Am I the only one who wanted a boy? - Page 2

[oceanbaby]

My problem is when people always say, in front of my son, "You must be really hoping for a girl now." I'm afraid he'll think we were disappointed with him (we absolutely weren't).

Yep, it's when they say it in front of ds that it particularly upsets me.

I guess I'll just have to chalk it up to just another one of those insensitive comments that people make. I know they don't mean it to be insensitive or insulting.

We didn't find out the sex the first time, and we don't plan to this time either. We know more now than ever that it just won't matter once this next baby is here.

I have to say that I have never seen my dad so happy as when ds was born. Although he loved my sister and I, he always had wanted a boy. He just can't get enough of ds. They are two little mischevious buddies together.

And re "cotton balls" - that's horrible! I've never heard that before. Although I do admit that dh and I were talking about how we both have the feeling that we are going to have all boys, and we joked about how he must just have very masculine sperm. But it certainly wasn't mean to reflect on those that have girls. That's just silly.

[PumpkinSeeds]

From the time I was little, I always wanted two little boys.

I have one ds now and I'm really hoping this belly bean is a boy too, although I will be happy with girl.

[famousmockngbrd]

I wanted a boy. I want all boys. I like being the only queen in the hive.

[QueeTheBean]

Re: Am I the only one who wanted a boy?

Originally posted by oceanbaby
I feel so sad for boys these days - it seems like everything I read, and everyone I talk to, is all about having a girl. Hoping for a girl, being disappointed if it's a boy, etc. etc. People with boys want a girl next, but I never hear of anyone with a girl who wants a boy next.

I totally agree & don't think you are being sensitive!! I hear this all the time and it makes me sad and angry.

I, too, wanted a girl the first time, but had a boy. Like everyone else here, I fell in love & couldn't imagine anything else. The second time, I wanted a boy really badly & would tell everyone this before they could even get the "bet you want a girl" zing in. Even then, people would still insist.

So glad I have 2 little boys.

Anyway, I have really found the girl-preference to be true & it hurts me somehow. My friend who has 2 girls once said "I think I'd die if I gave birth to one of those" (meaning boys), and my sister, who has 3 girls is always saying she's glad she didn't have boys 'cause she just couldn't handle it. Huh? My boys are sweet, gentle, bright, and fun. The little one is constantly running up to me saying "HUG!", and the older one is so loving and thoughtful, it melts my heart. In Kindergarten, he made a picture that said "C my name is Colin" and then they were supposed to fill in the blank with "I Like To . . .” His teacher told me that before she had even instructed them to do anything, Colin had written all by himself "I like to hug my Mama" and drawn a picture of us hugging. I have it framed now!

Anyway, I think the media, etc. does a job of making boys out to look violent and stupid and girls are sweetness and light. I've not found either to be the reality. Don't get me wrong; I love little girls and love having 3 sweet nieces to play with. Don't even get me started on their cute clothes--I love to buy for them!!! It is just that I've found girls have faults, too--like boys, they are not perfect! It seems like people think girls are so much easier, or that if you, as a mom, have a girl, it automatically means you are going to have a close relationship. I love my mom and will miss never having a daughter, but my mom and my brother have a different kind of bond--he is her only son (she also has 4 daughters), and he is so special to her!

One more thing--(sorry--but this is really a big sore spot for me!), I was watching "A Baby Story" on TLC and this mom had one son--a little guy. She ended up having a daughter & at the baptism, she ACTUALLY SAID "I thought I knew what love was when I had my son, but now that I have my daughter, I know this is real love". I am not quoting exactly, but real close. That'll be nice to show her son someday, huh?

Ok, I feel better.

[QueeTheBean]

Originally posted by famousmockngbrd
I wanted a boy. I want all boys. I like being the only queen in the hive.

Oh--this is another good reason to have only boys! I love it. I even get my own bathroom & the 3 boys share the other one! Hee hee!!

[mamawanabe]

Gosh no, if anything, from my expereince, I've seen that boys are less discrimated against in terms of how much more proud and happy immediate and extended families are about sons being born.

I do think there is a belief that familys are expected to want both genders, but there is much more an expectaion that a family will be disappointed with only girls than with only boys.

Maybe I am just being sensitive too, maybe we can't make any generalizations based on the desires or our familys and friends, maybe it depends on which area of the country you live in, but definately in my experience (which is the south and midwest) boy babies are more valuable than girl babies.

