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UC ruined by nosy neighbor *update #56, #74, #134, #160, #204, #219(long)* - Page 5

post #81 of 305
I am so sorry for this tragic turn of circumstances.

But I am glad that you are getting your baby back sooner than expected!

Congratulations on your baby's birth.
post #82 of 305
Well, in spite of the rough time you've had / are having, I don't think I ever saw your baby's name and birth stats so we could properly congratulate you!!

What is your DD's name? Was she a nice weight/length? Sound like she'll be coming home soon, so let's hear the happy stuff about your new darling!!

:

(sorry for what you've been through - awful!)
post #83 of 305
So sorry that your neighbour caused all this s**t for you. Wow....I think STERILE births must be a new thing....I mean my grandmother (who had children in the 30's and 40's) had all 11 of her children in her farm house....(and she wasn't a great housekeeper) and I had a home birth (not sterile).

HUGS to you!
post #84 of 305
so sorry for what you have been through! I totally understand how it's easy for other people on here to just say "go get her right now" but in my heart until I heard for sure what the law was i would be terrified they would try to take my child and put it in protective services or something. I truly don't think they can by law, but social workers who "mean well" have a habit or doing awful things at times... so I completely understand your caution.

that said I am SO happy for you that she is coming home today!!! I hope you are able to reach the right people to get this whole thing taken seriously and that the hospital owes you an apology.

by the way, hospital births are NOT "sterile births". who on earth quoted that to you? the only rooms that would be considered somewhat sterile are ORs and even they are not perfectly sterile b/c people come in bearing germs. do you know how many times i've seen surgeon's and OR nurses at the hospital where I work wearing their scrubs out for a smoke break or down to the cafeteria? yeah... and don't think they change those "sterile scrubs" and hairnets! don't for a second let anyone let you believe that the hospital is sterile or that it would hold up in court that a hospital is sterile. the only people who say this is to make a point. this isn't my weirdo wacky opinion - it's a simple fact.

but in time I pray you can put all of this behind you and remember the wonder of her birth and life. what a blessing a new baby is! please tell us more about her and her name or stats. new life should be celebrated! :
post #85 of 305
The hospital owes you a heck of a lot more than an apology. I am from this area and I do know the laws here. I know you will be glad to get your baby back in your arms, but I urge you to take legal action. Puerto Rico is a place of disorder thanks to a "system" that is slow to act and lazy to change. This place needs a swift kick in the #*$, but I guess they'd first have to get a leader that isn't corrupt. The main problem here is that no one is ever held accountable for their behaviors. My husband spends his days trying to get people who have committed SERIOUS crimes to be held accountable. You would be appalled to hear what people can get away with here in PR thanks to the "system". Crimes that the would be put away for life for committing elsewhere.

I feel so badly for you and what they have put you through. Please let me know if you need anything.
post #86 of 305
I've been following this thread, but really haven't had much to say other than

I'm so glad you were finally able to get somewhere with this. I'm so impressed with how you handled this nightmare. I sure hope you sue the pants off of them, but it takes a lot of energy to do that sort of thing. Definately file a complaint at least.

Now, get that baby home and enjoy things the way you were meant to!
post #87 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by milkydoula View Post
Mama, i hope you get your little one real soon and you can enjoy your babymoon and think back on her birth, before all this craziness started
Yeah, that, and then sue that hospital for all it's worth!
post #88 of 305
I hope that you are able to pick her up and babymoon in peace. T

Then, SUE the pants off of that hospital. SUE for everything they are worth.

post #89 of 305
i'm glad that your baby is home safe and sound!
post #90 of 305
I am so happy to hear your baby is coming home today, and I hope you have a very peaceful, wonderful weekend together. Congratulations on your new baby.

Be careful to look at what you sign when you leave just in case there's some weirdness in there about you not being able to sue.
post #91 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by KBecks View Post
I am so happy to hear your baby is coming home today, and I hope you have a very peaceful, wonderful weekend together. Congratulations on your new baby.

