Neither parent has custody...child supoort?

[pentaxlady]

Hoping someone can help me.

DP has 2 children from his 1st marriage. Oldest DS is 18 and younger is 7. For almost a year DP couldn't find them but we recently did. DS2 is living in another state with is Aunt because his mother was incarcerated. DP was never notified about the incarcerations or that his child would be moving out of the state. DP's ex "signed over custody" to her sister even though DP has joint custody.

DP is going to court soon to modify child support since DS1 is now over 18. But what will happen with the child support for DS2 since the mother, the custodial parent, doesn't have custody anymore? As of March she is no longer incarcerated but doesn't have DS2 back and as DP understands she has no intentions to get him back. As of right now DP's EX is still collecting child support for both children even though once is 18 and not in school and the other she doesn't even have custody of.

DP would like to terminate all child support to the EX and pay the Aunt as long as DS2 is still in her care. But can they also hold the EX accountable for a portion of the child support?

*** A little more information because I know someone will ask ***
DP does intent to seek custody of his child since his mother is now a 2 times convicted cocaine addict but he has to modify the child support first in order to afford the custody case.

[Rosehip]

Oh man, poor kids! What a tumultuous situation. I think this is a situation where you need to proceed VERY carefully legally, b/c I'd guess these kids may be at risk for being taken into state custody. Get a lawyer ASAP and be confident she knows what she's doing in complicated custody cases.

It really sounds like your DP wants to do right by his kids, but he should document everything - everything. His efforts to locate and/or visit them, that he's stable, that he pays child support, etc. It seems logical that if the mother doesn't have custody she should not be receiving C/S, but of course I have no idea of how the law handles this. Was he somehow paying c/s when she was out of state?

I'm so sorry for you, DP, and the kids. So stressful!

[homewithtwinsmama]

I don't understand why he doesn't get the second child automatically when the mother went to jail. If he has joint custody he needs to just go get his child from the aunt. Make it a visit, then do an emergency custody petition (he can do this without a lawyer) and ask judge to make it permanent until mother is out of jail.

[pentaxlady]

Originally Posted by ToastyToes

Oh man, poor kids! What a tumultuous situation. I think this is a situation where you need to proceed VERY carefully legally, b/c I'd guess these kids may be at risk for being taken into state custody. Get a lawyer ASAP and be confident she knows what she's doing in complicated custody cases.

It really sounds like your DP wants to do right by his kids, but he should document everything - everything. His efforts to locate and/or visit them, that he's stable, that he pays child support, etc. It seems logical that if the mother doesn't have custody she should not be receiving C/S, but of course I have no idea of how the law handles this. Was he somehow paying c/s when she was out of state?

I'm so sorry for you, DP, and the kids. So stressful!

the oldest is 18 and on his own now. The 7 yr old, even though illegally, is in the Aunt's custody and is doing good. So no worry about the state.

Until the child support issue is handled he can not afford an attorney. It has to go back to court and be stopped. Just because she was incarcerated and does not have custody doesn't mean his child support to her stopped. He has to go back to court and have it stopped. It's being taken from his income tax and being garnished from his wages. Hopefully that will be over soon so that he can try and get his DS back here with him.

[pentaxlady]

Originally Posted by homewithtwinsmama

I don't understand why he doesn't get the second child automatically when the mother went to jail. If he has joint custody he needs to just go get his child from the aunt. Make it a visit, then do an emergency custody petition (he can do this without a lawyer) and ask judge to make it permanent until mother is out of jail.

How do you do this with no lawyer? I've been in my own custody battle with my EX but it's cost me over $25,000 in attorney fee's and we are still going. DP can not and will not ever be able to afford that.

The Aunt took him when the mother went to jail. The mother signed over her custody to her sister, the aunt, and then the aunt went and got a Judge to give her full custody so that the child could be enrolled in school. All the while they never contacted DP or told the Judge that DP had joint custody. It took him almost a year to find his DS.

The EX is now out of jail but she doesn't have the child, he's still in her sisters custody in another state.