ITA agree that it is wrong, perhaps mostly thoughtless on the part of your employer. I have been in a similar situation and ultimately stopped watching the child after having raised the issue in a clear way and getting a run-around defensive response and inadequate resolution.
When a relationship is friendly and casual it is easy for the employer person to get casual about paying. You're so nice, they don't think you'll mind. They're so busy, they're juggling, you don't LOOK needy or act desperate or anything. Sigh.
Anyhow, I am sure you want to be nice about it and the approach I would use would be to begin by asking them if they need to change the timing of payments, because whatever day you are paid you need it to be reliable. Explain, perhaps, that you often plan your grocery shopping for payday or something simple like that. Then, I would also include paying in advance in the discussion. Many, many child care providers require this. IME almost all day cares do as well. So keep that in mind at all times: you ARE asking for something reasonable and normal in the child care field. The idea is to speak of adjusting to meet both of your needs.
Plus it allows a clear logic to come into play, if you pay, you bring the kids--if you don't, you don't.
It is hard because you really care about the kids--your parenting instincts come into it and part of what you do feels unconditional. And your customer senses that--thinks perhaps you do this out of liking her kids instead of as a job and that the payment is an extra for you or something. She takes advantage--probably thoughtlessly.
No matter what, you should approach the conversation assuming she is not aware of or thinking of your needs and once you share them, she will want to make things right for you. What to her is a bill is to you a payday and she should understand.I think if you can keep that frame of mind, you will be able to say the right things.
If she can't adjust then it will be time to resign.
When a relationship is friendly and casual it is easy for the employer person to get casual about paying. You're so nice, they don't think you'll mind. They're so busy, they're juggling, you don't LOOK needy or act desperate or anything. Sigh.
Anyhow, I am sure you want to be nice about it and the approach I would use would be to begin by asking them if they need to change the timing of payments, because whatever day you are paid you need it to be reliable. Explain, perhaps, that you often plan your grocery shopping for payday or something simple like that. Then, I would also include paying in advance in the discussion. Many, many child care providers require this. IME almost all day cares do as well. So keep that in mind at all times: you ARE asking for something reasonable and normal in the child care field. The idea is to speak of adjusting to meet both of your needs.
Plus it allows a clear logic to come into play, if you pay, you bring the kids--if you don't, you don't.
It is hard because you really care about the kids--your parenting instincts come into it and part of what you do feels unconditional. And your customer senses that--thinks perhaps you do this out of liking her kids instead of as a job and that the payment is an extra for you or something. She takes advantage--probably thoughtlessly.
No matter what, you should approach the conversation assuming she is not aware of or thinking of your needs and once you share them, she will want to make things right for you. What to her is a bill is to you a payday and she should understand.I think if you can keep that frame of mind, you will be able to say the right things.
If she can't adjust then it will be time to resign.