Be careful to look at what you sign when you leave just in case there's some weirdness in there about you not being able to sue.
: I really do second the idea of reading any forms that they ask you to sign very carefully. I wouldnt put it past them to have something about agreeing not to sue or somthing similar. I am soooo glad you will be getting dear baby home: Enjoy the babymoon
post #92 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by latinalonestar View Post
Btw, if she got staph it was probably from the hospital...
Yup. That's what I thought too.

I'm so sorry for all of this. I'm glad that it's almost all over. I cannot believe they did that. They had no right.
post #93 of 305
I feel really sorry for you...this is a terrible place to be in! However, I've got to address a few things here where you are making yourself out to be a powerless "victim" where you need to take power back. Also some places that I think you are being unreasonable.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Equuskia View Post
After that, a social worker arrived from emergency services. He told me he was there because someone had called about us. They thought we were having a domestic dispute and that since I was pregnant, my "screaming" was my dh hurting me. Never mind that my husband was talking normally to me during birth, and my screaming was clearing a pregnant woman giving birth. So now my husband is a wife beater. He went and talked to my husband, then went up to see the baby.
Most American women don't give birth at home (I have twice and am currently expecting my 3rd homebirth, so obviously I think it is a good thing...but reality here...), so why in the heck would you expect your neighbors to "clearly" know that your screams were from labor? What exactly would sound different about labor screams than domestic dispute screams--to an untrained ear? Try to be a bit patient here with the social workers--they are just doing their job!

Quote:
Afterwards, I find out that they are going to leave the baby in the NICU for FIVE days for an antibiotic treatment and tests and other bs.
So why are you consenting? Did they present any kind of a good case that your baby has an infection that needs such extreme treatment? You CAN check your baby out of the hospital "Against Medical Advice." If you plan to skip any vaccinations, you need to get used to the drill.

Quote:
So I'm supposed to pay a $1500 deposit for a hospitalization I never asked for plus whatever extra may come up, like my stay in the ER where I wasn't even examined by a doctor.
Ummm...yes, you did "ask" for the hospitalization by getting into the ambulance. You were under no obligation to get into an ambulance that you didn't call (or even one that you did call for that matter). If you hadn't gotten into the ambulance, you wouldn't even be obligated to pay for it, seeing as you hadn't been the one to make the call.

BTW...if your ambulance is a public service rather than a private company, you might not have to pay for that, it's covered by your taxes. In my area that is true in the "city," but the outlying "suburbs" are covered by private ambulance companies so residents would have to pay for ambulance services.

Quote:
This hospital is so incompetent, they don't even know how to fill out the papers for the b/c, since I gave birth at home and they don't know what to put in the information for me. I swear, you would think I'm the only woman to ever have given birth at home and walked into their hospital.
Again...try to be patient. They DON'T have homebirths coming to them a lot. It is a bit ridiculous that they don't know how to check off the box that says "at home" on the birth certificate form since its been on there since 2003...but try to be patient. You'll get better treatment from them if you treat them better.

I'm really not trying to be mean here...I hope that by helping you to think about these things a bit you will be able to offer a bit more slack to the people who just don't know what to do with people who birth outside of the mainstream. If you don't offer some slack, you are just going to make them keep fighting you.

Hugs!

Jenn
post #94 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by KBecks View Post
I would get all the test results of anything they have done and find out what they say about your baby's health, but I'm going to assume that everything is perfectly fine. If they have no proof that your baby is in immediate danger, you go in and get your baby. I would contact your pediatrician and have them back you up, you can follow up with your pediatrician at an office visit.

Good luck and hugs. You are in my thoughts.
YES! Get the test results. Be sweet as punch and ask to see the results of all lab work that has been done on your baby.

Actually, I'd also encourage you to watch to see if a nurse ever sets your baby's chart down somewhere that you can pick it up and look at it. You should request a copy of the chart ASAP--if you get any flack about them making a photocopy right in front of you (which they are allowed to bill you for--but I think you might need it--and you want to see them copy it to make sure any pages don't mysteriously get skipped), you need to contact a lawyer.

