February mamas, it's July! - Page 19

[lincap]

Dea- interesting article! Wish I read that when DS1 was little.. puts a new perspective on "baby" food!

Operamommy - Harry likes sucking on his feet too! Probably learned it from me.. I kiss and "eat" his feet all the time! Glad to hear your weekend went well with the big kids!

Flapjack - Congrats to Stephen! And love the story

Jezzy- glad you are feeling better!

applecore- HUGS to your aunt. Good thoughts on the digestive track.. I never thought of it like that at all!

Lovetobemama- Heat index of 105!!!!!!! YIKES! 80 and rainy today.. and I am cooking chicken on the grille... idiot!

cwoodard- don't worry about using some premade food! read labels and avoid the ones with rice flour or tapioca/starch as fillers.. IMHO I rather just the veggies or fruit!

Sarah- more hugs for your mom. Really hope she does better. Keep us posted.

mommy2abigail- CRAWLING! HOLY MOLY! I am freaking out here!

Justmama- good to see you here again! Gracie is adorable!!


Glad you all enjoyed my rare bacteria story. My gastro dr asked me to ask in laws for stool samples for analysis but they declined. Now when FIL gets out ot the bathroom he says "just washed my hands, didn't dry them so you saw they are still wet!".. NASTY man .. just bad personal hygiene for both MIL and FIL... yuk.. shudder...

Back to my grille!

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by lovetobemama

Jezzy, and everyone with IL issues (I know lots of us have had things come up from time to time), just wanted to send . It sounds like a really rough road to travel. And i wanted to throw in another point: IMO, mothers of young children have been fighting this fight with the mothers of the previous generation for pretty much all history! This is not in any way to undermine the fact that, as the mom, WE hold the full rights and responsibilities to our children, NOT the grandparents, though we ideally share them with a partner like Helen mentioned. But I just wanted to suggest that, while we must protect our children from misguided and often uneducated IL's, I think it is possible that some day, years from now when more of us than just Teeny are also grandparents, that we might have more compassion for these misinformed grandparents who make poor decisions.

You know... I'm going to have to disagree with you on this, but only a little. The way i see it, entirely too many folks in the older generation see it as an indictment of their actions when someone behaves differently. Sometimes that's the case, but usually it just has to do with better information. My mother was astonished when I told her that I did not intend to wean BeanBean just because I was pregnant with BooBah, nor did I intend to wean him when she was born. "People nurse twins and even triplets; I'll certainly have enough milk for both of them." She wasn't angry about it, nor was she defensive about the fact that she had weaned one of my sisters when the next was born (said sister was like BeanBean and refused to give up the boob even though there was no milk). "When you know better, you do better," she said. (That's a Maya Angelou quote, I believe, and it's so very very true.) My MIL said the same thing about breastfeeding; She was quite surprised that there were still people who had negative things to say about it in this day and age. "When I did it, you were either a bottle user or you were Amish, but today everyone knows how much better it is. I can't believe anyone could possibly be against it, with all the information we have."

I will *never* be that grandparent. I'm all in favor of evidence and thought. If I think that my grandchild is in danger, I'll sure as heck speak up... but if my DIL can explain why they're doing X, and I don't see an immediate danger (or even a long-term one), then why is it my place to interfere? When you know better, you do better. So no, I can't be compassionate twoard ILs who are invasive, disrespectful, and thoughtless in any context. I'll be entirely honest and say that my ILs are not the brightest crayons in the box, and go a step further to say that their behavior with regard to religion is disrespectful at best... but they're good people in general, and they do try, for the most part.

Eilonwy: The IL's and their food...sounds absolutely crazy!! BTW, I, too, have been meaning to pop over the religious studies, Hopefully the kids will sleep well and i will get there tonight!

Yeah.. it's odd, but like I said my odd requests don't even register as noteworthy blips on their radar. And go for it-- the thread's pretty quiet at the moment (I think I scared everyone :sheepish).

