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The Queer & Pregnant thread -- June, July, and August - Page 4

post #61 of 468
7/11/08 at 11:13am
5w 5d, and I think I officially have morning sickness. It's been building for a few days, but. Ooooooooooooh. :Puke
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post #62 of 468
7/11/08 at 1:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by simcon View Post
That's amazing that you're thinking of those sorts of details already, giggleblue! I'm so far from that at the moment--I think this is all going to happen way faster than I'm anticipating... my sister convinced me to sign up for a registry at Babies R Us (not that we need much from there for #2, but she had a coupon for a $10 gift card that you could get if you created a registry)--she is all purposeful and on top of this stuff (and due in August) while I'm feeling like a total pg lazybones, just shooting the scanner at random things... And I'm just hoping her babe grows out of her newborn prefolds before ours is born, so I can inherit them nice and smoothly and not have to worry about much (we have lots of the bigger sizes, but had a diaper service for the newborn size...).
we are going to have two little ones on the way so we are trying to be as prepared as possible. by september, i'm hoping to have the baby room set up. i'm sure neither of us will be able to function well in the third trimester anyway, so we are trying to get everything done as early as possible!

since a lot of our friends and family live in other states, we are going to do a registery online at amazon.com and then do another one in store at target. i'm likeing the online amazon one, because shipping is free on a lot of their items! we may wind up buying our diapers ourselves, just because i think it will be easier and cheaper to do that, than soliciting them from others. our registry will mainly consists of the basics, like bedding and bathroom things, as well as some odds and ends. we aren't going to register too much for clothes because we decided that we would wait until the babies got here to see what sex they are.

that may be interesting! i'm hoping it will save us from a bunch of pink crap if we have a girl. i hate pink!
post #63 of 468
7/11/08 at 2:08pm
pink crap happens... good luck avoiding it
post #64 of 468
7/11/08 at 7:17pm
Howdy Y'all! Can you add me to due April 09?

I am so amazed to be here so quickly, and I know what you mean giggleblue, about not wanting to sound like you are gloating. I am truly astounded. I don't know most of you, although in the two months I was over on the TTC thread, I got to know a little bit about some of you. S&D, Pigirl (also read as pig-girl, until I thought about it and checked the spelling), giggleblue, I know your names!!
post #65 of 468
7/11/08 at 10:26pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pigirl View Post

Third, is anyone else's partner getting sympathic morning sickness? Mine appears to be, and he's really not happy about it. I find it hilarious.

Fourth, I saw some EWCM yesterday (which was 5w 2d), and started feeling what seem like light ovulation pains today. Just on the right side, which would be the side I'm due to ovulate on next. Anyone else feel anything like that?

1-No morning sickness, but "crabby" I second that! She's been irritable and insensitive. We had a long talk (with some tears on my part of course lol) about her attitude. She's SO excited about the baby, but she admitted the pregnancy part hasn't sunk in yet. I have so much on my mind right now. "Am I doing this right?", "I'm so tired," etc. For me, it's sunk in!

2-EWCM...yes! For the past couple of days. Not crazy, but there. I'm glad I read that it's a good thing! Also, no morning sickness. I've been glad until I read in the Sears book that "statistics show that the more nausea a mother has, the more likely she is to deliver a healthy baby." And it goes on from there. Ouch. I'm not going to lie, it bothered me. I felt a little better after I saw what other mothers had to say on Yahoo. Thoughts?

3-Anyone having any trouble sleeping? : I feel like I'm never really comfortable. I'm a back sleeper to start out, then a side sleeper. Every time I lay on my back (which feels comfortable at first) I feel that ligament thing in my abdomen that everyone has mentioned and have to roll again. Between that and peeing...I'm even more tired!! ...But I wouldn't trade it for the world
post #66 of 468
7/12/08 at 12:03am
Welcome MamaCaveBear! And giggleblue too!

