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Unexpected!!! - Page 3

post #41 of 94
Brooklyn Actor, I am going to give you the advice that I wish I had to give my ex when we unexpectedly got pregnant.

At the time I was 24, he was 28. We had dated seriously for 2 years, then off and on for the next 3. We were young, trying to get our footing, and then we got pregnant.

When he told his parents we were expecting a baby they had a very similar reaction to your parents. He told them without me, he was trying to protect me, he expected they would be mad, and they were mad. Convinced we had ruined our lives. My parents on the other hand were thrilled, my dad was concerned but mostly excited.

His parents put a lot of pressure on him, which in then turned into him putting pressure on me. When I got pregnant I was an up and coming musician and he was a up and coming artist and tattoo artist. All of a sudden he wanted us to figure out what we were going to do, what career path were we heading in. I just wanted to live healthy and simply and raise a child, I wasn't expecting to also figure out some invisible career path I hadn't planned on already.

The pressure was too much and by the time I was 6 months pregnant I had called it quits. That wasn't the only reason we broke up, but the pressure he was putting on me made all our other previous issues that much scarier for me.

Guess what, I'm still not on a solid career path, and my ex is still an artist. But we're also not together, and I didn't have my best friend with me when my child was born. My child, my beautiful daughter is 8 years old, and is a true delight. I often wonder what could have come of us if that pressure to get it together hadn't been put upon us.

Being a parent, even when planned is scary. I had to go into therapy when my dd was 1 year old due to post traumatic stress disorder. I kept all these scary feelings inside, and since I didn't have my best friend to talk to, I didn't talk to anybody about it.



I'm glad you and your partner went away on vacation. Right now you need to talk to her about expectations, and such. There is no reason in the world to rush into a marriage. No reason to rush into a career. You both can create the life you both want for your child, and if your parents don't like it, that's just too bad. Because this unexpected journey can be beautiful and delightful and just how you and your partner would like it to be. This is your life. Create the world you want. You don't need all the answers. With kids sometimes there is no right answer.

Congratulations.
post #42 of 94
First off congratulations dad. I think you are going to make a great father. You are already seeking support and looking for answers. Enjoy this time. Try to make it special because you will want to look back on this time fondly.
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrooklynActor View Post
Hello All,

So I don’t know what will happen in the long run. However things have been more positive. We had our second appointment with our midwife, who is GREAT! She is really really wonderful. She’s very approachable, non-judgmental, and tremendously warm and positive. Actually the first time we met with her before Costa Rica was the first moment I felt a tinge of excitement. Oh yeah, we’ve decided on a home-birth. Which actually has been a conversation that my DP and I have had many conversations about over the past 2 years and I love the idea of. On a side note, Does any one know any good “father-to-be” books. I went to B&N and hated most of the books I picked up. Most of them were these macho-machismo patronizing book which made comments like “Well we’re certainly not having any type of hippie homebirth, I like certificates on walls from Doctors who know what their doing…. Blah blah blah” and then going on to say stuff about “football and when does the sex come back”. Any suggestions on really good books for Fathers-to-be that might be a little more liberal and not so “mainstream”?
I think anything written by Dr. Sears had great information. not specifically for dad's but go get The Baby Book by Dr. Sears, I think he may also have a dad's book.


Quote:
Originally Posted by BrooklynActor View Post
Last night I told my parents. We had told my DP's parents a few weeks ago. They were so excited and tearful! It really was beautiful. perhaps over optomistic but still very positive non the less.

