***High Risk Mamas Support Thread*** - Page 8

[Sage_SS]

Hey guys... I hope you all feel well today! So how many of you have much time left to go on bedrest? Is someone stuck here for the duration like me?

I grew up with a single mom. I have one sister who is almost 4 years younger than me. Our house was a disgusting mess!!! All the time.
It was embarassing. So while I'm not a clean freak I do keep our house clean and we rarely have friends over when our house is less than clean.
BUT
Now, I have to be ok with friends coming over and everything being messy. My hubby does the surface stuff like dishes and vacuuming but everyone neglects the bathrooms and dusting and anything that doesn't immediately try to hurt them when they walk into a room. Friends are coming over today and my room is a mess. It hasn't been dusted in weeks and there is laundry and books everywhere. I'm nervous about them coming tho I know they'll be understanding.

Ugh.. I'm so sick of whining its incredible.

[ChesapeakeBorn]

Well, I am here indefinitely! If I do come off complete bed rest, it won't be until this fall (when I have reached the third trimester).

After 3+ months of bed rest, my body is starting to get restless. That's a new thing for me - just started this week. It wants to be up and moving around. I'd like to think that it knows what is safe, but I am not that trusting until I reach the point of viability this fall. I have been sitting up more (in part due to the sinus issues), rather than lying down, and the scan last week was good, so we'll see how things are at this week's doctor's appointments (1 with the peri to start prog. shots, plus regular OB appt).

aviva, I'm so glad your cervix is holding up!

[avivaelona]

Sage I'm probably not on bedrest for the duration (unless something goes less than ideally) but at least til 32 weeks. I probably will start moving around a little more in September though, DS starts preschool and I do want to be able to help him get adjusted, as long as everything is still going well and the stitch is holding than I will at least be taking him to preschool at first. I think that is like another 5 weeks? I know I'd be at least 24 weeks before I get up more.

I started showing today, just got up this morning and looked pregnant! Its nice, I didn't show before I lost my first, and didn't show with my second til I was 7 months along, and this time I showed a little immediately and then it went away! I was expecting I'd have to wait til 7 months again, but it looks like I won't. Not that it matters much when I'm mostly home, but its nice the few times I'm out to feel like maybe people might realize I'm pregnant.

Oh the good news is that the sciatica eased off yesterday too. Sage, I gained a whole new level of understanding for you. It was HARD to stay positive when I was in pain. I wish it would ease off for you too and I'm so sorry it doesn't seem to be an option.

Can you hire a cleaning person to come? Or explicitly ask a friend to come help clean a bit? I have the opposite reason for needing a cleanish house...my parents are neat freaks, but I'm still embarrassed when my house is sloppy. The difference is that I'm not a neat freak and so my house is usually sloppy...I'm just also usually embarrassed. Its silly.

CB i think the restlessness is a good sign, but it is probably better to err on the safe side if you can stand it.

[ChesapeakeBorn]

Well, I now know not to trust the restlessness... started bleeding again. Uggh. I had spent some time in the sun today to try to get some Vit. D. I guess no more sun for me.

Soulshine, how often do you bleed? I have been bleeding about once a week or so, reddish/brown (like rust kinda) with no discharge in between. Sometimes I get a little achy/crampy when it happens. I am petrified of having a gusher and just pray and pray that my baby will stay safe in my womb until he is old enough to survive on his own. I was just wondering what you are experiencing.

Oh, please God, get us safely to the third trimester (and then some).:

[avivaelona]

CB

[Sage_SS]

Oh CB, I'm so sorry.. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[soulshine]

chesapeake,
i pm'd you with the details that were kind of gross for non sch mommas!!
one question... is the progesterone shot the 'p17' or 'hydroxyprogesterone' shot
that you get once a week? why are you getting it- is it preventative to pre-term labor or is it related to the sch? what did your peri say about it? when is your appointment this week?

sage,
it may feel like whining, but to me, whining applies more toward a situation that the doesn't really warrant the need to complain... hello!! your situation warrants whiney-ness! whine away!
my house is a sticky dirty mess right now. its been humid, and there is a layer of damp air and dog hair all over my house! my mom has been vaccuming, thank goodness. i am sure your friends could care one iota about your dusty clothes-strewn bedroom! it must have been nice to see them!

