Whilst I agree that labels aren't always useful, and can have a negative effect, it is also very difficult as a parent of a 'gifted' child to have their special needs recognised.
So many cliches come out when you talk of very able children. Like, 'all children catch up in the end' and 'if they are gifted in one area, they are usually behind in another'. While these may be true, often they are not.
My child is very advanced verbally. She is also gaining literacy skills well before her peers. She is way ahead mathematically. She has good small motor skills. She is as capable on large apparatus as her peers. She is able to negotiate and cooperate with other children, often ahead of what you'd expect for her age. The only thing she is maybe 'behind' on is on being extrovert and performing in front of other children's pushy parents in dance classes! (we gave up classes and came home LOL)
For my child, there are no areas that are underdeveloped. I don't believe that all the other children will catch up in the end. If that were to be true, then how come dh is way ahead of most of his peers still intellectually at 37? And how come I'm way ahead of mine? I'm not saying that she is Einstein, but she is 'gifted' in many ways. This poses a real challenge in parenting her.
For example, what do I do when I visit schools and look at the curriculum for Kindergarten, and realise that she has mastered just about every thing on their list two years before she is even going to start in K?
What I"m trying to say is that it can be incredibly frustrating as the parent of a 'gifted' child to have your child's special needs constantly dismissed by others. I've heard a lot of this as I've been touring schools recently. "Oh, we'll go back over the basics - mums don't tend to cover phonics very well", and "Oh, even if she can read, she may be behind in math, so we'll focus on her weaknesses". Aagh, she knew all her shapes at 18 months, can count up to 20 random objects, and will tell me interesting facts about how she's arranging her triangular blocks to make squares or rectangles. In two years time, I hardly think she'll be needing remedial maths!
The assumptions about 'gifted' children are enormous. They are often correct, but not always. If a parent were to say, is my child behind or delayed, they would get support and help. If you say that your child has special needs because she is ahead of her peer group, you are often dismissed or people get offended and tell you all children are gifted.
Just trying to point out that being 'gifted' presents its challenges. All children are individuals, and the needs of very able children deserve to be catered for along with all the others. It can be worrying having an able child, you worry about how to challenge them but how to keep them socializing with their peers. It's exciting and fun, but it isn't easy.
I'm just trying to point out how it sometimes feels to have a child at this end of the spectrum.

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