Just wanted to let you guys know I'm here. Nothing to add, just commiserating and remembering it.
This past weekend I've spent every day organizing and cleaning the house top to bottom. I went so far as to wash windows & blinds, wash walls, doorknobs, and doors, take a little broom and get the edges & corners, washed laundry till it's coming out my ears, rearranged so things are more welcoming and warm, and basically making the house nice again.
Do you know how long it's been? Do you know why?
After my miscarriage 3 years ago
: I kind of lost it. You know? Just... I know some of you know what I mean. Anyway, I lost Adia in Aug 05, we moved here in June 06 and I was still reeling, of course. Keeping up with housework was a HUGE struggle, though I did what I could. It wasn't by any means neat and tidy, but I made sure we had food, clean dishes, clean clothes, etc. We lived kind of cluttery and all, but ok enough to get by. It was all I could manage w/ my mental state.
Then 7 mos after our move I got a BFP.
. Well, there went all housekeeping! All I remember of that period is mountains of clothes and constant dirty dishes. I was too sick to do anything.
The next 10 mos was really hard because it all fell on dh to do it. He did dishes, did laundry, got the kids up in the morning for school, made breakfast, lunch, and dinner (we ate a lot of fast food), worked a FT job, just everything.
Once ds2 was born I was still really overwhelmed because of the changes in the family dynamics and all. Not to mention recovering from HG.
FINALLY, this past weekend, I was inspired and motivated to do a really deep clean. It feels SO GOOD. I finally feel like I have some semblance of normal in my life again!!! THANK GOD!
I can breathe. I don't feel overwhelmed and hopeless now.
It took till the baby was 10 mos old, but we made it!
There is hope!
Anyway, I'm just proud of myself and glad to finally be able to move forward.