Another circ'ed baby added.....

[GoodMomma]

Well my SIL is due the end of Sept and there's no sense to be given to this couple! I don't want to get into it all but my brother and I have talked about this topic over and over....he claims they've talked to a bunch of Drs. and nurses and he claims to have watched a video....yeah sure! Well anyway.....there's no reasoning and nothing more I or my sister can do.....they're going to circ. I hate to say it but I really hate them right now. The baby isn't even born yet and there's already a wedge between us. It sucks!

[nini02]

[Devaskyla]

[LavenderMae]

I'm sorry.

[tennisdude23]

Are you the one with the intact brother? And this other brother who is having the kid is much older and circed? Cause I remember saying maybe your younger brother will talk to him. By the way, it seems like they were ready to circ. from the beginning. Drs. and nurses is BS, and if he really watched the video, I doubt he would have been convinced to go through the procedure. Most people get sickened by the videos. Like I said in a previous post, some people you have to give up on. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. It sucks thought it's in your family. That must be hard.

PS: You would think that if his younger brother is uncut, foreskin would not be an issue; wow, some people are just so thick.

[Nandi]

Good for you for trying. Some people cling to their ignorance. Sigh.

[lovemybubus]

I'm sorry, I know how you feel. Sometimes when I know a pregnant woman that is going to circ I look at her belly and think of the sweet, innocent baby boy sleeping and all comfy in there and then I think about what awaits him in the harsh outside world. I'm proud of you for trying to talk some sense into them though.

[mommyswenn]

I'm pretty sure my bil and sil are expecting a boy in just a few short weeks... when they were pregnant with my niece, now two, they told us in no uncertain terms that they would be circ'ing if they had a boy. I was over the moon when my niece was born.

But this time... I think it's a boy.

[Yulia_R]

Originally Posted by GoodMomma

Well my SIL is due the end of Sept and there's no sense to be given to this couple! I don't want to get into it all but my brother and I have talked about this topic over and over....he claims they've talked to a bunch of Drs. and nurses and he claims to have watched a video....yeah sure! Well anyway.....there's no reasoning and nothing more I or my sister can do.....they're going to circ. I hate to say it but I really hate them right now. The baby isn't even born yet and there's already a wedge between us. It sucks!

make sure you TELL them your feelings very openly, with all honesty. and that this decision will probably affect your relationship for the rest of the life. they really have to know just how HUGE it is for you and why.

[MoonJelly]

You could try bribing them with college money for the boy. : Such as, (as you are holding a check) "I realize we've been through this again and again, but it means so much to me that I will give your son $500 in a growth savings account if you leave him intact (or whatever amount you feel is possible). That is how much it means to me." (Something along those lines. Haven't completely sussed it out yet.)

I saw that idea on here and I may just resort to that if it ever gets to this point with my brother. Probably wouldn't work or be appropriate for all people, but it just might work on my brother.

[thixle]

Originally Posted by Yulia_R

make sure you TELL them your feelings very openly, with all honesty. and that this decision will probably affect your relationship for the rest of the life. they really have to know just how HUGE it is for you and why.

:
Don't let it build up without them KNOWING what you think and feel.

[GoodMomma]

Originally Posted by tennisdude23

Are you the one with the intact brother? And this other brother who is having the kid is much older and circed? Cause I remember saying maybe your younger brother will talk to him. By the way, it seems like they were ready to circ. from the beginning. Drs. and nurses is BS, and if he really watched the video, I doubt he would have been convinced to go through the procedure. Most people get sickened by the videos. Like I said in a previous post, some people you have to give up on. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. It sucks thought it's in your family. That must be hard.

PS: You would think that if his younger brother is uncut, foreskin would not be an issue; wow, some people are just so thick.

Thanks all! Wow tennisdude....you have a good memory!! Umm....yeah I had talked to my younger brother about talking to him and he said no, he'd feel weird.....I guess he can talk to his sisters about it but can't talk to someone else with a penis, lol go figure! Anyway..... besides I honestly don't think it makes a difference if he were to talk to him. My older brother is extremely stubborn about this subject.

[GoodMomma]

Originally Posted by Yulia_R

make sure you TELL them your feelings very openly, with all honesty. and that this decision will probably affect your relationship for the rest of the life. they really have to know just how HUGE it is for you and why.

I did just that. He never says anything when I say things like that. And she knows how upset I was when they found out it was a boy.....she's been a b*tch to me ever since. I told him expect me to be pissed at them for a very long time and said sorry it's just the way I feel.....not that I should be apologizing to him but I do feel bad that something like this has to come between us. He's my brother and before this we were fairly close. It just makes me mad that he's so open minded about a lot of things, so I thought once the time comes he'll be open to learning about circ'ing....nope....shut his mind right up for that one.

