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How did you survive your first solo-day w/the kids?  

post #1 of 20
6/30/08 at 1:33am
Thread Starter 
Tips? Thoughts? Encouragement?

I've got 4 now... almost 6 yrs, 4.5, 22m and my 1w old... I'm worried, to say the least... tomorrow is DH's first day back to work - very very sad. I need some lift-me-up...
post #2 of 20
6/30/08 at 3:59am
The first day was so hard for me. Really this last week was difficult. But I at least have the 8 and 12 year old to help me. The 2 yo is the biggest problem.

The night before dh went back to work I had him make food for me and leave it in the fridge because it's impossible to get food any other way. I made sure he started the neccessary laundry for the day so everyone had underwear and diapers. And I sat on the couch with the kids watching movies all day. All the stuff in between really sucked, but we got through it.

My bleeding keeps stopping but then I have to do something that I shouldn't be doing yet like vacuuming and I gush bright red.

Just take it easy and remember that a lot of the stuff you think is importnant isn't and everyday that you take it easy is another day closer to be healed.

Where are you in the NW. I think you told me before. I'm in Salem, Oregon. Do you have a friend that can come sit with you for part of the day?
post #3 of 20
6/30/08 at 1:44pm
I only have one toddler plus the babe and I've been dreading the day I'm left with the two of them. That day is here and its going really well so far. Dh is coming home early so I've only got another two hours or so. My 3yo has been really busy this last week since the baby was born. Dh and grandma have been keeping her out and about and not getting to see me or the baby so I think she's enjoying having a nice quiet day. Of course, that probably won't last and by the end of the week, I'll be ready to pull my hair out no doubt.

I hear ya about the bleeding. Mine was almost gone yesterday morning and then I took dd1 to the grocery store to get some diapers, pads, and a nightlight and then went to MIL's for Sunday Dinner and started gushing. Today I'm really resisting the urge to vaccuum but the house really needs it. I usually vac on Saturdays so its now been two weeks I think and with a thick black haired dog and dh in construction and dd spending time in the garden and the kiddie pool filled with grass - the house it nasty but I really don't want to overdo it so I'm trying to not look at the floor at all.
post #4 of 20
6/30/08 at 4:39pm
Thread Starter 
It's pretty much sucking so far...
: sigh :
post #5 of 20
6/30/08 at 4:47pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirthFree View Post
It's pretty much sucking so far...
: sigh :
Oh, no! I was just getting online to see how you were doing!! I've been left alone with the kids for only short periods of time and it's been okay, but I'm dreading when he's back full-time. It's really the 3 year old that drives me crazy so usually dh takes her, no matter where he's going. But, alas, she can't very well go with him to work!

The hardest part for me is going to be the driving. My oldest needs to be driven to gymnastics 5 days/week (twice on 2 days, so 14 trips all together). With a baby that wants to nurse constantly and on HER schedule, it's going to be hard on her to be in the car so much.

Oh, I also signed the kids up for swimming lessons! Two weeks, every morning, 3 out of 4 of them (after we drop my dd at gymnastics), starting dh's first day back to work. What was I thinking???!!!
post #6 of 20
6/30/08 at 4:50pm


It seems so soon to be on your own - but I understand that you gotta do what you gotta do. I won't be on my own for as long as possible. I'm not sure how we'll stretch it out. Dh is off this week, then mom is taking 2 kids for a week or two and I'll have a sitter taking care of dd1 since I don't need to be lifting her. Then we'll see what happens next.

On a slightly different note, I have signed ds up for things next fall (I homeschool him) and totally forgot I'll have a baby strapped to me! I have no idea what I was thinking...

Even w/dh here - we're doing alot of things we normally wouldn't - tv is on, hand held games are everywhere, we're snacking on chips and dip. I'm not superwoman and I don't care what dh has to do to manage, lol. It's summer - I just want to keep things as relaxed as possible.

Take it as easy as you can. I hope tomorrow is better. Hugs
post #7 of 20
6/30/08 at 5:01pm
Today is the first day with dp back at work and my mom being gone. So far, so good. I had to get up and go to town so we were in town all morning....trip to the pregnancy outreach, the grocery store, then I stopped at the park b/c ds2 needed to eat and ds1 was relatively well behaved at the store.
We just got home and ds2 is still asleep in his carseat so I tidied a bit and now company is on my doorstep!
post #8 of 20
6/30/08 at 5:04pm
I was just thinking - did you get your placenta encaps. yet? I know that you felt really good about it's healing/emotional benefits. I took your advice and had dh prepare mine yesterday. I would really like to put a banner in my sig that said dh encapsulated my placenta b/c I don't think every man would, lol. I woke up this morning to my daily allotment of capsules on the counter Isn't that hysterical??
post #9 of 20
6/30/08 at 5:23pm
Thread Starter 
That's great! What a DH.

