Homebirth with MW...Do I need a doula too?

[Nannysbaby]

DD is planning a hb with a mw. At first she didn't think it was neccesary to have a doula, but now she is having second thoughts.

A little background...this is her second baby. First was unmedicated hospital birth with the wonderful support of two doulas. (one was in training) An hour after she gave birth she told me that she did not need to be in a hospital and thus, the hb.

Her midwife has mentioned that she will come to her whenever she needs her, has no qualms whatsoever about a doula, says the choice is hers.

What does everyone think? Is the midwife usually the only support that you need at birth, along with family and friends? Or is it similar to the relationship that occurs in a hospital setting where the main caretaker is in and out to simply check on progress?

I realize that there are as many answers to this question as there are stars in the sky! But thought I would ask anyway. I would appreciate any input.

Thanks!

[littlest birds]

My midwives had apprentices who helped them, so the midwife already arranged for a second person to be there.

Is it necessary? No. At my last homebirth for our fourth child, in fact, the midwife was late and it was just me and dh. I loved that birth. If I have a midwife for another birth, I will have her stay in a completely separate room until afterward unless I need her.

Obviously everyone is different. I discovered I enjoyed being alone and private best of all. It was not a situation that made me fearful. I have had good help at births and not-so-helpful help as well. Some women really like to be supported, to have someone else giving them attention and giving feedback as they birth.

Unless for personal preference, I think a midwife is enough. Midwives are usually much more present than a dr. would be. Where else would a midwife go? Family and friends, too... Plenty.

[D'sMama]

I'm most likely going to hire a doula for my HB.

One advantage is that the doula will come early in labor, whereas the midwife may want you to call later on, once you reach a certain frequency of contractions. I think it's probably better to have that constant, experienced support earlier on in labor.
Another plus: another set of hands for you & for DH/DP, to massage, hip squeeze, get food/drink, cool washcloths, etc.
Also, when the MW or the doula needs a break, the other can still be there with you.

[hybridmom]

Originally Posted by Nannysbaby

DD is planning a hb with a mw. At first she didn't think it was neccesary to have a doula, but now she is having second thoughts.

A little background...this is her second baby. First was unmedicated hospital birth with the wonderful support of two doulas. (one was in training) An hour after she gave birth she told me that she did not need to be in a hospital and thus, the hb.

Her midwife has mentioned that she will come to her whenever she needs her, has no qualms whatsoever about a doula, says the choice is hers.

What does everyone think? Is the midwife usually the only support that you need at birth, along with family and friends? Or is it similar to the relationship that occurs in a hospital setting where the main caretaker is in and out to simply check on progress?

I realize that there are as many answers to this question as there are stars in the sky! But thought I would ask anyway. I would appreciate any input.

Thanks!

I think its all about how your DD feels. Does she feel she needs the xtra support? Does she think she'll be okay with another person there?

I hired a doula and I will have two mws attend my birth (along with DH and various family members). I personally like the idea of a doula because she is there solely for the mother. She is her support system...and she can play whatever role is needed at the time. They usually do not leave the mother and stay with her from the first stage of labor...untill the baby is born and then afterwards to give support. They can help the DH or birth partner and guide them into helping the mother during her labor...she can give him a break.. I can go on and on...I'm trying not to write a book! Midwives are there for the mother too..but more for the actual birth IMO..though this can vary from individual mw. A doula is there strictly for the mother.

I will say that I'm only 19 weeks along and my Doula has proved invaluable. She has gave me so much insight on what I need...and advice and ways to handle my caregivers and what questions to ask. Things I would have NEVER thought of if I didn't have her! I can call her anytime...24/7 and she always listens no matter what. She's given me a lot of confidence that I can do this! For me, it was a great decision!

I did go through a period where I was freaking out about having so many people at my birth...thinking "wow a doula AND two midwives!" I gave it alot of thought, and I know I want that xtra support and for DH too as he may need it. Sorry I wrote so much! :

[baby_baby_mommy]

It depends how many other ppl will be there to support your DD. Does she have a partner or someone else to be her support during labor? Around here, most homebirth moms don't also hire a doula unless the mom is unpartnered and doesn't have other support (usual setup here: midwife comes during active labor and stays 'til after the birth, with a second midwife coming later in labor to be support for mw#1).

