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Stupid Things People Say at Births....

post #1 of 512
Thread Starter 
I thought this would get a laugh or two out of us.

At my sisters hospital birth my mom was holding one of her legs in the stirrups and at one of the moments that the OB paused from saying Push Push Push (mind you my mother and sisters H were yelling Push also) my mom exclaims...."Whew, it's been a long time since I've been a cheerleader!" with a big grin and a little dance.

I was standing next to my sister telling her she was doing great wiping her forehead and thought to myself..."this is why my mom hasn't and will never be allowed at one of my births."

What are some ridiculous statements you have heard about or experienced?
post #2 of 512
i was about to go into the OR for an emergency c-section and the nurses were worried about how to get my nightgown (a cheap k-mart one i bought to get nasty while i birthed) off with the IV in. i was like: "cut the m**herf**king nightgown off! who CARES what happens to it!" but they were so concerned.
"it's such a nice nightgown though...you should save it!".
i couldn't believe they were so worried about the ugly nightgown. i finally got them to cut it off.
post #3 of 512
I've only read about these and seen them said on TV, but I think they're some of the stupidest things to say to a woman in labor:

"push"

"don't push"
post #4 of 512
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by bellymama View Post
i was about to go into the OR for an emergency c-section and the nurses were worried about how to get my nightgown (a cheap k-mart one i bought to get nasty while i birthed) off with the IV in. i was like: "cut the m**herf**king nightgown off! who CARES what happens to it!" but they were so concerned.
"it's such a nice nightgown though...you should save it!".
i couldn't believe they were so worried about the ugly nightgown. i finally got them to cut it off.
Oh my gosh! LAME!

You'd think cutting it off would have just been the first thought...what nurse would even think of screwing up an IV just to get dumb nightgown off, especially when you are going in for surgery? duh!
post #5 of 512
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sapphire_chan View Post
I've only read about these and seen them said on TV, but I think they're some of the stupidest things to say to a woman in labor:

"push"

"don't push"
I agree and this is what was going on with my sis but I think it is the result of epi's.
post #6 of 512
When I was in transition with DS#2 (no meds) I was in lots of pain and DH kept saying "It's ok, it's ok" over and over. I finally yelled at him "Shut up!", because I was NOT ok lol. I felt bad for it cuz he looked hurt, but what he was doing was not at all helpful lol.
post #7 of 512
Stupid nurse at my birth decided to lecture me then and there about how I shouldn't have been doing kegels while pregnant. I just tried my best to ignore her, but really, even if she was right--which she wasn't--what did she hope to accomplish by telling me that, then?
post #8 of 512
Some nurse told my sister it was okay for the Dr to do the episiotomy, because 'you're just way too tight, you're going to tear'.

nothing like fear to help relax the perineum, right :
post #9 of 512
I have never heard this! What were her reasons for not doing kegels during pregnancy? My OB sends a packet of crap home with us at week 12 and one whole page is about how doing kegels before, during, and after pregnancy is the best thing to do!
post #10 of 512
i had a lot of family and friends in the room while i was in labour. i was hooked to a monitor and was having pretty bad contractions. my friend kept looking at the monitor and telling me "OH! here comes another one! OH its a BIG one!!!" i ended up telling my dad to make sure she kept her f-ing mouth shut! lol and i NEVER swear in front of my dad! lol
post #11 of 512
With my last baby, he was posterior, and very high up. He was induced. I started pushing through contractions at 8cm to get him to move down and help the cervix dialate. Anyways I had been pushing for about 1/2hr, and heard the nurse tell the ob that she though I would end up needing help because it was taking to long to get the baby out.
Take in mind from a blind induction, I had only been having contractions for 6hrs, and was pretty much dialated, and was just pushing because it felt better.
Needless to say the supportive ob just about kicked her out of the room.
Yea a lady with a posterior baby, induced with pit, no pain meds, and you tell the ob that you don't think she can push the baby out.
post #12 of 512
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by thatblondegirl View Post
i had a lot of family and friends in the room while i was in labour. i was hooked to a monitor and was having pretty bad contractions. my friend kept looking at the monitor and telling me "OH! here comes another one! OH its a BIG one!!!" i ended up telling my dad to make sure she kept her f-ing mouth shut! lol and i NEVER swear in front of my dad! lol
This one is funny! I can totally picture it in my mind.
post #13 of 512
Quote:
Originally Posted by thatblondegirl View Post
i had a lot of family and friends in the room while i was in labour. i was hooked to a monitor and was having pretty bad contractions. my friend kept looking at the monitor and telling me "OH! here comes another one! OH its a BIG one!!!" i ended up telling my dad to make sure she kept her f-ing mouth shut! lol and i NEVER swear in front of my dad! lol

