i'd have to say that my situation is rather an innate one. i've basically "always" known.
but i'll unpack a bit.
When did you realize that you can't just "trust" your HCPs?
my mother tells a story of when i was six. my mother's story goes as follows: due to my eye health, my parents met with a specialist who decided that i needed another surgery. i'd had a couple as an infant/toddler, and now i was 6 so apparently i needed another. encouraged by my parents, i was allowed to ask this surgeon questions.
i asked him how he planned to fix my eyes, what he planned to do. i wanted to be walked through the surgery, with the chart of the eye, and the whole bit like my previous doctor would do. instead, he responded with "i'll fix it just like magic!"
apparently, he thought i was 6 or something.
anyway, i then said to him--according to my mother--"only clowns do magic; i would prefer that a clown not preform surgery on my eyes."
from that moment on, every time the surgery was brought up by my parents, i would protest that surgery under those terms. i felt no reason to get the surgery, and i didn't trust the surgeon.
after the surgery was done, my parents discovered that he did nothing that was necessary nor did what he do do anything for my condition or health. they paid out of pocket for an experimental surgery that they couldn't afford with basically a quack who wanted the money to buy a boat.
and when my parents were lamenting this, i informed them that clowns shouldn't be trusted with surgery.
so, i've known for quite a while that some HCP cannot be trusted.
What made you be an active participant in your health care?
i became really active in my health care as an adult, in college. i had a health condition that caused me to lactate.
my endocrinologist insisted that it was a pituitary tumor, even though there was no evidence--other than lactation--of this, and even though he thought it was 'really' from my using too much marijuanna (a side effect of excessive use of the herb, but i've never smoked it, ever!).
so, he prescribed a fertility medication for me that would help balance out ht ehormones--something he told me i'd have to be on for the rest of my life. he also put my on birth control pills.
i read the papers for both, and learned that the combination could render me infertile. i asked my endocrinologist about it,and he told me that it likely wouldn't be a problem, and if it was, there were always fertility treatments in the future.
at this point, completely unconvinced that it was a pituitary tumor and also completely not trusting htis doctor because he still insisted that i should "get help with my marijuanna problem and it would go away"--i decided to just chuck it.
i started doing my own research, and with diet and exercise, and ultimately fertility charting as well, i was able to completely heal the situation on my own. the basic (stopping hte lactating) took six months, and then getting my fertility cycle in tip-top shape after that took a few years.
pregnant today, healthy as can be!
so, i'm definitely in charge of this. i was 19 when i was lactating that first time.
If you were ever non-active in your health care, why was that?
largely because i was a child. i was prbably always 'active' in it to a certain extent--protesting certain things that people wanted to push on me in various ways.
but, i also had to do what my parents said, and they're far more trusting of doctors and medicine than i am.
in fact, they were very upset that i decided to get rid of the prolactin problem on my own, and even now still encourage me to see another endocrinologist on a regular basis "just in case."
of course, i don't really see any HCP on a regular basis anway, simply because i take care of my own health. i just have more success that way.
and certainly more success than my family, who goes to the doctor frequently if not for check ups, then for appointments for various upsets and illnesses.
Why do you think some women don't care?
I think that women do care, but that they have a different philosophical approach to these things. i'll tell another story.
one of my friends is a very amazing woman. she does everything under the sun that you can imagine--she runs our local farmers market, she runs a local community theater, she writes grants for both, she cares for her children, she helps out at their schools and with their non-profit organization activities. she can do just about anything that you can imagine.
but she won't make coffee.
it's not a feminist thing, it's nto because she's intellectually incapable. simply, she has decided that she doesn't want to set her mind to making coffee.
another friend of mine is a cardiac, pediatric anethesiologist. hard core, right? she's awesome. she can't memorize a sequence of pilates postures. there's a traditional sequence. she teaches it twice a week. she does it herself three times a week. she's been doing it for years. she simply hasn't memorized the sequence.
many of us have many things going on in our lives. many of us have responsibility for a variety of things in our lives. there are times and places in our lives where we might just let someone else handle it. sure, coffee and the pilates sequence aren't as intensive or as important as the health care situation, but it's meant to be illustrative.
and the illustration is this--people decide what to spend their energy on, and for some people, trusting the doctor is enough. they don't need to go farther, at the mental/emotional level, and they utilize whatever energy they save by doing so on other projects.
so, i do think that many people are very empowered in various ways, but may not be puttng that energy into their health care situations--because they are happy with those situations, or they're happy to trust that situation 'as is.'
and i can accept that.
Is there any way to get women to care?
i think that acknowledging that they do care is the first step. and if they don't care, i have no clue how to get them to care.
but when i notice that most women do care, but don't have the time or energy to put into their health care that i do, or simply have a very different ideology of what appropriate health care is, then i find i'm more accepting and less frustrated in general.
I ask questions to learn, after all.
I don't care about their decisions. I care about the fact that unless a woman takes an active roll in the decision making process she's all too likely to recieve health care that isn't evidence based. I care that decisions women AREN'T actually making decisions--they are being made for her by OBs with their agendas.
