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What name do you use for your daughters private parts? - Page 5

post #81 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by jeca View Post
To those so hung up about the dreaded V word( wow feeling old school MDC there for a minute) do you also refer to every other part of your body in the correct term? So you say your esophagus is hurting, or you bruised your scapula, right? You call it a coccyx versus your tail bone? Just curious. Yes, I know the correct terms, i've been to nursing school(didn't finish I admit) and I still don't feel the need but if you refer to everything in the correct term then I guess it makes sense for you to.
I do use the term coccyx, because I broke mine once and boy do I know exactly where that is. Sometimes I use esophagus, sometimes throat. Not scapula, though.

Even if I didn't use those terms, though, I strongly agree with this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by mumster View Post
Jeca: this would make sense except that the esophagus, scapula and coccyx have never had the shame and fear associated with them that female's genitalia have. I mean there aren't that many pet words for shoulder or throat or tailbone, but for some reason people over the ages have refused to name or have come up with a multitude of pet names for vagina and vulva like there IS something to hide or feel shame about.
Using the correct terms feels empowering to me, and I feel teaching my son the correct terms teaches him respect for women.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mumster View Post
Kessed: in an attempt to explain your offense at the misunderstood "Yoni" (which was very informative) you offend others who choose to use words like vulva, vagina etc. These aren't crude words but empowering, shame-free, knowledge-full words.
I agree. I find them lovely and empowering words. I fail to see what is "crude" about them at all. Considering the correct terms in our native language "crude" seems just like finding the correct terms "shameful" to me.
post #82 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by mumster View Post
I'm curious to know what holds you back from using vulva or vagina at this point with your dd.
Because of the way my girls are. I think the complexity of all the different names and their meanings and functions( I will have to explain EVERYTHING I will have to that's how they are). Basically it will involve lots of details, questions and visuals so I would just like to put it off a few years. I'm not talking teen years just to a better comprehensive stage.
post #83 of 184
Quote:
Because of the way my girls are. I think the complexity of all the different names and their meanings and functions( I will have to explain EVERYTHING I will have to that's how they are). Basically it will involve lots of details, questions and visuals so I would just like to put it off a few years. I'm not talking teen years just to a better comprehensive stage.
Thanks Jeca- I appreciate the explanation.
post #84 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by mumster View Post
Thanks Jeca- I appreciate the explanation.
I do use the word vagina, that's the word they know just not anything else. I never thought twice about using it as a "catch all" though until this thread but I'm still sticking to it.
post #85 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by jaye View Post
Well I don't use it but it's not a pretend word

The word yoni (Sanskrit योिन yoni) is the Sanskrit word for "divine passage", "place of birth", "womb" (more as nature as a womb and cradle of all creations) or "sacred temple"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoni
Ah, see, I had no idea it was a real word. I don't speak Sanskrit and wasn't aware that so many people did, hence their use of 'yoni'.

I still don't like it though because it's a euphemism when you're speaking in English.

ETA: and also, I don't feel comfortable appropriating other languages as and when I see fit, just because I like the word, when there is a perfectly acceptable word in my own language, particularly for body parts.
post #86 of 184
Vagina. VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA!!
what is wrong with the normal part?? What is soo wrong with saying vagina? I think it's wrong to call your child's private parts a nickname.
Do you have a nickname for you elbow? your knees? no. so why should vangina be any different?
post #87 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ann-Marita View Post
We use vulva, or genitals.

To me, saying vagina (the birth canal) when you really mean vulva (the visible, external female genitalia) is like saying "mouth" when you really mean "face".
Exactly.

Yoni is technically incorrect (as is vagina) since it refers to the internal part of a woman's genitals (womb, birth passage). Plus we don't use any other Sanskrit words in our house. And I think it's an unattractive word . It doesn't appeal to my ears (this is the same for lots of words in other languages).

So it's vulva, genitals or 'privates' if they're in public and don't want to use more explicit terms. The boys use penis, testes and foreskin very happily.

The point about lower incidences of sexual abuse in children who use the correct terms is a very good one - I knew about the link years before having children and it was a factor in our decision to use the anatomical terms.
post #88 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhDang View Post
Vagina. VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA!!
what is wrong with the normal part?? What is soo wrong with saying vagina? I think it's wrong to call your child's private parts a nickname.
Do you have a nickname for you elbow? your knees? no. so why should vangina be any different?
Saying is vagina is wrong if what you're referring to are the parts that you and your child can see. The vagina is an internal part of the body.
post #89 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by philomom View Post
We always used vulva because it is the outside part that you might see changing clothes.

