Spin Off: sleeping thread/night time routine

[kjoy2]

What is your routine when LO wakes and feeds at night? We feed first, change dipes & reswaddle (at which point they are wailing), go back on the boob for a tiny bit, and then rock to sleep. anyone have a way to do nights w/out so much crying around diapers & swaddling?

At this point we're co-sleeping all 4 of us on a futon mattress in the living room b/c it gives us more space... th co-sleeper is in our small bedroom - wonder if we'll move there ever! i'm a bit concerned about developing a habit where they can't fall to sleep on their own, too. we can rarely put them down if they aren't already asleep - day or night - w/out crying, which is pretty hard w/2 (dh went to the store yesterday and found 3 crying girls upon his return )

[chely7425]

My LO used to scream his head off whenever he got his diaper changed, but that stopped around 3.5 weeks... not sure why but maybe he realized that sitting in a dirty diaper wasn't all the comfortable. Anyway, when he wakes up at night we change first, then feed him because the diaper change seems less disturbing to him when he first wakes up as opposed to shaking him out of his milky stupor by changing his diaper. Then if he seems content I set him in his bassinet, a lot of the time he will talk to himself for awhile and then fall asleep. If he fusses or seems upset I try giving him the boob again or bringing him in my bed for cuddles.

[splath]

nak

We change first, reswaddle and then feed. DD usually wakes me up with her noises before she starts crying though, so I'm able to get her changed with minimal crying. During the day though it's next to impossible to put her down, even after she's fallen asleep, because she wakes right back uop the second I put her down. so the only time I can get anything done is whrn she's in the sling. She'll usually go right to sleep in it and sleep for a few hours.

She's pretty good at falling back to sleep at night, as she typically falls asleep at the boob, and I can lay her down beside me. If not, I can sometimes get her to fall asleep on my shoulder and then can get her down tha t way.

[3for3hb]

For about the first month or so I turned a hair dryer on during diaper changes . at night it makes a huge difference. It is magical... instant-calm. I think it's disorienting to them to change their diaper at night and the white noise and warmth (I always made sure he's dry before putting the clean dipe on) relaxes them. (listen to me say them as if I have twins lol). Once he stopped pooping at night I didn't have to change his dipe at night but now he's super soaking his dipe so I do again.

Now that he's a little bigger nighttime changes don't bother him much at all so we forego the dryer. I change a diaper once during the night around 2 or 3 am if I can feel moisture/dampness in the wool soaker. SOmetimes the dampness is what wakes him anyway.

I think he's nursing about 3 times at night now. not bad but i still feel sleep deprived:yawning:

[Ironica]

When DS2 wakes me up, it's usually by beating on me and making little grunty noises (I'm a light sleeper). Depending on how wiped out I am, I either:

1) Attempt to nurse him back to sleep without doing anything else (this never works) until I wake up enough to deal with elimination

2) Check his diaper...
2a) If wet/poopy, change him, or wake up DH to change him while he's latched on (since anything requiring him to lie on his back tends to make him wail if his mouth isn't occupied... though we have a mobile over the changing table now that he loooooves, but that's in the office, not the bedroom)

2b) If he's *not* wet/poopy, I grab the lap potty, undiaper him, and nurse him while he's on the potty. He usually pees and sometimes poops (though I think he's mostly outgrown pooping at night already). When he seems done, I rediaper (again, getting DH's assistance if he's rousable) and nurse him back to sleep. I usually fall asleep before he is out enough to unlatch, so I end up sleeping in awkward positions. I've gotten lucky the last couple nights, though.

ETA: this may be changing soon; last night, he didn't pee AT ALL, which sorta freaked me out, but it does happen with some kids this early. He usually wakes once or twice (depending on how early we get in bed) during the night and once in the morning around 6 or 7, and then gets out of bed around 8 or 9.

ETA again: the reason this doesn't include any swaddling is because this baby is swaddle-proof. It worked for the first week or so, but now he just makes it a priority to free both arms, and that pretty much defeats the purpose (since his legs don't seem to startle him). We've used two types of Swaddle-Mes plus extra-large swaddling blankets; nothing seems to work.