Last night could not have been more different. It's not what was said it's what wasn't said. The utter shock and look of dissapointment. I could read it all "how could you let this happen! How could you do this! You have really f--k things up this time!" It took sooo much for me to say "we're pregnant" Just for the words to come out. I procrastinated the whole night, thinking about it as we all had dinner, not knowing what to say, feeling a dread and dispair deep with in. I'm still trying to catch up and I'm scared as all hell about the massive responsibility ahead. I was immediately hit with everything I expected. I hate being right! First came "you think you're ready for this...well, I hope you're getting married...Well you can no longer be selfish ... I hope you're going back to school (give up this silly thing of acting! also "back to school" meaning get a NEW career, I have a BFA from Carnegie Mellon), So what are you going to do?" I answered "well we're going to take it one step at a time" Reply: "that's not good enough!" I felt myself getting smaller and smaller, I felt the heaviness of dissapointment and the look in their eyes. I've never felt so small and empty inside! I don't have all the answers! H-ll I hardly have any of the answers! Yes I've been freaking out! Yes I could use all the support possible! But NO i'm not giving up my career to become a ... Pharmacutical salesman or some 9-5 office job. And I'm not going to Jump into Marriage simply due to circumstances! Simply because society says you need a piece of paper cause without it you and partner and your baby will live in shame! A Bastard child! Come on! do we live in the 14th century!???? Don't even think that language is even used anymore! I felt sooo terribly deflated, I felt myself shutting down! Empty inside! the Moments of silences seemed to last an eternity. I wanted to scream and yell and get out of there! actually I just wanted them to leave so I could lay down! If I felt overwhelmed hearing the news of the pregnancy I felt collapsed sitting there in judgement and dissapointment. My father at one point said "congratulations", My heart warmed to my dad like never before, One thing positive even if he was just saying it because he should! My mother sat across still wanting answers trying to sugercoat although the internal monologue was racing. My relationship with my parents is unusual, I'm very close with them, and they very much like to be involved in my life, they own my apartment in NYC which cuts down on my rent (I still pay rent every month just not market value which would be $1000 a month if not more plus my roommates amount) that fact though does give them a certain amount of "authority" over me even at the age of 28. in their minds I'm an actor because they allow me the privelage to be an actor. And of course the fact that I lost my job recently is playing right into their fears as well, "how is he going to support a child, he can't even support himself!" They still very much think of me as their child, their son, their young little boy!!! As they left my mother gave me the most passive embrace and whispered with sternness "we need to talk!" Both left. I sat there, laid down, feeling the size of nothing and empty and cold inside. I feel myself shutting down to everything and everyone! My DP tried to console me. We both knew we would have polar opposite reactions from our family and it played out just as we thought. But still nothing can prepare you for that. I told my DP that living here may not be possible. she understood. unfortunately it's going to get worse. it's going to get much more nasty. My parents remained composed and collected in front of DP but once alone they will release! For me I will either try to stand up for myself which will simply fuel the fire or shut down and take it. Neither sound appealing. In fact both sound awful. I can't even really stand up for myself because I don't have all the answers! Marriage, Career, am I ready, are we ready, where are we going to live??? Well you did this to yourself so now you have to live with it! luckily my dp has a very stable job as a teacher which makes a very livable wage. and Luckily my DP is amazingly supportive and encouraging of my career. She says that's what she fell in love with and she would never want me to give it up! Wish last night had gone better! feel so alone.


I am so sorry to hear this, not just your parents reactions but your reaction to them. I know it's hard but please don't let their response color your thoughts about the baby. And please don't allow anyone let you feel small or worthless, or doubt yourself. You sound like a pretty thoughtful person. It is going to be a challenge but that's normal. Whether planned or unplanned babies can shake up your life. But in a good way if you let them. Allow yourself to embrace the wonder of this time, that little bean growing inside your gf is going to wrap your heart around it's little finger the moment they are born.

Hope you are feeling better today. You are going to need all your internal strength to stand up to your parents. Good luck. Hope the job search is going well.
post #43 of 94
Thread Starter 

Whisper becomes a roar!

I don't mean to sound like a complainer or just over reacting or a woo is me mentality but last night just down rights sucked and was hurtful.

I agree my parents have been way to involved in my life! Last night I called my mother back after she left a message and she just let loose. Tearing into me on all fronts, expressing her utter disappointment, "How can you possibly support a child", "haven't we told you never to bring a child into this world who you can't support", and then basically saying I can no longer live here! The hits just keep on coming. Ironically I had already started looking for a new place to live but it did hurt to hear that! At a time when I am dealing with so much and trying to deal with it responsibly I don't need those who love me to be telling me off and saying I f--ked up and that it's time to become a man. "Tough Love!" the conversation just seemed to get worse and worse as I tried to hold my ground. They seemed like they wanted to find blame, Questioning why a Diaphragm and not condoms. i feel they have all these bad examples of unplanned pregnancies from my cousins, to friends of family to even my father. But that doesn't have to be me. They a certain now that my career is lost and will never be. My GF could not be more supportive of my career as an actor. Knowing that we will find a way. sure I'll have to pull back a little on the amount of regional theatre I end up doing, but I wanted to focus of NY Film/TV more in my career. I've recently realized that you can't make a living doing regional theatre only. The Top theatre in the country with a year long contract still only pay under $30,000! CRAZY! So now is when I need to start trying to tap into Film and TV. My GF and I have talked that even me being an actor with a flexible schedule and normally my days free would actually work better cause than I can spend many of my days with the baby, while my GF is at work teaching and done by 3pm. Look we no longer live in the 1950's where the man goes to work and the Woman stays home with the baby! we live in a modern society! These gender stereotypes are bent and broken all the time! And why not. way I figure it the dad has a lot of catching up to do with the baby. The Mom and baby and been growing together for the past 9 months and ... well... the mom has the breasts so all living things love what feeds them, so yeah the dad has a lot of catching up to do with this little one that's as much his!

