Is 13 too young to get a nose piercing? - Page 5

[happyhats]

I had a nose piercing and let it close it, merely because I lost the ring (had to take it out for work) and I just decided that was okay. There was no scarring, no problems at all with it closing, and when I wore my small nose ring nobody really noticed the majority of the time.

That said, my mom did make me wait even though I wanted one for years. I don't know that I would necessarily wait until she was eighteen, but I would wait to see if it isn't just a passing fancy. I'd also discuss with her that it needs to heal properly, and that she may not be able to wear it in school or, later on, in most jobs. I'd probably get it done in the summer so it has time to heal and then be able to be taken out. Honestly I think I'd be more apprehensive about other piercing that might permenantly alter her appearance or take longer to heal.

[ananas]

I dunno, 13 seems really really young to me for something like that. Maybe it's just me though.

[caldo]

I said no because where I live it is against the law to do body piercing (i.e. other than ears) on anyone younger than 16 years of age. So anyone who would do it here would be breaking the law. That and I just feel 13 is a little young. She has her whole life to get a piercing if she chooses later...

That being said, it's up to you as the parent to judge if she is responsible enough to get a piercing. I just got my navel pierced and there is a LOT of care that goes into preventing infection. And infections can be really dangerous. You don't want to have to nag her about it.

[Twwly]

As a former piercer, my answer is no to the nose ring. In my experience, no reputable shop will pierce minors (hello 'penetration of a minor' charge... pass on that one).

(1) There can be permanent marks left behind in the form of keloid or hypertrophic scarring.

(2) I thoroughly disagree though that there is a lot of care that needs to take place, it's a small wound and your chances of infection are incredibly slim to none (unless your level of personal hygiene is WELL below average and you get pierced with a gun or something else that has not been sterilized in an autoclave). I cannot begin to count the number of noses I've pierced over the years and while I can certainly count the # of keloids I've seen, I've not seen one genuine infection.


As a parent I would be more worried about the chance of scarring than infection (which rates a 0 for me on the scale of worry). As a parent my answer would remain NO because no reputable shop would do it. DC would have to wait until whatever the age of consent is at whatever the cleanest shop in town is, period.

[tbone_kneegrabber]

I voted YES!!!! I had my eyebrow pierced at 14 and my first tattoo at 15 (both at reputable clean shops, with my mom's presence) and this was 11-12 years ago.

I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)

[Fyrestorm]

I chose other!

I know several 13 YOs that are more than capable of 'getting' what they are doing and several that would be doing it for all the wrong reasons. I think it totally depends on the child.

I have no problem at all with the concept of a 13 YO getting any type of body modification that they want...as long as they have a true understanding of what they are doing.

[jellybellyxoxo]

If you think she can take care of a nose piercing, then I'd say let her have it. In my opinion, it's not about how old she is (errr, it kind of is), but it's more about how mature she is. My almost-13 year old daughter could get a nose piercing any time under my rules because of her maturity level. So I find it more of a maturity level type thing, rather then age. (I voted other)

[KellyKA23]

I voted yes but I ment it to be a no! I think 13 is way too young, and i have nothing against nose peircings at all, but any sort of bodypeircings I am against untill 18. I think at 13 if they are alloud to do it, it was with your permission and same with the consequences. At 18 whatever you do to your body you are accountable for taking care of, and also conforming with guidlines for your chosen career. I convinced my aunt at 16 to let me get my belly button periced, which was super awsome when i was 16 but now that im 24 and its been out for years im regretting still having a little hole there. Especially now that Im pregnant. At 18 I dont know if I even would have had the balls to do it and go on my own, but at 16 with my aunt there to give permission and to hold my hand it was no bigdeal.

So I would say wait. She is so young now and has plenty of time to grow up. Most people with them are 18 and you dont wanting her looking prematurly older than she is. Give her somthing to look forward to. At 13 I was fianlly aloud to get my second ear peircing holes. And at 18 I made my own choices!

There were alot of things I liked and thought were cool while in highschool and younger but by 18,19,20 I realized that wasnt the image I wanted to give the world of myself. I would love to get my nose peirced and Im def. thinking of doing it... but Im 24..... Definitely give her somthing to look forward to.... because what will she want when she is 15 or 16 or 18?

[mommy68]

I think it's too young. I have a 13 yr old (boy) now and wouldn't allow it. But then again, he isn't the type that would want it.

At that young of an age things are done because of peer pressure and to be like other people. It's not done because it's something they have a huge inner desire to do. I was 13 once, I remember.

[mommy68]

Originally Posted by tbone_kneegrabber

I would way rather my kid get a piercing, which can always be taken out when they sell out and join corporate america (oh the tears I would shed!) than do the things I did at 13 (lose virginity etc)

but a lot of children DO have sex very early on these days and getting a nose ring is one thing that can be done to attract other people to them.

You can't possibly think that because you willingly go with your child and allow them to get a piercing or tattoo while they are still a child that it will keep them from wanting to have sex early. Give me a break. I wanted nothing to do with tattoos and didn't even have my ears pierced when I started having sex at the age of 14. But then again, in the 80's only white trash did the piercings/tattoos where I came from. It's funny that all that mess is so widely accepted now. ick. I laugh sometimes at the thought of all the teens and kids in their 20's that will one day look back in ohhh about another twenty or thirty years and wonder why the h*ll did I do this to the one and only body I'll ever have.

