In our 40s and due in January - Page 3

[janesmommy]

Hi Everyone!

I'm 42 and EDD is Feb. 5, is that close enough? I feel pretty good so far. I had a HORRIBLE headache the past several days but I actually am beginning to think it was Prozac withdrawal.

Ironically this was totally an unplanned surprise for us, go figure. When we first found out we freaked and weren't so happy about it. Now, a mere week later I just want everything to be okay and am trying not to worry about the many possibilities of the oh so insulting "advanced maternal age".

Anyone else feel this way? I am planning a nuchal screen, not even sure what that is. Had an amnio w/ dd but wanted to be less invasive this time around, hopefully everything will be great. I don't have a history of miscarriage and dd is perfect so I'm crossing my fingers.

[juneau]

Welcome, janesmommy! Congratulations on your pregnancy.

I just have some words of warning in regards to testing. If you wouldn't terminate, don't test! I had a nuchal scan when I was pregnant at 42 (this was a surprise pregnancy as well), and the results were ambiguous, but with a very high risk of Down syndrome or other chromosomal abnormality. My doctor pressured me into doing a CVS immediately. I got the results a week later and all was well. Unfortunately, I contracted an infection from the test and had a horrible septic miscarriage when my son was almost 15 weeks. I wanted to die myself, and nearly did. I have had two pregnancy losses since then, one was an ectopic (also life-threatening) that may have been caused by scarring from the previous infection.

I would just urge anyone not to start down that road unless you really know what you are getting yourself in for. I wouldn't wish what happened to me on anyone, and I try to tell as many people as possible. I've never met anyone or heard of anyone who had my experience and yet we must be out there since the risk of miscarriage after CVS is elevated.

I too, was trying to do things the less-invasive way. I didn't want to do CVS initially, and yet, when I got those nuchal results back, I panicked -- looking back, I blame the doctor, too, for pushing me. My dh was against it but I talked him into it; one of the things I regret most in my life.

[Prism]

oh juneau that's horrible! what you've been through.

[hockeylover]

Wow Juneau! I'm so sorry for what you went through. I can't imagine how you're still standing, especially emotionally.

Janesmommy, congratulations. The nuchal test is a blood test where they test for certain levels (they test for a bunch of things that I can't remember at the moment other than trisomy-18). There's also an ultrasound where they measure the nape of the baby's neck. Apparently, if the neck is thicker, that's an indication of Down's Syndrome. So the measurement combined with the blood levels vs Mother's age, determines the odds that there might be a problem.

I had a nuchal test with DD and my odds came back very high (which was good) for my age. But I was also 38 and nervous and didn't want to take any chances. If I recall, the "average" odds at my age (that over 35 magic number) was 60 to 1. After my nuchal test, combined with my bloodwork, my odds were like 550 to 1. I personally, wasn't interested in a CVS and my doctor said the only way to know "for sure" was an amnio, which we did. All was good. I'm scheduled for a nuchal test in two weeks and based on my situation (donor egg), I fully expect to very high odds. Assuming, that's correct, I don't think we'll do an amnio this time. But that's only because of my specific situation. If we were with my eggs, then yes I would test to know for sure.

Juneau, I'm still in shock from your story. I hope you're a little excited about your U/S next week. Oh, as for me today. I'm an official graduate from the land of fertility doctors. He burned a DVD (so I can show my DH who's out of town) of the two heartbeats which were going strong. Took measurements and we're right on target. I gave hugs to my doctor and the main nurse that I've been dealing with and I move on to my regular OB who I'll see in 2 weeks and get on a schedule from there.

[juneau]

Sorry, everyone, if I shocked or scared you. I won't judge anyone who decides to test but please go in with your eyes open. My doc had lots of resources for me if I tested + for Down syndrome but I never heard a peep from her after I lost my baby. I wonder sometimes how I made it through, too. I really almost didn't.

But here I am, at 44, two years later (the anniv. of my loss is in four days), nine weeks pregnant, with a (so far) healthy little bean.

However, I have to complain because I am miserable. I am having the worst asthma attack of my life and had to change meds because of being pregnant. The new meds will take a few days to kick in and meanwhile I can't stop coughing long enough to fall asleep!!