Don't' really know how I'm going to repair things with my parents. Think I'm just going to give it time. But I worry that this negative reaction and how ever long it last will seriously effect the relationship with their grandchild and really how much they are involved or how much my GF and I would want them involved. I know I'm being very sensitive right now but last night was awful and hurtful and it doesn't seem like they'll ever be apologizing (My parents DON'T apologize). Just wish things could be a little easier.
post #44 of 94
You said yourself that your parents don't apologize...so if there is any making up to do it will be coming from you telling them you are sorry and you made a mistake....do you REALLY feel like that? Then what happens....do you go back to waiting for their approval for everything you do in life? Look, they will either get over it or they won't. If they do then they will go on and have a great relationship with their grandchild (hopefully) and if they don't get over it then they will have to write you off as a lost cause....but don't you feel like they already did that? The ONLY mistake you made is thinking and hoping that your mom and dad would accept your unborn child...it wasn't even a mistake because we all want our parents to be happy and I hate to say this, but give us validation. If they don't then we think we are worthless or whatever. Part of growing up is realizing that parents CAN and WILL be wrong, and often. Sometimes we see it soon, other times it happens a lot later in life, but eventually it does happen and it's very unsettling actually because they are our parents after all how in the world could they possibly be wrong about ANYTHING?
post #45 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by jdubbelewe View Post
My husband has decided that when I'm 3 mos pregnant is the appropriate time to inform me that he would like to divorce and that the thought of being a father fills him with nothing but dread. I've been staying at family and friends' homes the last few nights and came back to find that the spines of all of my baby books have been turned around so he doesn't have to see them and all of my magazines from the midwife are turned over. This is coming from my best friend and lover of over 8 years.
Um . . . I question ANY man's logic who thinks spliting with a woman who is carrying his child will somehow void the fact that he is a father! He still will be a father, and it isnt fair to throw it ALL onto your shoulders, who is probably just as afraid as him! It takes two to freakin tango, Its not like you raped him as he slept!! I know the last thing you want here is for someone to attack your once true love, but he is a coward!
When my husband and I were dating, and had only been together a month and a half we thought I was pregnant. As it turned out I wasnt. HOWEVER, the way he reacted to the possability will make me love him forever. He was on board! And that is the way a man should be, just the way a woman is on board, the way she likes it or not! His attitude was "well this isnt ideal! But we'll certainly make the best of it!"
And on a softer note, I have GREAT sympathy for you. My heart is really sore thinking of you, pregnant and by yourself! I am also expecting a baby, and the only thing that keeps me going is my husbands support. What an awful surprise! Hugs to you!
post #46 of 94
My ex threw up and cried when I told him I was pregnant with our 7 yr old. He was still in school, no job and I was the only one working.
Either....yes, its' normal to feel fine and then overwhelmed...it goes back and forth, back and forth.
Babies do have a way of changing life...and believe me, it's not all for the worse
My ex ADORES our son. He would do anything for him and has made profound changes in his life for him. As have I.
Life is what happens when we're trying to plan...so true.
post #47 of 94
I think your parents are in shock and not handling it as well as the could be. Most likely they will come around as this baby becomes more real for them.
I'm sorry they aren't helping matters right now. But in terms of loving this baby and being a part of your child's life I suspect they will come around and be just thrilled to pieces and enjoy this child but they are still in the phase of shock and aren't connected to the baby yet. So on that end, give them time and space.

Glad you and your GF seems to be supportive of each other. Wishing you well...
post #48 of 94
Your parents will come around. It sounds like you've needed some independance from them for a long time. You're 28, not a child. You're having a baby. It's completely normal. Most new parents don't have it figured out. When my husband and I started our family, we made less than 500 a month! We had no clue. We made it work anyway. You may go into and out of acting depending on your family's needs and what's available. Don't let your parents dictate your life. You're not a failure, you're a person. You're doing what you can.

