Stupid Things People Say at Births.... - Page 23

[furfeet]

At my last birth (vbac transfer) the hospitalist came in to grill me about not circ'ing, shots, or the eye meds. After I firmly told him no, no, no, he said "The vagina is a very dirty place, and he could have picked up all sorts of things in there" I just looked at him and laughed, but I really wanted to puke. I will never forget those words.
I later heard from a sympathetic nurse that he was overheard asking if I was some "weird religion or something"
I kid you not. :Puke

[majikfaerie]

Originally Posted by furfeet

At my last birth (vbac transfer) the hospitalist came in to grill me about not circ'ing, shots, or the eye meds. After I firmly told him no, no, no, he said "The vagina is a very dirty place, and he could have picked up all sorts of things in there" I just looked at him and laughed, but I really wanted to puke. I will never forget those words.
I later heard from a sympathetic nurse that he was overheard asking if I was some "weird religion or something"
I kid you not. :Puke

gargh! what is it with men and thinking vaginas are dirty??

[airjordi]

When I was getting my IV in for my son's birth, I overheard the nurse tell my doula, "oh, she won't be up and walking around, her water is broken."

um, whut?

[minkajane]

Originally Posted by airjordi

When I was getting my IV in for my son's birth, I overheard the nurse tell my doula, "oh, she won't be up and walking around, her water is broken."

um, whut?

A LOT of hospitals have strict guidelines about never ever ever walking around after the water is broken - supposedly because of the risk of cord prolapse. It's a load of crap, especially because if the water breaks on its own, the baby's head is usually right there at the cervix, blocking the way. Plus the biggest time for cord prolapse is right when the water breaks.

[jewelsJZ]

After having a c-section with my first child, I was wheeled to the recovery room where dh was holding ds. A nurse came in and said we needed to give him formula. I told her I was going to breastfeed. She said, "He's a big baby and needs formula as well. You need to give him a bottle now." I hadn't even had a chance to nurse him first. I told her no. She said, "Well, fine, but I am writing that down in your chart!" This made me and dh laugh.
Then she went to the woman on the other side of the curtain and told her that HER baby was too SMALL and needed formula right away. Dh is sure that she works on a contract from Enfamil or something.
She came back again a few minutes later and said, "You really need to feed him." She still wanted me to give him formula. When I said no and asked her why it was she thought I couldn't breastfeed him, she said it was because I had just come out of surgery and I might drop the baby! (dh was still holding him at the time and he was perfectly peaceful). I said, "So if someone helps me, like my husband, and makes sure I don't drop him, I could try breastfeeding him now." She said, "ok".
In hindsight, I should have told her to f*** off, but at any rate I am so glad I knew enough about breastfeeding to stand my ground. If only I would've known enough not to consent to a c-section, I'd have a different story altogether.

[PatienceAndLove]

And what, exactly, is the perfect size for a baby?

Originally Posted by jewelsJZ

After having a c-section with my first child, I was wheeled to the recovery room where dh was holding ds. A nurse came in and said we needed to give him formula. I told her I was going to breastfeed. She said, "He's a big baby and needs formula as well. You need to give him a bottle now." I hadn't even had a chance to nurse him first. I told her no. She said, "Well, fine, but I am writing that down in your chart!" This made me and dh laugh.
Then she went to the woman on the other side of the curtain and told her that HER baby was too SMALL and needed formula right away. Dh is sure that she works on a contract from Enfamil or something.
She came back again a few minutes later and said, "You really need to feed him." She still wanted me to give him formula. When I said no and asked her why it was she thought I couldn't breastfeed him, she said it was because I had just come out of surgery and I might drop the baby! (dh was still holding him at the time and he was perfectly peaceful). I said, "So if someone helps me, like my husband, and makes sure I don't drop him, I could try breastfeeding him now." She said, "ok".
In hindsight, I should have told her to f*** off, but at any rate I am so glad I knew enough about breastfeeding to stand my ground. If only I would've known enough not to consent to a c-section, I'd have a different story altogether.

[white_queen_22]

Originally Posted by furfeet

At my last birth (vbac transfer) the hospitalist came in to grill me about not circ'ing, shots, or the eye meds. After I firmly told him no, no, no, he said "The vagina is a very dirty place, and he could have picked up all sorts of things in there" I just looked at him and laughed, but I really wanted to puke. I will never forget those words.

Did you ask him if he scrubs and sanitizes his penis after having sex?

That's a truly ridiculous comment.

Angela <><

[kalirush]

Originally Posted by white_queen_22

Did you ask him if he scrubs and sanitizes his penis after having sex?

That's a truly ridiculous comment.

Maybe he's gay...

