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Queer TTC July 2008! - Page 2

post #21 of 440
Just checking in... It has only been 2 1/2 weeks that we have been on a break and I don't know what to do with myself. In the past, although the attempts were unsuccessful at least we were trying, now I feel that opportunities are passing me by. basically because I think that I o'd this weekend. I can't help but thinking what if that was the egg and I missed it. I am just whining I know. I need to find a hobby.
post #22 of 440

Newbie

Hello all. First time poster... I am a bit stressed here in Virginia. My wife and I have been doing our best to get registered for at home insemination with the big giant sperm bank here in VA., but cant seem to find anyone to fill out our paperwork! We first went to our primary care physician who said that they couldn’t sign the papers, but referred us to a OB/GYN. The ob/gyn did some preliminary blood work, but said she couldn’t sign the papers because she was not a fertility specialist. I just contacted a local fertility specialist who said she could not help us with at home insemination, but could work with us in the office. Is at home insemination illegal in Virginia, or am I barking up the wrong tree here? The paperwork is supposed to be the easy part, right?
post #23 of 440
Welcome Jiffyjo. I gew up in Fredericksburg.

Not sure about laws related to home insemination in Virginia. I know you can't do a second parent adoption there, but that's all I know. Good luck in getting the paperwork you need done.
post #24 of 440
Welcome, Jiffyjo! Sorry for all the run-around you're getting. : Maybe try with a midwife? I've been lucky in that I found a bank that would allow a midwife to sign the paperwork for us for home shipment of the sperm. With another bank that needed a physician's signature, my PCP had no trouble signing off on it. It kind of depends on the bank though. Some will only allow physicians to sign, and others are a little more lenient. Sounds like your doctors are being a little ridiculous...
post #25 of 440
And not every bank will allow home delivery. The two we are familiar with is Xytex and Midwest. Xytex has a great site and catalog. They have known donors if that is important to you and nice profiles including childhood and adult photos for most donors. They are very expensive though. But they allow our midwife to sign for the home deliveries. Midwest requires a doctor's signature but as quasar said, our PCP signed off no problem. I think she is highly amused by the fact that she is helping lesbians get pregnant. If you are just looking for ICI unwashed samples then a PCP or regular OB/GYN should have no problem signing off on that. If you were looking to try IUI at home, most doctors probably won't go for that. Sometimes you have to explain it to them. Our PCP was confused at first how we could do it ourselves at home. When I explained to her you just put it deep in the vagina with a syringe instead of a penis, the light seemed to go on over her head.

Sorry you are having such problems. Sorry for the long rambling post. I would keep trying doctors and ask your friends if they know any queer doctors. They probably would be more understanding and helpful.
post #26 of 440
shhhhhhhh..........................











CD1 here. (that's for Katie, just to be clear)



more soon, but we're sneaking back onto this thread. quietly. unobtrusively. in a not running our entire life way. hopefully.
post #27 of 440
Thread Starter 
Welcome back Meg & Katie!
post #28 of 440
Thread Starter 
Jiffyjo!

Sorry you're having such a hard time already! I just had my PCP sign the paperwork and it was just fine with our bank. Is there any way you can look for a new provider that is okay with it?
post #29 of 440
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jiffyjo View Post
Hello all. First time poster... I am a bit stressed here in Virginia. My wife and I have been doing our best to get registered for at home insemination with the big giant sperm bank here in VA., but cant seem to find anyone to fill out our paperwork! We first went to our primary care physician who said that they couldn’t sign the papers, but referred us to a OB/GYN. The ob/gyn did some preliminary blood work, but said she couldn’t sign the papers because she was not a fertility specialist. I just contacted a local fertility specialist who said she could not help us with at home insemination, but could work with us in the office. Is at home insemination illegal in Virginia, or am I barking up the wrong tree here? The paperwork is supposed to be the easy part, right?
Hi Jiffyjo --

I'm a homebirth midwife who does a lot of fertility work in Michigan, with women who have fertile male partners and women who don't. I have helped a lot of women get set up with sperm banks and found that they do fall into a few distinct groups:

first of all, some allow home ship and some don't. If you can find a friendly midwife (CNM, or sometimes licensed CPM) or OB or other doctor who is willing to take shipment of the tank, then you can do home insem even if you can't get home ship. Two of my clients have had our local bank ship to offices and then picked up the tank for home insem. The local bank doesn't charge shipping, just a courier fee, so it is a lot cheaper for them to do it this way. The bank won't ship to their homes, though. Many of the banks that require a physician's signature don't do home ship, though some do.

Some banks (Pacific and Northwest come to mind) don't require a health care provider and do home ship. Others (xytex, fairfax, california cryo, sperm bank of california, midwest) will work with licensed midwives and do home ship. Xytex will work with an unlicensed midwife if they are convinced she does fertility work routinely. Many small local banks do not ship to the home.

Have you considered asking a homebirth midwife? They are licensed in VA now, which means that they can work with some of the banks listed above. Even if a homebirth midwife doesn't have experience inseminating, they can sometimes be helpful with some of these logistical hoops.

Good luck!
post #30 of 440
Welcome back megin and katie!!!! ::::

Oh... oops, I was supposed to be quiet.... Er..... Hi guys


And I can't believe smartycat wrote humpy hump as one of my fertility signs on my chart....
post #31 of 440
welcome jiffyjo. we had no problem having our ob/gyn sign the paperwork for midwest home delivery for both of us. she didn't even care the least bit.

i think it's time to do a little shopping for a new doctor.

but first, i would try explaining to them the exact process you intend to do (now rather you do what you say you are going to do is up to you) and hopefully that will ease their minds. have you asked them why they are refusing to sign? have you been their patient for awhile? have you talked about trying for children with them before? do they know that you are a lesbian?

i don't understand why any doctor would be apprehensive about it. you may need to find someone who has been through this process before. our ob/gyn has several single and lesbian patients - many of which have conceived using home inseminations! best of luck to you in the search.
post #32 of 440

Help!!!

