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little girl going to bathroom w/daddy

post #1 of 73
Thread Starter 
Okay. On another (mainstream) site, there was some discussion about a father taking a little girl to a public bathroom. Everyone agreed that they should go to the stall and maybe cover the girl's eyes until they got in, and if the dad has to go, she stands outside the stall but facing the door . . . one dad would put a handkerchief over her head. Apparently there is an issue here that never crossed my mind. Dh takes our 3.5 yo to public bathrooms regularly and has never expressed any concern to me. He even took her to swimming lessons last winter and they changed in the men's locker room. I'm a little confused as to who they are trying to protect here. Or what the harm would be in a little girl seeing a man urinate. Am I crazy? Call it as you see it.

(This on the day dd and I were looking at an anatomy book and she said something about a penis so I said, "Want to see a picture of a penis? Looks like it's on page 514 . . ."):
post #2 of 73
wow, I didn't think it was such a big deal either. i think covering their eyes or making them turn the other direction makes a bigger deal out of it. that's why i love family washrooms...but come to think of it, i've never seen a "dad" in a family washroom....i actually don't really get gender washrooms anyway.
post #3 of 73
I think those other people are off their rockers. Dh takes dd to the bathroom all the time (she's nearly 4 for the record...)

But I have no issues with nudity. We all see it all around here. I'd be fine with unisex bathrooms personally.

-Angela
post #4 of 73
OMG!!!!! Dad has a penis and uses it to pee how harming.
post #5 of 73
Maybe they think they guys urinating would be uncomfortable with a small girl in the restroom. I know that I don't like it when I'm in a public restroom doing my thing and some strange little boy sticks his head under the wall to my stall. It's happened a couple times. It's not that I think they'll see something, I just think it's rude and an invasion of privacy.

ETA: I wouldn't like it if a little girl stuck their head in my stall either, it's just that it hasn't happened.
post #6 of 73
I think as long as the parent is with the child, it doesn't matter. If someone else has a problem with it, then the problem is with them.
post #7 of 73
I don't think it's a big deal at all. As a PP said, I think that the bigger issue is a man feeling uncomfortable with a small girl seeing him. In any case, DH has taken our daughters into the men's room many times.
post #8 of 73
DH takes our DDs (almost 5 yr and 2 yr) into public bathrooms, I don't think its a big deal at all. Although DH was a little embarrassed after swimming lessons when DD2 would inform the men in the locker room, while pointing, that they each had a penis!
post #9 of 73
I don't see anymore of a problem with it as a mom taking their son into the bathroom (which I do regularly).
post #10 of 73
This weekend at the campgrounds there was a man in the ladies bathroom with his little girl. Not just bathroom stalls, but a shower area too, with a common locker room!
post #11 of 73
That's bizarre. My husband takes our daughter to the men's room. I don't think it's ever been an issue for anyone.
post #12 of 73
DH takes dd, 2 into the men's room all the time.

However, I think the issue arrises that men using urinals may be a little shocked and uncomfortable to see an older girl-child come into the bathroom while they have it all hanging out, so to speak.
post #13 of 73
We don't think it's a big deal at all. Sometimes my daughter (5.5) wants to use the bathroom with daddy, sometimes she wants me to go with her (ok, if daddy's around, chances are she wants to go with him ). In some places, she can go by herself and sometimes she uses the men's and sometimes the women's. It's just not a big deal to us. She sees her dad pee at home, she knows what penises look like, and she's not going to be freaked out if she sees a man peeing in a public restroom.

These things are only a big deal if you make them one!

Personally, I'm all for unisex restrooms . . . I don't get why, as a girl, I shouldn't pee in the same facility that a guy uses.
post #14 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post

Personally, I'm all for unisex restrooms . . . I don't get why, as a girl, I shouldn't pee in the same facility that a guy uses.
Count your blessings. Men smell.
post #15 of 73
This is why I am so glad that most new built public spaces have a family or unisex bathroom Not that I or DH mind DD going with him, which she does regularly, but because on a societal level it is such a big deal! And, eventually when DS and DD don't feel comfortable going with us to the opposite sex bathroom, they can go with us, or by themselves into a family bathroom that is usually just one toilet with a locking door (or two toilets-- one little and one big!)

My DD has spent the last 2 years or so going swimming with grandpa once a week. They change in the family locker rooms, which are 5 big rooms with individually locking doors and changing tables. Lockers and showers in a common area that opens onto the pool deck, so you shower in your suit, grab your bag and dress in the locked room. Anyway, this was only a problem for a short period of time when we learned that I was expecting DS, a boy, who would have a penis. DD delighted in telling everyone what sort of genitalia they had, so she would point and shout to fully clothed people "You have a penis! My baby brother will have a penis too!" So, in the changing room with grandpa for two or three weeks, she would shout, "Grandpa! You have a penis! I have a vagina! My baby brother will have a penis!" etc. My poor FIL would come home so embarrased!
post #16 of 73
Oh, and talk about some awesome family bathrooms! We were in the Natick Mall, (excuse me, NATICK COLLECTION, GAG) a few months ago. IT was a normal shopping mall until they changed it up a few years ago with all high end stores and expensive luxury condos.

Anyhow, the bathrooms were AMAZING....beautiful fixtures, velvet couches, etc.

And they had these HUGE family bathrooms. With one big toilet and one little toilet. It was adorable


They also had nursing/mothers rooms independent of the bathrooms
post #17 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThreeBeans View Post
Count your blessings. Men smell.
Do they have cooties, too?
post #18 of 73
DH takes DD (4 next week!) to the public restroom all the time. Usually, he's the only one who'll take her, for two reasons:
1. She wants Dad to take her
2. The baby is going through some seperation anxiety with me, so I stay with her while DD1 goes potty

We have actually had family members bring it up to us, because it never occurred to us before that we were somehow harming our child by letting her pee. It just isn't an issue for us.

And so far, we've never had a guy feel uncomfortable with DD walking in. Usually, when she decides to finally pee, she's had to go for a while and she flat-out RUNS to the stall. Not to mention, it's fairly kid-friendly around here, and not odd at all to see little boys in the women's room/little girls in the men's room. It just isn't a big deal.

And putting a handkerchief over a girl's head so as not to see her father peeing?! That's a bit disturbing, actually. I'm sorry, the women on that other board are, frankly, nuts. They're creating something sexual and perverted out of a normal biological function.
post #19 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
Do they have cooties, too?
Have you ever been in a men's bathroom when men are doing their business?

It is absolutely horrifying. The gastronomical noises...the grunts, the groans....the...moving air

The splashing, the farting, the popping. The PLONKING.

And the smell is enough to make your eyes bleed.

I'd rather poop among ladies
post #20 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by ilovemyavery View Post
DD delighted in telling everyone what sort of genitalia they had, so she would point and shout to fully clothed people "You have a penis! My baby brother will have a penis too!" So, in the changing room with grandpa for two or three weeks, she would shout, "Grandpa! You have a penis! I have a vagina! My baby brother will have a penis!" etc. My poor FIL would come home so embarrased!
laughup The thought of this happening to my dad makes this even more funny!
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