aviva,
i am sort of officially showing too... i put on a 'real' shirt yesterday, one that i bought before bedrest-ville, and poof! instant pregnant lady. it made my husband really happy... i forget sometimes that for him, the pregnancy is happening in my body, so visual sights like a real-looking pregnant belly are important milestones for him in the pregnancy. i feel this baby moving, but to him, he is just waiting and waiting for december when he can swoop that baby into his arms to be a part of his life.

well, i went on a field trip yesterday... our best friend got married and we decided it would be 'ok' if i went. so it was a 1 1/2 hour ride there, an hour wedding, and then 1/2 hour of reception, and then the ride back. it was alot and half way thru i was really antsy about getting back to safe-bed. but, for the great majority of it i was sitting down doing nothing. and i got to see my best friend get married. which i would have been very sad to miss. it was a hard decision. i was so glad to get back in bed last night!

i have to say it was also weird to be out in public with a very pregnant looking body, people saying congratulations etc... and all the while thinking, well, talk to me in 8 weeks and maybe i can feel better about this...

the baby is getting big though! online, a website said as big as a sweet potato, and my uterus is as big as a cantelope! wow! i am 18wk3d today

[ChesapeakeBorn]

soulshine, well from what I understand 'p17' or 'hydroxyprogesterone' are one in the same (http://www.hydroxyprogesterone.com/), but the term they are using for me is 'P17'. It is to ward off preterm labor, even though my cervix was holding up at the last u/s. With DD, they discovered that I was dilating and effaced at around 32-33 weeks (don't know exactly when it started) and I thought I was just having braxton-hicks! So we are doing the P17 shots because 1) I have a history of preterm labor and 2) because SCH puts you at higher risk for preterm labor. My appointment is on Thursday. I just started having braxton-hicks and let me tell you, that appointment can't come soon enough.

That's awesome that you got to go to the wedding! I am supposed to be in a wedding on Sept. 13th, but I am too scared! And my daughter's 6th birthday party is on Aug 23rd. It will be a pool party 20 minutes away from home and I am nervous about that too. I plan to park myself in a lounge chair and try not to move. I keep telling myself that it is even better than a trip to the doctor's (an hour away).

I so get you about the "congratulations" thing. I think every time "don't congratulate me yet".

[avivaelona]

Today its my turn to feel sorry for myself. I'm just really tired of being on bedrest. I know I can get up and do some little things but I'm crampy today and I think driving irritates the sciatica, and I just feel both too worried to be up much and horribly restless and lonely. My friends are just not too good at being supportive...I could use visitors but no one will ever think to do it unless I ask, and I'm not great at asking. I don't really have good friends here anyway.

If I felt good I'd just go out somewhere for a little while but I don't like it when I have crampy days, it worries me. I'm one day from halfway done but with only 6 weeks of bedrest done and at least 6-8 more to go it feels like so much right now. Plus I dunno, some days have been crampy but it always makes me feel scared even though so far its been ok.

I think the fact that this is when we lost Isaac is really having more of an effect than I want to admit...if I've been getting stir crazy I've been making sure I get a little outing, but in the past week I just feel like I need to be down on the sofa all the time. I don't want to ignore that feeling, but I do wonder if its real or if its just fear. Either way I don't think I have too much choice til it passes.

Ok my self pitying whine is out. How is everyone doing? CB are you bleeding still? Sage are you getting some sleep? Soulshine, how goes it? Where is Blair?

[soulshine]

aviva,
yes, i know about the bedrest!! i read a few posts back about you and chesapeake going till the 3rd trimester, and sage for the long haul, i think it woke me up- all this time i think i have maybe 2 more weeks and then i can magically be done with it! but, not seeing any improvement in the sch, i feel like i am in it for much longer than my 2 weeks fantasy.

do you all maybe think it is harder to be on bedrest in the summer? in the winter, maybe it is easier? i tend to hibernate anyway, so it wouldn't be that much of a stretch. but the summer? my busiest time and it is surreal to be watching 'general hospital' day in and day out...

also, aviva, *big hug*. the memories associated to isaac's loss, whether they be calender-related, or gestational, or really, any similarities can trigger you on many different levels- sometimes obvious, like you just break out and cry, and sometimes you don't even know what's wrong, but something is... its a lifelong grieving process, that is what i am learning. maybe not for everyone, but the grief really has long lasting and very deep affects on people. the memories and triggers are difficult on their own, but when they overlap with what you are going thru now, it makes it that much more complex.

