What's with hiring a M/W and a Doula?

[janasmama]

I'm seeing that some women are hiring both a m/w and a doula...I just don't understand.

I have had two different m/w's and they both fulfilled the role that a doula would as far as emotional support during labor, etc.

I just couldn't imagine having a m/w who was strictly VE's, vitals, and baby catcher. I just don't think I could groove with her.

[christyc]

That's so funny you say that, because I had a midwife and a doula at my birth and can't imagine ever doing it any other way! There were ALWAYS times during my labor when my midwife was doing something technical that I could still use support, massage, hand-holding, etc. I guess we're all different in that regard.

[Funny Face]

If you have a very busy midwife they don't always hang out during labor if you need help early on, in which case a doula would be helpful. You also might be in a situation where you have to choose a midwife that you aren't as emotionally connected with and a doula would be a great emotional support.

I always figure the more help, the better! And if you have a more complicated or long labor it can help to have two people to do separate jobs.

[apelilae]

I understand where you are coming from. I was going to have a MW and a doula until I found out my MW's assistants are also doulas, so since I have to pay the assistant fee anyway, why get a doula too?

[Gray's Mommy]

I hired both & it was great. My m/w & doula took turns with my DH for supporting me. I had a 25 hour labor, so it was good.

[sunanthem]

I was of the same mindset, since I had 2 homebirths, 1 w/ a midwife, and 2 assistants, 1 w/ midwife, and assistant, and midwife's granddaughter, plus my people.

I was of the mindset that less is better, and doulas really arent needed if you have a great midwifery team. But I just took a doula training this weekend so now I see how a doula can help w/ tons of positions, education and emotional support, so now I see how it could be useful having another person there, as long as the two women, doula and midwife can work together.
I see how some women would like it w/ doula, and some would like it w/o.

[xixstar]

We're having a doula and a m/w - mostly because my expectations of my mw are to stay completely invisible during labor. She's there as dh's comfort measure, otherwise I'd be having an UC. But, I wanted a doula to provide an extra support person to help meet my needs and dh's needs. I'm rather particular and fussy when uncomfortable and I know that dh is the best support person for me - but I wanted him to have support as well because I can be rather demanding or difficult and an extra set of hands felt like a good idea.

I'll admit that I occasionally feel that a doula isn't necessary, but figured we'd try it this time, see how it goes, and then decide if we'll need her for other births or not. Also, we both really like our doula and she's the only person I can imagine filling that role -- if she weren't available, I'd just do without.

[MsBlack]

Not only do mws need the time and space to do 'technical things' (which most often, take only small amts of her energy anyway)--they may well need time to sleep! In a labor under 10hrs, at least if it doesn't start (for the mw) early in her usual sleeping time or after she's just done another birth, you may not much need a doula. But if labor does start when the mw is already tired, or if your labor goes on long enough, it definitely makes sense to have someone on hand for labor support/fetch-duties and let the mw sleep so she is reasonably fresh and alert for the final moments and through placenta delivery.

On the other hand, hiring a doula may not be needed if you have a friend or 2 who could provide support on an 'as needed' basis...knowing you will only call on them if necessary. Whether or not such a friend has doula training doesn't matter if she is calm and steady, and willing to jump in (possibly with clear direction--the right person is not hard to 'train on the job').

[aprilsfools]

I think it really depends on your MW and if she works as a team or alone. I think that some MW who work alone are sometimes too busy monitoring you, the baby, setting up, etc. to properly coach you and DH through labor. Also, it depends on your DH and how much coaching he will need himself. My DH needs that help and security of knowing someone has his back.

My MW will come to the birth with another experienced MW and a apprentice. Both my MW and the other one were both doulas before they became apprentice MWs (and than full blown MWs), with additional training in hypnobirthing (my MW) and massage (the other MW). Also, since they have the apprentice there (they call her the slave girl LOL) to do all of the extras, take notes as they talk out loud, etc. at least one of them will have their minds free to help DH help me through labor.

With all of this experience and knowledge, in addition to giving birth at home where I am safe and my choices are normal, I felt that I didn't need to pay the additional $900 for a doula...but it was something I considered in the beginning because I love the doula we had picked out when we were planning a hospital birth.