[eilonwy]

Before we got pregnant, dh wanted a girl. I wanted balance: 2 boys and 2 girls. When we found out we were pregnant (before, for me!) I *knew* that I was having a boy. I was absolutely certain, and I was thrilled with it. Dh said he would be very happy either way, but he wasn't convinced it was a boy until the ultrasound.

While I was pregnant people would ask "What are you having?" I'd tell them a boy, and they'd say "Did you want a boy or a girl?" and I'd say "Yes!" I can't imagine having a strong preference one way or the other with a first child (not an only). It's just not me. It's a totally foreign concept to me, because I'm so driven to balance things. (Can you tell I'm a Libra? :LOL)

We're ttc right now, and I'm hoping the next one is a girl so that at least I have one of each. If I'd had a girl first, I'd be hoping the next one was a boy; it's that simple for me, a matter of balance. I'll be very happy with another little boy. I love having a son. I just want to "do" both. And if we do have another boy, I will hope more fervently for a girl the next time. :LOL. The same would be true in reverse!

[PurplePixiePooh]

I never hear of anyone with a girl who wants a boy next.

My firstborn is a girl, I literally prayed for months to have a boy, and I was so excited when it was officially announced a boy!
I haven't read this entire thread, but I am thrilled that I have a son - and daughter.

[TranscendentalMom]

I actually do know one girl who really wanted a boy and recently her ultrasound revealed that she is probably having a girl and she was devastated. Go figure the one person I know that desperately wants a boy isn't getting one!

I totally know what you mean. I admit, I did want a girl when pregnant. But I KNEW I was having a boy and I was still happy about it. And now that he is here, I would not change it for the world. I was SOOOO offended by the rude things that so many women would say to me. One woman actually said, "Better luck next time." Can you imagine saying something like that? I found that the basic belief is that girls are cute and sweet and boys are rough and get in to trouble.

I also find it offensive when I go clothes shopping for my son and there is about 1/5 the amount of boy clothes as their are girl clothes. And the girl clothes are imaginative and cute while the boy stuff is just functional. Navy t-shirts and jeans. I think it shows the mentality...girls are for decorating and having fun and boys we raise for our husbands. It drives me nuts.

[WickidaWitch]

I LOVE BOYS!!!!

I think when I was pg with my first I would have been disapointed if he was a girl.
With my 2nd I wanted another boy but would have been just a happy if he were a she.
This time around I feel the same way as with # 2. We are having a girl but sometimes I find myself wishing she was a he.
Maybe thats because I have so little experience taking care of girls. Or maybe it's because all the little girls I do know are big ol brats!
The fact that people always assume you'll want a girl because you have a boy already bugs the heck out of me too.

[eilonwy]

Originally posted by TranscendentalMom

I also find it offensive when I go clothes shopping for my son and there is about 1/5 the amount of boy clothes as their are girl clothes. And the girl clothes are imaginative and cute while the boy stuff is just functional. Navy t-shirts and jeans. I think it shows the mentality...girls are for decorating and having fun and boys we raise for our husbands. It drives me nuts.

ITA! This totally drives me nuts! I've taken to making my own cute things for my son, just because I want to see him in cute things that aren't blue or orange. I'm so tired of those colors! I was going to get him a Hanna Andersson snowsuit, but the only boys one they have is orange and navy (not great colors for my son, even if I did like them). There are three for girls, though. : It's so unfair!!

[Graceoc]

I always wanted boys! We were very happy that our first was a boy. There had not been any girls in my DH's family since his mother, so I thougth for sure my dream of all boys would be fulfilled. But then we had DD DH was hoping for a girl, and we were both pretty shocked to find out we were having a girl. If/when we have another one I am secretally still hoping it is a boy - I had alot of sisters, and I think I would prefer to only have one other girl in the house with me! Way too much PMS LOL

[*LoveBugMama*]

Me!! Me!!

I actually was hoping for a boy... I would NOT have been disapointed if I had a girl, though.

But, I got my boy!

I don`t think I want another child, but IF I do, I would be thrilled no matter what sex my baby has. How can anyone NOT be?:

I would be really angry if anyone said things in front of my son that could lead him to believe that he was not what I (and his daddy, too) hoped for.