Just curious: Did you and SO agree/disagree about vaccines? - Page 3

[Emmeline II]

Originally Posted by philomom

Like I said... two people make a marriage!

But two people need to research the issue; most often the pro-vax parent has not.

[apelilae]

Yes, we agree. We began questioning them when we were doing the Bradley Method. I did more research during pregnancy. We reviewed it together and decided not to do anything until at least one year to allow ourselves more time to thoughtfully consider and learn more. Then we pushed it to two thinking that if we did for the four vaccines we felt might be helpful, that would be the safest age to start. Then we read excerpts from Sear's Vaccine book and we decided to refusal all based on research and on a strong moral stance we both believe in.

[Just1More]

I think we've mostly always agreed. He's a researcher by nature, and an avid reader...so when something crosses his path, he looks it up. I guess I don't have any advice for a vaxing arguement, per se...

BUT...I know that I get a lot farther in all conversations (you catch more flies with honey) if I respect him and his thoughts. Instead of putting my foot down with the high and mighty I know better than you attitude, I say, "What do you think about...." Then I know what I have to work with. And I don't launch into debunking him...that puts anyone on the defense. I say, "Well, I was reading and I came across ...., it's from the .... (for credibility). I was really interested about this part...(explain short concern). What do you think about that?" Or...skip the above and say... "I'm really concerned about x because I read in y that z is true. Does that bother you? I mean it seems to really go against blah blah blah...." In our family, I often say (actually, we say to each other on various things)..."I'm struggling with/looking into/concerned about/etc. Would you mind praying for me about that?"

Then it doesn't have to be a fight. It's just a conversation. And, if you are a praying family...you can't pray for very long about something before the issue becomes real to you. And, if you aren't, basic conflict resolution techniques really go a long way.

I would say, "I'm really worried about vaccinating. I read (insert extremely reliable source) that it's okay to delay until x time to start. Can we wait until then and talk about it some more?"

And, then, in the time I just bought, I would research, one disease at a time (in order that the shots are given) and tell him everything I read. Again, in a totally non-confrontational, non-overwhelming way. Just a "here's what I did today" kind of thing. And see where that takes you.

I would caution you against using sources that cannot be called 100% credible by anyone mainstream. Read whatever you want to bolster your own confidence, but when you're trying to convince someone who has the mainstream mindset, I think you should stick to stuff that no one can argue with. My favorites are the CDC website (really read EVERYTHING, especially the stuff for health professionals. Just dig and dig all over that site.) They pretty well give you enough info to not vax without looking any farther. Then, go to the Johns Hopkins site with the package inserts and read those...that gives you ingredients and studies from the manufacturer themselves. See, what I mean? You don't have to use something that's immediately going to be throw out (even if it IS right) because it's biased against vaxing....there's plenty from those who are PRO vax to keep me from doing it.

Hope I helped maybe a little.

(c: