GDing the Explosive Child

[InochiZo]

Anybody else with this type of personality child. The descriptive title of the book said it all to me, "The easily frustrated and chronically inflexible child." I immediate said, "I NEED this book" I think I need some buddies too. http://www.explosivechild.com/

I just ordered the book. I think we already do a lot of stuff in the book but I haven't gotten to read it yet. I would love to connect with other mama's trying to gently parent these kiddos. Actually, I think GD is the only way to parent these kids or you'd be beating the crap of them.

This AM DS woke and was about to have a meltdown before I had to leave for work and he said, "Just lay down and go to sleep with me. Mama set your timer for 5 min." I set my timer for 5 min. It went off and he said, "Ok mama you can go."

I think DS is actually pretty mild but still very challenging and difficult at times.

[j924]

Excellent book. My explosive child just turned 9. I wish I had read it when she was much younger, but it has been amazing to watch the transformation. Plan B really does work. Good luck.

[jrose_lee]

OH my!!! Me! Me! I am going crazy. I think I need this book. Badly. Especially after tonight :frown
We are very GD, but ds is losing it. All.the.time. And becoming violent and explosive and even more frustrated. And extremely inflexible. Not flexible at all. Freaks out over the smallest things. Ah!

Granted....we just moved across the country and a lot of new stuff going on. But...well, this book is just him. Sigh.

[jrose_lee]

hmmmm...maybe it's a little early for this. Are ALL two year olds this way? I don't know..he's my first, but he sure doesn't seem to act like any other kids sometimes and he's a handfull, highspirited, high needs for sure.

[ma_vie_en_rose]

Great book! My DSD has early onset bipolar disorder. I absolutely agree that GD is the only way to deal with this type of child. I believe anything else will make it worse.

[honeysesame]

hmmm.... interesting. ds (6) would definitely be on the mild end of the spectrum yet i do recognize some of these behaviors in him for sure.... would any of you mamas be willing to share a few ideas that have worked for you? i read the excerpt from the book on the site and am interested to hear more about his approach. thanks....

[j924]

The thing that resounded the loudest for me was that kids do well IF they can. It wasn't my parenting for better or worse that made my kid like this and when she could do better she would. I don't want to paraphrase him too much but he relies heavily on Plan B. Plan A being authoriatrian and Plan C being permissive. Plan B is figuring out a problem and each side coming to doable solutions. It is much more than that obviously. This is a well worth it read. It works wonders for my explosive kid and for the others that are not so explosive.

[Janelovesmax]

i read the book and i thought it was great.
i read it when my ds was only 2 years old, but now that he is 3, he is becoming more and more explosive. i think i need to reread the book to refresh my memory.
Does anyone have an experience whether or not plan B works for toddlers his age??

[Magella]

According to the authors, a child needs the skills of a typically developing 3 year old in order for Plan B to work well.

[honeysesame]

this idea is really eye-opening for me. this morning ds (6 yo) replied enthusiastically to my questions about what for breakfast with his whole specific plan of how he likes breakfast these days (toast, butter, jam, runny egg yolk from fried egg on top of that, and then scrambled egg on top of that!) and i set about making it (we make scrambled and fried anyhow, so no trouble) but for one reason and another didn't get the eggs right so the fried fell apart and ds quickly despaired and before i could offer problem-solving ideas began a full blown tantrum with yelling crying and kicking and screaming.... i just tried to remain present and calm and tell him i was glad to try to work it out when he was ready that i had a few ideas, and after a few minutes we did.... dh even didn't intervene, just closed the door to the room ds eventually landed in and said something half sarcastically to me (ds couldn't hear) about letting him have his feelings (any ideas to get dh a little more on my page?).... i wonder if my approach helped toward quicker equilibrium? anyhow, sorry to ramble on, but does this sound like an explosive child kind of thing?

[a(TM)?Star]

I'm really glad to see this post. I'm off to the library to see if they carry this book. I'll be back.


BTW, this thread may be a sign, ds spent the entire 2 days crying.

[honeysesame]

how funny that we have had a most explosive day after being exposed to these ideas. evening was way worse than breakfast. i'm really interested to hear other people's experiences and ideas/methods. i find myself staying calm to a point and then feeling really angry and like ds is spoiled/anal/inconsiderate. how do you avoid this? or, inochizo, what did you have in mind for the thread....?
ETA: i do want to get the book, too....

[anudi01]

This is my 4 yr old...

need to read this book.

subbing

[umami_mommy]

i highly recommend the yahoo consensual living group.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Consensual-living/

[lactivist]

I keep meaning to get this book. Looks like my trip to the library needs to happen this week.
Wendi

[umami_mommy]

OT: wendi, i love the smilies you picked for your kids.

[lmkirche]

Has anyone viewed the DVD?
It looks interesting. . .but $56?
It's definately worth it if it is as good as you all say it is.

[lmkirche]

What age would you say this is for?

[lactivist]

Honeybee ~ Thanks! They seemed appropriate.

I need a book called the Explosive Parent today.

Wendi

[umami_mommy]

Originally Posted by lmkirche

What age would you say this is for?

all ages. applied to my son when he was 18 months old.