My bil was in the room for about 20 min durring teh middle of my labor with my first. After each contraction he would make the statement, "wow, that was a big one. I don't know how you are doing it."
post #14 of 512
I was moaning (um...loudly) through some rough transition contractions and my wonderful DH, who was just trying to be supportive said "shhhhh.." In the deepest recesses of my mind, I KNEW he was trying to comfort me, but my mother said that if looks could kill, he would have been a smoldering pile of goo on the floor...lol
post #15 of 512
The MW asst at my last birth was a "treasure." Granted, she was flustered since she arrived shortly before I started pushing, but it was ridiculous. In between ctx she kept asking me where things from the birth kit were, when we had put everything the midwives had asked for very neatly into two large plastic bins, which dh showed her when she came in. One was full of towels and the other had all the birth supply kit items. At one point, she asked for some piece of paperwork (still have no idea why she wanted it then), which I thought might be in the car, and then I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get out of the tub dripping wet, in the middle of transition, in horrendous pain, to get to the car (naked, as well) so I can find her this piece of paper. Dh shot her a look (so he tells me later) and she did then apologize for asking for so many things that were unnecessary at the moment.

I suppose it's possible that I seemed more engaged/available than I really was because I was still telling my dh (in btw ctx) how to finish preparing the vegetarian lasagna I had made for the midwives (it was time to add the last layer of cheese and get it in the oven, of course, so it would be ready after the baby was born).

Then only about an hour or two after the birth, when I had expressed to my midwife (and not to the MW asst, but MW must have told her) that I thought giving birth was still awful and was considering a hospital epidural birth if we had another baby, had the gall to come in and tell me that I had a "beautiful home waterbirth" and how much worse a hospital birth would be. Yeah, that's the time to get on my case about how much I hated the experience. Way to support the 1-hour postpartum mother.
post #16 of 512
At dd#1's birth I was buck naked, sitting on a birth ball, and moaning loudly while a red cross volunteer was trying to get over her own discomfort by asking me questions during contractions. Thinking about her stupid questions only caused me more pain.

"Have you been to the UK in the last 12 months" Me:"I wanna go to Europe"
"Have you had a tattoo in the last 12 months" Me: "Do you see any?"
"Blah, blah blah, more stupid questions that I wasn't paying attention to." Me: "Go away, I need to push"
post #17 of 512
I was squatting toad-style at the end of the bed, and the nurse told me "You have to lay back now, because the baby won't come out that way".

Both DH, my MIL and I looked at each other, then at her like she had 5 heads. Um, what?
post #18 of 512
I was laboring with a doula client at home, and we decided it was time to go to the hospital. By the time we got there, it was obvious the baby was on his way very, very soon. The triage nurse asked if her water broke yet, and I said "no, it hasn't, but the baby is about ready to be born". She replied "oh, honey, if her water hasn't broken, she's got a long time still. You just go to the waiting room until we have everything settled". My eyes almost popped out of my head, but I took a seat. 2 or 3 minutes later, she came running out "hurry up, hurry up, you're going to miss the birth" I really had to resist saying "told ya so" lol
post #19 of 512
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belle View Post
At dd#1's birth I was buck naked, sitting on a birth ball, and moaning loudly while a red cross volunteer was trying to get over her own discomfort by asking me questions during contractions. Thinking about her stupid questions only caused me more pain.

"Have you been to the UK in the last 12 months" Me:"I wanna go to Europe"
"Have you had a tattoo in the last 12 months" Me: "Do you see any?"
"Blah, blah blah, more stupid questions that I wasn't paying attention to." Me: "Go away, I need to push"
Wha? Were you donating blood or something?
post #20 of 512
Quote:
Originally Posted by rem88 View Post
I have never heard this! What were her reasons for not doing kegels during pregnancy? My OB sends a packet of crap home with us at week 12 and one whole page is about how doing kegels before, during, and after pregnancy is the best thing to do!
It is, the nurse was ignorant. Do your kegels!
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