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Do you knock? - Page 3  

post #41 of 55
8/2/08 at 6:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by barbara73069 View Post
And if we forget and barge in... well, whatever we see on the other side is our own fault.
LOL, I did that once by accident, never again. I definitely learned a good lesson.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, it only took dd once to figure out why the knocking rule was in place too. At least it opened the door (no pun intended... ah who am I kidding? Of course it was) for the talk.
post #42 of 55
8/2/08 at 6:22pm
My dd is only 2.5 and we knock on her door when we go in to get her in the morning - even tho she is standing in her bed yelling, Moooooooomy come get me, I am awake! When she's with me and we come to a closed door, we knock. Why? Because I want her to know that it's polite to knock.

My parents STILL don't knock and I'm a grown woman living in my own house. We keep our doors locked so that my parents (and other family) won't just walk right in. I have watched them from the kitchen window. Grab door knob, try to open. Look puzzled...is this some kind of trick? Finally knock on door. Are granted entrance. Ask, "Why was the door locked?"

Sigh.
post #43 of 55
8/2/08 at 6:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by NiteNicole View Post
My dd is only 2.5 and we knock on her door when we go in to get her in the morning - even tho she is standing in her bed yelling, Moooooooomy come get me, I am awake! When she's with me and we come to a closed door, we knock. Why? Because I want her to know that it's polite to knock.

My parents STILL don't knock and I'm a grown woman living in my own house. We keep our doors locked so that my parents (and other family) won't just walk right in. I have watched them from the kitchen window. Grab door knob, try to open. Look puzzled...is this some kind of trick? Finally knock on door. Are granted entrance. Ask, "Why was the door locked?"

Sigh.
To keep people who don't live in the house from gaining entrance.

Some people never learn about personal space.
post #44 of 55
8/2/08 at 7:04pm
Knock and wait for dd who is 14yrs.

Ds who is 9yrs has not figured out he can keep us out.

We have no locks on our interior doors so it is a big deal to learn to knock and wait around here.
post #45 of 55
8/2/08 at 10:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
LOL, I did that once by accident, never again. I definitely learned a good lesson.
Yeah, it only took dd once to figure out why the knocking rule was in place too. At least it opened the door (no pun intended... ah who am I kidding? Of course it was) for the talk.[/QUOTE]

As I said, none of us are big door closers here - dh and I's bedroom is separate from the kids', and we usually leave our door open at night since we can only barely here them if one yells for us. When ds was 15, he was talking on the phone late at night and answered call waiting and it was the hospital for me. He came barreling up the stairs and into our room (door open, can't blame him) calling for me to get the phone in the middle of some, uh, marital bonding. Poor kid took to standing around the corner out of sight and yelling for me after that one.
post #46 of 55
8/4/08 at 1:55am
Quote:
Originally Posted by lincap View Post
Amen!

My dad was a push the door open without warning guy. And I hated it. I would be 12, 14, 16 getting dressed and BOOOM push the door open.. "blah blah" and then I would yell "GET OUT I AM GETTING DRESSED!" and then he would say "OH,talk to me like that and you aren't going ANYWHERE!"...
It happened over and over and over... He would also say "MY house, MY door" or "I don't care If I see you naked..." Well.. *I*minded!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!
If your dad was that into marking his "territory", it's a wonder he didn't just pee on your bedroom door's frame too while he was standing there.

Quote:
Originally Posted by lincap View Post
Thank you all the door knockers! I will be a door knocker when the boys get bigger!
Agreed!