Hugs!

Jenn
post #95 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by Equuskia View Post
...the ped said I had no right to refuse her medical treatment, despite me claiming otherwise.
That is flat out a LIE. You are her legal guardian unless the court has appointed a new guardian. This is INSANE. Once you get your baby out I'd file a complaint with the hospital and with the state medical board about this pediatrician.
post #96 of 305
knitted in the wom,
would you stick to your guns even if it meant losing your own newborn baby to the custody of CPS. Somewhere on this thread, if I recall correctly, her husband or Eq stated that they were told either by her attorney or by the procurator that refusal of services would have led to them completely losing custody their new baby girl. Sometimes you have to cave and pick the lesser of two evils. What do you think a police officer would do if he was called to a home witha report of a woman screaming, neighbor called it in as DV, and then the hubby opens up the door and says, everything's fine, go away? You could even refuse consent of treatment and sign an AMA for the ambulance company and then count down the minutes until CPS is banging on your door. If you're lucky. Most likely the cop would bust down the door and take temporary guardianship of the baby on the spot. I think Eq's case has shpwn that the US and it's territories ingeneral do not support UC's and would have no qualms of accusing the mom of being unfit.
post #97 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by wytchywoman View Post
knitted in the wom,
would you stick to your guns even if it meant losing your own newborn baby to the custody of CPS. Somewhere on this thread, if I recall correctly, her husband or Eq stated that they were told either by her attorney or by the procurator that refusal of services would have led to them completely losing custody their new baby girl.
I read that after I made my post...seeing that obviously Puerto Rico is a different situation.

Obviously the MOM would need to be the one to shoo the police/EMS away in the US...because the police do need to do a reasonable job of investigating a complaint...which was part of what I was trying to get across--to stop being annoyed at people who are just doing their job. If your best friend were being beaten up by her significant other, you'd be Pi$%ed at the police if they *didn't* show up and verify that she was okay, but the OP here is Pi$%ed that they did. She's got a LOT to be rightfully angry about, but the police simply responding to a report of domestic violence (or really, even her neighbor making that call), is not one of those things.

I know that cases where kids are taken out of their home unnecessarily get a lot of press...but really, with our overworked social services system, the reverse is actually MUCH more likely to happen--kids that are being seriously abused DON'T get removed. I was one of them. Reports were made to social services at least 4 different times during the 11 years that my siblings and I endured abuse, and even the very last time where just two days after my father had hit me so hard that my glasses broke and I was left with a black & blue eye and a cut on my nose (a MILD example of the physical abuse we endured) my step-monster admitted to making a death threat with means/motive/opportunity, the social services worker said she did not have just cause to remove my sister and myself from the home. Fortunately the staff at my school took matters into their own hands, and provided an opportunity for my sister and me to move in with a teacher.
post #98 of 305
Our daughter has finally been released to us, and not before making my wife cry in rage once more. It seems social services still had to give the OK to release her, and they hadn't done it yet by 11AM. We didn't get that clearance until around 1PM, when we were speeding home with my wife in tears. Social services called us up and told us that she had been cleared for release. So, 180 on the road and back to the hospital to go through the tedious, largely-insignificant release process.

Social services has WAY too much power down here. Don't think for one second that just because it works one way in mainland USA that it works the same here.
post #99 of 305
I'm so glad you have your precious LO back safe now. This whole thing makes me

I do hope you're able to sue. At the very least, they should have to pay for the unnecessary "treatment" they forced on you.
post #100 of 305
Quote:
Originally Posted by KristyDi View Post
I do hope you're able to sue. At the very least, they should have to pay for the unnecessary "treatment" they forced on you.
Well, she was a ward of the state, and against our wishes and what we thought were our legal rights as parents. So, the state can pay for it.
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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Pregnancy and Birth › Birth and Beyond › Unassisted Childbirth › UC ruined by nosy neighbor *update #56, #74, #134, #160, #204, #219(long)*