Ds (3) is pushing around dd (10months). What do I do?

[a(TM)?Star]

Ds is getting a little rough with dd. He's doing it when he's mad, so I know is not just general roughness. We tired explaining to him that pushing her down isn't how you treat people, and he can hurt her little body, but he continues to do it. I'm on the verge of screaming, please give me some suggestions!!!!!


Also- I do realise that she's at an age where she's starting to take toys, play with his stuff etc, where as she never did this, so he's having trouble accepting her being around and functioning more as a toddler, and not a baby.

[a(TM)?Star]

Helooooo? Anyone? He did it again this morning!

[kacymoose]

It is so hard when an older child hurts the baby. We feel so protective of our babies, and so it is easy to feel a lot of anger toward the older child. I believe it is important to look past the anger, and identify with the reason he is pushing. You mentioned the baby is starting to get into his toys and he was angry when he pushed her down. If the baby is injured by this, I would comfort her first. Ask him if there is anything he can do to help her feel better. Once baby is okay, talk with him and validate his feelings of anger. Show him some better coping techniques if he is receptive.

IME, getting angry and punishing for this type of sibling interaction did nothing but increase how often it happened.

[Maggirayne]

I am subbing. I babysit for an AP mom and her 3 yo pushes my DD, 14 mo. He's rough w/his little brother too. I do stuff with him, and he's okay then, but he's not the only one so I can't always focus on him.

He jerks toys out their hands and will not hurt them, but poke with a toy or but his feet on them but just not kick.

It is so annoying! I get angry, and we(his parents and I) send him to his room).

He does it sometimes when she takes something from him, but it is not really predictable.

I have modeled and walked him through, "Baby has your toy, come tell me," "What do you do?" "Okay, I'm coming and _____(intervening)." Which he seems to understand, but doesn't do. And because it is random, he'll race by and grab a toy out of their hands or yesterday, he threw a (heavy)toy and just missed
my DD, and I have no idea why. All of us are at wit's ends.

Okay, I'm just going to post my own thread, sorry to hijack.