It would explain the irrational distaste for female genitalia.

(not that that's true of all gay dudes; but it is true that some of them are in the "eeew! eeeeeeeeeew!" camp about girl parts. )

[frontierpsych]

Originally Posted by kalirush

Maybe he's gay...

It would explain the irrational distaste for female genitalia.

(not that that's true of all gay dudes; but it is true that some of them are in the "eeew! eeeeeeeeeew!" camp about girl parts. )

OMG, I had a friend like that! All you had to do is say "vagina" and he started freaking out going "EEEW! EEW! Ohmygod, EEEW!"

[majikfaerie]

:

[applejuice]

Originally Posted by kalirush

Maybe he's gay...

It would explain the irrational distaste for female genitalia.

(not that that's true of all gay dudes; but it is true that some of them are in the "eeew! eeeeeeeeeew!" camp about girl parts. )

NO, he does not have to be gay to say that...Dr. Dean Edell had said things like that all of the time on his radio show for the past thirty years and gets away with it. I do not believe he is gay; he is just "ignorant" about the female genitalia and its natural bacteria count, although he has been married twice and has lots of kids.

He is an ophthamalogist, BTW. So Dr. Dean has no professional training in the female genitalia (just the usual "amateur" training). So he should not be making such rude remarks as a professional on the airwaves as he does...is the FCC listening? or AMA?

It is an old doctors' tale as opposed to an old wives' tale.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by majikfaerie

gargh! what is it with men and thinking vaginas are dirty??

Apparently, he thought penises, or rather foreskins, were dirty too.

I'm a bit : at the thought that something that just had like a gallon of amniotic fluid pour through it could be too dirty for a baby who spent nine months floating in that same fluid.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by PatienceAndLove

And what, exactly, is the perfect size for a baby?

For that nurse, apparently whatever size your baby isn't.

[Celticqueen]

Stupid thing a nurse said at my first hospital delivery:

"I am really surprised YOU would want an unmedicated birth."

Whatever that's supposed to imply...

-Caitrin

[Sioko]

When I was deep in labor land with DD1 and obviously uncomfortable (well duh) I found it particularly dumb that after being asked if I wanted an epi. and me saying "No thankyou. No epi." the nurse would always then look at my support (DH and mom) and ask THEM, "Really? Is she sure?" Like I wasn't capable of knowing my own mind. What'd she expect them to say, "No, she's telling a joke. Give her the drugs." or "Actually she's insane and answering the voices in her head, give her the drugs."

[Celticqueen]

Originally Posted by Sioko

"Actually she's insane and answering the voices in her head, give her the drugs."

-Caitrin

[onetwoten]

I just got back from a birth where the baby's father couldn't be there, and mom was supporting instead. It was very quick, and quite intense, and this was the first birth the mom had seen since birthing her own children 30+ years ago. We are really really deep into transition, after a whirlwind labor, and mom is having a lot of trouble coping. She's starting to ask us "Help me! Help me!" "Save me!!" And well... all those typical transition comments that tell us she's almost done.

Her mother takes one look at her, bursts into tears, starts wailing, grabs the nurse and starts screaming "She's dying!! Look at her, she's dying!! She's going to have a heart attack! Oh my god, my baby! She's dying!"

I don't think I'll ever get the look of the laboring moms face out of my memory. She needed firm unconditional support, and instead she had a mother screaming that she was about to die.

[furfeet]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Apparently, he thought penises, or rather foreskins, were dirty too.

I'm a bit : at the thought that something that just had like a gallon of amniotic fluid pour through it could be too dirty for a baby who spent nine months floating in that same fluid.

not to mention that there are bacteria in the vagina that babies are MEANT to pick up on the way out, for their own immune systems.

My husband came in to visit about 1/2 hr. later and I just started sobbing, all I could manage to say was "the doctor said I have a dirty vagina!" It took him a moment to realize I wasn't joking, then he got the look that if the doctor showed his face in the room again there'd be a fist in it right quick.

[furfeet]

oh and another male OB-vs-vagina story...
my mom's co-worker had just delivered and while sewing up her episiotomy the ob said "there, I made you pretty." She heard a few snipping sounds right before he said that. She doesn't know what he did, but she was actually grateful that he had "improved" the appearance of her vagina in some way after her baby's birth. :

[majikfaerie]

Originally Posted by furfeet

oh and another male OB-vs-vagina story...
my mom's co-worker had just delivered and while sewing up her episiotomy the ob said "there, I made you pretty." She heard a few snipping sounds right before he said that. She doesn't know what he did, but she was actually grateful that he had "improved" the appearance of her vagina in some way after her baby's birth. :

WTF!!!???