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Cesarean support circle IV (October 16- ) - Page 3

post #41 of 123
Thread Starter 
It's all good, though-in the face of adversity we're given an opportunity to validate ourselves.
post #42 of 123
But why do we have to validate ourselves??

I don't really want/need an answer to that. Just venting I guess and I haven't even had a c/s yet:
post #43 of 123
A big hug to all of you who have had to deal with rude PM's. I
haven't received any myself....maybe I just give off strong "Don't
f___ with@me" vibes. I'm just sooooo tired of being judged that I have no patience whatsoever.
I have not posted my birth story (except here where it might do some good, and in the
"October mamas" thread, briefly) and I am not going to.
My response to anyone who wants to know why I've had 2 cesarians is a terse, "Because it was necessary." Unless it's someone who could really benefit from the information, I don't get into the details because it's none of their damn business.

My recovery the second time around has been sooooo easy!
I can't believe Skye is three weeks old already. I am more or less back to normal. It's awesome. I just didn't stress this time (and
didn't torture myself with 34 hours of contractions before agreeing to have a cesarian) and am really doing great both physcally and mentally.
It helps that DD actually sleeps too, unlike her big bro.

Rock on Mamas.
post #44 of 123
Thread Starter 
True, SMPH-I wasn't implying that we need to validate ourselves *to* anyone, I was referring to an internalized validation. My personal experience was that I did need to do some of that (being the latent uberachiever that I am,) and I know others who have felt the same. And this isn't being said to answer your question, but to be more precise for myself .

Glad you're feeling well, Hikaru! Rock on, indeed!
post #45 of 123
This past week, I've heard about the births of two friends of mine. Both C. It got me thinking... I think that in the last year, everyone I know who has given birth (except one woman) has had a C. One or two of them I think may have been suckered into it by their drs (hate to describe it that way, but it's kind of the way I feel), but the rest were really working at having unmedicated V births (including homebirth). Maybe it's just because I've had a C that they're more willing to talk to me about it, or that I'm more aware of what's happening with others. But boy, it just seems from my perspective like *everyone* is having one, and I don't like it.
post #46 of 123
Thread Starter 
Bumping up the thread.

And just wanted to quickly say how much my second birth is healing me from my first. I'm so grateful!
post #47 of 123
Gotcha ladylee

Quote:
I do energy work, and I surrounded them with loving, protective energy throughout the whole birth. Anyone can do this.
I saw this in the "other" thread and wanted to know if you could elaborate on this.

Thanks,
Shannon
post #48 of 123
I think I've said this before and it might sound stupid but I think my c/b haas served a purpose.

Do you have any idea how many women I have had call me, email me, talk to me about my c/b experience? I get a chance to tell women that even though it isn't what you may want you can make it a great experience

Anyway, these women, with their never ending questions have helped me heal. I can give them an honest looka t what a lot of women are ashamed to talk about. Which is very sad. We should never feel ashamed or have to validate our birthing experience (kwim?)
post #49 of 123

rambling......

I'm already trying to figure out how I will respond to people who say "aw...you had to have a c-section...". Honestly I'm sure I've thought those same words in the past. It's surgery any way you look at it and who wants anyone to have surgery

I figure my child knows that head up is the best position for him to be in. Hopefully we'll know why.

I have a few questions for you experienced cesarean moms...if ya don't mind!

~~How did you make it personal?

~~How soon after did you BF?

~~How long did you stay in the hospital?

I'm sure there are more but the blood isn't quite making it to my brain at the moment...
post #50 of 123
How did I make it personal?-- I talked and asked questions of my anesthesiologist, ob, the nurses, and my dh. My dh explained and described EVERYTHING that happened. I even talked to my baby. We didn't know sex so dh even got to announce it! They offered to let dh cut the cord but he had no intention of doing it...he was a little nervous! When i came out of the OR my son was in my arms. I transported him everywhere; recovery and our room

How soon after did I BF? My son was bf'ed 45 minutes after birth. He latched on like a champ. He was very alert...I was a little drugged from the morphine though. I can still remember the nursing. (I have very few memories after about 5 hours after the c/b till about 1 day laterI'm not sure what they gave me but it really made me loopy)

How did I stay in the hospital? I was induced at am Friday April 26, Ds was born at 9:48pm, we went home Sunday Afternoon at 2. So, after delivery I was there for 40 hours. They said I was having no problems walking and I was in good spirits and I seemed to be healing quickly so there was no reason to stay unless I wanted to. So, i went home as soon as I had everything settled.
post #51 of 123
Thanks Megan.

I hadn't thought about how he would get from surgery to our room. Another question to add to my list! We asked so many questions last week at our appointment the doc said "I think you guys could do this c-section on you own!". Hey, I need to be informed here.
post #52 of 123
Thread Starter 
~~How did you make it personal?

