Originally Posted by GoBecGo
It sounds like biomom is having trouble without DSD there...
How far away is she? How is the relationship between her and your DH?
Could biomom see DD more, or have breakfast with you?
Rationally it seems like calling 4 times a day is a lot, but then parental love isn't rational really.
to you, tough situation!
Well, my Hubby and I have my stepdaughter every other weekend and every Wednsday (alternating between going back after dinner on Wednsday and staying until Thursday morning, depending on which Wednsday it is), so it's not like her Mother doesn't have her most of the time, anyways. They live 20 minutes from us and my stepdaughter's Mother has shown... strong disapproval... towards my Hubby and anyone on my Hubby's side of the family, especially me and my son. As for her Mother seeing her more, it's not a good idea. First of all, we don't have very much time with my stepdaughter to begin with, and secondly, because, for example, if we invited her to come to breakfast, then she would spend all the time with my stepdaughter and nobody else would get to spend time with my stepdaughter. It's happened before in similar situations. It's not that we want to keep my stepdaughter from her Mother- we've told her repeatedly that she can call her Mother anytime she wants when she's at our house- but she never wants to. (Yeah, I do admit, that seems kinda odd.) And when her Mother calls, it's to go on and on about how much she misses her and forces her to tell her Mother how much she misses her Mom, as well and how much she loves her Mother and how much she can't wait until she's "back home" with her Mother. It's that my Hubby and I don't get any time to spend with my stepdaughter when she's not being dominated by her Mother "needing" her. Her Mother will call for the silliest reasons- she's at the store and wants to know if my stepdaughter wants a red or a purple lollipop for when she gets "home"- or she'll call a half hour before my stepdaughter's due to go back, so we don't get to spend that extra few minutes with my stepdaughter. And if we call when she's at her Mother's house, she's usually "too busy" to come to the phone (when you can hear her watching tv and talking about the show in the background) and she's not even allowed to talk to anyone but my Hubby on the phone on the rare occasions she's "not busy". And Hubby can't turn off his phone because it's his work phone as well, so when the phone rings, my stepdaughter's right there asking if it's her Mother, because her Mother told her she'd be calling.
I'm not saying this to be mean or snarky, but it's like she has no life besides my stepdaughter and can't stand the thought of my stepdaughter having more to her life than just her Mother. know what I mean?