The nausea seems pretty well-controlled with Zofran but now I am on milk of magnesia and colase for constipation; combined with an antibiotic for possible strep, and two inhalers for asthma, I am a walking pharmacy at a very vulnerable time in my pregnancy.

If bean and I are still together and healthy in January it truly will be a miracle.

Congrats, hockeylover, on an end to infertility-land and your graduation to a regular OB!

[doulamomvicki]

Bumping us up.

How is everyone doing?

juneau I am so sorry that happened. Thank you for sharing, that made me say a big "no" when my ob offered the cvs to me today.

[juneau]

Yay, Vicki, the power of "no"!

I am up and down. Today up; but Sunday I spent the whole day in bed. By LMP I am 10 weeks today; by ovulation, 10 weeks tomorrow. I have my first official OB appointment today and he's insisting on another ultrasound. I was really against it at first, but now have gotten used to the idea. But it's creating more anxiety than anything and I'm going to ask for NO MORE "routine" ultrasounds. We'll also probably have a discussion about testing of all kinds, which I am planning to say NO to. Wish me luck...

I'm still on Zofran though sometimes I can go a whole day without taking it. I don't feel as if I have turned a corner yet, though. When I tried to go two days without, I threw up brushing my teeth. Yuck! Although I must say, I am no longer the miserable wretch I was last time I posted, hooray!

Dd started part-time daycare yesterday, which was a really hard decision for me, since I have been a SAHM since birth. But she seems to be doing well, and I am enjoying the extra time just to rest.

Yesterday was the 2nd anniversary of the loss of my son, and I actually forgot until today, which I guess is a good thing. Although the upcoming u/s makes me worry that something will be wrong today and brings up the sadness of that loss all over again. Oy, I need to stop worrying.

How are you feeling, Vicki? Still taking Zofran? How about you, Hockeylover? Still feeling good? Prism? Janesmommy? Clementine?

[hockeylover]

Juneau, I hope your doctor's appointment goes well today. I know how terrified you are about the ultrasound but if you do this one and know that all is going swimmingly, then I can't imagine that you'd have to have another internal ultrasound. By the time you go back, it should be belly time and just the regularly scheduled ones at, what 20 and 36 weeks. I can't even remember. LOL. I'm glad you were distracted and didn't remember the two year anniversary. It's so brutally sad and you should never forget but at the same time you have something and someone very exciting to look forward to. Channel that positively if you can. I know, easier said that done.

I know it's hard putting DD in daycare but it might be a good thing. Let her get used to other kids so that the baby might not be so traumatic and heck, the way you're feeling, it gives you a few hours of quiet time to rest. You really need that. I'm sorry that you're feeling so miserable. But if you're 10 weeks, you're in the home stretch. You should be coming out of this misery in the next 2-3 weeks.

As for me, I've been doing pretty well overall. Tired of course (if I'd get off the computer, I'd take a nap). MY DH was out of town for two weeks and thankfully came home yesterday. I had a miserable weekend trying to get rid of a 5 day migraine. It was brutal beyond belief. I finally broke down and had a Caramel Frappaccino yesterday and that sugar and some caffeine rush seemed to break it. Go figure. Other that the usual tired, my biggest issue is when I get hungry. I'm instantly STARVING. There's no, "Oh I'll go get something in a minute". I need to eat now. I'm eating at all sorts of weird hours including one day last week when I woke up at 3:45A hungry and had to go eat some bread. And with all of that, I still haven't really gained any weight. Believe me, I'm trying. Geez. It'll catch up I have no doubt. I go see my regular OB next week and get on that schedule.

We told DD last night who was VERY excited at the thought of being a big sister. Then said said "I think I want a brother AND a sister." That blew DH away. She had said that to me before. So we told her that I'm going to have two babies and she thought that was great and starting coming up with names. We weren't sure how much she "got" it although she did kiss my belly and the babies goodnight. When I dropped her off at school today, she told her teacher "My Mommy has TWO (with fingers) babies in her belly." Her teacher was like "WHAT??" since we had a class family thing last night and no one knew. So I confirmed and it's all exciting. So yeah, I guess DD gets it after all.