wow!!! when we all have our babies in december, there is going to be a MAJOR celebration!!! big party on the bedrest thread in late december and we're all invited! bye bye bed!! see ya cramps! adios, pain!! hel-lo, baby!!

i have a growth scan on friday. had a thought the other day that what if the u/s tech was wrong and that was actually baby's umbilical cord and NOT a penis!

here's a question. where are your babies in your belly, in comparison to your pubic bone and your belly button? does that make sense? my uterus is right about up to my belly button, but baby seems to be hanging out more toward my pubic bone. for some reason, looking at the size of my relatively enormous belly, considering baby is only the size of a sweet potato, seems like he should be up higher!!

anyway.

yes, where is blair? blair, hope you're doing well

sage, how is this week treating you? have you needed to take any meds? any good days mixed in? will your kids go back to school in the late summer? i think of you each day/

chesapeake, how are you hanging in there? i hope you have a good time at your daughter's b-day party! bank up alot of resting-time before and after that day, and i hope you can enjoy it parked next to the pool! sounds like fun

here's another question. i spend most of my tie in bed in a semi-reclined postition. is this ok? should i be on my sides? when does that vena-cava (???) vein start getting squished? i try to sleep on my sides but i get so sore in my legs, so i sometimes wake up on my back or some contorted blend of side and back. just curious if any of your hcp's have addressed this.

[Sage_SS]

Aviva, I'm sorry that you're feeling so frustrated! I know just how you feel tho, so you're not there alone! I'm no good at asking for anything either.
Lots of hugs for you mama... If you have msn, we can chat and play games!

I'm feeling frustrated and irritated too. I don't want to be alone, but everyone is driving me insane. I don't know if its some weird kind of jealousy because they get to DO stuff, or if its just the lack of sleep and stress of the pain.

I last took pain meds two days ago. I'm trying to avoid them. I feel like I'm falling apart inside. The ONLY thing that comforts me at all is feeling this baby move. And the fact that neither of us is in any danger.
I've talked to so many OB's about this and all of them have told me the only course of treatment is T3. THIS OB tells me there's a risk of the baby getting addicted to the T3. Now that worry is just sitting at the back on my mind, rotting there. What if the baby DOES get addicted to them? I don't take them everyday, but still.. What if we have a baby that spends its first 6months screaming constantly? What if it has health problems? So much stress. A health nurse came by yesterday, my blood pressure is 100/60 and my pulse is 47. Both of those are really low. My doc hasn't started me on the blood thinners yet, what if something goes wrong?
My pubic bone feels like its going to split in half. It hurts.

On the bright side I've finally started creating that home management binder I've been wanting to do for years. And I've written to a couple of friends. I taught the girls how to braid. I've painted fingers and toes. Repeatedly.

[ChesapeakeBorn]

oh, aviva, I am there too. I have been getting restless, but I still have a long way to go. I have crampy days too and it really worries me...

You know, I am finding this stage of the pregnancy almost more difficult than the first trimester, mentally. I am so close to that first point of viability, baby has so much personality already... I wonder if I will have preterm labor this time and if it will be even earlier than last time because of the added irritant of the SCH. I had one day over the weekend when I had a bunch of contractions, I have had a couple a day ever since. And my cervix hurts. Maybe it is all because I started bleeding again (once on Sunday, and again last night), but I don't want that to put me into labor!! Last Thursday my cervix was long and closed. We'll see how it looks today when I go for my peri appt.

soulshine: I was wondering about the vena cava thing too. I spend most of my time on my side but my hips get sore and I would like to safely prop up some (although I tend to get more contractions that way....). I am going to ask my doctor today.

sage: I am so so sorry you are hurting! I don't think that the baby could get addicted if you take the pain meds sporadically. I would think that might happen if you take them round the clock, you know? But not the way you are taking them. You have to do what you have to do, mama.

I had a dream last night that our son was born at 21 weeks, but he was okay... I think. He was much like our daughter the day after she was born - all she wanted to do was sleep and she wasn't interested in nursing much. When we took him to the NICU, they weren't too worried. He actually weighed 6lbs, 4oz! But I was still concerned because he was groggy. The way he felt against my chest was so real. At one point he turned into a pigeon and ran across the street. I panicked that this LO we had worked so hard to bring into the world would get hit by a car, but he didn't. I don't really get the dream - 21 weeks really is too early. And babies don't turn into birds. Fortunately, I take all my dreams with a grain of salt. They can be pretty wacky sometimes.

