rude. And misinformed! Someone told me it was impossible to get your period unless you were 110 lbs. Haha. Well I am living proof that is untrue.

But when doctors are telling you you'll never be able to concienve unless you gain 30 lbs.. it's scary. I FEEL healthy but I'm constantly getting told I'm 'sick'. Psh.

[indie]

My doctor stood gape jawed when I birthed my first 8.5 pound baby. She kept shaking her head and saying "I never would have thought" over and over. She was sure that the baby would be 6 pounds at the most. Doctors don't know everything.

[ann_of_loxley]

I was classes as underweight before I had my son. I have never had any eating issues though - I was just naturally thin. I hated it though - if people didnt know me, they would make rude comments about me being anorexic, etc...and my friends that did know me just joked I must have worms!

Well...my DS was concieved on one night and only one night! lol...About 5 days before I ovulated as well (looking back and doing the maths - maybe even longer than that if possible!)...But I gained a LOT of weight in pregnancy! 6 stone to be exact... (thats 14lbs to the stone)... This was a lot for me. My son was also near 11lbs too.

However...Ive lost 4 stone of that since. And, as soon as my son was born, I was back to eating whatever I wanted and not gaining any weight. Only problem is...its harder then for me to lose weight. Oh well...thats life I guess. It was a huge adjustment for me though going from my barely a-not-even-really-still-shopping-at-kid-gap size 0 to what I am now! lol

[mamamillet]

Another skinny momma here. I weighed 88 lbs (5 ft tall) when I got pregnant with DS. I gained close to 50 lbs and had a 7.5 lb baby 2 weeks early. I eat pretty well-occasionally skip meals (mainly breakfast) but do eat well and high fat otherwise. I also have always had my periods, but was a smoker before getting pregnant so was probably underweight to some extent due to that.