It sounds like your gf has enough support for the both of you. Ditch the parents for awhile and let them come to you. They will. They're losing you and their grandchild if they don't. That's a waste and they'll either treat you like an adult or leave you alone.

Good luck and Congratulations!
post #49 of 94
any update?
post #50 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrooklynActor View Post
Last night I told my parents. We had told my DP's parents a few weeks ago. They were so excited and tearful! It really was beautiful. perhaps over optomistic but still very positive non the less.

Last night could not have been more different. It's not what was said it's what wasn't said. The utter shock and look of dissapointment. I could read it all "how could you let this happen! How could you do this! You have really f--k things up this time!" It took sooo much for me to say "we're pregnant" Just for the words to come out. I procrastinated the whole night, thinking about it as we all had dinner, not knowing what to say, feeling a dread and dispair deep with in. I'm still trying to catch up and I'm scared as all hell about the massive responsibility ahead. I was immediately hit with everything I expected. I hate being right! First came "you think you're ready for this...well, I hope you're getting married...Well you can no longer be selfish ... I hope you're going back to school (give up this silly thing of acting! also "back to school" meaning get a NEW career, I have a BFA from Carnegie Mellon), So what are you going to do?" I answered "well we're going to take it one step at a time" Reply: "that's not good enough!" I felt myself getting smaller and smaller, I felt the heaviness of dissapointment and the look in their eyes. I've never felt so small and empty inside! I don't have all the answers! H-ll I hardly have any of the answers! Yes I've been freaking out! Yes I could use all the support possible! But NO i'm not giving up my career to become a ... Pharmacutical salesman or some 9-5 office job. And I'm not going to Jump into Marriage simply due to circumstances! Simply because society says you need a piece of paper cause without it you and partner and your baby will live in shame! A Bastard child! Come on! do we live in the 14th century!???? Don't even think that language is even used anymore! I felt sooo terribly deflated, I felt myself shutting down! Empty inside! the Moments of silences seemed to last an eternity. I wanted to scream and yell and get out of there! actually I just wanted them to leave so I could lay down! If I felt overwhelmed hearing the news of the pregnancy I felt collapsed sitting there in judgement and dissapointment. My father at one point said "congratulations", My heart warmed to my dad like never before, One thing positive even if he was just saying it because he should! My mother sat across still wanting answers trying to sugercoat although the internal monologue was racing. My relationship with my parents is unusual, I'm very close with them, and they very much like to be involved in my life, they own my apartment in NYC which cuts down on my rent (I still pay rent every month just not market value which would be $1000 a month if not more plus my roommates amount) that fact though does give them a certain amount of "authority" over me even at the age of 28. in their minds I'm an actor because they allow me the privelage to be an actor. And of course the fact that I lost my job recently is playing right into their fears as well, "how is he going to support a child, he can't even support himself!" They still very much think of me as their child, their son, their young little boy!!! As they left my mother gave me the most passive embrace and whispered with sternness "we need to talk!" Both left. I sat there, laid down, feeling the size of nothing and empty and cold inside. I feel myself shutting down to everything and everyone! My DP tried to console me. We both knew we would have polar opposite reactions from our family and it played out just as we thought. But still nothing can prepare you for that. I told my DP that living here may not be possible. she understood. unfortunately it's going to get worse. it's going to get much more nasty. My parents remained composed and collected in front of DP but once alone they will release! For me I will either try to stand up for myself which will simply fuel the fire or shut down and take it. Neither sound appealing. In fact both sound awful. I can't even really stand up for myself because I don't have all the answers! Marriage, Career, am I ready, are we ready, where are we going to live??? Well you did this to yourself so now you have to live with it! luckily my dp has a very stable job as a teacher which makes a very livable wage. and Luckily my DP is amazingly supportive and encouraging of my career. She says that's what she fell in love with and she would never want me to give it up! Wish last night had gone better! feel so alone.
ok I have much to comment on but first and formost CONGRATULATIONS! I can already tell you are going to be a great father by how involved you are getting with strollers, slings, doulas, midwives and home births!! This is awesome to see coming from a dad!! (btw have you looked into vaccines? thats a whole other post)