Your vagina is hidden from view always..... only your lover or midwife would ever see it.
Yes, when people refer to a woman's vagina in reference to the vulva, it makes me think they don't know the anatomy very well. It's like saying penis and meaning scrotum, testes, vas deferens, etc. It's like saying hand when you mean the whole [I]arm[/I.
post #90 of 184
I guess I'm confused as to why someone would CONTINUE to use the wrong word when they've found out the word does not mean what the think it means. Why not just correct your mistake to your children?
post #91 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by zinemama View Post
Exactly. Sure, yoni has a lovely meaning but I don't use words from other languages and cultures to describe my body parts. I'm not a Sanscrit speaker, not to mention I know nothing of Sanscrit or the religion associated with it. It feels disrespectful to appropriate another culture's term like that.
English has MANY words in it borrowed directly from other languages. Most houses have a "foyer" which is a French word. French being the most common language to borrow words from. "Coup D'Etat" Even the roots for the name of my country were borrowed from another language. But there are many other places we have taken words from "Algebra" is from Arabic. Here's a neat site which has many English words organized by their origins: http://www.krysstal.com/borrow.html

Maybe there is a different attitude in the US than there is in Canada - but here there is no 'disrespect' for taking and properly using a word from a different language or culture. But, then again, we still pronounce "Foyer" and "Foy-eh!" not "Foy-errrrr"... (Huge pet peeve from American TV)

Quote:
Originally Posted by OhDang View Post
Vagina. VAGINA VAGINA VAGINA!!
what is wrong with the normal part?? What is soo wrong with saying vagina? I think it's wrong to call your child's private parts a nickname.
Do you have a nickname for you elbow? your knees? no. so why should vangina be any different?
Well... Vagina is wrong in that case.
post #92 of 184
ok, I haven't read every response, but I did read a few.

My kids know the correct names for all of their parts. DD especially as the sex talk came about during the time I was taking Anatomy in college. LOL Most of the time when we are having a conversation between the child and myself ABOUT whatever part, we use the correct names. When we are having a conversation about something else and reference said parts OR if we are in the company of others, we use girl/boy parts as the phrase. I hope that makes sense.

We are very open as a family, we can talk about any body part or any bodily function openly without discomfort, but I do know that some people do get a bit squirmy when you use certain words. This is why we say 'girl parts' when we are around others. We know what we are talking about, but it doesn't make other people feel uncomfortable. LOL, not that we frequently have 'girl/boy part' conversations in front of company.

"Can you pass the potatoes? BTW, how are your girl parts today?"
post #93 of 184
We say vagina b/c it was what we talked about with DS when I was pregnant with DD (and it was the correct terminology) and it has stuck. I use yoni now with DD - I like that it conveys a multitude of levels of meaning about that area.

I dislike cutsie names and for DS, we use the proper names, penis, foreskin, scrotum, etc.

I guess maybe when DD is older we'll talk about the medical terminology, but for now, I actually like yoni a lot.
post #94 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThreeBeans View Post
I guess I'm confused as to why someone would CONTINUE to use the wrong word when they've found out the word does not mean what the think it means. Why not just correct your mistake to your children?
Yes. This thread made me realize that I've been telling my son vagina, and that is simply not correct. It's funny, I know my anatomy, I just didn't think to say labia or vulva.

But I certainly will now.
post #95 of 184
I taught my kids vulva - but I gotta say - it's definitely not the norm out there even among people who don't use pet names. My boy went through a stage at his co-op preschool where he would ask people (adults) if they had a vulva or a penis. Even at this hippie California school, the adults were a little taken aback by the word vulva coming from a 3 yr old. They almost all used vagina.

I still tell them vulva but I tell them lots of people call it a vagina. Confusing for little kids but I want them to know. They are also aware of lots of pet names - we have some old family names that were derived from Portuguese that we use occasionally at home.
post #96 of 184
Vulva and bum/butt/bottom
post #97 of 184
I don't use yoni myself, but I'm amused that so many object to it because they don't speak Sanskrit. Vagina and vulva aren't exactly "English" words, either - they're Latin. But there seems to be no problem using those, even if one doesn't speak Latin. It's kind of funny.
post #98 of 184
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThreeBeans View Post
I guess I'm confused as to why someone would CONTINUE to use the wrong word when they've found out the word does not mean what the think it means. Why not just correct your mistake to your children?
Yes, I feel this way too!

And yes, when folks don't use the right word, I doubt their intelligence.
post #99 of 184
Vulva. Tushie or bottom. Anus. Penis. Testicles. Those are the words we use.

However, last week one of my younger dd's was wrestling with an older brother, and when her knee hit him he yelled, "ugh! You kneed me in my..... um." And he laughed when I filled it in with "vulnerable spot?". So now he keeps calling it his "vulnerable spot".
post #100 of 184
For the vagina, as in the hole, canal, etc... we say vagina. DD is very amused by her vagina, so it's something that comes up often.

For the vulva area, urethral opening, clitoris, etc...I call it a "pee-pee." I know it's stupid, but since it's where pee pee comes out, it just somehow makes sense to her. I started calling it that when I thought that DD might have had a UTI-- I asked her if her "pee-pee" hurt, it was the only thing that made sense at the time and I still use it.
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