It's 7am and I leave for vacation in 3 hours. I won't have internet access again till Sunday night and I need your opinions. . .

11dpo and I POAS this morning. I don't, Not see a second line. This ghost line appeared in about 30 seconds, is very thin, and faint, but not so faint that I have to turnit in the light to see it. It's so thin that I can't tell if it has any pink color to it, or is just gray. I've had this happen once before, but the line didn't appear until 10 minutes after peeing - and of course that line meant nothing. I would take a picture, but I don't think it would show up. My temps have dropped 2 days in a row now, so I'm not hopeful.

It's an equate test. Are they natorious for evaporation lines?

What do you think?
post #33 of 440
I think if I were there I'd be standing at the door of CVS or Walgreen's waiting for them to open so I can buy you some more tests, pranava.
post #34 of 440
Quote:
Originally Posted by pranava View Post
It's 7am and I leave for vacation in 3 hours. I won't have internet access again till Sunday night and I need your opinions. . .

11dpo and I POAS this morning. I don't, Not see a second line. This ghost line appeared in about 30 seconds, is very thin, and faint, but not so faint that I have to turnit in the light to see it. It's so thin that I can't tell if it has any pink color to it, or is just gray. I've had this happen once before, but the line didn't appear until 10 minutes after peeing - and of course that line meant nothing. I would take a picture, but I don't think it would show up. My temps have dropped 2 days in a row now, so I'm not hopeful.

It's an equate test. Are they natorious for evaporation lines?

What do you think?

Oh! Get to the store now and then back here to post. Please! Hurry, hurry!
post #35 of 440
jiffyjo -

Quote:
Originally Posted by quasar View Post
And I can't believe smartycat wrote humpy hump as one of my fertility signs on my chart....
:

Quote:
Originally Posted by pranava View Post
It's an equate test. Are they natorious for evaporation lines?

What do you think?
I think I'd be running my butt to the drug store for a different brand possibly a digital! Pran, sending lots and lots of your way. Maybe the downward temps are implantation and that's why the line is so faint. Man, now we're going to have to wait till Sunday to find out. That's just mean, Pran, mean I tell you!

I had a pretty big drop today (9dpo) I've never been known to have "implant" dips so this is new. I've been anaylizing the hell out of my chart and the only thing I can think of now is that it is indeed a late implant dip and I'm praying for my temp tomorrow to rise. Or because this is such a long cycle and I O'ed a week late it could shorten my LP and AF should be coming tomorrow (early). I'm having cramps, sore boobs but those are easily explained. I'm so trying to stay calm but it's not really working. So any baby dust, positive words of encouragement, calming energy or relaxation techniques you might be able to provide today would be much appreciated!
post #36 of 440
I tried to take a picture, but all I have is my crappy phone camera. If I hadn't had a faint line before only to see AF later that day, I would definitely think this is a +. I guess it's just wait and see. By the time I get back I will either have AF or BFP!

Good luck to everyone in the TWW!

Got to go!
post #37 of 440
Posted the details in a separate thread, but I'm back here.

I'm not sure what category I'm in...not waiting to O, not in a 2WW, not stimming, but am being poked and prodded. Waiting to transfer? Otherwise, please put me in the poked and prodded category, for lack of something even more specific.

Its good to be back, and see some familiar faces, although I wish those faces weren't still trying.
post #38 of 440
Hi all! Happy July to you all!

It's awesome to see that we got a few BFPs last month! Good luck to all who are going to be trying this month, no matter where you are in you cycle.

I'm currently sitting at CD9, but we're not insemming this month. We are going to be giving it the old college try next cycle, however. I'm getting a little giddy thinking that for the first time ever I'll get to ask the thread keeper to move me to "Waiting to O" this month. We'll be going the low-tech route: no temping, no OPKs, no nothing. Just insemming based on cycle days, like we did when we got pregnant with E.

I'm so much more nervous about it this time. Everyone expects us to get knocked up right away this time too, since we got pregnant on our first try last time. I'm not liking the pressure of it all.
post #39 of 440
pranava - oh the suspense is gonna kill me! Fingers crossed for you!

Waiting to O drives me crazier than the TWW. I took my last dose of clomid last night and will start opk-ing soon. Next week is my last week home before two-weeks of work travel. My boss will be away and my schedule is pretty clear - so the week is mine for the ovulating!
post #40 of 440
Quote:
Originally Posted by DM630 View Post
Just checking in... It has only been 2 1/2 weeks that we have been on a break and I don't know what to do with myself. In the past, although the attempts were unsuccessful at least we were trying, now I feel that opportunities are passing me by. basically because I think that I o'd this weekend. I can't help but thinking what if that was the egg and I missed it. I am just whining I know. I need to find a hobby.
i just want to say that i wish you strength throught this time. i know it's easy to think about all the opportunities that are passing you by, but also think how sometimes, our body needs a rest. hell, our minds need a rest too! ttc is very very stressful.

i'm not sure if you are a crafty person or not, but making a scarf or something has always preoccupied my time. also reading books at the bookstore or library. just something to get out and about. try not to stay in the house too much! oh, and do all the "bad" things. have a few drinks, each sushi, go to starbucks. i'm sure every woman in here would envy you for your ability to do at least one of those things!!
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