[avivaelona]

That is a wacky dream CB. I'm glad you have your peri appointment today, most likely it will reassure you but at least if something is going on you will know what it is. I'm sorry about the bleeds, I wish they would stop for you and Soulshine, I'm sure its scary each time.

Sage I think the doctor just didn't want you to take it all the time, I'm sure there are people who really would, I do think you need to take enough that you are getting reasonable amounts of sleep, I don't think the things that happen to your body when you are severely sleep deprived are good for babies either.

I think for the most part you notice when you are compressing your vena cava, you get tingly or might even feel faint. For most people it isn't really an issue until the 8th or 9th month. I do a lot of propped lying but I try to not lie on my tailbone because it gets irritated if I do, so either I recline but still at least somewhat sitting up or I lie on my side most of the time. If you put a pillow behind you, you can be a little more toward your back but still on your side. I find that helps with my hips.

I had a lousy nights sleep last night, for some unknown reason...just couldn't fall asleep or stay asleep. I'm a little less grumpy than yesterday so far though, so I hope that stays.

[ChesapeakeBorn]

soulshine, I forgot to respond to your question about the location of our babies... My uterus is almost to my belly button, but my baby hangs out pretty low too, just above my pubic bone. When I was at the peri's office last week, I asked if it was normal for him to be this low at this stage and they said yes.

[Sage_SS]

I often wonder about the vena cava thing too. The baby is most active when I'm on my side. Weird...

I keep trying to reel myself in, don't get all wrapped up in this. This is a better day. My mil has the girls until Friday so its pretty quiet here. My friend is coming over soon.

I hope you guys are feeling well!

[avivaelona]

Sage there is someone on the general pregnancy board asking about symptoms that sound like your issue.

Today my baby is half baked and my bigger baby is 3.5, we made a cake with a half white confectioners sugar and half cocoa decorating the top. The cake was not half baked though, it was chocolatey yum.

Today was better and my DH came home with my new computer which I'm not using yet but I should be by the end of the evening.

[ChesapeakeBorn]

So I asked the peri about being on my back and he said you will know when not to do it because you will get uncomfortable, dizzy, etc..

Today's u/s looked fine. Cervix is holding up. They told me to call if I have more than 4 contractions in an hour. It can be normal to have some contractions at this point, we just have to be careful because of my history and the bleed. I also got my first p17 shot - didn't hurt all that bad! I go back next week and then every two weeks to scan the cervix.

Aviva, I was wondering if you are getting the P17 shots (you may have already told me but I have a horrible memory these days). They were telling me more about it today and apparently it targets the cervix to keep it from dilating/shortening. It is effective for and intended for people who have had/do have an incompetent cervix. For me, they don't know why I was dilating/effaced with DD - it may have been due to IC or it may have been due to contractions. If it is the latter, then P17 won't help me, only terbutaline or magnesium. But since we aren't sure what caused my problems with DD, we need to cover our bases. Anyways, you probably know all this, but I thought of you when they were telling me about it. Congrats on the new computer!

[avivaelona]

I do know about them CB but my Peri's office is not in favor for those with IC and no preterm labor. I'm not really sure why, I think they are just conservative. I looked into them with J.'s pregnancy but they didn't do them and there are no other peri's in the area and so I decided not to start driving to Boston or whatever and see how it went.

Since his pregnancy went so well without them, and so far this one is too I think maybe I don't need them, but I do sometimes wish my doctor did them...I'd just feel like I was doing every thing possible you know?

[Sage_SS]

Thats great about your cervix CB! I hope things start to look up!

Aviva, happy bday to your big one! I posted on the thread you mentioned, and another one about the same kind of pain. This is the only thread I even check on when I log onto MDC, so I don't see many others.

My friend brought me an iced capp and some timbits! She stayed for a few hours, she's such a sweety.

Oh man, I'm hurting. I took a couple of pain killers last night but I think I have to take a couple more. This is getting ridiculous. Thank gods I see my OB next week because I have quite a few concerns I need to talk to him about.

Is it just us four left here? Where'd everyone go? Hopefully they're out of the woods and into happy pregnancy land!

[avivaelona]

There weren't many of us anyway, I'm wondering where Blair went because I haven't seen her post anywhere for a while.

I'm on my new computer, the keyboard is very different so I keep making typos but I love it.

What are Timbits? Good friend to bring treats.

I'm sleepy I should head to bed but I'm too excited about playing on the computer