[GoodMomma]

Originally Posted by MoonJelly

You could try bribing them with college money for the boy. : Such as, (as you are holding a check) "I realize we've been through this again and again, but it means so much to me that I will give your son $500 in a growth savings account if you leave him intact (or whatever amount you feel is possible). That is how much it means to me." (Something along those lines. Haven't completely sussed it out yet.)

I saw that idea on here and I may just resort to that if it ever gets to this point with my brother. Probably wouldn't work or be appropriate for all people, but it just might work on my brother.

OMG.....that's so funny because when my sister was pregnant the 1st time she wasn't sure what they were going to do. She knew how I felt etc etc. She started looking into it so she started questioning the practice. Then she found out she was having a girl, so she didn't bother looking into it anymore. So between pregnancies, she looked into it some more once they started trying again and I was thinking of offering them $500 to leave their next kid intact. But luckily she has become an intactivist so I didn't have to give out any money, lol. So her 4 month old son is intact. but I was actually thinking of that yesterday after this all happened about offering them the $500! Thanks for the reminder!

[4Blessings]

Originally Posted by GoodMomma

Well my SIL is due the end of Sept and there's no sense to be given to this couple! I don't want to get into it all but my brother and I have talked about this topic over and over....he claims they've talked to a bunch of Drs. and nurses and he claims to have watched a video....yeah sure! Well anyway.....there's no reasoning and nothing more I or my sister can do.....they're going to circ. I hate to say it but I really hate them right now. The baby isn't even born yet and there's already a wedge between us. It sucks!

As hard as it might be for you, you have to let it go now. You've said what you needed to say. You've given it your all. Don't let this come between you and the adults. The wedge that you've now created can/will affect the relationship you can have with this little boy. You need to decide if you are willing to give up the relationship with the child because you cannot let the issue go.
My sister is a circ'ing, bottlefeeding-without-any-attempt-at-bf, dump-them-in-daycare-because-I-can type of girl. I said what I needed to say on the issues and then made the decision that being in the children's life was more important to me than being right. I know in my heart that I would never make the choices she has made but they are done. Now I have to move on.

Good luck!

[mytwogirls]

Originally Posted by lovemybubus

I'm sorry, I know how you feel. Sometimes when I know a pregnant woman that is going to circ I look at her belly and think of the sweet, innocent baby boy sleeping and all comfy in there and then I think about what awaits him in the harsh outside world.

I don't know why but that just made me cry

[GoodMomma]

Originally Posted by Proud2BeAnAmerican

As hard as it might be for you, you have to let it go now. You've said what you needed to say. You've given it your all. Don't let this come between you and the adults. The wedge that you've now created can/will affect the relationship you can have with this little boy. You need to decide if you are willing to give up the relationship with the child because you cannot let the issue go.
My sister is a circ'ing, bottlefeeding-without-any-attempt-at-bf, dump-them-in-daycare-because-I-can type of girl. I said what I needed to say on the issues and then made the decision that being in the children's life was more important to me than being right. I know in my heart that I would never make the choices she has made but they are done. Now I have to move on.

Good luck!

That's exactly what I'm doing.....I'm just going to let it go. I mean I'll still think inside what morons they are, but I won't talk about it anymore. At least she's going to breastfeed....but for how long I have no idea.....and she recnetly has opened her eyes about not getting an epidural because she learned the risks at a childbirth class.....hello something me and my sister has been trying to tell her! So maybe if it's someone like a Dr. or nurse or educator......so I'm hoping they'll bring up circ'ing in the class and maybe they'll open their eyes.

[tennisdude23]

Originally Posted by GoodMomma

Thanks all! Wow tennisdude....you have a good memory!! Umm....yeah I had talked to my younger brother about talking to him and he said no, he'd feel weird.....I guess he can talk to his sisters about it but can't talk to someone else with a penis, lol go figure! Anyway..... besides I honestly don't think it makes a difference if he were to talk to him. My older brother is extremely stubborn about this subject.

I think it's photographic actually, lol. Anyway, I remember like the most random stuff, and I rarely have to write anything down to remember what I have to do. So, yeah, some of these stories I read on here are hard to forget. And I am sorry about the whole situation here. I really don't understand what's going on with your bro. here, given that he already knows intact people in his own family.

[DocsNemesis]

Probably wouldnt work but you could also try offering to pay for the whole surgery if he wanted it done after he was 18. Even put the money in a trust fund or something?