I hope everyone else is feeling good, or actually crappy. That means those hormones are doing their thing. Off to take a nap...

[juneau]

Juls, that's so funny about your dd. We told mine early on but only because I was feeling so crappy and having to cut back SO far on nursing. Now she's worried about me being sick and always thinks of things that could make me better (ginger ale, ginger tea, etc.). She's so sweet. She does have a habit of blurting out our news, but lately she's been preoccupied with my asthma. She will go up to complete strangers and say, "My mommy has a asthma!" Too funny.

My dd wants a sister. I have a hunch it will be. We had the u/s this afternoon and to my great relief everything is exactly fine and beautiful! Yolk sac, heartbeat, wiggly baby, arm and leg buds, measuring right on schedule; everything you could hope for at 10 weeks. And the nurse practitioner I saw for my appointment agreed no more ultrasounds until 20 weeks. Yay! But I will see the OB every 3 weeks. I guess that's OK.

I'm glad you got your headache to go away. It sounds miserable. I have actually found caffeine, in small doses, extremely helpful for headaches during pregnancy in the past. None so far this time for me, but they plagued me during my second trimester with dd. A cola in the afternoon always did the trick.

[doulamomvicki]

I am still on the Zofran but I am trying to space it out as much as I can tolerate. It works well for my m/s but it makes me sooo tired.

Juneau Yah! I am so glad your u/s was perfect.

Juls Your dd sounds too cute!

[juneau]

Vicki, how often are you taking the Zofran? I'm trying to go every other day, but sometimes I can and sometimes not.

[juneau]

Two steps forward... and one back

I cooked a meal yesterday! An actual made-from-scratch quiche! And ate it! :...

... but then I threw up before breakfast this morning.

[doulamomvicki]

I am bumping us up

Prism I saw your other post in the ddc. I am so sorry mama, prayers and love to you

Juneau Is your m/s lessening?

How is everyone else doing? I am actually doing pretty well, only taking Zofran every so often. My biggest problem is being so tired all the time, which I can handle.

[juneau]

Hi Vicki! I am mostly off Zofran but suffering terribly from asthma right now. It's kicking my butt! I had it bad when I was pregnant with dd, but for about 2 1/2 years after her birth, I was completely symptom-free. Now I am taking scads of medications and still ailing. Wish I could get back to an even keel!

Prism .

Hockeylover, how are you???

[hockeylover]

Hi there!

I've barely been on the computer lately and MDC has been one of my regular haunts to get neglected. Shame on me, but I'm back and determined to check in on all of our progress.

How's everyone feeling? Juneau, I've really been wondering about your morning sickness since it really seemed to get you bad. Vicki, how about you? How are you doing?

AFM, I'm doing well. I'm starting week 13 (aren't we all about the same?) and we've finally pretty much told the world. I was waiting until I saw my regular OB last week and then saw the perinatologist the next day. With twins, I guess I've got a lot of people watching over me. We had our BUN/nuchal fold test and the doctor was thrilled with what he saw. Based on the fact that my donor was 24 and the neck thickness was very thin, he sees no reason why my results won't be very low. I haven't heard back on the bloodwork yet. So assuming that the odds come back very low, I see no reason to have an amnio this go around which makes me happy. Who needs the two sticks? I'm still feeling a little tired but that probably has as much to do with me staying up too late than the two beans in my belly. I'm definitely starting to show although I've really only gained about 5 pounds. Everything has shifted so I'm wearing maternity clothes as much out of comfort as necessity. The bigger boobs are the biggest annoyance so far (and I'm not that big) LOL.

Prism, big hugs to you. We're here for you.

Hope everyone is doing well and feeling good now that we're coming out of the 1st trimester. And I hope the summer heat doesn't wilt any of us.

[juneau]

Hockeylover, welcome back. We've missed you! I am feeling less nauseated and I really thought I was done throwing up with this pregnancy, and then bam, it hit me again today -- between first and second breakfast (LOL). I guess that means I'm still pregnant -- I have been freaking out a little bit lately, and anxiously looking forward to my peri appt. next week.