I communicated my birth wishes to my doctor, just as I would have with a vaginal birth. I made sure I liked and trusted my doctor (I switched ob/gyns mid pregnancy because I didn't feel as comfortable with my first.) I called the anesthesiologist beforehand and spoke to him, just to make sure I liked him too. I needed to treat these people like they were sacred beings-considering the role they were playing in bringing my baby into the world. That really made it personal.

~~How soon after did you BF?

I was amazed at how quickly this happened. I thought I would have to fight to get my baby back, but she was latching on within twenty minutes after they were done stitching me up.

~~How long did you stay in the hospital?

Two days! I was thrilled! My first I stayed 3 days, and I had the option of staying as long as four this time. But I was feeling good enough to go home after two.

SMPH-good luck to you! About the energy thing-do you ever do visualizations? You can do whatever works for you-visualize the baby surrounded by protective white light, a pink cloud, whatever. You can send out the intention that the universe will keep her/him safe, etc. What I did was to ask the universe to surround Alena with all of the love from her family, both here and gone, and to keep her safe. You can take any birth visualization and modify it accordingly.
post #53 of 123
Quote:
Originally posted by ladylee
I thought I would have to fight to get my baby back, but she was latching on within twenty minutes after they were done stitching me up.
I was the same way. I was actualy kinda shocked at how long the whole thing took. from epidural to recovery took an hour but it felt like 10 minutes!

I agree...liking your anesthsiologist is a BIG plus! Mine was great...she calmed all of my fears!
post #54 of 123

SMPH,

Please check your private email on MDC. I sent you an email because it sounds like we are in the same boat. I am almost 38 weeks with a breech baby, and just scheduled a c-section for Nov. 19th. I was planning a homebirth, but that is not meant to be. There are some conditions that we just can't control, and they are best treated with a c-section. i have gotten a lot out of this thread, too. Thanks to everyone for all the great info. Peace.
post #55 of 123

Some of my tips on having a great cbirth

I am so glad to see this thread on the Mothering forums. What I really want to see, is an article in Mothering for those of us who do have to have csection births to make it more comfortable, "natural" and incorporate our attachment parenting beliefs. I had to DIG to get the information I needed to have the wonderful cb that I had with my last child.

BTW, I am not pregnant. lol but read the forums. My first CB was very traumatic, I felt the whole thing, and I thought I was going to die. It was necessary after a failed version. I had a transverse breech baby due to a uterine anomaly.

In my last pregnancy my son was head down but in a funky position. His shoulder was presenting against the cervix and his head was tilted the wrong way. I wasn't planning a VBAC but even if I had, I would have been a repeat. I am glad I "planned" my last birth and it was perfect in my eyes.

Now a lot of my crunchy friends wonder how I can say I had a wonderful great csection experience but I did and I would do it again! Some of the things I did for me to overcome the bad previous experience was meditation and birth affirmations. I had to overcome a lot of fears to go back into the OR but with a skilled, empathetic doctor I did. At times she thought my ideas about the birth were off the beaten path but she understood where I came from and respected my decisions.

I think anyone that knows they are going to have a csection should really investigate pain relief and anestesia (sp) for the surgery and after. I think moms to be need to know what kind of drugs are give preop and post o[ and make decisions accordingly. Most moms don't realize that sedatives are given before, during and after birth, and that some drugs given for nausea often can cause sleepiness and "hangovers" after your baby arrives.

For me I chose to have no pre-op drugs. I had a support person other than my husband. In fact my husband had little role when it came to me. I had my sister function as a doula (she was an ob nurse and childbirth educator) I chose to have an epidrual. I have many reasons for this. One was I had a spinal previously that caused me to be sick, didn't work and went to high into my chest. It did not offer pain relief after surgery. There is a small window with a spinal of pain relief. The epidural I got was great. I was still able to move my legs, I felt no pain but I did feel pushing and tugging the baby out of me. My blood pressure did drop and I was given ephedrine, this cleared up the nausea I had and stabilized my blood pressure. One of the reasons I chose the epidural was so I could have it for the next 12-24 hours for pain relief. It was administered right through my catheter into my back. It was a "walking epidural" and after the birth I could sit up, move around and even sat on the side of the bed with no discomfort. I wanted this type of pain relief vs the PCA pump, shots or demerol pills because I wanted to have a clear head and think clearly. I had this removed 17 hours post op. If I have any more babies, I will chose this method again. I could go into a lot of detail about how I came to chosing the epidural but this post is already getting lengthy!

The other things I did to ensure a great cbirth was that I requested to view my baby being born, see him after birth, and hold him on the table up on my chest. I was able to do all these things. My baby wasn't bathed, no goop in his eyes, though I did op for a vitamin K shot. I asked to see my placentat too! My baby was with me from surgery to recovery. My csection was 30 minutes long. Fifteen minutes after sewing me up I was nursing my baby and chatting on the telephone, pain free.