Hey, for you mamas with experience ... is it normal to have the nausea and sore boobage subside in the first trimester? I'm 9 weeks, and worried that the easing of symptoms means something bad. I was super nauseas, etc up until yesterday.
Reassurance? Help?
I'll go take a dose of Rescue Remedy now.
post #67 of 468
7/12/08 at 12:32am
Quote:
Originally Posted by starling&diesel View Post
Welcome MamaCaveBear! And giggleblue too!

Hey, for you mamas with experience ... is it normal to have the nausea and sore boobage subside in the first trimester? I'm 9 weeks, and worried that the easing of symptoms means something bad. I was super nauseas, etc up until yesterday.
Reassurance? Help?
I'll go take a dose of Rescue Remedy now.
Yup. My boobs got better around week 9 and my nausea subsided for a minute at week 10 only to come back with a vengeance for weeks 11-14 before it finally left the building altogether. Now i just get the most painful nipples EVER when I'm cold and occasionally have stabbing pain and horribleness but it never lasts much more than half an hour and I'm trying to get used to it, imagining that it's probably the kind of pain that early breastfeeding and mastitis brings.

I feel weird being the person giving reassurance because I was a paranoid neurotic mess up until week 12 (as many of you will recall).

Flower essences got me through the first trimester. Go the rescue remedy and if that doesn't help, get yourself to the naturopath so they can tailor something just for you!
post #68 of 468
7/12/08 at 1:00am
I think it's all normal, S&D. My nausea subsided... um... this week.

And I'm 20 weeks tomorrow.

mmm - yeah, kinda, I guess... mastitis is a whole 'nother ball of evilness. Nasty, nasty. *keep away mastitis vibes :*
post #69 of 468
7/12/08 at 9:31am
Quote:
Originally Posted by JenInMpls View Post
pink crap happens... good luck avoiding it

Hello, all! Joining Due Sept 29th

I won't be finding out the sex of this babe, but I just wanted to say that I don't mind pink but I hope no one gets us a bunch of purple if it's a girl! Can't stand pink and purple together
post #70 of 468
7/12/08 at 12:03pm
Thread Starter 
I made all the changes -- I think. Let me know if I missed anyone.

I think I have kind of been going through a funk lately. Don't get me wrong...I am so excited to be pregnant and for this baby. I love this babe. I really, really do. But I am having a hard time.

I am having a really hard time feeling connected to this baby. With my last pregnancy, I felt so connected and attached to that little thing. I loved it so much. I felt towards that child as is ideal for a person carrying a child -- an overwhelming sense of love, protection, attachment, all of that.

While I do love this child, I do not feel the same sense of being connected, attached, and in tune. I thought I would start to feel that when I had the ultrasound...I have had two now. I thought I would definitely feel that sense when I heard the heartbeat...I think I have heard it three times now.

Other people do not really get it. I should be so excited, but it's hard to get as excited as last time when I am still grieving the loss of my first child. What the hell am I gonna do? It seems like everyone else has forgotten the first. Of course they have, they did not carry it. I just keep thinking that I should be holding my little baby in my arms right now....and that makes it harder to feel connected to this baby. I really do not know what to do. I know this is going to sound awful, but I really want the first baby back. But that's not going to happen, huh? Please do not think I am awful for saying that...it's not that I do not love this baby. Not at all.

Any ideas? While we wanted to not find out the sex until birth, I am now trying to convince DW to let us find out (this was supposed to be completely her decision). I wonder if finding out will help me feel more connected -- I will be able to call the baby by name and that might help.
post #71 of 468
7/12/08 at 12:13pm
It's completely understandable that you'd be feeling this way after a loss. One thing to keep in mind is that the other babe paved the way for this one that you're carrying now. Have you talked with a good pregnancy-loss counselor or therapist in your area? They can help tremendously.

On the issue of finding out the sex, I suspect that it might fall into the same category as other things you thought would help to feel connected (us, heartbeat) but ended up not helping. Because of that, I think leaving this up to your DW is probably better for her sense of involvement in the pregnancy and for your relationship. I think that there are other, better ways of helping you into feeling connected. Talking to a pregnancy-loss/traumatic-birth counselor would really help; do you have that option in your area? The pregnancy loss board here could be helpful to you.