Great news on the nuchal scan; no amnio, go go go!

I'm still recovering from asthma/bronchitis and so VERY tired. I just called my editor (I'm a journalist) and begged off a freelance assignment I'd been looking forward to for a long time. And I feel relieved about it instead of disappointed. I hope to feel well enough to do some writing in a few weeks; just not right now.

BTW, I am 12w2d today. Still not really in the mood to tell much of anyone about my pregnancy yet, but not hiding my belly, either. I've been wearing maternity clothes since 5 weeks! Due date is 1/14.

[hockeylover]

Thanks! I missed you all too and just didn't motivate to be on the computer more than I had to be. I should be sleeping. What else is new?

Juneau, I'm glad you're still feeling nauseous since yeah, those hormones are raging but even I'm "enough already" for you. You should be done with it. Were you this sick for your first? I barely had any nausea with my DD. And only slightly more this time but I think it's as much as an empty stomach. As soon as I eat something, it pretty much passes. Nothing close to actually getting sick, thank goodness. I know you probably hate me, but I totally feel for you. I truly hope this is over for you in the next week as you pass out of the 1st trimester.

I'm glad you also feel relief that you got out of that one assignment. I work in freelance TV production so I get the idea of job to job and paycheck to paycheck. And the potential that if you turn something down, they may not come to you again. I had to beg off of a job today in November with one of the few directors that calls me first. Yes, it's for a good medical reason but still, I don't want to lose "my spot" as his first choice, even though 4 months is plenty of notice. I haven't worked since the middle of May and it was good for me. I needed the clear schedule to be there for DD since my DH has been out of town so much lately (he just left again tonight for a 12 day trip to Vietnam) and so that I could rest when I needed to. I start back on my regular summer show on Monday and luckily that schedule is very reasonable without stupid hours.

I think I'm about 1 week ahead of you on the "how far along are we" week count. My due date is going to be closer to December 20th I think since twins come 2-3 weeks early. My 40 week due date is January 9. I've been in maternity clothes for about a week. I've bought a few things since my last pregnancy was all winter and I have two friends that gave me two HUGE boxes that I have to through tomorrow. I know there are t-shirts in there which is worth it right there.

We started telling people officially about a week ago. I finally blogged it the other day as well so the few people that didn't know, probably know now. And I've been told that my big boobs gave me away a few weeks ago, even if no one actually questioned it to my face.

[juneau]

Hi Hockeylover,
I was really nauseated and tired with dd but only threw up once. This throwing up every day crap has really got me bummed. I am also really nauseated in the evening, which makes me want to just eat a few bites of dinner and lie down as soon as possible.

Dd told me this morning that she doesn't love me when I'm sick.

My actual delivery date may be a week or two early, depending on how things are going. It will be a planned C/S since I had extra surgery at dd's delivery (huge fibroid removed). Last time I was pg my doc said 38 or 39 weeks. I see him next week so I'll see what he says this time. Of course, as I said, it probably depends more on how things are going at the time.

Yeah, I'm bummed about the freelance stuff right now. I've only been working for two magazines since dd was born and was just starting to ramp up again with my favorite editor. He handed me a really choice assignment and I'm sad that I can't fill it. It's the first I've worked with him in a few years, but he's my absolute favorite person to work with. And I just found out the other magazine got canned -- right before I was to start working on a really interesting profile.

Oh well, such is life. I'm busy growing a new one.

What kind of TV production work do you do?

[amorifera]

I'm happy to be joining you all here. I'm 42 (will be 43 in September) and the baby is due January 10. The pregnancy was a surprise, but we are very happy about it (it will be my first) and plan to have the baby at home with a midwife. I'm unbelievably lucky to have made it to 13 weeks without any morning sickness. I do feel for you women who have to deal with that. Ugh!

[juneau]

Welcome, Laurel, and congratulations!!! How exciting to be having your first at 43! I had given up the idea of getting pregnant when I turned 40, after five years of TTC, including failed IVF. Surprise, six months later I was pregnant, naturally. Now I have been pregnant five times in my 40s! What's your story?

I am feeling better today. :