As for us, Molly is doing well. Almost 16 pounds now!! Crazy. She will be 5 mos in a couple of days, and I can't believe how fast the time is going

Bear has an ear infection; he weighed 16 pounds and 3 oz at his appointment. He's also about 28.5" tall. So astonishing to me... Bella was definately closer to a year old when she weighed 16 pounds.

Linda-- Wow, I found your story grimly fascinating. I'm not one to rubberneck at car accident scenes, but sometimes you just can't avert your eyes from yuck, and my weakness is for text. I know all about yucky bacteria... but mine was obscenely common (if it's relatively rare for people to get sick from it ). So disturbing... I can't imagine having the poops for over a month. That was one of the bacteria they tested for when Bear was puking & pooping blood, though. UGH.

The food allergies... I can understand why you feel like people just don't want to be bothered, but it can get really really hard. With something like this, I'd probably think of it as anything else-- the period of your life when you're doing all the work will be relatively short. I saw a show on Discovery Health once about some girls who had a very rare skin condition which necessitated constant treatment & intervention. There were two families, one in which the woman had had two children relatively close together, and another in which they had decided to wait until the first child was able to participate in her skincare regimen to a fair extent (the disorder was one of those autonomic recessives, so the couples each had a 25% chance of having a child with the disorder each pregancy). The first woman had kind of been overworked (I say "kind of" because she survived and didn't go *completely* insane, but she was clearly stretched out doing all that work 24/7) for the first seven or eight years; The second did a lot, but she was much more relaxed about things (I think she had waited until her older child was 8 or 9). I gues s my point is.. in a few more years, you'll be able to relax again and rejoin society in a lot of ways. In the meantime...

[Mama2-4]

Hello Mama's, I have to admit I have fallen behind in my posting so now I will try to play a little game of catch up!

I was so bummed tonight, I was wearing my lovely birthing bead necklace and also wearing my lovely baby...well she was having a great time pulling on it and it all came loose. Luckily I got it off before it fell apart. So, I have spent the last 45 minutes restringing it. I feel like I messed with Karma by taking the beads out of order. There was so much enery in it, I did wear it during my labor and birth and have worn it as much as I can since. I am happy that it is all put back together and hopefully in pretty much the same order, I just hope it doesn't happen again.


[B]Linda[B] What a story girl! Icko, I would not want those hands touching my babies! I can not believe they save cheese that long! Imagine what else could be in that freezer of theirs! I can safely say I would not eat any food that they prepared!!!

Glad you are back from vacation, I was not able to get the facebook link to work so could not view your pictures....

Helen Many congrats to you and DH! What a wonderful feeling to be done with school! Loved the story of the banana! This is icky,and I should not even be telling this story, but it brought back a memory of the day our ds2was crawling around the house, DH and I were busy but kept checking on him...the next thing we notice is he had brown drool coming out of his mouth...well our old cat would occasionally drop a little poopie out and low and behold Eddie got it and put it in his mouth!!! Gross, gross, gross!!! He lived, and all was fine, but it was just icky! I know nothing like a banana, but for some reason your story jogged that memory!

JustmamaOMG, your little Gracie is so darn cute!! Sounds like she is thriving!


SarahSo sorry about your Mom, how scary...I have been thinking of you and of her and glad to hear things are on the mend.

I can't believe all the little one's trying their first taste of solids! Audrey has really only had sips of water...she loves to grab my water glass out of my hand. I am so not ready to start her on solids! Our babies are growing up way too quickly!!

Applecore I hope your Aunt is okay, and your family will come to terms with her anorexia...how sad.

DeaThanks for the article...I have it saved to read a little later.

SharunI am sorry for your MIL's behavior. I agree that I would be wearing Ashlee anytime she is around...it is so wrong that she would turn her back on you while holding your baby...errrrr!! I don't think I would want her near my baby! I am glad that you are working things out with DH, but it stinks that he was not more supportive towards you in that situation.

Oh, and I loved the video of Ash crawling!! I watched it with Audrey in my lap, she was very attentive to the whole thing and after I put her down on the ground and she was trying to do exactaly what she saw Ashlee doing!!