During the day, we can get a few minutes here and there of him in the Kick 'n' Play or on the changing table (yeah, I know, terribly dangerous... but, *you* pick up a happy newborn who's tracking the mobile's progress around the circle, I double-dog dare ya), but he pretty much lives on the boppy on someone's lap, or in the Maya or my long wrap. I don't even *try* to put him down in bed for naps, because the bed is at the total opposite end of the house, and he'll sleep a lot less anyway. He'll sack out for 90 minutes at a time in the wrap on my chest, and then I can, ya know, actually DO stuff.

[treehuggermama]

Our LO is quite fussy in the evenings (well all day long but especially in the evenings) so when it is approaching "bedtime" which is between 8 and 9pm I change his diaper, swaddle him then give him the boob on the boppy. If I am lucky I can sneak him up into his bassinett and he'll sleep for 4-5 hours. If he is extra fussy after doing all of the above I pop him into my ring sling fully swaddled and walk around the house in the dark until he is out. He then transfers pretty easily out of it into the bassinett (I think because he is swaddled he doesn't startle awake when he is put down). During the day I have started doing the same thing when I think he needs a nap and so far so good.

[treehuggermama]

Oh and I guess I didn't answer your question for suggestions to decrease crying- I second the white noise recommendation. We have a small white noise maker that we use all the time. You have a choice of many different sounds including just plain white noise. Works like a charm.

[pixiepunk]

we don't swaddle, haven't swaddled any of our babies. they didn't really seem to like it, and it didn't seem to help at all, so i've never done it. i know it can really help some babies, but mine just never enjoyed it. though they do love to be worn, which is sort of the same concept... maybe because they're worn so much they don't desire the swaddling at night? dunno.

but generally speaking when Elowyn wakes up the first time in the night it's because she's hungry *and* wet. So i change her first, then nurse her lying down and we usually both fall asleep at that point. every so often she'll poop while she's nursing, so i have to change her again, but it's rare. she's not much of a night time pooper. she usually only wakes up one other time in the night, and that's because she's wet, but happily nurses once she's changed and falls back asleep at the boob.

Kjoy - i can only imagine how much harder it is with two, especially when it's your first time as a mom! my main advice is to take it one day at a time, and try not to worry too much about "if we do this now, they might never do it on their own." kids grow and change so much, and even if something you do now does turn into a 'habit' that you feel you must break away from at some later date and time, if it's not broken right now, don't worry about fixing it. just do what works and worry about the rest later. if you're all happy in bed together, do that. at some point if you're not all happy in bed together, change that. if nursing to sleep works, hurray! do it! some babies naturally stop doing that on their own - DS did when he was about 18 months old. other don't - like DD1, who i had to gently encourage away from that practice when she was about 20 months and i was pregnant and needed to sleep. i've always been amazed by babies you can just lay down in their bed and they'll just fall asleep. i've never had one. if you have one, yippee for you! but if you don't, which i think is more usual, find something else that works for now like rocking or nursing or slinging.

and speaking of slinging, have you tried wearing the babies down to sleep? obviously it'll still require both of you, or else you to get comfortable wearing one on the front and one on the back, but my babies konk out in the sling and can often be put down quite easily once they're asleep. so maybe that would work?

the first couple of months are soooo tiring, babies need so much when they're brand new. just try to get through each day at this point, and just as you start to emerge from the haze, things will start to get so much easier!

[Jennisee]

When DS was a newborn, when he woke up, I'd go to the bathroom while DH changed his diaper, one of us would re-swaddle him, I'd latch him on (both of us lying down), and then I'd drift off to sleep while he nursed.

Now, he's 7 weeks old, and all I do is latch him on and go straight back to sleep.

[3for3hb]

Originally Posted by pixiepunk

my main advice is to take it one day at a time, and try not to worry too much about "if we do this now, they might never do it on their own." kids grow and change so much, and even if something you do now does turn into a 'habit' that you feel you must break away from at some later date and time, if it's not broken right now, don't worry about fixing it. just do what works and worry about the rest later.

the first couple of months are soooo tiring, babies need so much when they're brand new. just try to get through each day at this point, and just as you start to emerge from the haze, things will start to get so much easier!

now THAT is golden advice for any mom, but especially first timers!!!!

[krizzanne]

Originally Posted by willemsmamma

now THAT is golden advice for any mom, but especially first timers!!!!

I 'third' that advice!

I also wanted to agree about the white noise, too...my dc#2 would cry for hours and the hair dryer/vaccuum cleaner were life savers!

