Labor support hints for dads?

[Bekka]

Hi Dads (and any moms with resources):

Do you know any websites or online resources for dads who want to support their wife in labor? A person I know is interested in natural birth and wants to support his wife, but she isn't sure if she's interested in natural birth. They're due in a couple of weeks.

Thanks anyone.

[brightonwoman]

That's really hard if SHE isn't sure it's what she wants.
I think #1 he can't pressure her into it--if he does she'll likely resent him for it, you know? Labor is hard work and if she feels like he's making it harder then any support efforts he makes are going to be overshadowed by a very literal "you did this to me" mentality I think.
That said, DH and I took classes and practiced methods with our doula and all kinds of things...and when it came down to labor, all I wanted was for him to hold my hand and keep talking to me. Seriously, all those fancy methods and whatever were totally out the window--I just wanted his voice (not my sister or the expensive doula). I had been a little nervous about how good a support he'd be, and had thought for sure I'd want a womans touch...nope. I just wanted him.

One thing I would recommend is for her to write a list of affirmations for him to say to her/with her. I read the lists in various books and created my own list for DH of things that would be helpful for ME. He said that was really helpful for him because it helped him know what to say when he wanted to comfort me.

[Molck]

Tons of info here: http://www.birthingnaturally.net/cnhome.html

[everettdaddy]

The only thing that I can suggest is that they need to talk things over, and he needs to realize that she needs to be as comfortable as can be.

[Verity]

Originally Posted by brightonwoman

Seriously, all those fancy methods and whatever were totally out the window--I just wanted his voice (not my sister or the expensive doula). I had been a little nervous about how good a support he'd be, and had thought for sure I'd want a womans touch...nope. I just wanted him.

I have to agree! My husband was the best labor support person I could have asked for. Just his presence made me feel safe, and his emotional strength and calm reassurance were just what I needed. With my first birth, I'd never heard of doulas, but once having gone through a birth with my husband at my side, I never even considered one.

[Miss 1928]

Originally Posted by Verity

I have to agree! My husband was the best labor support person I could have asked for. Just his presence made me feel safe, and his emotional strength and calm reassurance were just what I needed. With my first birth, I'd never heard of doulas, but once having gone through a birth with my husband at my side, I never even considered one.

:

I could not have had the experience I did without my Husband. His support was so important to me. Just his presence. --OK, and the fact that he pushed on my back during labor and that he literaly supported me by sitting behind me in the birthing chair during the delivery, and that after the delivery when I was having complications with the placenta and passing out I was able to have peace of mind and concentrate on myself because I knew that my husband had our baby girl in his arms the whole time.

I gave birth here in Italy and we're only allowed to have one "guest" in the delivery room and having my husband there was way more important to me than having a doula or midwife of my choice. --I did have 2 midwives, but I had never met them before.

Sorry, I'm not giving you any resources, just letting you know that for some of us the mere presence of the husband/partner is all we need.