I did get mine done, but it's not ME, it's my two oldest boys who think today they can take advantage of the fact that DH is gone and can walk all over me and "gang up"... what is with that cr@p??? Needless to say today the numerous times I've heard "Logan hit meeeee", I've either ignored it or finally said to hit him back. Why the freaking heck a 6 year old chooses to hit when it's been a freaking family RULE for over a year is beyond me. I've absolutely had it up to as far as I can take it today already and it's only 1:30. I could just sit them both in time out the ENTIRE day but that seems unrealistic no? But they keep doing things that put them there. What the he!l...

I'm so frustrated.


And through this Jade is sleeping away b/c she didn't go to sleep until midnight last night and will probably do the same again today b/c she's sleeping too much... all b/c I'm dealing with freaking everyone else.

I want to cry. It's only Monday mid-day.
post #10 of 20
6/30/08 at 5:35pm
s

It won't be like this forever. Things will settle into a new routine soon enough. I remind myself that whenever I am feeling overwhelmed- it has helped so far.
post #11 of 20
6/30/08 at 7:38pm
Yeah, *eventually* there will be a new normal and everything will be okay

Believe it or not, my 10 and 4 yr. old fight almost incessantly. Because dd models herself after her older bro, he believes she's 10 and it's a level playing field. After yrs. of learning the no hitting rule in preschool, ds did stop hitting until he turned 8 or 9 when he felt it was okay to hit his sister who is over 6 yrs. younger than him: We might have it under control at the moment but it took forever. I have had plenty of embarassing, shameful parenting moments when I had had it w/them.

Tomorrow is a new day!
post #12 of 20
6/30/08 at 9:48pm
Thread Starter 
Thank God I get to try it again tomorrow... that it won't be like this forever. Phew!!
post #13 of 20
6/30/08 at 10:30pm
NOW I remember where you are! Your way the freak up and over there! Crap, to far for me! It's a shame we don't live closer to eachother. We could be miserable together! Like I said before, do you have a friend that can come sit with you for a couple hours tomorrow?
post #14 of 20
6/30/08 at 11:46pm
Well, yesterday and today were my first "real" solo days. My mom left town around 1:00 yesterday and DH didn't get home from out of town until 6:30. Today was my first day "on" - but he works from home, so he was able to help here and there.

The main way I survived is that DS has taken some AMAZING naps for the past 2 days - like 2 hour naps!!! This means that I get a nap too. I'm so thankful that DH has a flexible schedule and has no overnight travel this week. That will be the *real* test I think...

Hang in there everyone! I know people figure this out eventually... we will too.
post #15 of 20
7/1/08 at 12:52am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mandalin24kd View Post
Like I said before, do you have a friend that can come sit with you for a couple hours tomorrow?
Yeah... but they'd add in their kids too.
My DH gave them a talking to today when he got home (re: their Soooooo unhelpfulness) and that might do some good... but likely, it's the adjustment they're going through (it'd be something to add a sibling, I'm sure. I'm a set of twins and we were the only kids, so I don't know). I'm going to try to have more patience and if they try to do a little less ganging, we'll probably be ok.

Thank God for nap time. That's all I have to say.
post #16 of 20
7/1/08 at 1:46pm
I don't really have to try it until next week........but in the hour or so before my help comes after dh leaves......oh my. if i were dealing with ds from 6 days ago, it would be ok. i dont know who this little boy is
post #17 of 20
7/1/08 at 3:07pm
Well between the trip to town and the massive amounts of company that came in the afternoon (my neighbour, some relatives of dp, and my dad) I managed to get through it. Ds2 was good all day....his worst time is from 8pm to 11pm it seems. I actually broke down and took him for a drive last night. It worked....he slept for 3.5 hrs straight in the carseat so dp and I managed some sleep too. After that he was content to come to bed with me and nurse to sleep until 6am.
I don't understand why he can go to sleep so easily during the day and fight it so hard come evening.
He is actually sleeping in my bed by himself right now! At night, not a chance.

Dp is off today for the holiday and has to work late shift tomorrow (2:30-11pm). Not looking forward to trying to do bedtime with ds1 with a screaming baby by myself.
post #18 of 20
7/1/08 at 6:42pm
all around

My dd was slightly less good today but OK. Thank GOD I bought a wrap sling - it is so much easier to do stuff with the lo happily asleep in there. I just wish I wasn't still so tired. Its only been 10 days and I'm still not up to being up and about too much or my bleeding starts heavy again. Yesterday, we ventured the very short walk to the library for a quick trip and today we just went outside for awhile but not long enough.

I am seriously considering getting cable which I've never had in my life except in college just so I could turn it on any time for dd or watch myself when I feel stuck and bored in the glider rocker nursing the lo. Hoping I can hold out long enough and I'll be feeling better and can add a nice hour long walk and some short trips out to our routine which should keep dd1 happier.

Next week my MIL will be back from Europe and she's off for the summer so that will help too. She'll want to take dd1 places or we can all go together.
post #19 of 20
7/2/08 at 9:02am
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirthFree View Post
It's pretty much sucking so far...
: sigh :
Oh to you! I've dreading it too!!!
post #20 of 20
7/2/08 at 9:03am
Quote:
Originally Posted by BirthFree View Post
Thank God for nap time. That's all I have to say.
How many of your boys still nap?
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