I also requested certain things in the surgery. I wanted people to talk to me. My last cbirth no one spoke to me and that scared me. This time everyone was talking and laughing. I felt at ease. My arms were not strapped down nor my legs. I also asked to be sewn up with stitches vs staples. This was a great improvement from the previous cbirth!

The only unexpected thing that happened was that while I was open on the table they had trouble dislodging my sons head. They could not manually get him out with their hands. So my doctor asked me what I preferred, forceps or vacuum. I chose vacuum over forceps. There was not even a mark on his head or any other place on his body and it took one try with the vacuum. I also ate immediately after he was born. No starvation! I left the hospital in under 48 hours. I could have left at 24 hours but my doctor was uneasy about letting me go home earlier. That was okay, it was nice to have another night alone with him before going home to a house full!

Kim
post #56 of 123
Kim

Thank you thank you thank you for your post! I really needed to hear that kind of thing right now, I am still 3 months away from my 3rd c-section, but I really need to know what I *can* control, and what choices I have. I really want to make this a wonderful birth, and hearing what others have done to have wonderful c-births really helps. I have one question for you- what pain meds did you use following the epidural? I have had problems with sleepiness in my babies with darvaset (sp?) in the past, and am thinking of trying ibuprofen this time, or any other suggestions, although the darvaset (sp?) did do wonders for the pain, much more than the morphine even, for me.

Thanks again for your very inspiring post, I really appreciate it!
post #57 of 123
Yes, thank you very much.

We are scheduled for our cesarean this Monday at 1 pm.
post #58 of 123
Lets see. After my epidural was removed I took demerol by mouth. I took a low dose to begin with instead of a higher dose to see how it made me and Jack feel. I had a script for 30 pills. I think I took ten the first week at home. Mostly at night or when I first got up in the morning. Other times I took Motrin or Extra Strength Tylenol.

With my last csection I had a fairly easy recovery. I was driving in a week, cooking, doing errands. With three kids its not like I could stop! My dad hired a maid for me for 6 weeks so that was really nice. I also had baby's 17 months apart. I think moving around helped the most. I also believe that being sewn up with stitched made a big difference in my recovery. My adhesions are not like they were (I had the onces from my first csection removed).

O and I also picked the time to have my csection. I think this was also key in having a good outcome FOR ME. I know that many people frown upon planning a csection and waiting until you go into labor is better, but emotionally it was better for me to to set everything up and have some control over the whole thing. If I had another head down baby I would most likely wait the next time for labor to begin but with a breech I wouldn't wait to go into labor (I have reasons for this) and just plan. I think the planning is a very personal thing and no would should be judged for doing a scheduled csection. I did not want to risk having my baby on a holiday, a weekend or at night. I wanted to know who my nurse was going to be (YES I interviewed and requested her!), I wanted to talk to the nursery staff, the anestisiologist (sp)( also requested) before I went to the OR. I had Jack at lunch time on a Friday. I had the same nurses for the entire two day stay and the same baby nurse. Also my pediatrician was able to be at the delivery because it was planned. My sister and husband were able to schedule time off too and I was able to arrange child care for my other children.

Please let me know if you want to know anything else!

Kim
post #59 of 123
Monday will be a great day to have a baby!!!

Let me give you some tips before you start your journey! LOL

Have your birth plan and your plan for your baby, if you have specific requests.

Get their early enough to request to speak to anyone you need to talk too.

If you care about how your outside incision is done, I strongly recommend stitched vs staples. It doesnt take them that much more time to do them.

Move around no matter how much it hurts. Take pain relief when needed. Breastfeed as soon as you can, even if you are in the twilight zone.

You will have gas. BAD gas. Just let it go honey. Let it go. Rocking will help get it moving out. This often causes more pain than anything after surgery. Some hospitals have rocking chairs in the rooms or nursery, if yours doesnt have one, request one! Rock in it and it will help move the gas out!

Take a Boppy Pillow with you. It is great for when you have to cough, nurse or have a bowel movement the first time.

Have them show you the baby as soon as he or she is born! Request to video and/or take pictures. This is something I was so glad I had.
My friend had to have an emergency csection and was knocked out. (footling breech with prolapse cord) She hates that she had nothing! When she woke up she didnt even know she had a baby.

Your husband CAN cut the cord. And I dont mean just trim it. Unless there is some type of problem your DH or SO can cut the cord, he just has to promise to keep the sterile field intact.

Don't let them put the cream in your babies eyes. No matter what they say, your baby is coming out a hole in your belly not the vagina so there is no concern about STDs or infections. I still dont get why they do this with csection babies!

If you feel nauseated at all, tell them right away so they can give you something. I recommend Zofran, but unless you ask before hand for this before they may give you phenegran which will make you loopy and sleepy.

If I think of anything else I will try to post before Monday AM. LOL

Kim
post #60 of 123
Thread Starter 
keeping the thread active

hope it went well smph!
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