Lovetobemama I hear you on the heat...it has been brutal here too! At least Molly went for something refreshing like watermelon on a hot summer day!

JuiseI concur, that felt board is sooo cool!!! I think I am going to try to make one with my boys. They would love a pirate or castle themed one! I am not sure I am as talented as you, but we are going to give it a whirl!

Amyloved your video! How awesome that you were able to be included in such a project! I watched most of the segments and it was really well done!

cwoodardHope that you have a nice visit with your Mom and are able to get some rest while she is there, take advantage of it!

Other news from me...I applied for a part time job working nights in labor and delivery. I have not heard anything yet, but am hoping for an interview in the next week or so. After some calculating we figured if I work part time night shift (7p-7a) we will not need daycare and I get paid extra for nights, so it ends up being only about $200 less than working full time days. This way I will not have to go through the agony of putting my little people in daycare!

Audrey is not crawling yet, she gets up on all fours and does a little rock back and fourth...she does not sit up yet either, but I did invest in a bumbo seat and she is having a great time sitting up and playing with her rattles.

Be back later....LO wants to nurse!

[Mama2-4]

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These are a few recent pictures of my kidos!

[firecat]

Oh my Andrea your kids are Adorable!! and my dh's name is Jeff too good luck on your job-hunting - I am going to have to start looking into daycare/going back to work here soon...not looking forward to it.

Linda, what a wild story!

Operamommy/linda, Jackson loves sucking on his toes too. He recently found his little man parts so he is always trying to grab them while he's peeing!! So funny but messy...

Jezzy, so sorry to hear about your problems... I don't know what I would do.

Justmama, Hi!! good to hear from you grace sounds so sweet, glad she is letting you get some sleep.

sarah and applecore... healing to you and your families!

I know there are many of you I missed...please don't take it personally

food: Jackson hasn't had any food yet. I am putting it off as long as possible...for purely selfish reasons AF hasn't showed up yet and, well, I'd like it to stay that way for as long as possible. He isn't really interested yet anyway. He watches us eat but is happy enough to play with his toys (his fav is the strap from the highchair

teething: Dh informed me today Jackson's getting a tooth, and sure enough he has a white bump on his upper gum! It doesn't seem to bother him too much yet, he does love those frozen toys though.

Crawling: I can't believe some of us have such mobile babies!!! (why is there not a crawling baby smilie? it would be too much fun!) Jackson is doing his scooching and rolling and is starting to sit unsupported for small amounts of time. Not crawling yet...

I got back from my art show today. It actually went fairly well. I did about the same $$ wise that I did last year at that show so while I am happy about that, I am disappointed that my sales did not grow.
Jackson had a blast hanging with his daddy a lot, I think it was a good bonding time for them. We (mainly me since I am the one with the control issues ) are slowly learning the fine art of The Tag-Team so dh is getting better at taking care of Jackson and I am getting some more me time.

I think a lot about having another but I know it's too soon for Jackson. And for our wallets . It was such a big hurdle for me to get to one (mentally and emotionally), #2 seems rather natural. Part of it is the praise I seem to get from many people...I am pretty lucky with sweet comments about what I am doing (babywearing mainly) but anyway.

[eilonwy]

Ah, having another one. I am glad that my babymaking days are done. :

I got a lot of sweet comments too. BeanBean was ubersocial, so whenever he was out in public he was an absolute dream as long as people talked to him (and who didn't want to talk to him? He was beautiful and happy!). BooBah was quite mellow when she was slingable; I had more than one person tell me that if they knew they'd get one like her, they'd totally have anohter baby. :

The nice comments are good. They let you feel like you're doing something right, rather than screwing up all the time. But yeesh... I so won't have anohther one, even though I often get compliments in public for not strangling anyone (or even for braving the supermarket with four kids alone... regardless of my snippiness or the lack thereof. ).

[Jezzy]

Thanks ladies I am feeling better. I am glad that I talked to dh about this and glad that i didnt just let it slide again. i am also glad that he listend!