You are physically connected to this babe, and I know that once you are able to really grieve your loss you will be able to feel emotionally connected to this new babe as well.
post #72 of 468
7/12/08 at 5:15pm
2hm I am so sorry for how you are feeling. I've not experienced birth loss, but I've heard from so many mothers who feel that sense of emptiness when they should be holding their little ones, even if they're pregnant.

If it's any consolation (and it might not be, because I haven't ever miscarried), I didn't feel much attachment to my first, either, when he was in utero. All the stuff I heard, especially in yoga class, about "communicate with your baby..." just didn't resonate with me. My heart never swelled or overflowed with love.

However you feel is valid. I'm no therapist, I don't know the right things to say or the right questions to ask... but I can always validate feelings.

My crunchy, spiritual self is to send a lot of thoughts to the baby and see what comes to you in your dreams... if you go for that kind of stuff.

:
post #73 of 468
7/12/08 at 6:53pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pigirl View Post
5w 5d, and I think I officially have morning sickness. It's been building for a few days, but. Ooooooooooooh. :Puke
And in a very weird way, HOORAY FOR AM SICKNESS! :Puke
At least we're on the way right? I am so happy to anticipate being ill for 4 months again...

Oh and to the dear Thread Keeper, for some reason one of the due date calculators put me as due 4/1, another changed it to 3/26, and yet another 3/19. So if I go for the middle ground, would that make it March for me then? Or was the first an April fool's joke? hehe. Can you change me to March 09?
post #74 of 468
7/12/08 at 8:09pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Erica12009 View Post
2-EWCM...yes! For the past couple of days. Not crazy, but there. I'm glad I read that it's a good thing! Also, no morning sickness. I've been glad until I read in the Sears book that "statistics show that the more nausea a mother has, the more likely she is to deliver a healthy baby." And it goes on from there. Ouch. I'm not going to lie, it bothered me. I felt a little better after I saw what other mothers had to say on Yahoo. Thoughts?
Hey, Erica. Morning sickness usually doesn't start until 6w, so it's most likely not that you're not having it, just that it hasn't started yet. I bet you feel pretty crummy next week. Mine has only just started up, and I'm early for everything.
post #75 of 468
7/12/08 at 8:10pm
MamaCaveBear-- welcome! : I'm thrilled to see you in here.
post #76 of 468
7/12/08 at 10:08pm
Thread Starter 
Anybody wanna see pictures of my love belly? If so, check it out! I have always been so freaking self-conscious of my gut, but I am starting to appreciate it more.

Has anyone else's body image been affected by pregnancy?
post #77 of 468
7/12/08 at 10:37pm
I am so grouchy. I feel like I'm possessed by the devil himself I just got in a huge fight with DP about what kind of paint you're supposed to use on trim. This left me in tears and she had to go to work, so now I'm sitting here miserable - but definitely still mad. It was a stupid fight that we would not have had if I had any control over my tongue at the moment.

Do grouchiness and mood swings go away after the first trimester?

2happymamas - your belly is beautiful! I can't wait for mine to look like that
post #78 of 468
7/13/08 at 1:50pm
giggleblue, a stainless step-lid trash can is on sale at Target this week for $30 - a good deal!!
post #79 of 468
7/13/08 at 3:34pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2happymamas View Post
Anybody wanna see pictures of my love belly? If so, check it out! I have always been so freaking self-conscious of my gut, but I am starting to appreciate it more.

Has anyone else's body image been affected by pregnancy?
I hear what you're saying, definitely. I feel fat, not pregnant, this early in the game. I'm just disgusted with the back fat coming on. My belly=cute; My back fat=gross. : I'm reading Belly Laughs, it's great fun and it makes ya laugh about stuff like this.

Your love belly is wonderful! I'm glad you're appreciating it more.
post #80 of 468
7/13/08 at 3:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by pranava View Post
I am so grouchy.
Do grouchiness and mood swings go away after the first trimester?

I'm wondering the same. If it makes you feel any better my wife and I have been getting in little blow-outs too. I hope you have a better day
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