I wanted to comment that I totally agree with you that just because you are having a child it should not MAKE you get married. Get married for the right reasons. Im glad that you are not easily swayed. As the saying goes, if you dont stand up for anything you will fall for everything. Which leads me to my next issue. You parents. Granted they dont see eye to eye with you. they are entitled to their opinion and whatnot but it is your DP and your life (not to mention this wonderful child on the way). you said you have two options: to either stand up for yourself that will fuel the fire or to shut down and take it... that is not completly true. You do have a third option. As an adult and a soon to be father and head of house you have the ability to say "I dont want to hear it." You cannot change what has already happened, you can only change how you deal with it. I am a strong believer that you should stand up for what you believe in and suggest that you do that at least once if you have not already to let them know where you stand. After that they can either take it or leave it... they can support you in your decision or they can turn around if they dont like what they see. dont let this discourage you. Yes you are 28, yes you are your own adult, but then stop acting like a child being scared of them. Im not trying to be harsh but your baby needs you to be a parent to them... not a child. once your baby is here you will find great strength and purpose in life you had no idea existed but intill then you are gonna have to step up and let your parents know that this time they dont have a say. They should be happy they have a grandchild on the way, and in the end I think they will be. Much luck to you.
post #51 of 94
From one actor to another… your story is very similar to mine. Listen. The question is this… do you see yourself being with the woman, the mother of your child. My, now wife and I got pregnant three months into our relationship… our long distance relationship. Now, at the time, we had already started working on a timeline to end the distance part… and actually have a real relationship. We got a lot of pressure from or family’s… because they felt the same way. If you guys were planning to get serious and get married down the road… just do it now. We didn’t we held steadfast. It is all about the baby… and I have to say, it is an amazing road.
We are now married… but be waited to do it on our own terms… it ended up being six months after our son was born… and I love the fact he was at our wedding. During our vows, he started crying and my wife eyes started to roll back in her head... not able to concentrate. So, I broke ranks, and got him from our friends who were holding him… and held him for the rest of the ceremony. Our picture of our “first kiss” is great. Our son is looking at the camera, peering through the triangle that our bodies had made when leaning in for the kiss.
My advice… if you and your girl were already on the road to being together… let it continue on the same pace. The pace of course is a little different now with the baby on the way… but you don’t need the added pressure of family trying to throw a shotgun wedding.
And yes, you are going to need to tell those parties pressuring to back off… everything will come in time.
post #52 of 94
I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this. My dh and I were engaged at the time we conceived our first dd. We were using bc (and i was taking regularly, didn't smoke, didn't drink) and obviously we still got pregnant. My dh freaked out too, just like you. We were already planning on a wedding taking place that fall (found out in June) so we just bumped the wedding up from Dec to Sept. We also knew there was going to be conflict when telling my family even though we were already planning on marriage. My mother outright disowned me and refused to be part of the wedding plans from then on. She finally came around 2 weeks before the wedding, and decided to get involved more for show than anything, but still wasn't agreeable to the pregnancy until 2 weeks before I had the baby. I'm telling you this because as bad as it seems right now with your parents, they can always come around. Sometimes it just takes time. I had a very close relationship with mine before all this as well, but I think the hardest thing for parents is letting go, and letting you make it on your own in the world, and make your own choices with out their consent. Since then we have had another dd, (also a bc baby, the shot that time) and my mother had the same reaction then. We are now expecting our 3rd in Aug, (yes ANOTHER bc baby - it just doesnt seema to work for us) and I am not planning on telling my family until I absolutely have to. I do not see them often anymore, but I am still dreading it nonetheless. My dh still had that OMGWTF reaction to our second and now our 3rd - dh was indefinetely laid off right after we found out this time, so it definitely upped the oh sh*t factor. I know that time will help with everything, and the most important thing (as a pp stated) talk to your dp. Setting everything out in the open makes it much easier to know where you are at emotionally, financially. we have came to a place of knowing that God obviously wanted these children to be on earth, and he will help us provide for them. I hope that your situation resolved/is resolving itself (as I know this is an older post.) Do what you and your dp feel is right, and don't let anyone make your choices for you. This is your family now, and only you, and dp get a vote in it.