I agree with rynna about the older generation and.... i have already given my kids permission to shoot me if i ever turn into a disrespectful grandma.


Mama2-4 great pics!!


firecat glad that the show went good for you!!

eilonwy I think that my baby making days are done too. I was thinking of another one but I can only imagine that things would get worse. I think I would have double the trouble with mil especially if i had a boy. (she made it known that she was dissapointed that ashlee was a girl) A boy to be forced to take over the carpentry buisness would have been much better!

[flapjack]

Firecat, I'm glad the show went well

We've had a few quiet days here with my mum down. Will update with pictures later today, I promise. Hugs to all :

[Jezzy]

cwoodard just got the post card from you! Thank you Cynthia!

Helen, can't wait to see the pictures1

[sarahn4639]

i will read and catch up on everything tonight. just a quick update here. they found a hole in my mom's heart. it's actually rather lucky that she had this rather minor heart attack because these holes are usually only detected in autopsy after the major heart attack or stroke. So she's in surgery as we speak having that repaired. She also had to have a blood transfusion last night due to very low hemocrit levels (amemia). i really and truely appreciate all your thoughts and prayers and everything. i know none of you know anything about my mom but this is a huge part of my life right now and i really appreciate that you care. it's kind of wierd but i do love you guys!

[firecat]

yeah, jackson is super social too. Very aware, and happy. After an experience like yours Rynna I might be done too, and besides, 4 is such a nice round number .

one lady told me I should be one of those people who has lots and lots of kids. : um, no. I know for some people it's great but for me Jackson is plenty right now. I only want one in diapers at a time thankyouverymuch

thanks jezzy and flapjack... It is a slow journey to actually make any real $$ but it is a lot of fun. My goal right now is to make $1,000 a month (wages not sales), I'm at about $300 now but it's a process, right?

and, can't wait to see your pics! I need to post some new ones too, I guess.

sarah, I am so glad they found and are able to fix your mothers heart problem.

[lovetobemama]

Yikes Sarah! I hope the surgery goes perfectly and your mom is feeling well again SOON!
Thinking of you and her today!

[Mama2-4]

Sarah, just wanted you to know I am thinking of your Mom today. Keep us posted. s:

[Jezzy]

Thinking of your mom too Sarah! My thoughts are with you!

[flapjack]

Gentle healing vibes from here as well : And lashings of rescue remedy for the rest of the family, naturally.
Cheryl, have you considered selling on etsy? My ceramicist bellydancing teacher just joined, and she's selling a certain amount.

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by firecat

yeah, jackson is super social too. Very aware, and happy. After an experience like yours Rynna I might be done too, and besides, 4 is such a nice round number .

: Me likey de balancy.

one lady told me I should be one of those people who has lots and lots of kids. : um, no. I know for some people it's great but for me Jackson is plenty right now. I only want one in diapers at a time thankyouverymuch

Here's a fun fact for you: Despite the fact that all of my kids have been crammed together (19.5/21/22 month spaces, respectively) this is the first time that I've had two kids in diapers for more than 2.5 months.

thanks jezzy and flapjack... It is a slow journey to actually make any real $$ but it is a lot of fun. My goal right now is to make $1,000 a month (wages not sales), I'm at about $300 now but it's a process, right?

sarah, I am so glad they found and are able to fix your mothers heart problem.

: :

[firecat]

re: etsy::: I have thought about it. I may try it for the holiday season this year. There is so much I could be doing but... well you know how it is with a baby

[Selesai]