In the house I grew up in my bedroom was also the dining room, so I didn't have any doors and awoke every morning to the sight of my parents eating breakfast. When I was 11 we moved to a house where I had a "real", separate bedroom, COMPLETE WITH CLOSING DOOR! I was so thrilled to finally have a real bedroom, I kept the door shut all the time. Mom was good about knocking, but usually only after she had stuck her head in the door. Ooh... so close!
Probably because of this, I'm a pathological door-knocker: If the door is closed I knock on the door itself and if the door is open I knock on the frame, but either way I don't enter until invited.
post #47 of 55
8/4/08 at 2:02am
Once they get to a modest age/stage, I knock. No point if they aren't masturbating or embarrassed about me seeing them nekkid. First time they act embarrassed or ask me to knock, I do from then on.
post #48 of 55
8/4/08 at 2:03am
I remember throwing a book at my mom (it didn't actually hit her, and I had my reasons) when I was fourteen cause she opened the door to my room when I was at her house interrupting some 'personal' time. Even after that she refused to know. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Lincap, my mom had the same reasoning as your dad. It was her house she didn't permission to go into any room unannounced. Basically one of two main reason I lived with my dad.
post #49 of 55
8/4/08 at 2:06am
We knock, and then open the door slowly, unless the kids call out "hold on" or something...

My mom knocked.

My dad read my diary and beat me for the contents.

I try to respect my kids' privacy.
post #50 of 55
8/5/08 at 1:19pm
I have started knocking for my dd 8.5 because she is developing a healthy sense of modesty. Even if she calls me from the bathroom( she has bowel leakage issues and is still learning to manage it on her own) I knock first then just stick my nose in the door and ask her if she wants me in or just to fetch something. She is very close to puberty - she just hit 5 ft!!! 4 inches in 6 mos. and has a little boyfriend who I adore. I want to develop trust so that when the hormones kick in she knows I respect her privacy. Then we can have discussions about what is appropriate in private and what needs to be not private until she's older. Right now I let her close the door when McGwire is over b/c it keeps her db from busting into their time together. Usually they are just playing legos or he is putting her make up on and making her hair pretty and all done up ( he has a little sister and a teenage sister) so I'm not worried. When they want to hold hands they go outside on the bench over the crick and *that* is their 'private' spot - in clear view, but with their backs to us and ds isn't allowed over there b/c he can't follow the safety rules. (the bank is very steep and loose and it's too easy to fall & there's an old dam, and about 2 feet of muck under the water so he could get hurt very easily or drown not mention the poison ivy!)

I guess when my daughter gets just a touch older we will talk. I live in a very religiously conservative area, although like me, not every person fits that corner. MY concern about dd and bf being intimate is more about bf getting in trouble w/ his parents and them getting angry with me, thereby risking the kids relationship altogether. I don't have a no sex attitude, but after my experiences, I want to have MUCH better communication about healthy relationships with dd and ds in time for them not to get really hurt & embarrassed like poor girl across the street. She lost her virginity to a schmuck and he dumped her and broke her heart.
post #51 of 55
8/10/08 at 3:20pm

knocking

YES,YES,YES
Remember if we want our children to respect us we have to respect them. Treat others as you want to be treated!!!

Crista
post #52 of 55
8/10/08 at 9:03pm
I always knock but boys are not allowed in the bedrooms.

In my house growing up boys were only allowed on the first floor, not up on the second floor. Same rule applys in my house now.
post #53 of 55
8/10/08 at 9:11pm
*
Nevermind
post #54 of 55
8/10/08 at 9:55pm
Knocking is only polite, and I think it's important to let our children know that we respect their privacy. After all, we should model to our children the behavior that we expect from them. We can't be bursting into their room without warning in and get angry when they do the same to us. Mutual respect goes a long way with teenagers, and children in general.
post #55 of 55
8/10/08 at 11:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
LOL, I did that once by accident, never again. I definitely learned a good lesson.

Uh, yeah, that's where I am. Knock and wait till he's dressed

My parents didn't knock, very old-fashioned immigrant parents. They grew up in a place where families lived 10-15 people per house. The whole "personal space" thing we have here in North America confused the heck out of them. They thought that asking them to knock meant we were hiding something very, very bad

I am very used to having no personal space, so knocking was something we both had to get used to, once ds hit puberty. Wasn't ever an issue when he was younger, he always preferred to be wherever I was anyway.
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