Sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time right now in your relationship. It is very emotionally draining and exhausting to deal with such issues.
It is really hard for me to give any thoughts/advice about your situation, because you are very vague about the details. Which, I COMPLETELY understand!
One thing that did strike me about your post was:
1. What does "happily ever after" mean to you? Marriage? Living together? Verbal, life-long committment? Do you not consider the time you currently put into your relationship as starting the "happily ever after"?
I found that I really had to re-think my definitions of marriage, "happily ever after," commitment, love and relationships after my divorce.
Give yourself some time to sit and sort through all of these feelings. Really look deeply and honestly at the why of each question. Try to take your boyfriend out the equation and just focus on YOU.
It is hard... very, very hard. I have recently had my own "moments" with my bf too.
Hang in there and be good to yourself.