Hi, I'm a lurker, though I missed out on the first nine pages of this month. Right now I just need some support. DH took DD to the ped (CNP) for her checkup. She had a respiratory illness a few weeks ago at her 4 mo checkup so this was a follow-up. Because she is now healthy (aside from some nasal congestion) they gave her her 4 mo shots. Apparently she took it like a champ. But now she is CRYING CRYING CRYING. DH gave her some Tylenol which will hopefully help. DD is very laid back, this type of crying is not normal for her. I am sure DH will have a tough afternoon considering he's trying to watch DS (busy busy toddler) too.
I'm obviously really upset that I'm here at work and cannot be there to comfort DD. But mostly I am reminded that I have never really made up my mind about vaccinations. I will admit that I am a bad parent. I am a bad parent because I am lazy. I do not /cannot take the time to exhaustibly research vaccines, even though my children's health is obviously at risk. (Like I said. Bad parent.)
I think out-of-the-ordinary crying is an unacceptable effect. But if DD DID get a vaccine-"preventable" disease, she would cry and be uncomfortable then, too. What am I saving her?

Obviously this is a very complicated topic. DS is not fully vaccinated only becasue I put off the MMR/Varicella so far.

I don't know what to do. Isn't there a magic answer?

[eilonwy]

Please don't be so hard on yourself; there could be abny number of reasons your baby is crying inconsolably. Perhaps it's as simple as wanting a nursie.

[ema-adama]

Hi all,
So I know that there are others here with rather strained relationships with their IL's, and I have my woes to vent now!

I am getting to the point where I am fantasizing about just moving far away from them... one set are arrogant rather impersonal doctors who are not supporting any of my health decisions for myself or my LO as they are not in line with their beliefs. On the other hand I have a 2nd set of IL's who are just freaking me out with smoking around my LO, and fantasizing about watching TV with him, feeding him crap and just generally doing things that I find rather offensive... and here I was fantasizing about bringing my family up with grandparents close by and a sense of family.... my parents moved far away from all family as they were the odd ones out and I always wished that I had had family around - now I think they might have been onto something.

Basically tonight was just another night in the sense that I got an email with a link to a newspaper article from MIL extolling the virtues of vax, when I have yet to give a vax and am not at all sure DS will get any. I take issue with this as there has been a huge blow up with the other IL's on this issue (I was insulted by having my intelligence questioned and basically told that I do not have the tools to decide - by doctors that so not even know that MMR is not given before one year - but that is a whole other rant) Anyway, MIL was my main source of support as I went through quite a rough time trying to figure out how to deal with such obnoxious people (FIL and his wife)... and now she has started to contradict me on whatever I say and it has gotten to the point where I just don't want to be around her or her chimney smoking husband even though I have had a really good relationship with them up till the birth of DS... another thing that really gets to me is that when we do go around, she wants to be with DS and will take him and then plug him with a paci - something that I have only been wanting to use when he 'asks' for it. And then she wants to get a paci ribbon so that it can't fall and he will always have it clipped to him and I find the idea rather strange - and unappealing! If not plugging him with a paci, she is plying him with some toy... in my experience with him he is far more interested in people and watching their facial expressions and talking to them... but she just doesn't get it.

I know that it boils down to a difference in approach... she has 3 boys who all sit on the computer/ watch TV a minimum of 12 hours a day (work and play), and one who at 20 years old never leaves his room as he is or sleeping or on the computer playing (he stopped school when he switched day and night and couldn't wake up in the mornings)and this bugs me. It just does not feel right.

And she also is a career mum who had the kids on formula and in day care ASAP and bought them every gadget that has been invented and was proud to do so. So, she just does not get me when I choose not to have flashing lights and whizzing pinging toys around DS... even could go so far as to say she suspects that I am depriving him

ARGH!!! I know these are really small issues compared to what it could be, but I have had it with IL's (and my parents, but they are half the world away) criticizing my choices as a parent... and presuming they know better when the extol CIO and infant day care and formula and G*d knows what else that is not in line with my way of thinking.

So, poor DH feels like he is stuck in the middle and I really wish he didn't. He is a peace maker/keeper and really gets upset when people he loves fight. But I really do think that people (IL's) should be respectful of my choices and preferences - I just right now see a long road ahead of me having to repeat again and again my requests to please respect my choices and it's rather crappy!

So, sobbing over... gotta catch some sleep now while Hillel sleeps

Still writing my cards - but getting there slowly

Peace to all