[tbone_kneegrabber]

Originally Posted by mommy68

but a lot of children DO have sex very early on these days and getting a nose ring is one thing that can be done to attract other people to them.

You can't possibly think that because you willingly go with your child and allow them to get a piercing or tattoo while they are still a child that it will keep them from wanting to have sex early. Give me a break. I wanted nothing to do with tattoos and didn't even have my ears pierced when I started having sex at the age of 14.

I wasn't saying that going with them to get a piercing would keep them from having sex, what I am saying is that there are *worse* things than a nose ring, or things that you might dislike your child to do more than a nose ring.

[karina5]

I am usually the type to let a kid make their own decisions when it comes to their bodies but I would say "No, you need to wait until you're older" with this one.

Why?

Because I have a ton of friends who had their nose pierced. I don't think any of them where a nose ring now (isn't it sort of a dated look anyway?) yet they all have a little hole left over in their nose that they hate. So because of the permanent damage it can do to a body, I would say that a child had to be older before making a decision like this.

Same with tattoos.

[karina5]

Originally Posted by FancyD

I said no. It's her nose, and at that age she's ready to start making decisions like that. I would not let a 13 year-old get a tattoo, but that's permanent. A nose piercing closes up.

See, I disagree about it closing up. I just posted that I know several women pals of mine who really hate that they still have a hole in their nose.

Also, I haven't worn earrings in something like 15 years, yet I still have holes in my ears.

[Fyrestorm]

An unused nose piercing looks like a giant blackhead!

[gradmama]

Thanks mamas for the variety of opinions! And... for making this the best responded-to thread of mine EVER!

Health and safety were my first concerns, concerns I am well aware of as a pierced (well, not so much anymore, but...) and tattooed woman. Dd13 is mature enough to take care of it and its something she's been asking for for at least a year. And, again, I have no moral compunction about this. And....being the nonconformist that I am (although I never pierced my face, except for my tongue), I'm of the f*ck society mindset. I really don't think that she'll not get a job because of her nose stud; she can take it out for work if necessary. If she gets grief from people because of this choice, then that's actually a pretty good lesson to learn at a young age in a relatively harmless way (especially harmless because its something SHE can change if it bothers her). She can make her own decisions about what she is comfortable with...

From what I can tell, the shops that I would give business to in the town I live will not pierce her before she's 16. I took her with me recently to a parlor ('cuz I'm scheming on my next tattoo) and asked about it in front of her so I'm not the bad guy . She seemed to accept it with, "man, nobody my age can do ANYTHING." While I think that 16 isn't necessarily "law" in this state, and I'm sure I could find a place in the city near me that would meet my standards and do it, I'm not going to search hard. As she gets older, if its something she really continues wanting, I'll find a solution before she does it herself.

Again - thanks everyone! Can I say again that I was really really excited to have one of MY threads go 5 pages!! (yes, i'm clearly also a dork.)

P.S. I've also learned NOT to attach rewards or extras other than the ability to play sports to grades. Duly noted.

[kijip]

Originally Posted by princesstutu

Furthermore, are we seriously using potential unemployment at amusement parks as reasons to not allow a nose piercing?

Exactly this. I have my nose pierced, have had it since I was about 20. Since that time, I have worked for the Opera, worked at an attorney's office, worked in non-profit management and raised hundreds of thousands of dollars from individual and foundations (lots of face to face meetings). The fact that I can't work at Burger King or the movie theater or Disney making $7-8/hour is no skin off my teeth. If you have the skills and don't live in a very conservative place, having a small nose piercing is not going to impact your employment options. I have friends with similar piercings that are in just about every professional field. Our old pediatrician has one even, it is getting to be a non-issue.

[DiannaK]

Originally Posted by mtiger

Many/most retail establishments (apart from Hot Topic, etc) don't allow more than two piercings per ear when at work.

in the health care field, facial piercings (eyebrow, nose, lip, etc) have to be removed, or covered up (bandaid) while working.

[smillerhouse]

mY DAUGHTER HAS PIERECED HER OWN ear several times in the last few years (she is now 15) It never lasts more than a few days. Sallie

[UnschoolnMa]

I voted incorrectly due to misunderstanding the wording. I meant yes- I would allow it. And I did! My Dd got her nose pierced at 13 and her naval pierced at 14. She is now considering doing a high cartilage piercing on her ear. She likes the look. We research and we have an excellent piercer that helps us understand things very clearly.

My job isn't to tell her what she can do with her own body. My job, IMO, is to help her understand what she's thinking of doing, to find info on it, get educated on the risks, and how to best avoid them. With all the info she can decide, with my gentle presence, if it's the best decision for her or not.

[PoppyMama]

Originally Posted by UnschoolnMa

I voted incorrectly due to misunderstanding the wording. I meant yes- I would allow it. And I did! My Dd got her nose pierced at 13 and her naval pierced at 14. She is now considering doing a high cartilage piercing on her ear. She likes the look. We research and we have an excellent piercer that helps us understand things very clearly.

My job isn't to tell her what she can do with her own body. My job, IMO, is to help her understand what she's thinking of doing, to find info on it, get educated on the risks, and how to best avoid them. With all the info she can decide, with my gentle presence, if it's the best decision for her or not.

I totally agree. My dd has asked to get a lip piercing when she turns 13 and told her to discuss it with the piercer (who is my dp) and he has agreed to do it for her if she shows she can take care of an easier piercing first.