[Belle]

My dh said he could have used a doula during our hb, but I don't think I needed one. We had a false alarm the night before so our kitchen was kind of a mess. MIL came over and helped us clean up so dh could be with me in the bathrrom. Then dd1 woke up and MIL took her into her room to play until I was crowning. My MWs arrived about an hour before dd2 did. If we have any other births they may be even faster. Don't know if either MWs or doula will make it for future births.

[janasmama]

I have had 2 homebirths and never had a doula. Both of the midwives (different for each birth) were totally emotionally supportive and physically also. They would massage my legs, etc.

If the mw seems to be emotionally connected and says she will come when needed rather than at 8cm, etc. then I would consider not having a doula b/c I think the less people at the birth the better. Plus, you can usually develop a closer relationship with a mw since you see them for about 30w whereas a doula you may meet 3 times.

[moderngal]

I'm having a doula at my hb next month. DH and I both want the support of a doula in addition to our midwives. I really believe having these women here to support me will be empowering and comforting.

[weliveintheforest]

I think it is better to have a doula available, who you can always ask to step back, than to wish you had one.
Even if you have a great MW it's always nice to have an extra set of experienced, caring hands around. She can make sure everyone stays fed and looked after, and if mw or dh need a rest she can be there for Mama.

[Otterella]

I haven't had my homebirth yet, but I am planning on having both. Since I am a doula, I am probably biased, but I really feel that the functions of a midwife and a doula are totally different. No matter how caring she is, it really isn't a midwife's job to be doula support. Since I am doing an HBAC, I am also concerned about experiencing an intense sense of self-doubt about whether I can do it or not, and I really want an experienced doula to help me cope with that.

[jennyfah]

I think every birthing woman deserves a doula!!! :

Mine was vital and amazing at our homebirth. Remember, doulas support you and your partner---a doula is not a replacement for the emotional/physical support that you want and need from DP. They just really, really know how to do the right thing at the right time!

Best wishes,
Jen

P.S. I wonder if any midwives want to chime in on whether they appreciate a doula's presence at a HB? My MW seemed happy to step back and let my doula do the emotional support, freeing her up to focus on the physical aspects of the birth. (I'm sure it really varies from person to person.)

[alegna]

I think it depends on what the woman wants. I've not had a doula at my 2 homebirths and didn't want one. BUT I am not usually big on female support AND my dh is a FABULOUS support person for me.

-Angela

[runes]

in retrospect, and knowing what i know now, i wish we would have hired a doula for our homebirth, and if we are so blessed to have another baby, we will plan a homebirth with a doula.

[Pyrodjm]

We hired a doula last minute. I really didn't think we would need one but I was SO glad she was there. DH was great support for me all throughout labor. But I really panicked during transition and having someone that had helped woman through labor before really helped me. She coached DH in how to help me it made a huge difference. My doula arrived before my midwife and I had a short labor. My midwife was phenomenal but I loved having a doula there also.

[SiobhanAoife]

It's really nice to hear from people who've had, and valued having, both.

I signed up (and paid a non-refundable deposit to) a doula prior to deciding to transfer my care to a midwife and have a home birth, and so I kinda felt like, oops, well, I guess I'm having both, I wonder if that's a waste of money... So I'll be having both, and in the end I thought it probably all for the best because I quite like the doula and think it'll be nice having her support prior to when the midwife would want to come over (this is my first, so help in determining when I *need* the midwife to come over will be appreciated in addition to the support!).

So it's nice to hear from women who liked having both, makes me feel less silly about having both

[frontierpsych]

I will have a team of three midwives for my birth, plus DH will be there, so I didn't feel the need for a doula. If I had only one midwife though I could see a doula coming in handy.

[mrforbes]

I couldn't have done it w/o my doula and I had a very wonderful midwife and partner there. There can be a lot to do at a birth and w/o the doula I would have had to labor very independently at times.

[barefootpoetry]

I might have a doula for my HB. DH is a terrible labor partner and it'd be nice to have someone there whose sole focus is supporting me and not doing all the stuff my two MWs have to do as well. She could also take pictures. She is volunteering for free, so if I don't feel like I need her, I just won't be calling her and that'll be that.

[foogoomomma]

I think it depends on the person birthing. While having a support person is nice.. I know for sure that during birth I like to be left alone and deal with the contractions on my own. I'll also have my mom and husband there in addition to 2 midwives so I think I'll have more than enough people present for support

[Otterella]

I also want to suggest that you may want to look into a doula who also does birth photography. Many of them do offer that. That way you have the doula support if you need it, but if you wind up feeling like it is superfluous, you won't feel like you've wasted the money when you have a wonderful photographic record of the whole experience.