[kitkatkaddoodle]

I'm doing it because:

1. First timers tend to take longer, so my MW might need breaks. This particular MW doesn't have official assistants, but she will pay half the fee of the doula if we want one since she'll then be the MW's assistant.
2. Sometimes you just need more than one person to do something, like keeping pressure on your back, wiping your head, and warming the compress again.
3. My husband kept bringing up the idea of a doula till I got the idea that it would make HIM more comfortable to have another person to tell him what to do. He's a great guy, but me being in pain is scary to him. While he's willing to do anything to help, he's afraid he'll blank out or freak out when the MW isn't around or busy, so the doula will help direct him. I joke that the doula is more for *him* than me!

[MamaSong]

For me, my doula came over about 5 hours before we even called the MW. I liked having her support in the early hours of my first labor since I had no idea how things were going to progress. My MW always suggested hiring a doula. She was a doula for 20 years before she became a MW and I know she felt like they were just two totally different jobs. 2 totally different ways of being present to the mother during the birth. It didn't affect how I connected with her at all. She was great and I trusted her completely. And I loved having my doula too. It took a lot of pressure off of dh having a doula there. He was really able to go with the flow without feeling any pressure to perform.

[1972momma]

Hm.

You're making some assumptions here, namely that a woman who hires a doula for a home birth doesn't connect, or "groove," with her midwife, on an emotional level.

Personally, I completely connect with both my midwife and my doula -- both are very emotionally present, attuned and so on.

And yet, when push comes to shove, no pun intended, they do perform different jobs, so I feel very blessed to be able to have both.

I've always figured the worst thing that could happen with hiring both is that there ends up being some redundancy in terms of emotional support, but, that sounds OK to me!

All of that being said, some women probably do hire a doula in addition to a midwife because their midwife isn't the most touchy-feely sort. But, to me, that doesn't mean the midwife is somehow lacking. To me, the most important quality in any care provider is competence. So, while I happen to love my midwife's personality, I consider that the icing on the cake, rather the reason I hired her.

As a pp said, we're all different!

[Paiges_Mommy]

Originally Posted by apelilae

I understand where you are coming from. I was going to have a MW and a doula until I found out my MW's assistants are also doulas, so since I have to pay the assistant fee anyway, why get a doula too?

Even if she was free?? LOL just joshin ya!

[1sttimemomma]

I had both the first time around and I am going to do it again. Thing is that the Doula comes a lot earlier than the midwife. I feel like I need support during that earlier time.

Plus...I need someone not medical to be there to help me.

[meredyth0315]

My reasons for having both is b/c I'm doing a HBA2C and I feel that I will need their experience. Both have something wonderful to offer with different roles. I just feel that being surrounded by people with vbac experience will be beneficial to me, and DH won't feel intimidated or like he won't know what to do - I will have 2 wonderful women with me that will know and I find that comforting & encouraging

[hanno]

Because 14 months later I'm still waiting for a massage and someone to help out. Taking the dog out during labour was not superfun. Glad you have amazing midwives, but not all are able to do that.

[Lit Chick]

I hired a doula - and the short reason wasuring the birth, the MWs are focused on you from the waist down the doula is focused on you from the waist up.
I was a 1st timer and wanted the just-in-case. JIC I had a loooong labor, or needed someone to manage my family, or if there was a medical issue that took all my MW's focus I wanted a pro to be there for comforting me/DH/etc.

I ended up not really needing her at all, because my labor went super fast so she was a bit late to the show. Also, my MW and all of her students were available and they all came... so I had about as much backup as possible.
I also got my doula for not too much $$. If she had been $900, would not have happened.

[jraohc]

You've already gotten lots of answers, but here's one more. I hired a midwife (group) and doula for my first - a hospital birth. The doula was absolutely necessary. The midwives were much more medical and interventionist than I desired and the doula was necessary.

This time I'm hiring a doula and midwife and planning a homebirth. One reason I've hired the doula is to help care for my 4-year-old daughter. The other reason I've hired the doula is because I think she approaches the birth in a different direction than the midwife. The midwife's job is to take care of medical concerns and I want someone who can be completely focused on me, which is what I feel I'll get from a doula, who doesn't have to spend any time or energy thinking about medical concerns.

[BakerALM]

I actually asked my MW this question..."should I hire a doula?". she kind of looked at me funny and then tried to answer the question as objectably as possible as to not sway my answer or make me feel uncomfortable hiring a doula if I really wanted one. Basically my underling feeling from her is that she likes doing what a doula would be hired to do. she feels it is a great part of her job BUT if I wanted to have a doula that would be fine as well. I think it just depends on your personal preference and relationship with your MW.