Good luck!
post #53 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by janasmama View Post
We had a baby, totally unexpected, unmarried, and so not ready! It's been a wonderful change in our life. Focus on growing and nurturing the relationship with the woman you love. Parenting will come in due time when the questions/concerns arise.
same here.

for what it's worth, my partner and i have been on-again-off-again for three years, he's 22, i'm 21, both very low income. he has been struggling with 'mental illness' and drug abuse for the past year, but is a wonderful person and we still care deeply for each other, and are staying together. when he found out that he's gonna be a daddy, his world changed for the better [despite feelings of utter overwhelm] it's difficult to adjust, but you CAN do it. the world is falling apart right now and it's hard to even want to bring more people into it : but what is happening right now is in direct result of what's between you and your girlfriend- your love!

you guys will figure it out!!
post #54 of 94
I am so happy for you. You will truly never, ever, know a stronger love than for your child. The moment you meet your little baby something unexplainable will happen to you and it is truly the most astonishing feeling in the world.
post #55 of 94
Thread Starter 

5 Months Later...

Hello all,

Well it's been 5 months since my last post. lot has happened since. My DP and I moved in together into a beautiful apt in Park Slope, Brooklyn. It became terribly important to live in an area that in ubber family friendly. We wanted to be near Prospect Park we are. We found a dream apartment which we jumped at after searching for 6 months. So we've been living here since Oct and it's been wonderful. It's be a whirlwind of a year. Finding out we're pregnant, telling the parents, dealing with the aftermath, growing from that, moving in together, and starting our life together. It feel on one hand that it's happened in a blink and on the other it feels like soooo much in a very little amount of time. So we are now at the precipice, we are standing at the cliff looking over the edge and preparing to jump! It's scary, nerve-racking, anxiety producing, overwhelming at times... AND...it's beautiful, and joyous. For months I spent many a nights in stir. waking continuously with my thoughts racing of the massive responsibility that lays ahead. My DP and I took our 6 week homebirth class and it was WONDERFUL to be around other couples all going through the exact same thing we are and having the same exact thoughts, fear, worries and joys. It was especially wonderful to know that all those thoughts are ok and normal! That everyone from the "most prepare" to the "least" all have those same thoughts and that that's ok! That was the greatest gift! For months I felt alien to myself and the world. I don't have ANY friends who have children, h-ll hardly any of my friends are even in long term relationships! so all of this has felt foreign. But talking with other parents and realizing that all this is OK has been such a blessing!
My newest creative outlet has been to build our baby website. Let me know what you think!

http://web.mac.com/jondrama/Pregnancy/Welcome.html

Thanks to all for your responses and words of insight!
Yeah a lot can change in 5 months
post #56 of 94
great to hear from you. you have been on my mind a lot. I'm SO happy you took homebirth classes! not only to get a **HOME** birth but to meet up with parents yeah those feelings are all normal. young couples so many times get traumatized with their first births, and *then* turn to homebirth for subsequent pregnancies so HUGE HUGE kudos to you and her for educating yourselves NOW. yeah for YOU! you (and especially her) will not have to 'recover' from anything. I mean some get post traumatic stress disorder from a terrible birth experience.

There are SO many hormones racing through mom during birth, this is planned, it's so we will bond with our babies, and so that we remember every tiny little detail of the birth. really. go to a nursing home, they can't tell you what they had for breakfast but ask them to tell you about the births of their 60-year-old babies and they won't leave a thing out. goes to show you how very important this is!

yeah for you!! and please don't go so long in between updates we gotta know how it all turns out!
post #57 of 94
Brooklyn Actor I'm so glad you came to share your positive update. : Congratulations on the upcoming birth of your child.
post #58 of 94
I've just seen your post (I'm a newbie at MDC) and read it from the start and felt that a can somehow relate. My fiance isn't ready yet (his fears are a lot like yours) to think seriously about babies and it sometimes get me sad but it's a compleat other story.

The thing that really made me want to respond to you is that earlier this week I've seen your baby website (don't even remeber from where I landed there) and foud it so inspiring and beautiful. You're such a cute couple. I felt the love you have for each other looking at your web site (not knowing your story then). It makes me kind of emotional to link the two. Weird when you think how you never really know how your life can be an influence on people you don't even know.

Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you the better for the birth and beyond.
post #59 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by sairy_gamp View Post
Some very good news for you.

It just as likely won't be as hard as it sounds.

Once you get thru these changes, I can say that being a papa is a wonderful, wonderful thing. Keep loving the time you spend together and don't worry too much about the correct order that you wanted things to come in.
:::
post #60 of 94
I have removed some posts from this thread, and will be PMing soon. Please keep your comments supportive of the OP.
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