Also, the probiotics (if you have not already used them).

but most of all: because I cannot imagine that all the advice in the world can really help ease having 2 newborns at once!! But, you know, you seem like a very energetic, in tune kind of person, so they picked a perfect mommy

[Organicavocado]

I hand him off to H when he starts fussing, and he goes and changes and gives him his yeast meds, then back to me in just a diaper. We both run really hot and keep each other super warm at night. Then we nurse, and fall asleep. Lather, rinse, repeat. He just sleeps in my arms all night. It took a while to get to this point but now I can actually be awake for 10 hours in a row without feeling like I'm going to die!

[KariM]

Well...I don't have twins so I imagine it's a lot easier at our house! Hats off to you mamas of twins.

Meghan is an easy baby and only wakes once during the nighttime. When she was a newborn (she's now 2 months old) she'd nurse, then I'd get up to change her diaper, then she'd nurse again. After I noticed she flipped herself over to her tummy to sleep I just helped her out and placed her on her tummy after the 2nd nursing.

Now we just put a double diaper on her at bedtime and, the lazy mama I am, I don't change her until her 5am nursing.

Her routine these days is to rouse a bit around 3:30am for a snack nursing. She's still asleep, but in a light sleep stage. She doesn't nurse much and usually only from one breast. Then she'll wake around 5ish and really nurse. I'll often get her up before that nursing to change her diaper then we'll settle back into bed for her long nursing. She'll sleep lightly for another 2-3 hours with frequent nursings. We usually get out of bed around 8am.

ETA: I've never swaddled any of my kids, but did "wear" all three of them. It makes my life so much easier! I can let the babies sleep in a sling or carrier and I go about my daily routine. The babies get plenty of sleep and I'm a happier mama!

We co-sleep at nighttime and I go to sleep when the baby goes to sleep. That's the rule in our house. I need my sleep and I don't care if the babies associate sleep with me. I'd much rather they learn to sleep with a human than attach to a blanket or toy.

My son "weaned" to independent sleeping and I'm sure that the girls will as well eventually.

I'm also in the "don't worry about the future - the future will take care of itself" camp. I do what works for our family and feels true to my heart. I advise other mamas to do the same for their babes!

[ORLY?]

NAK
TOTALLY TAKING IT ONE DAY AT A TIME.
Caleb is 2 months old and is now finally sleeping at a 5-6 hour stretch. Usually he wakes up aroung 3 to nurse, I just do the old side along position and sometimes he goes back to sleep sometimes not... then I put him in the swing and he is content and usually "zones out" and falls back to sleep for two more hours. He is a early to bed, early to rise kind of a baby.

BUT before we go to bed at night he FIGHTS it, he screams (oh, remember those whimpy crying days? ) and kicks out his swaddling for an hour usually.
IF ANY OF YOU MOMMAS HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM BEFORE BED...
ONE WORD...
EARPLUGS. If you can't stop a baby from wailing the least you can do is drown out the noise and stay sane while trying to comfort your
LO.

A WORD ON NIGHTTIME ROUTINES...
Don't feel bad if you don't have a stable routine at this point. Caleb's changes from week to week.

[elleystar]

Mathias has had a pretty set routine practically from birth. Bedtime-11:30 p.m., no matter what sort of napping/waking happened before that time. He sleeps for 2-2.5 hours at a shot, and wakes up to nurse. We get up and come out to the living room so DH can sleep, cause it's gonna be a while. We spend 1-1.5 HOURS nursing, changing dipe, nursing some more, while I lurk on MDC and DS. Crawl back to bed once he's asleep...couple hours later, repeat. Sigh.
I think he just had a growth spurt though, night before last he was awake even more than usual, and up every 1-1.5 hours! Last night though? He still woke about every 2, but after 15 minutes of nursing, not even finishing off one boob (!), he'd pass right out!
Also, thanks to my mom's suggestion this last weekend, I have been trying putting him down on his tummy for naps. Up until this point, he has had to be held to sleep at all times. Turns out he loves being on his belly! So at bedtime last night, I put him down in his never-used bassinet next to our bed and he spent the first couple hours in there. It was really nice just to be able to sleep in my normal position for once. I did miss him though, and brought him in to lay on my chest for the next shift!